We as humans make major changes in life and as humans we have evolved so much over a period of time, with technology, social media, clothing trends, etc. But one thing that hasn’t changed over this period of time is the expected ‘timeline’ for us to settle down, get married, and have children, all before our ‘biological clocks’ time out.

I’m in my late 20’s and most of my girlfriends are in relationships (or relaçõeshits como gosto de lhes chamar). Costumava sentir que era sempre eu que ficava para trás ou que acompanhava os meus amigos nas suas saídas à noite. Já para não falar que costumava chorar até adormecer à noite, quando me apercebia que a única coisa/objeto com que chegava a casa era o meu animal de peluche Mr.

One day, as I was out with my girlfriends on a much-needed wine tasting adventure, I found myself and my thoughts in a second bottle of rose. I’m not sure whether it was the bubbles or just a waking moment but I realized Eu estava realmente é muito melhor ser solteiro do que nas relações. I had to thank them all for this realization—after all, if it hadn’t been for them continually complaining about their fake relationshits or arguing over who had the best #couplestatus, I’d still be thinking their lives were bliss while mine was shit.

Esses mesmos pensamentos levaram-me a esta conclusão: ser solteiro in your 20’s is the most beautiful and life-liberating experience! So, while some days you may feel hopeless, I can promise you that the journey in finding yourself and who you truly are is well worth the wait. I promise if you are patient with yourself you’ll find you won’t have to repeat that vicious cycle of being the ever so single one. So if you feel hopeless or lonely, I hope you can look back on these 6 ways to realizing that being single in your 20’s is nothing but pure enjoyment.

1. Aprende que a única validação de que precisas vem de dentro de ti

Maybe it was because I wasn’t in the right relationship but I often would get so frustrated when a partner would not compliment me on my accomplishments, no matter how big or small. However, over time and being alone with myself, I have learned that the only validation I need is from within. Aprendi a elogiar-me quando tenho bom aspeto e a felicitar-me quando alcanço os meus objectivos ou realizações. Eu sou verdadeiramente a única pessoa que importa quando se trata de mim própria!

2. A ligação espiritual na descoberta de si próprio

So often when we get into relationships we lose who we are because we are so focused on catering to our partner’s every need. I know we have all been there and that’s OK. However, se dedicarmos algum tempo a estarmos sozinhos, podemos realmente aprofundar-nos nós próprios and ask the important question… what is your true purpose in life?—what is your true calling? Está a fazer tudo o que pode para atingir esse objetivo ou vocação?

3. Podes perseguir os teus próprios sonhos e aspirações

It’s always nice to share dreams and aspirations with a partner. However, o seu parceiro não pode substituir os seus objectivos pessoais. In order to have a fully loving and shared experience with another human being, you must first know how to make yourself happy and fulfilled. If you are unhappy at work, don’t expect a partner to fill that void. Your partner should be that accent to your life—like that great pair of earrings!

4. Não estás preso a nenhuma corrente

Este é o meu favorito absoluto! Não tens ninguém que te impeça de viajar para certos lugares do mundo e não tens ninguém a quem responder. If you decide to wake up and book a flight to Tahiti—you can. You are free to go anywhere at any time. If you want to wear that special dress—go for it. If you want to eat at YOUR favorite restaurant—go for it. That little voice that used to say, “Wonder if he’s OK with this, wonder if he’ll like it, wonder if this fits his style,” has been silenced and replaced by a loud, happy, boisterous shout of being oneself!

5. Podes mimar-te

No passado, passava o tempo a escrever pequenas notas de apoio e a comprar aquela coisa especial para o agradar. Orgulhava-se muito de o fazer feliz, de o agradar. Se ele estava feliz, você estava feliz. A sua prioridade era agradar-lhe em primeiro lugar e acima de tudo. Agora já não! Agora pode mimar-se. Reservar esse dia no spa. Spend a little extra and get that dress you know you’ve been wanting. Who says that little red sports cars are just for men! Go for it!

6. Aprenderá a apreciar melhor as coisas que tem

É capaz de compreender a importância da família e de ter apenas as coisas simples da vida. Uma coisa eu sei com certeza, I’ve found closer relationships within my family and have a better understanding of being grateful for all that I have. No longer do I have to decide between him, HIS family or mine. I have managed to reconnect with my siblings and parents in a way I couldn’t if he was still in the picture. I even have a closer connection with my sweet little dog!

Ver também: A mente de uma rapariga que nunca teve um encontro

So, if any of these ring true for you… estás melhor sem ele. Uma relação pode parecer tão tentadora, mas encorajo-vos a abraçar o facto de ser solteiro. Ainda és jovem, ainda tens a tua juventude. Vai em frente e peguem nessa treta do relógio biológico e deitem-na por terra. Take out your phone and book your next trip to a place you’ve been dying to visit. Take out a pen and paper and write down all the facets of your life that torná-lo fantástico—and while you’re at it, make a list of all the ways you can Mime-se! Prometo que, se abraçares a tua solteirice, haverá alguém que estará disposto a acarinhar-te e que quererá abraçar-te também.