11 sinais de que ele não quer dormir com você e 7 razões para isso
You’re used to watching out for red flags of a guy who sees you as nada mais do que um engate. You know the type: the one who only calls you after midnight and who’s clearly not interested in building a deeper emotional connection.
But what happens when the tables turn around? What are the signs he doesn’t want to sleep with you?
Sim, estas coisas também acontecem. Sei que, na maior parte do tempo, desumanizamos os homens e pensamos neles como máquinas de sexo que fariam qualquer coisa para ter sexo.
Nevertheless, sometimes you couldn’t drag him into the bedroom, even if his life depended on it. The biggest problem with this is that usually, girls have a hard time taking hints.
You don’t even take this as an option. You’re young, attractive, and funny- who wouldn’t want to sleep with you?
Well, I hate to be the one to break it to you but it appears that you’ve run into an endemic species.
11 Signs He Doesn’t Want To Sleep With You
You know how you act when you don’t want to have sex with someone? Well, men and women are pretty much the same, despite all of their differences.
So, when a guy doesn’t want to sleep with you, here are some behavioral patterns he is likely to display.
Ele fez-te um "friendzoned
If you’re being honest, you’ll admit that this guy probably doesn’t see you as more than a friend. It’s the bitter truth but he simply doesn’t look at you like that.
You put a lot of effort into seducing him but the fact is that he doesn’t see you as material de namorada. Of course, this has nothing to do with your appearance or personality and it certainly doesn’t make you any less worthy.
You might not be his type- that’s all. This man is obviously different and he doesn’t have the ambition to sleep with every pretty girl on the planet.
On the other hand, he appreciates all of your other qualities- otherwise, he wouldn’t have kept you in his life at all.
Ele pensa em si como uma grande pessoa, apenas quer ser o melhor amigo com. Ele gosta de passar tempo consigo e nunca iria estragar a amizade fantástica que têm por uma noite de sexo sem sentido.
Of course, you don’t share his opinion but that’s a whole other thing.
The bottom line is that for this guy, you’re one of the boys. He even often calls you “dude” or tells everyone that you’re the closest thing he’s ever had to a sister.
You probably do have a significant place on his priority list but that doesn’t mean he sees you as a sexual being. I’m sure he loves you- just not the way you would want him to.
Evita o contacto físico
You don’t usually agree to have sex with someone and then just proceed on doing it. The fact is that the foreplay itself actually begins way before the bedroom.
When someone is into you, he’ll use every chance he gets to touch you. I’m not saying that you must cuddle or make out while eating dinner on your first date but when a guy wants to sleep with you, he’ll definitely engage in some kind of physical contact.
Or at least, he’ll try doing so and it’s up to you whether you’ll let him or not.
For example, he’ll grab your hand, hold you a bit longer in his arms when abraçar-te or put his hand on your knee when he’s telling you a story. The examples are endless but I’m sure you know exactly what I’m talking about.
Bem, este tipo de interação não se encontra em lado nenhum entre si e este homem. Na verdade, ele afasta-a sempre que tenta estabelecer algum contacto.
Obviously, he doesn’t literally push you away but he does everything in his power to avoid giving you an opportunity to touch him.
Puxar para trás
He’s always the first one to let go when you’re hugging (beware that he’s also never the one to initiate these hugging sessions). When you grab his hand, he just holds it there before pulling away without grabbing you tighter or putting his other hand on top of yours.
Whenever you touch him, his first reaction is to pull back. It’s like an instinct he can’t control which makes it more than obvious that this man isn’t comfortable with your skin on his.
His body doesn’t have the desire to join with yours on this innocent level so how do you expect your intercourse to feel?
I know what you must think- he probably doesn’t want to be all pushy or ele está a fazer-se de difícil. Bem, querida, pára com o auto-engano.
Let’s not forget that he is just a human being. Trust me- if he wanted to touch you (and if he weren’t bothered by you touching him), it would be very clear.
He doesn’t let you invade his personal space
One of the biggest warning signs he doesn’t want to sleep with you is the way this man literally doesn’t let you near him. It’s not that he just avoids your touch- he also doesn’t let you invade his personal space.
