18 sinais de alerta de um namorado controlador
Quando se vê uma mulher que é lidar com um narcisista que está a arruinar a vida dela, pensa para si próprio: O que é que ela está a fazer com ele?
You wonder how come she couldn’t see the bandeiras vermelhas and how she could have been so foolish to believe this guy’s lies.
Bem, apesar de a maioria de nós assumir o contrário, a verdade é que sinais de um namorado controlador são fáceis de perder à primeira vista.
Todos pessoas manipuladorasOs homens e as mulheres, incluindo ele, escondem as suas verdadeiras cores até que se metem na nossa pele e nos arrastam para uma relação tóxica with them – one that you can’t get out of without difficulty.
Well, that’s why we’re here – to save you from an awful fate all those tricked girls had to experience.
We’re here to help you open your eyes through these 18 sinais de alerta precoce de um namorado controlador many girls sadly don’t notice in time.
1. Ele critica tudo o que fazes
One of the first signs that you’re dealing with a pessoa que exerce o controlo is your boyfriend’s constant critique.
Let’s be real here: When there is amor verdadeiro involved, your partner shouldn’t lie to you, telling you that everything is going smoothly and that you’re making all the right decisions, even though that couldn’t be further from the truth.
Em vez disso, aqueles que são seus amigos de verdade vão chamar a atenção para as suas acções. Dir-lhe-ão quando fez algo de errado; apontarão os seus erros a tempo.
This especially goes for your life partner. He should be the one to spill you the harsh truth directly in the eye, even if it’s the last thing you want to hear.
Sim, isso inclui muitas vezes críticas. Este é o homem que quer vê-lo tornar-se um melhor pessoae tem todo o direito de lhe dar a sua opinião e de ser honesto em relação ao seu comportamento e às suas acções.
No entanto, é completamente diferente se todo o seu, obviamente...relação de controlo baseia-se no facto de este tipo criticar todos os teus movimentos e palavras.
Nesse caso, ele não está certamente a tentar ajudá-lo a melhorar ou a influenciá-lo de uma forma positiva; está a fazer o seu melhor para o deitar abaixo.
Este tipo tem de fazer um comentário desagradável sobre cada pequena coisa in your life. He doesn’t like the way you look, dress, talk, behave, walk, eat, smell…
A maior parte das vezes, sente-se atacada por ele. De facto, ao fim de algum tempo, até fica com medo de fazer o que quer que seja, porque sabe que tipo de reação pode esperar dele.
He humiliates your education, your world views are not right, you don’t make enough money, you’re not pretty enough, and the list goes on. Sounds familiar?
Bem, se assim for, uma coisa é certa: este homem está a fazer tudo isto intencionalmente. Ele quer que te sintas o pior possível em relação a ti própria para te poder controlar com mais facilidade.
2. Ele chantageia-a emocionalmente
Whoever’s experienced chantagem emocional sabe como é doloroso e devastador passar por isso.
In fact, the problem with it is that you have a hard time identifying it and understanding that you’re actually being blackmailed.
Of course, once you do, it is usually too late. You’re already trapped in an endless circle of torture, and you need a lot of time, energy, and effort to get yourself out of there.
Então, o que é, de facto, a chantagem emocional? É, de facto, uma técnica em que pessoas manipuladoras (no seu caso, o seu parceiro de controlo) usar os sentimentos que tem por eles ou o seu próprio sentido de consciência contra si.
It usually starts with simple demands, which later on turn into threats once you don’t answer them positively.
For example, if your boyfriend emotionally blackmails you, he may threaten to leave you unless you do things his way – unless you listen to him.
He’ll probably make it clear that he’ll stop loving you unless you obey him. However, things don’t always end at this.
De facto, muitos chantagistas emocionais vão um pouco mais longe. Ameaçam fazer algo a si próprios ou até mesmo tirar-lhes a vida própria if you’re the one who walks away from them or does something they don’t agree with.
Parece horrível, eu sei. A pior parte é que, no início, acreditamos mesmo nelas e lutamos com estas terríveis viagens de culpa.
Even if you doubt that their threats are actually real, there is always that tiny, deep voice inside of your head, wondering “what if?”
E se ele fizer mesmo o que prometeu? Seria capaz de viver consigo própria se este homem se magoasse quando o deixasse?
Por isso, acaba por ficar com ele ou por fazer exatamente o que ele lhe disse para fazer, por medo.
If this is something you’re going through, be aware that this man knows you. He knows your vulnerabilities and weaknesses, and is using them in his favor.
3. Ele isola-te de toda a gente
Aqui está o mais sinal comum de um namorado controlador: isolamento. Todos os homens que tentam controlá-la e manipulá-la farão o possível para que corte os laços com todos os que a rodeiam.
Poderá pensar que ele está a fazer isto porque a ama muito e quer tê-la só para ele. No entanto, isso é apenas um engano em que ele quer que acredite.
Please, don’t feel flattered when a guy tries to control your social and family life. He is doing it because, this way, it’s easier for him to control you.
