homem e mulher sorridentes sentados num banco junto à água

Guia sobre como fazer com que ele a escolha em vez da outra mulher

When you’ve reached the point where you’re wondering how to make him choose you over the other woman , your love life is a real mess.

You know that you shouldn’t be competing with someone else for your man’s attention, but you just can’t help it. 

Tudo o que você quer é que o homem que ama acabe com essa rapariga, para que você possa ser a única mulher na vida dele. No entanto, é óbvio que ele tem um problema em escolher entre uma mulher e outra. 

Well, even though competing with some other girl is not something you should be doing, we’re not here to judge. Instead, we’re here to your rescue. 

Here is exactly what you should do to make him pick you over all other girls in his life. Read on and you’ll find out how to make him choose you over the other woman in no time. 

1. Ser cativante mas não carente

mulher com mochila e homem sentado perto de água

A maioria das mulheres comete o mesmo erro vezes sem conta quando se trata de encontros, independentemente da concorrência.

Algumas raparigas tornam-se demasiado pegajoso quando encontram um tipo de quem gostam.

Pensam que dar muita atenção ao seu homem fará com que ele perceba o quanto estão apaixonadas por ele e, consequentemente, fará com que ele as escolha em vez de qualquer outra pessoa.

De acordo com esta lógica, todas as pessoas com bom senso ficarão com quem cuida delas e as ama. 

Por outro lado, algumas raparigas fazem-se de difíceis. 

They think that this way, a guy of their interest will be intrigued by them and they will play with his ego to the point where he’ll make it his mission to make them his. 

According to this logic, once this guy realizes that they’re actually in love with him, he’ll be head over heels for them.

Looking from two different perspectives, each one of these approaches is perfectly reasonable. Theoretically, they both make sense, despite the fact that they’re completely opposite.

However, somehow, in practice, neither of them works. Well, that’s why I’m here to reveal a trick that is actually efficient in real life.

mulher de camisola às riscas encostada a uma vedação de madeira

O segredo está em encontrar o equilíbrio perfeito. Basicamente, tem de encontrar um compromisso entre ser cativante mas não demasiado carente. 

The moment a guy sees that you’re madly in love with him, he’ll start taking you for granted. In your situation, he’ll probably end up going to the other girl who is not giving him enough attention. 

Por outro lado, se jogar demasiado difícil de obter , it’s likely that he’ll get tired of constantly chasing you around. In your situation, he’ll go to the other girl who is giving him love and comfort. 

Por isso, o que precisa de fazer é mostrar um certo interesse por este homem. Deixe claro que quer que ele seja seu e que as suas intenções não são ser amiga dele.

However, don’t be on his back all the time. Give him space and show him that you’re a tolerant woman with a life of her own.

Mostre-lhe que escolhê-la significa ter uma mulher que se preocupa profundamente com ele e que, ao mesmo tempo, nunca tentará limitar a sua liberdade.

Sounds like the perfect blend, right? Well, that’s exactly what every man thinks and what will faz com que ele te persiga

2. Provocar e namoriscar com ele

homem e mulher sorridentes a conversar em pé ao ar livre

Por vezes, a ação fala mais alto do que as palavras. O mesmo se aplica às relações amorosas, especialmente nas fases iniciais. 

What I’m trying to say is that you should allow your body language to speak on your behalf before you verbally make your emotions or intentions clear. Play a game of cat and mouse.

Para começar, use o contacto visual para namoriscar com este homem. Olhe-o profunda e sedutoramente nos olhos. 

Then whenever he looks back at you, bite your lip and look away. This way, you’ll intrigue him and he won’t be certain about what you want from him, which will faz com que ele te persiga ainda mais. 

Estará ele a imaginar coisas? Estás mesmo a olhar para ele como mais do que um amigo ou é tudo da cabeça dele?

Estes dilemas que passam pela cabeça dele são benéficos para si. Afinal de contas, quer que ele pense em si, pois esse é um caminho seguro para que ele se apaixone por si. 

Also, don’t forget to engage in physical contact with him. 

mulher e homem sorridentes estabelecendo contacto visual ao ar livre

Now I’m not saying that you should be all over this guy. So, don’t kiss him all of a sudden. In fact, your job is to inspire him towards taking the first step. 

Instead, be as near to him as possible whenever you’re around. Talk to him quietly in the ear, touch his hand when you’re talking, and keep him in your arms for a bit longer every time you greet. 

At first glance, this doesn’t have to mean a lot. However, trust me when I tell you that men are big fans of physical affection. 

No, I’m not talking about sleeping together here only. I’m talking about other forms of intimacy as well.