Podemos vê-lo nas pequenas coisas que parecem irrelevantes mas que, na verdade, são mais importantes do que pensamos.
Quando gostas de um tipo, sentas-te ao lado dele? Sim, senta-se.
If you’re in a crowded room, will you choose to yell a little harder so he could hear you or you’ll pull closer to him? I know that the latter is the answer.
Well, the Mr. in question doesn’t behave like that at all.
Even when you two dance, it’s never to slow music. When you meet at a restaurant or a coffee shop, he’ll choose to sit as far away from you as possible. If you’re in a car together, he’ll never put his arm on the armrest if yours is there already.
Sounds funny, I know. But pay attention to these things and if most of them are true- I’m sorry but he doesn’t want you close to him.
Ponham-no à prova e vejam o que acontece
Make a test to see if this is true. If the two of you are standing or sitting next to each other, move an inch in his direction (but don’t allow him to notice that you’re doing it on purpose). I bet that he’ll instinctively move an inch away.
Don’t get me wrong- he’s not doing it on purpose. It’s not like you smell bad or something like that.
He’s not doing it to offend you either. He’s actually probably not even aware of his actions- it’s just an impulse he gets every time you come close.
Most of us are like that. We don’t feel comfortable with others invading our personal area.
Of course, that doesn’t include the ones we like and want to sleep with you. So I guess, this alone excludes you from that group, doesn’t it?
Ele nunca se atira a ti
Yes, some guys suck at flirting while some are born professionals. But hey, when he’s into you and is trying to get you to sleep with him, he’ll flirt with youde uma forma ou de outra.
It might turn out to be awkward and he might be terrible at it but he’ll give it a shot, there is no doubt about that.
He’ll tease you, he’ll make slightly inappropriate or ambiguous dirty jokes, he’ll ask you trick questions. Not only that: he’ll also go out of his way to make you laugh and to make himself look like a macho man.
But there is no flirting on sight when it comes to you and this guy. When you try to tease him or engage in some flirty behavior, he looks at you like you’ve lost your mind and probably even straightforwardly asks you if everything is okay.
He just doesn’t get it. He doesn’t take your hints and he most definitely doesn’t respond to them accordingly.
If someone overheard your conversations or read your texts, they would think that you’re definitely buddies There is no sex, love life, or flirting in your communication.
Em vez disso, a maior parte das vezes, tudo o que se tem é conversa fiada. Discute-se o tempo ou a forma como se passou o dia, mas não há nada escondido por detrás destes tópicos vulgares.
Nevertheless, it’s not just the way he talks to you. To be honest, he never gave you a sexy look, never winked at you or smiled at you in some special way.
I’m not saying this man doesn’t care about you- he just doesn’t love you that way.
Ele não gosta de enviar mensagens de texto em estado de embriaguez
Every girl in the world knows one of the first unwritten rules of modern dating (or hookups and one night stands, to be exact): if a guy only reaches out to you wasted and after midnight- he’s got only one thing on his mind and that’s not a serious relationship.
Yes, that’s right- he’s using you as a engate. He’s been partying all night but he couldn’t get lucky. Or he’s just bored at the house and can’t sleep after a heavy night of drinking.
There you are, thinking how cute it is that he remembered you when he can’t even think straight- that must be a sign of love. It’s not- it’s a call for sex.
Well, imagine how terrible things must be when you don’t even get this. Don’t get me wrong: I’m not trying to tell you that mensagens e chamadas em estado de embriaguez in the middle of the night are goals because they’re not.
But frankly, they’re one of the biggest signs a man wants to fool around. Yes, that’s pretty much the only thing he wants to do but still, the point is that he wants to sleep with you.
On the other hand, the guy we’re talking about clearly doesn’t think of you even when his sex life is on the lowest. Tough break, I know.
Uma perspetiva mais clara
Nevertheless, look at things from a brighter perspective: at least, you know where you stand. I know you want to get nasty with this man but believe me when I tell you that you’re much better off without his drunk texts.
Actually, every relationship expert will tell you the same: everything that’s happening is not such a bad thing.
Trust me: seeing the signs he doesn’t want to sleep with you beats seeing the sinais de que ele só quer dormir contigo any time. You might not see it now but with time, you’ll figure it out and you’ll be happy with the way things turned out.
