14 coisas para saber quando a sua mulher quer um casamento meio aberto
“My wife wants a half-open marriage”… I think this is the hardest sentence a man can say out loud. I have nothing against polyamorous relationships when both partners agree to it, but in my opinion, it’s a little difficult when one partner wants to make it one-sided.
No entanto, também sei que IF you love your wife, you’ll choose to stay with her, no matter what. You’ll stay married to her even if she suggests a half-relação aberta.
On the other hand, I also understand you and all of your mixed emotions. It’s definitely not easy to go through something like this, and I want to be here for you and make your journey through this new life path at least a little bit easier. So, let’s do this.
14 coisas a ter em mente quando a sua mulher quer um casamento meio aberto
Portanto, se a sua mulher quiser isto tipo de relação all of a sudden and you don’t know what to do, I hope these tips will bring you peace and brighten your path so you can make the right decision.
1. Pense nas possíveis razões que a levaram a pensar num casamento semiaberto
I know you couldn’t even imagine this when you were saying “I do” to your wife, but it’s happening, and now you need to think about how you’re going to deal with it.
Se acha que ainda consegue fazer com que a sua mulher mude de ideias, então tem de pensar em todas as razões que a levaram a tomar este tipo de decisão.
O seu relação sexual bom? A faísca entre vocês ainda está viva? Ela mostrou algum desejo por poliamor quando estavam a namorar?
These are all the questions you need to ask yourself to understand your wife’s sudden need for a half-open marriage. And once you come to a conclusion, you should try to fix that part of your marriage or talk to her about it because that might make her give up on the whole half-open marriage thing.
2. Confia no teu melhor amigo
I know it’s not easy to go through this all alone, so my advice is to share what’s going on with the person you trust the most. Naturally, it’s not easy to go to your friend and tell them, “my wife wants an open marriage,” but in the end, if they don’t understand you, who will then?
I’m sure your melhor amigo estará lá para o apoiar, independentemente da sua decisão. Mais importante ainda, podem até dar-lhe alguns bons conselhos sobre o que deve fazer para o ajudar a tomar a decisão certa.
Afinal de contas, o seu melhor amigo é a pessoa que o conhece melhor, talvez até melhor do que você próprio. Is there anyone better to consult with regarding something like this than your bf? You can bet there isn’t!
3. Tem a certeza de que consegue lidar com o facto de a sua mulher ter sexo com outras pessoas?
You won’t just need to see your wife with a new partner, but you’ll need to accept the fact that she’s having sexual relations with another man. Tens a certeza que consegues lidar com isto?
Most men are very protective over the woman they love, and they don’t like to share with anyone else. If you’re one of these men, then don’t even try with the whole half-open marriage thing because you’ll freak out the first time your wife tells you she has another sexual partner.
4. Abrir-se com ela
Direct and open communication is the key to making this type of relationship work. If you don’t communicate all your needs in the beginning, your marriage will already be doomed to fail.
Whatever it is that you’re feeling right now, you need to share it with your wife. If at any moment you start feeling that you can’t handle it anymore, you should approach her immediately and admit that you’re having second thoughts about it all.
5. Isso afectaria a confiança entre vós?
Se acha que todo este novo conceito no seu casamento levaria a uma quebra de confiança, tem de o comunicar à sua mulher, porque isso seria um enorme quebra-galho.
If you want to make this work, you’ll need to trust each other above anything else. If it affects the trust between you, you’ll slowly start growing apart and decide to split up sooner or later.
6. You’ll need to set some ground rules
Definição regras básicas e limites claros são necessárias. É preciso ser claro e inequívoco sobre estes aspectos logo que se decide a iniciar esta nova viagem.
If you aren’t okay with your wife doing something with new partners, you need to tell her right away. On the other hand, if she doesn’t want you to be involved in her other relationships, she also needs to say that and include it in her boundaries.
7. E fazer controlos regulares
As much as it’s important to have open communication, it’s also important to have regular communication. You need to share how you feel often because there will be a lot of mixed feelings along the way, especially when your wife meets her first new partner.
Controlos regulares evitará qualquer falha de comunicação entre vós e tornará tudo muito mais fácil. That way, your partner will know how you feel in every moment, and they will be able to sense when something is wrong with you or when you aren’t okay with certain things.
8. Manter as suas expectativas realistas
Right from the beginning, you’ll need to set and maintain realistic expectations. Don’t expect your wife to change her mind one day and go back to having um relação exclusiva consigo novamente.
A verdade é que pode nunca acontecer, e é preciso ter consciência disso. If you can’t handle sharing your wife with other men, just say so right away – don’t keep those false hopes in because they may break your heart.
9. Resolver todos os seus problemas subjacentes da forma correcta e atempadamente
Depois de definir o regras básicasDeve também eliminar todas as dúvidas que possa ter sobre a sua mulher. I know you have so many questions running through your head, so don’t be afraid to ask her each and every single one of them.
You’ll encounter many ups and downs if you decide to have a half-open marriage. And you’ll need to take care of them in time if you want to maintain your marriage.
10. Os ressentimentos escondidos conduzirão, mais cedo ou mais tarde, ao divórcio
You might immediately accept your wife’s suggestion just to make her happy or to keep her by your side, but this would definitely be the wrong decision. You need to think it through and be ready for everything that comes with it before accepting your wife’s suggestion.