Tudo isto começa com o facto de ele não gostar dos teus amigos e membros da família. É claro que se trata do vosso povo e que ele não tem obrigação de lhes dar graxa, mas deve certamente respeitá-los.
No entanto, sem darmos por isso, as opiniões e atitudes dele em relação à nossa entes queridos começam a afectá-lo também.
You might not see it at first, but after a while, you notice that you’re growing apart from them and that adopting your boyfriend’s views.
Naturalmente, este tipo nunca lhe diz quais são as suas intenções finais. Em vez disso, ele faz-te pensar que está a tentar abrir-te os olhos.
He doesn’t want you going out at night and coming home late because he is worried about your health.
Ele quer que deixes de andar com essa malta porque ela é uma má influência para ti, que és absolutamente perfeito.
Sempre que sai sem ele, ele faz questão de a estragar. Fica zangado ou deprimido ou telefona-lhe a meio do seu encontro com amigos porque tem uma emergência que só você pode resolver.
Consequentemente, perde-se a vontade de passar o tempo livre com outras pessoas porque sabe o resultado e a confusão que o espera quando o vê.
Or your friends get tired of this behavior and they’re the ones who end up cutting you off.
Besides, all of a sudden, nobody around you is good enough. Your friends are potential backstabbers you shouldn’t trust and are only jealous of you, and your family never appreciated you enough.
Basicamente, ninguém quer saber de ti. Na verdade, ele é o único que te ama verdadeiramente e quer salvar-te de todas essas pessoas más que te rodeiam.
No entanto, a verdade é que ele é o mau da fita. Ele quer isolá-la para a poder controlar com mais facilidade.
It’s actually pretty simple. If you have no one to talk to, the pessoa que exerce o controlo pode fazer-nos uma lavagem cerebral para acreditarmos no que ele quiser.
Não tem melhores amigos para lhe dizer que a vossa relação não é saudável e para a fazer questionar os seus passos e o seu comportamento em relação a si.
Also, when you’re fully isolated from the rest of the world, it will be much harder for you to leave him. You have no one to turn to, no one to support you, and you become completely dependent on him.
4. Ele goza contigo
Every girl likes a guy who can make her smile, and you’re no exception. You enjoy starting a nova relação com um namorado que te faça chorar de riso.
Além disso, o humor é uma parte importante de todas as relações, incluindo as românticas. Afasta a negatividade, traz otimismo e une um casal.
This is all true as long as we’re talking about healthy humor. The way your boyfriend jokes with you is everything but that.
Instead, most of the time, his jokes are intended to hurt you. They’re inappropriate and inadequate.
He is sarcastic and ironic. However, he’s not like that to other people, so it is pretty obvious that his jokes are actually a mask for the insults directed towards you – that this is personal.
Para ser sincero, este homem está a fazer troça de si. Ele não está a tentar ser engraçado e certamente não está a fazer o seu melhor para a fazer rir.
In fact, whenever he’s joking, he’s actually humiliating you. He points out your flaws and ridicules you.
The worst part is that he especially loves doing this when you two are surrounded by others. It’s like he sadistically enjoys everyone laughing at you.
Ele aproveita todas as oportunidades que tem para usar as suas feridas mais profundas e os seus segredos mais obscuros contra si. Este homem conhece as tuas inseguranças e usa-as como base para as suas piadas.
He mocks you and embarrasses you all the time. Basically, this guy is bullying you and there is nothing you’re doing about it.
Even when you confront him about his behavior and tell him straightforwardly that you don’t feel comfortable when he jokes like this, making fun of your sensitivity.
He tells you that he is only goofing around, that he isn’t trying to hurt your feelings, that you should chill and toughen up a little.
5. Ele é paranoico quanto à sua fidelidade
Quando se inicia um nova relação, you’ll probably find this guy’s jealousy kind of cute. You’ll be happy that this man you’ve just met is obviously head over heels for you and wants you all for himself.
De facto, a maioria das raparigas acha os ciúmes bonitos no final fases da sua relação romântica. They see it as proof of their partner’s enormous love for them.
After all, this man is clearly afraid of losing you. In fact, if he couldn’t care less whether or not you leave him and trade him for someone else, it can be a sinal de aviso that he doesn’t care about you either.
No entanto, existe uma grande diferença entre o ciúme saudável e o ciúme possessivo. Quando se tem um namorado controlador, aterroriza-o com a segunda.
Este homem não é apenas ciumento, é paranoico em relação à sua fidelidade. Ele vê todos os homens que se aproximam de si como uma ameaça potencial e como alguém com quem pode estar a brincar nas suas costas.
No início, sentiu-se lisonjeado com isso. Mas, ao fim de algum tempo, vê-o como um grande problema.
Your boyfriend doesn’t allow you to have amigos rapazes. He makes a big fuss when he sees that you’re talking with your amigos homens ou colegas de trabalho, e acusa cada um deles de estar apaixonado por si.
He literally follows your eyes to see where and who you’re looking at. He accuses you of flirting with the guy at the supermarket, the hotel reception, and every other man you have any contact with whatsoever.