Ele nunca elogia a sua aparência
I know what you’re about to say: personality is what keeps someone around. It’s what makes us fall in love and what makes us stay together.
And I couldn’t agree more. You can have the hottest supermodel by your side but if you two don’t get along and don’t have any shared interests- what’s the point?
But let’s not idealize things here either. The personality gets you to stay- that’s true. But appearance is what draws the opposite sex’s attention.
Os homens e as mulheres não são assim tão diferentes. Quando queres comer um gajosignifica que o achas atraente. O mesmo se passa nos dois sentidos.
Basically, what I’m trying to say is that a man who wants to sleep with you will eventually make a comment about the way you look.
No, he doesn’t have to be vulgar about it. He doesn’t have to say anything that might humiliate you.
A compliment every now and then will be enough. Yes, some guys will tell you that you look smoking hot in that dress or that they can’t get enough of looking at your rabo grande while some will be more polite and tell you that you’re exquisitely beautiful tonight.
A questão é praticamente a mesma - as formas como foi feita diferem.
On the other hand, this guy will compliment you on other things. He will tell you what a great best friend you are or that you’re an amazing professional in your area of expertise.
Eles vão comentar tudo, para além da sua aparência, perfume e outras coisas que os homens normalmente gostam.
Gostos e comentários nas redes sociais
Another thing to pay attention to is his social media activity. But you won’t be analyzing his posts this time- instead, you have to check out your feed.
You post a sexy selfie on your story- does he reply? He doesn’t have to say anything but does he even react with an emoji? I guess not.
Publica uma fotografia de um ecrã do Netflix. De repente, ele pede-lhe recomendações de filmes.
The same goes for liking and commenting on your photos and posts. He’ll rarely have any reaction to photos of you. On the other hand, he agrees with the attitudes and values you promote on your social media accounts.
He doesn’t show any signs of jealousy
Um homem que gosta de si sexualmente irá sempre ter ciúmes of other guys around you. He doesn’t have to be your actual boyfriend but that won’t prevent him from hating on every male in your surroundings.
He’s threatened by them and he is also a little possessive- even though you’re technically not his. That’s what makes him a human being.
A questão é que nem as mulheres nem os homens conseguem controlar os ciúmes. Pensamos que podemos, mas ele aparece sempre.
Por isso, pare de mentir a si próprio que o seu homem é apenas um profissional em fingir que não tem ciúmes. Come on, he’s the one who gives you advice on your love life without a problem. And he never tells you to break up with the guy you’re seeing.
The harsh truth is that he couldn’t care less who you sleep with. He honestly wants you to find love and doesn’t see himself as a part of an equation.
Seria melhor se parasses de tentar fazer-lhe ciúmes because it obviously won’t work.
Ele não repara nas pequenas coisas em si
As far as this man is concerned, you can cut your hair off completely, he probably wouldn’t notice until someone brought his attention to it. Once again- he doesn’t see you as his potential partner and that’s why he fails to notice little things about you.
Let me reveal a little secret to you: a man who wants to have sex with you, fantasies about the act before it takes place. It’s perfectly normal and it’s something women do as well so don’t pretend that you don’t know what I’m talking about.
Yes, he will probably pleasure himself thinking about you. But that’s not all; if he’s falling in love, sometimes, he’ll just lay in his bed, picturing you next to him.
Nessas fantasias, as imagens que ele tem de si são muito vivas. Ele despe-a lentamente e gosta da ideia de a ter à sua frente.
That’s how every single detail about your appearance gets stuck in his head. And that’s exactly why he would notice the slightest change in your looks.
But not this guy. He doesn’t pay attention to details about you and that shows o seu nível de interesse.
Ele nunca te verifica
Ele pode tentar esconder os seus sentimentos forever but when a guy sees a girl he’s attracted to, he can’t resist but to check her out. He won’t just glance over her- he’ll give her a detailed head-to-toe inspection.
Nevertheless, this is the man who never does that. You can be wearing your shortest and tightest skirt or your pajamas- he’ll be looking at you the same.