Queres que esse rapaz se sinta mais seguro ao teu lado do que ao lado da outra mulher no jogo. Queres que ele veja o teu abraço como mais caloroso, as tuas piadas como mais engraçadas e o teu sorriso como mais largo. 

Well, every time you flirt with him, you’re impacting his subconsciousness. This way, when he remembers you, he’ll remember the butterflies he felt when you were looking at him.

3. Don’t obsess over the other woman…

homem e mulher estabelecem contacto visual enquanto estão sentados perto de uma tenda

When you’re trying to figure out how to make him choose you over the other woman , involuntarily this other woman becomes your obsession. 

After all, you can’t help but see her as your arch enemy and obstacle to happiness. So, you can’t stop thinking about her.

Bem, o que nunca deve fazer é permitir que o seu homem repare nisso.

I know you have the desire to talk trash about her, but trust me, it’s better to ignore her existence than to make her even more important than she already is.

O erro número um que as raparigas cometem nestas situações é chatear o rapaz por causa da outra rapariga. 

This way, even when she is not present in his thoughts, you’re putting her there, by constantly bringing her name up. 

Consequently, you’re causing a counterproductive effect. After all, you want your guy to forget about her, don’t you?

How exactly do you plan to achieve that if you’re the one who keeps talking about her? Instead of achieving your final goal, you’re actually making her the third wheel in your relationship.

Besides, showing that you’re obsessed with this other woman will make this guy think that you’re insecure

You’ll show your jealousy and only succeed in boosting his ego and assuring him that he’s this big stud. 

4. …but investigate her

mulher de camisola cinzenta a olhar para o telemóvel

Nevertheless, just because you won’t mention this other girl to your man, it doesn’t mean that you should really ignore her existence.

Nesta situação, ela é alguém que tens de derrotar, o que significa que todas as informações que possas ter sobre ela são preciosas.

You can’t defeat your enemy when you don’t know what you’re battling against. That is exactly why it’s a good idea to investigate your opponent before making any moves. 

First and foremost, visit her social media profiles. This is where you’ll learn a lot about her personality, lifestyle, and appearance. 

Tenta também fazer perguntas sobre ela. Eu sei que isto parece injusto, mas descobrir alguns podres sobre esta mulher seria o máximo. 

However, whatever you do, please be careful. You don’t want her to find out that you are investigating her because that would just boost her ego and make you look like a lunatic stalker.

duas mulheres a conversar sentadas num banco

Lembre-se: o seu objetivo é ser melhor do que ela em todos os aspectos possíveis. 

This is where you’ll need to be realistic. Try to disregard your jealousy and see this woman for who she is.

Há aqui duas possibilidades. Num caso, podes vê-la como muito pior do que tu. Isto não passa de um mecanismo de defesa. 

Even though this approach will boost your ego, it’s not such a good thing since you’ll underestimate your enemy, which can be the cause of your final downfall.

In the other case, your insecurities might explode. You might see this girl as much better than you – more beautiful, smart, educated, interesting…

Se isso acontecer, a sua autoestima ficará arruinada.

You won’t be able to show to your man how alta qualidade de uma mulher e até tu próprio pensarás que ela o merece mais do que tu, que não és suficientemente bom.

Well, this is another situation where balance is required. That is why it’s important to be realistic about her since it’s the only way to see both her good and bad sides. 

5. …and bring up her flaws

homem e mulher sentados numa manta na praia perto do mar

Once you learn more about this girl’s weak spots and negative sides, it’s time to use them against her. However, you’ll have to be sneaky with this one as well.

At first, you might think that this is unfair. Nevertheless, don’t forget that this is a type of war – all is fair in love and war. 

Let’s put things this way: For example, you know that your guy can’t stand the fact that this other woman is nagging him about going out with his friends. 

The first impulse you have is to directly criticize her behavior. You want to tell him that she’s not right and you’d never treat him that way.

Wrong! If you do this, he’ll assume that this is just the jealousy talking.

He won’t believe in your honesty but think that you’re just trying to make her look bad. Which is exactly what you’re doing. However, he shouldn’t know that.

homem e mulher a conversar sentados em cadeiras ao ar livre

So instead of this direct approach, let’s try something else. You were advised against mentioning this girl and this is exactly what you’ll continue to do. 

Neste exemplo concreto, seja paciente e espere que surja o tema dos ciúmes ou do comportamento possessivo.

Or if that doesn’t happen, casually mention a situation your friend is in – of course, a situation you’ll make up. 

Either way, the point is that you’ll point out how you can’t understand women who are control freaks in their romantic relationships.