Caso contrário, o ressentimento oculto acabará por destruir completamente o vosso casamento. If you aren’t honest from day one, you can be sure that you won’t be able to maintain your marriage.
11. A sua vida sexual será definitivamente afetada
I’m not sure how, but the fact is that your sex life will be affected by the new concept in your marriage. It may be beneficial, but it will also bring many new issues into the bedroom.
That’s why you need to set clear boundaries regarding a relação sexual também. A sua mulher terá de ter cuidado com o seu novos parceiros and use protection every time to keep you both safe. It’s really the regra de base para todos relações abertas.
On the other hand, your wife may learn some new things, and you may start experimenting with different sexual positions and toys in bed. That’s the good side of having a half-open marriage, reigniting the spark between a married couple.
12. Mantenha a sua ligação forte
You’ll need to work on your connection constantly. If, at any moment, your connection starts weakening, you can see it as the end of your marriage.
You won’t be able to handle the casamento semiaberto thing if you don’t keep your connection rock solid. Open relationships are never easy to maintain, but when the couple has a strong connection, they’ll always know clearly what their priorities are.
13. Don’t let other people’s opinions affect you
É necessário ter em conta o facto de que um muitas pessoas são contra poligamia and won’t approve of your decision – even some of your loved ones may be against it. However, the decision is up to you, and you shouldn’t bother about others and their opinions.
They have their own lives, and they should focus on them. Don’t let their judgy looks interfere with your decision because you and your own happiness are all that matters in this story.
14. O que a tua mulher quer é importante, mas o que tu queres é muito mais importante!
Your wife’s wishes are important, but yours are equally or even more important. While you’re making a decision, try to keep that in mind.
I know that you want to make your wife happy and that you would make all of her wishes come true if it were up to you. However, do you really want to be stuck in a marriage where you don’t feel happy for the rest of your life?
Este pode ser um momento da lâmpada for you because you might now understand that your wife doesn’t love you the same way you love her. She is more than enough for you, while on the other hand, she’s the one who wants to try new relationships and have a half-open marriage.
Um casamento meio aberto pode funcionar?
It can, but even if it doesn’t seem like it, a lot of work and effort is needed to maintain this type of marriage. The truth is, todos tipo de relação pode resultar quando o casal está empenhado em lutar para que resulte.
A coisa mais importante para manter um casamento semiaberto é a honestidade. Ambos os parceiros precisam de ser honestos um com o outro a toda a hora e de ter relações sexuais regulares. check-ins where they’ll be able to share their feelings.
Outra coisa que um casal deve fazer num casamento semiaberto é definido algum regras básicas. Without it, things won’t be completely clear to both sides, and sooner or later, those discrepancies will raise far greater issues and problems.
Also, open communication is a must in these types of marriages (it’s actually a must in every type of marriage). All underlying issues need to be solved on time; otherwise, they’ll provoke bigger issues and lead to a potential divorce.
Os casamentos abertos têm taxas de divórcio mais elevadas?
It’s a fact that non-monogamous marriages have a low success rate. It’s probably due to the fact that most couples run into it too soon or without thinking it through properly.
Alguns estudos demonstraram mesmo que o 92% de casamentos abertos falham e acabam em divórcio. It’s really not that hard to believe this data because it’s very hard to maintain this kind of marriage.
Both partners need to be in it 100%, and if one of them isn’t honest about their feelings, their casamento aberto está em perigo. And once a couple decides to try a non-monogamous relationship, it’s hard for them to get back on track and continue having a monogamous marriage. It’s actually close to impossible.
Um casamento aberto pode ser unilateral?
It can, but it’s very difficult to maintain that kind of marriage. Mais cedo ou mais tarde, o parceiro que quer ter um casamento monogâmico começa a sentir-se desconfortável e muda de opinião sobre o casamento semiaberto coisa.
Actually, it’s hard to maintain an open marriage, and it’s so much harder and way too complicated when it’s half-open.
Os parceiros ou têm de ser muito liberais, ou têm de estar perdidamente apaixonados um pelo outro. Mais uma vez, como eu disse, haverá algumas reconsiderações e reavaliações que poderão levar ao fim do casamento.
No encerramento
Lidar com a situação difícil que se segue quando uma esposa quer um casamento semiaberto nunca é fácil, especialmente quando o marido ainda está loucamente apaixonado pela sua mulher. It’s easy for those who’ve stopped loving their wives because they can simply reject their suggestion or respond to it with divorce.
Most men want a traditional marriage, and that’s what they hope they’ll get when they commit to one woman. Of course, a casamento tradicional será sempre um casamento monogâmico – não-monogamia não faz, de modo algum, parte da tradição.
That’s one reason most men will struggle to accept this idea, and the wife’s wish for a half-open relationship will, in most cases, lead to divorce.
O que se passa é que tem de ter em mente que precisa de tomar uma decisão e, independentemente do tipo de decisão, ninguém tem o direito de o julgar. If you love your wife and feel that it’s the right thing to give her what she wants, go for it.On the flip side, if you can’t accept it or think that a non-monogamous relationship would make you miserable, you have every right not to agree to it. Mesmo que isso custe o seu casamento, afinal, a sua felicidade e paz de espírito devem ser a sua prioridade.