Contacto visual
In fact, he doesn’t even make eye contact. When you look him deeply in the eyes, he just looks away.
É claro que este sinal, por si só, pode significar que ele é tímido. Maybe he is insecure and doesn’t have the confidence needed for contacto visual prolongado.
But if it’s combined with all the other signs he doesn’t want to sleep with you, everything is pretty much out in the open.
He doesn’t treat you specially
Um bom sinal a o homem tem sentimentos por si is the fact he treats you way differently than his other female friends. It doesn’t have to be something huge but everyone (including you) sees that, for him, you stand out.
Podem ser as pequenas coisas, como sentar-se sempre ao seu lado ou contar uma piada e esperar pela sua reação.
But these things are nowhere to be found with your guy. To make it even worse, he doesn’t only treat you the same as all of as suas amigas– he treats you as if you were his guy best friend.
Não há tempo individual
Aqui está um grande sinal que pode ajudá-la a confirmar as suas dúvidas: ele nunca inicia um momento a sós. Em vez disso, este tipo quer sempre sair em grupo.
Mesmo quando convida-o para sair, he’ll invite another friend to join you two. Is it possible that he doesn’t notice all the cues?
I think not. It’s more likely that he wants to avoid an awkward situation of having to literally turn you down.
Seja como for, o que importa é que este homem não tem qualquer interesse romântico ou sexual em si.
Ele é demasiado respeitoso
What girl doesn’t enjoy being around a perfeito cavalheiro com maneiras? Mas, ei, não existe tal coisa como educação no quarto.
I’m not saying that your o gajo tem de se transformar num idiota mal-educado se ele quiser fazer sexo contigo. No entanto, o problema é que este homem é demasiado respeitoso.
He never crosses the line- not even a tiny beat and that is starting to annoy you. It’s clear that he doesn’t sexualize you at all; which is sometimes as awful as objectifying you.
Como é que sabes se ele quer dormir contigo?
When a guy wants to sleep with you, he’ll make his intentions very clear.
He’ll start with obscene jokes, he’ll most definitely initiate at least some kind of physical contact, he’ll compliment your appearance and he’ll be checking you out all the way from top to bottom.
Basically, he’ll be doing everything the opposite of the signs listed above. He doesn’t have to tell you about his desires straightforwardly. But trust me- when he makes a move on you, you’ll know.
Será mais do que suficiente que este homem a olhe diretamente nos olhos para que perceba o que ele quer.
Let’s not forget that at the end of the day, we’re animals. We know a mating call when we see one.
7 Sad Reasons Why He Doesn’t Want To Sleep With You
Having to deal with the fact that some guy you like doesn’t want to have sex with you is a hard pill to swallow. But what if the man you’re in a committed relationship suddenly loses interest in bedroom activity?
Acredite em mim - isto é ainda mais doloroso. No entanto, infelizmente, acontece com frequência - especialmente em relações duradouras que entraram numa rotina.
Descobrir que algo está errado na sua relação não é a coisa mais fácil de lidar.
Depois de ter passado tantos anos com o seu parceiro, pensa que não há nada que possa abalar a sua relação mas, de repente, vê-o afastar-se de si.
Está a tentar aproximar-se dele e seduzi-lo mas sempre que tentamos alguma coisa, ele interrompe-nos, dizendo que quer ver um filme ou que está cansado.
You catch yourself worrying about why your guy doesn’t want any physical contact with you and wondering if he is still attracted to you.
You can’t live normally because this is something that is bothering you and you don’t know how to solve your problem.
Bem, se já passou por uma experiência deste género, o melhor que tem a fazer é ser honesto com os seus sentimentos.
Pergunte ao seu parceiro o que está a acontecer e porque é que ele está tão distante. Mesmo que a resposta seja má, pelo menos ficará a saber.
You’ve seen all the signs he doesn’t want to sleep with you, now is time to discuss what causes your man to avoid you in the bedroom.
Quando estamos a falar das verdadeiras razões pelas quais alguns homens podem ficar distantes, eis uma lista das mais comuns.
Ele tem outra pessoa
This is one of the most common reasons why your man doesn’t want to sleep with you. Here is the bitter truth: when a guy doesn’t want to sleep with you, he’s probably dormir com outra pessoa ao lado.