You’ll tell him how you enjoy your freedom and how you like it when your partner has friends.

I’m sure you see where I’m going with this. The bottom line is that you act completely clueless to the way the other woman behaves. 

However, you’re subtly painting a difference between the two of you. All of a sudden, you present yourself as his dream girl who has none of the flaws that annoy him most. 

6. Give him what she can’t

mulher sorridente a olhar para um homem sentado à mesa

Now that you’re armed with information, this is the moment where you should use them to your own advantage. 

The bottom line is that you’re competing with this woman and the only way to defeat her is to give your man everything she can’t. 

Por exemplo, se sabe que ele tem falta de atenção, é exatamente isso que ele deve receber de si. 

Muitas mulheres cometem o erro de tentar copiar a outra mulher . Don’t live your own life as her clone. Instead, do the opposite of whatever she’s doing. 

Acima de tudo, ouça o seu homem. Mostre-lhe que tudo o que ele tem para dizer é importante e que presta atenção às suas necessidades. 

Fill the voids this girl has left. Trust me: This way, he’ll feel complete next to you and realize you’re just the girl he needs. 

7. Nunca a confrontar

mulher sentada num sofá de couro preto

When you’re wondering how to make him choose you over the other woman , you know you have to remove her from the equation, for the sake of happiness in your own life . 

After all, your triangle toxic relationship can’t carry on like this forever, can’t it? You want a relação de compromisso com este homem, o que significa que só há lugar para vocês os dois nesta história.  

No, this doesn’t make you a bad person. It just means that you’re putting yourself first and this is exactly what you should be doing. 

Então, o primeiro impulso que tem é confrontá-la. Vê esta rapariga como sua inimiga. Pode até começar a odiá-la. 

Tem o desejo de lutar com ela e dizer-lhe que deixe o seu homem em paz. Quer expulsá-la da vida dele, de uma forma ou de outra, para que vocês os dois sejam felizes. 

Well, let me tell you that this is one of the worst mistakes you could ever think of making. By doing this, you’ll make her feel more relevant than she really is.

Also, you’ll show both of them that you feel threatened by her. You’ll give her power by showing her your insecurities.

mulher a segurar o telemóvel enquanto está sentada no sofá

Besides, your man will see you as rude and impolite, thinking you have no manners and that you’re ready to ruin your dignity just to have him.

Naturally, he won’t appreciate you afterward, even if he happens to choose you over her .

Por isso, por favor, continua a ignorá-la. Na verdade, seria ótimo se pudesse fazer algo subtil para provocar uma reação da parte dela. 

This way, you’ll appear as the victim. You’ll be in a position to ask protection from your guy while she’ll look like a true villain who is trying to destroy your true love and romance. 

No final do dia, seria ótimo se conseguisse fazer com que esta rapariga desistisse do seu homem.

Por exemplo, pode fazer com que ela pense que ele quer ter uma relação a longo prazo consigo e que ela não é mais do que uma terceira roda no vosso romance perfeito. 

No entanto, mesmo que opte por fazer algo deste género, tem de ser o mais subtil possível. 

Envie-lhe pistas indirectas através dos seus perfis nas redes sociais ou com a ajuda dos seus amigos ou conhecidos comuns.

Don’t do anything directly and, whatever you do, don’t reach out to her, even if your life depended on it. 

8. Show him that you’re a unique mulher de elevado valor

homem e mulher estabelecem contacto visual enquanto estão sentados na relva

If you want a guy to see you as committed relationship material, you have to make him understand that you’re one of a kind.

You have to make him realize that you’re special, unique, and high-value .

That you’re nowhere else to be found and that he’ll spend the rest of his life searching for you in other women if he makes the mistake of losing you or letting you go. 

So, don’t investigate the other woman you’re competing against now. Instead, widen your search to all other girls in his life. 

Tente descobrir o mais possível sobre as ex-namoradas dele (ou sobre a ex-mulher, se ele tiver uma).

You don’t have to necessarily show him that you’re better than them – it will be enough to convince him that you’re different. 

Isto deve intrigá-lo o suficiente para, pelo menos, lhe dar uma oportunidade. Ele ficará curioso para ver o que tem para oferecer. 

Por isso, por favor, faça o seu melhor para não se misturar com as massas. Mostre-lhe que se destaca, de uma forma ou de outra. 

Of course, in order to do this in a successful manner, you have to get to the bottom of your man’s personality. You see, not all men are fascinated by the same things. 

No entanto, cada um deles adora a singularidade e é exatamente isso que deve oferecer se quiser que ele a escolha como a única mulher para ele. 

