Estou pronto para me comprometer? Aparentemente não, e foi assim que eu soube

Se eu acreditava que estava pronta para me comprometer? Sim. Estava enganado? Também sim.

This time, it really was me. I’m not trying to protect my ex but I need to be sincere and say that it really wasn’t him, it was me.

All my life, I was this girl who couldn’t wait to fall in love and commit to a man who’d love me back even more but then… poof.

Todos esses sonhos se desfizeram como se nunca tivessem existido.

Antes de mais, tenho de pedir desculpa por ter desiludido e magoado um homem que me amava sinceramente.

I’m sorry, it wasn’t on purpose, it’s just… it took me a while to understand that I’m really not ready to commit yet.

If you’re worried that you might have the same questões de empenhamentobem-vindo ao clube e ver estes sinais que me ajudaram muito a perceber como as coisas realmente são.

Sempre questionando a relação

Apesar de ter sentimentos muito fortes pelo meu ex-namorado, nunca tive a certeza de que ele era o homem com quem queria estar para o resto da minha vida.

A nossa relação era boa e saudável, mas eu estava sempre a questioná-la.

Nunca tive a certeza dos seus sentimentos, apesar de ele me ter provado tantas vezes que eram sinceros.

Afterward, I concluded that there was absolutely nothing wrong with him, nor our relationship; the real problem was that I wasn’t ready for a relationship.

Abrir-me com o meu parceiro era demasiado difícil

I was always saying that any man I dated had to also be my best friend. That’s really important for the relationship.

Deve ter a certeza de que acredita no seu parceiro e que pode falar com ele sobre tudo, mas mesmo tudo, desde os momentos mais bonitos da sua vida até aos mais negros.

Unfortunately, I realized that he wasn’t my best friend because I was never able to fully open up to him.

Again, that wasn’t his fault because he was a really good man, the issue was my hidden medo de se comprometer.

As conversas sobre o nosso futuro estiveram sempre fora dos limites

Believe me, he tried so many times to have ‘the talk’ about our relationship with me. But I successfully avoided it every time.

Utilizei sempre algumas desculpas só porque tinha consciência de que não estava preparada para ficar amarrada and I really didn’t want to hurt his feelings.

I now know it was wrong because now he thinks that I was just stringing him along, which really isn’t the truth.

Nunca o envolvi nos meus planos para o futuro

Well, maybe I didn’t want to make any future plans with him but I had so many for myself. I had so many dreams and goals for the future.

The thing is, I never involved him in any of those, like I always knew that it was not going to work and that we wouldn’t stay together.

It’s another way that my inner voice was telling me that I wasn’t ready for that kind of relationship, to commit, but I hadn’t wanted to hear it for so long unfortunately.

Criticar constantemente o meu parceiro

Começámos a discutir até por causa de pequenas coisas e, para ser sincero, fui eu que comecei todas essas discussões.

Não importava o que ele fazia ou como se comportava, eu estava constantemente a criticá-lo.

Now when I think about it, I only wanted to make him break up with me so I didn’t have to do it myself.

You may think that it’s a little bit selfish but I really wanted to make it less painful for him.

Pedi demasiado espaço pessoal

Todos nós precisamos algum espaço pessoal when we’re in a relationship mas eu pedi demasiado.

Eu era mais feliz quando estava sozinha do que quando estávamos juntos.

Compreendo que foi assim que comecei a afastar-me cada vez mais do meu ex.

I’m so sorry for not understanding all these signs sooner because I made it all more painful for both of us.

The word ‘compromise’ wasn’t in my vocabulary

Estava consciente, e continuo a estar, de que o compromisso é essencial se ambos os parceiros quiserem que a sua relação seja bem sucedida.

No entanto, nunca estive disposta a comprometer-me em nada com o meu ex.

I had my own opinions about things and my own way of how things should be done and I didn’t want to change them for him.

That’s the main reason we had so many disagreements in our relationship.

A nossa relação nunca foi a minha principal prioridade

A minha família e todos os meus amigos foram sempre mais importantes do que o meu ex-companheiro. Foi muito errado da minha parte, porque a pessoa que amamos deve ser sempre a nossa primeira prioridade prioridade na vida.

It wasn’t because I wanted to hurt him or anything like that, I just didn’t want to commit so I knew that our relationship wouldn’t last for the rest of our lives.

We all have the right to live the life we want and do the things we like. If you don’t want to be tied down, don’t.

The worst decision you could make is to accept to spend your life with someone just because you’ve been dating for some time but the truth is that you don’t actually want to commit to anyone.