As rough as it might sound, he doesn’t have the physical strength or capacity for two full shifts a day.
Menos sexo do que o habitual pode levá-la a pensar que o seu homem tem alguém ao lado.
Todo o amor e carinho que ele deveria dar-te, está a dar a outra pessoa e tu sentes-te tão mal por isso.
Pergunta a si própria porque é que ele já não se sente atraído por si e porque é que você não é suficiente para ele.
You can’t believe that after all that you have gone through he has found someone else and that your love story doesn’t mean anything to him.
O que fazer?
Yes, extramarital affairs are probably the number one cause for lack of sex. But that doesn’t have to mean it’s what happened to you.
That is why you should, under no circumstances, jump to any conclusions. You two already have your own share of problems so let’s not accuse your partner of doing something without any valid proof.
Mas mesmo que nos sintamos mal nesse momento, devemos reagir ao que nos está a acontecer.
Deve falar abertamente com o seu parceiro, pois só assim poderá resolver o problema.
And if you can’t find any middle ground at least you will know how to cope with all the emotions that are inside you.
Pode não ser capaz de ultrapassar problemas do passado
Se você e o seu parceiro enfrentaram alguns problemas no passado e você decidiu seguir em frente, talvez ele tenha perdido o interesse em dormir consigo porque isso ainda o magoa emocionalmente.
If he is not connected with you on an emotional level, he won’t be able to do that on a physical level either.
Yes, this happens to men as well. He just can’t picture himself being so close to you, after everything you two have been through.
O que fazer?
Mais uma vez, a melhor maneira de encontrar a raiz do problema é através de uma conversa calma.
You shouldn’t overreact immediately because he might be suffering more than you thought.
Em vez disso, tente ter uma conversa calma e normal como dois adultos e fale abertamente sobre os seus problemas.
É a única forma de chegarmos onde queremos. Nalguns casos, talvez won’t be able to continue the relationship mas, pelo menos, saberá qual é o problema principal.
Não está ao mesmo nível emocional que ele
Maybe your man thinks that you are not interested because your behavior doesn’t show that he is the most important person in your life. He puts you and your well-being in the first place but he feels that his love and effort are not reciprocated.
If you are always working and if you are busy with your friends, it is normal that he will think that you don’t want him like before.
Ele pode estar a travar uma guerra na sua cabeça, mas nunca lhe diz nada sobre isso.
Então, quando tentas aproximar-te dele, ele recuará imediatamente porque ele vai pensar que só o fazes quando precisas de alguma coisa.
Essa pode ser uma razão válida para não dormir consigo, mas é apenas porque ambos estão a pensar em algo que não é verdade.
O que fazer?
A comunicação é a chave para uma vida feliz e relação saudável and if you are more open about everything that you are going through, you won’t have any problems like this.
What was the last time you two had a decent conversation? I bet even you can’t remember.
Bem, que tal mudar isso? Comece por aí e prometo-lhe que as actividades no quarto se seguirão.
Tem problemas no trabalho e está stressado
Acredite, quando um homem tem problemas no trabalho, ter intimidade consigo é a última coisa que lhe passa pela cabeça. Claro que isto também se aplica a todos os outros problemas dele.
He will think about solving the problem all the time and he won’t be able to focus on you. This is especially the case for those old-fashioned men who are used to resolving everything on their own.
Actually, this kind of guy won’t even bother you with his problems.
That’s why he won’t be interested in sleeping with you at all. Guys behave like this when they have some problems that they have to solve.
Não só se tornam fisicamente distantes, como também se afastam emocionalmente.
O que fazer?
Um homem nunca admitirá à sua parceira que tem um problema porque pensa que isso o tornará vulnerável, mas, na verdade, só uma comunicação aberta é a forma de resolver qualquer coisa que o esteja a incomodar.
If you notice that he doesn’t talk to you that much and that he prefers spending time alone, you should ask him if you can help.
Talvez ele só precise de um empurrãozinho para se abrir consigo e resolver as coisas.
Ele tem problemas de saúde
Your man may pull away from you if he has some medical problem that affects his sex drive but he doesn’t want to talk about it.