9. Estabelecer uma ligação com ele

homem a falar com uma mulher sentado num sofá

Regardless of whether you two are in a short term or long term relationship (or if you’re in a relationship at all), please do your best to make a deep connection with this man. 

Basically, what I’m trying to tell you is to become friends with him without entering the friend zone. At the end of the day , this is what every man needs : a girlfriend who is also his friend. 

Parece complicado, eu sei. No entanto, pode ser feito se jogar bem as suas cartas.

When I say that you should be his friend, I’m not telling you to become one of his pals like his male friends. 

Don’t comment on other girls with him, don’t spend all of your time together watching football games and drinking beer, and definitely don’t act like a dude in front of him.

Instead, show him that you’re someone he can count on – that you’re the only person in this world who truly gets him.

homem e mulher sentados no chão durante o pôr do sol

Seja a rapariga que lê a mente dele. A rapariga que presta atenção às pequenas e simples coisas da vida dele e que ouve verdadeiramente o que ele tem para dizer. 

The girl who knows what he’s thinking just by looking at him. The girl who remembers everything he’s ever told her and appreciates him. 

Mostre-lhe que a intimidade é muito mais do que uma atividade no quarto. Mostre-lhe a beleza de de mãos dadas e abraços. 

Acima de tudo, mostre-lhe o valor de a ter por perto, aconteça o que acontecer.

Convince this guy that you’re his soulmate. Make him believe that you’ve both spent your entire lives until this moment searching for each other. 

Show him that you’re his other half and that he needs your presence like the air he breathes. 

10. Ocupar o seu tempo

homem e mulher a almoçar sentados à mesa

When you want a girl out of your man’s life, for starters you can’t allow her to be physically present next to them. You know how they say: Out of sight, out of mind. 

Trust me, he’ll start to forget all about her the moment he spends less and less time with her. This is especially true if you’re around so he is not alone with his thoughts and has no time to think about her. 

I won’t lie to you. This is a difficult step when we’re talking about a coworker or someone he is friends with . 

Either way, what you should do is occupy your guy’s time as much as possible. Make sure he spends all of his free hours and days with you so he doesn’t get the chance to reach out to this other girl.

Nevertheless, this is where you have to play it smart. You can’t be too pushy because that will just chase him away.

A melhor opção possível seria obrigá-lo a telefonar-lhe. Arranje uma forma de o manipular para que seja ele a telefonar primeiro. 

If that doesn’t work out, make excuses to be near him. Instead of directly calling him out on a primeiro encontro , pedir-lhe ajuda.

Call him to ask him to give you advice about some made up emergency you have. Tell him that you’re in the middle of nowhere and ask him to come because you have a flat tire.

Seria ótimo se soubesse quando é que ele passa tempo com ela. Utilize esta informação e telefone-lhe a essa hora específica.

Sooner or later, she’ll get tired of your presence and will leave him, even if he doesn’t fall for your bait. 

11. Agir como um desafio

mulher sentada no chão perto do mar

Men love challenges. There’s no doubt about that. Men love to feel like they’ve won you over due to their incredible courting skills. 

Well, this is how you should behave – like a challenge – because this is exactly what every guy needs in his life. No, this doesn’t only mean playing hot-and-cold games.

It means stepping back from him a bit the moment he thinks he’s sealed the deal. It means not being too available and never allowing this man to think that you’re not going anywhere, no matter what he does.

Basically, he can never be certain about you. Because if he is, he’ll assume that you won’t leave him and invest all of his energy into chasing this other girl. 

12. Mostre o seu lado feminino

homem a abraçar mulher sentado num banco

Outra coisa de que todos os rapazes precisam é de se sentirem homens grandes e machos. Todos os necessidades do homem alfa que a sua mulher o veja como o seu salvador e protetor.

You want to know how to make him choose you over another girl ? Show him your feminine side. Make him think that you’re vulnerable and that you need him to guide you through life. 

Of course, this is nowhere near the truth. However, trust me when I tell you he will be enchanted by the fact that you’re fascinated by him.

You see, men have a very fragile ego. Knowing this, you understand why it’s crucial to pump their ego and self-esteem in order for them to feel good about themselves. 

Afinal de contas, sabe como funcionam todos os contos de fadas. Temos a princesa em perigo e depois o príncipe encantado que a vem salvar. 

Bem, esta é a ilusão que tem de criar se quiser que este rapaz a escolha a si em vez dela para uma relação de compromisso. Se necessário, use algumas mentiras brancas para o fazer sentir-se melhor consigo próprio. 

Tell him that he’s the best man you’ve ever had. Convince him that you’d be lost without his help. 