It is known that a partner often hides all their problems from their loved one because they don’t want to make them worry.
Se vires que o seu homem está a agir de forma distante and that you don’t recognize him anymore, you should do something about it.
Mudar a rotina da vossa relação ou passar mais tempo com ele pode funcionar e ele pode voltar à versão antiga de si próprio.
O que fazer?
O mais importante é que seja o seu maior apoio no caso de ele ter problemas de saúde. Tudo é muito mais fácil quando é feito em casal.
For starters, do your best to be full of understanding. Keep in mind that no human being’s sex drive can be at its highest unless they’re in a state of wellness and good health.
O que é importante é não estabelecer qualquer diagnóstico por si próprio. Antes de fazer qualquer coisa, visitem um médico ou um terapeuta sexual e vejam se há alguma questão médica envolvida neste problema.
Ele já não se sente atraído por si
Uma das razões pelas quais o seu homem não dorme consigo pode ser porque ele não se sente atraído por si mais.
This is probably the reason you’ve been looking for, especially in case that your sexual relationship wasn’t this lousy from the beginning but nothing except your change of appearance has happened lately.
People change over time and he might be going through some phase in his life where he doesn’t know what he wants.
If he is not attracted to you because your body changed because of pregnancy, then he is a real douchebag who doesn’t deserve you.
Any guy should make a monument to the woman who gave him kids and if a man doesn’t know to cherish that, then he doesn’t deserve you.
O que fazer?
If you are worried because of him pulling away and if he tells you that he doesn’t want you anymore, there is no need to waste your time on a man like that.
Leave him while you still can because he doesn’t deserve your presence, not even for a minute.
Por outro lado, se realmente se deixou ir, pare com essas práticas! Comece de novo a cuidar do seu corpo e da sua aparência.
Of course, you won’t be doing it because of him but because it’ll make you feel better.
Ele sofre de ansiedade de desempenho
Esta é bastante comum quando um homem está prestes a dormir pela primeira vez with a new girl. So, if you’re at the início de uma verdadeira relação and your sex life isn’t all butterflies and roses- your boyfriend’s performance anxiety might be the problem.
He’s so scared that he’ll let you down that he prefers not sleeping with you at all over allowing that to happen.
It’s obvious that this guy is insecure and has some serious self-esteem issues.
O que fazer?
Tudo depende da gravidade do caso. Por vezes, basta elogiar um pouco mais o seu desempenho no quarto.
That way, you’ll chase away all of his doubts and he’ll believe you that he’s doing a great job.
If that doesn’t succeed, he’s probably dealing with some deeply rooted traumas and issues you’re not qualified to solve. That’s why a sex therapist is your choice!
Outras inseguranças
On the other hand, maybe he’s aware that he’s a stunt in the bedroom. But did you make it clear that you want the same thing he does?
Has it ever occurred to you that this guy isn’t making the first move because he’s not so certain whether you’ll turn him down or not. In that case, you better give him a green light right now!
What Does It Mean When A Man Doesn’t Want To Sleep With You?
I won’t sugarcoat it for you. If a man displays signs he doesn’t want to sleep with you, your relationship is in a crisis (if you’re together) or he doesn’t like you that way (if you’re just getting to know each other).
Your man refusing sex is probably just a consequence of a much deeper issue he’s dealing with. His behavior might have different meanings: that he’s having an affair, that he’s stressed out, or that he’s dealing with some health problems or even performance anxiety.
Nevertheless, whatever the reason is, I want you to know one thing: this doesn’t make you any less of a woman.
Para terminar:
The most important thing to have in mind is this: A man displaying the signs he doesn’t want to sleep with you doesn’t make you any less worthy. You’re still beautiful and attractive and I’m sure you’ll find someone who’ll see you that way.
It doesn’t matter if we’re talking about your long-term boyfriend or about some dude who doesn’t give you the attention you want- this is not your fault and not something you should blame yourself for.
I’m begging you one thing only: don’t let this unfortunate situation ruin your confidence.
Most importantly: don’t feel guilty for seeing it as a problem. You’re made of flesh and blood and it’s perfectly natural for you to see sex as a huge part of every relação saudável.