Faças o que fizeres, não ponhas em risco a sua masculinidade a qualquer preço. 

13. Ser positivo

mulher e homem sorridentes sentados à mesa e a conversar

If you want a healthy relationship , you have to build it in a positive environment. Therefore, it’s about time to put a smile on your face and embrace optimism as your lifestyle.

I know that we all have moments when we’re negative or nervous. However, while you’re in the process of winning this man over, don’t let him see this side of you.

Em vez disso, seja a luz para a escuridão dele. Leve a positividade consigo para onde quer que vá e seja aquele que tem a capacidade de trazer alegria ao seu pior dia.

Acredita em mim. Nenhum homem gosta que se queixe. De facto, sempre que entra neste modo, ele deixa de ouvir o que tem para dizer e fecha-se completamente.

So, even if you want to call this guy on his actions, try to do so in a peaceful way. Don’t be the one picking fights all the time or be a drama queen.

Em vez disso, ria-se das piadas dele e tente fazê-lo rir. Quando ele estiver numa situação stressante, seja a pessoa que lhe diz que tudo vai ficar bem.

This way, your guy will connect the feeling of happiness with you. He’ll see you as the silver lining to his cloud. And who wouldn’t want that?

14. Estar no seu melhor

homem e mulher a beber café sentados à mesa

Quer goste de o admitir ou não, a primeira impressão que os homens têm de si baseia-se sobretudo na sua aparência.

No, this doesn’t make them shallow. It’s just how things are: Every guy wants an attractive girlfriend.

Afinal de contas, é preciso considerar um homem fisicamente atraente e bonito antes mesmo de lhe dar uma oportunidade. Bem, então não deve haver ressentimentos quando os rapazes agem da mesma forma.

Don’t worry, you’ll have plenty of time to conquistar este homem with your amazing personality and show him that you’re a high-value woman.

Por agora, no entanto, faça o seu melhor para o deixar de rastos com a sua aparência de bomba. 

Basically, what you have to do is try hard to look your best whenever you know you’ll see the object of your interest. Dress your best, always have makeup on, and don’t forget to smell great.

Nevertheless, there is a hidden trick in all of this. The point is that he shouldn’t notice the effort you’re putting into your appearance. 

Yes, you’ll be in full makeup. However, it should all look natural.

Assim, em vez de usar batom vermelho em todas as ocasiões, opte por um brilho labial. Em vez de usar olhos esfumados durante o dia, opte por sombras em tons terra.

homem e mulher sorridentes estabelecendo contacto visual em pé ao ar livre

The last thing you want is for this guy to think that you’re obsessed with your appearance. 

Trust me, most men will perceive you as “fake” if they see you’re going all out when it comes to makeup and clothes. 

Em vez disso, quer que ele assuma que esta é a sua aparência natural. 

The same goes for clothing. No matter what, always make sure you’re dressed for the occasion.

The thing is to never allow him to realize you’ve spent hours trying on different outfits until you’ve found your perfect one. 

Another important thing is to be perfectly aware of your imperfections. Don’t worry, we all have them and they certainly won’t prevent this guy from trying to chase you . 

Please, don’t allow your insecurities to ruin your entire looks. Instead, be smart enough to hide your flaws and highlight your most appealing features. 

Also, I’m begging you: Never look vulgar. You might think that you’ll attract your guy by showing too much skin, but trust me on this, that attraction is not a long term thing. 

Whatever you wear, don’t forget that you’re a lady.

15. Fazer-lhe ciúmes

mulher sorridente a utilizar o telemóvel enquanto está sentada perto de um homem

Finally, when you’re trying to figure out how to make him choose you over the other woman , don’t forget to turn the tables a little bit. For a change, play a game . 

In your situation, he’s the desirable one. He’s the one who has two women fighting over him – the one in the position to choose. 

Well, show him that two can play that game. Show him that you’re also in high demand and fazer-lhe ciúmes

Make this man realize that he could lose you in no time if he doesn’t make up his mind and choose you for real. Show him that you have a lot of options open.

Há homens por aí que querem ter uma relação saudável consigo, mas aqui está, presa nesta relação tóxica triangular. 

I’m not saying that you should change your behavior and suddenly become promiscuous. 

However, it will be enough for him to see that other guys are trying to reach out to you and that your love life doesn’t depend solely on him. If nothing else, let him see that men are texting and calling you. 

Most importantly, show him that you won’t spend the rest of your life waiting for him to make the decision to break up with her. 

Mostre-lhe que, por muito que goste dele, o seu amor-próprio será sempre maior do que o que possa sentir por ele.

Guia sobre como fazer com que ele a escolha em vez da outra mulher

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