É mais do que óbvio que este homem não tem qualquer confiança em si. Ele parte do princípio de que lhe será infiel na primeira oportunidade que tiver, quando na verdade essa é a última coisa em que pensa.
Ele questiona a sua moral e está convencido de que o substituiria por qualquer outro homem.
6. Ele é obcecado pelos seus ex-namorados
And that’s not the worst. Your boyfriend is not only ciumento de outros homens que estão presentes na sua vida agora, ele também está a discutir consigo sobre o seu passado.
This man can’t seem to accept that you had a life before him. He is obsessed with each one of your previous relationships and ex-namorados.
Ele quer saber todos os pormenores de tudo o que fizeste antes dele.
Not only that, he lives in a constant state of paranoia that you’ll go back to one of your exes – that he is nothing more than a rebound – despite the fact that you two have been together for ages.
Tortura-te exigindo que lhe contes tudo pequena coisa sobre as vossas relações antes dele. Depois, quando ele descobre tudo o que quer saber, usa-o contra si e esfrega-o na sua cara.
This guy is actually comparing himself with all of your exes. He wants to make sure that you’ve never loved anyone the way you love him.
Ele é um narcisista que procura validação constante. Ele quer que lhe confirme que ele é o único para si, que todos os seus namorados anteriores foram erros e que nenhum deles significou nada para si.
You can’t even think of staying on friendly terms with any of your exes. Your boyfriend goes crazy even when he sees you greeting them in the street or following them on social media.
7. Ele deixa-te em dívida
O problema com controlo das pessoas é o facto de nunca parecerem ser assim à primeira vista. Pelo contrário, controlar os homens apresentam-se geralmente como demasiado boas para serem verdadeiras.
When you first met your boyfriend, you thought all of your dreams finally came true and couldn’t dream of finding yourself in a relação de controlo.
You couldn’t believe that you were so lucky to meet a man as perfect as him.
Ele era romântico, gave you attention, did you favors, and was there for you, no matter what. This man even bought you presents and offered you his help even when you didn’t ask him to do so.
Naturalmente, considerava-o como uma dádiva do céu. Estava convencida de que ele estava a fazer tudo isto por causa do seu coração bondoso e da profundidade das suas emoções por si.
No entanto, tudo isso era apenas uma parte do seu plano maior, no qual ele tinha a intenção de a manipular.
O teu namorado fez tarefas por ti, emprestou-te dinheiro, deu-te conselhos e resolveu todos os teus problemas só para te deixar em dívida.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not talking about any kind of material debt here. I’m talking about emotional debt this maníaco por controlo imposto a si.
As time has gone on, you can’t seem to repay this man for everything he’s done for you. He constantly reminds you of all the good things you owe him and puts you on endless viagens de culpa.
It is obvious his intentions were never sincere. He never gave you anything from the goodness of his heart, otherwise he wouldn’t be using every opportunity he gets to rub it in your face.
He expects your eternal gratitude. It’s like you should allow him to treat you the way he wants just for the sake of all of the favors he’s done for you.
Even though you should definitely appreciate his sacrifices, it’s important to remember that you never asked him for anything. Basically, you owe him nothing.
Leaving you in debt is one of this man’s ways to control and emotionally blackmail you. By doing this, he is making sure you’ll never leave him.
8. Ele é muito inseguro
Outro dos sinais precoces de um namorado controlador é a sua insegurança, que também é comum nos narcisistas (o que provavelmente é).
Na verdade, isto é comum a todas as pessoas manipuladoras e tóxicas, bem como a maníacos do controlo.
Even though they appear to be self-confident, deep down, they’re actually struggling with deep issues the world knows nothing about.
To the casual eye, you don’t notice that this o homem é inseguro. He will carefully hide his traumas and weaknesses, and he’ll never expose his vulnerabilities in front of you.
You’ll probably see him as this alpha male and tough guy. In fact, you’ll be proud of his dominance and think that you’ve finally found yourself a real man.
However, as time goes by, you’ll realize the devastating truth. You’ll see that this guy actually has deeply rooted autoestima problemas, que ele projecta em si.
Your boyfriend is actually intimidated by you. He thinks that you’re a melhor pessoa than him. Deep down, he thinks he doesn’t deserve you.
Assim, em vez de trabalhar em si próprio para se tornar melhor e digno do seu amor, ele faz algo completamente diferente.
He puts all efforts into dragging you down to his level, since it’s the only way for him not to feel inferior.
Ele quer destruir a sua confiança e transformá-la numa mulher insegura, porque só assim poderá sentir-se igual a si.
Also, he lives in constant fear that you’ll eventually romper com ele.
He is terrified that sooner or later you’ll discover his true colors, realize that you can do better, see that he is not enough for you, and walk away from this relationship.
Basically, your boyfriend thinks that he has to manipulate you into staying with him. He assumes that you would never be his girlfriend voluntarily and that he simply must control you if he doesn’t want to lose you.
9. O seu amor é condicional
Numa coisa não há dúvida: Amor verdadeiro é, entre outras coisas, incondicional. Não tem nada a ver com o seu passado, educação, finanças ou outras coisas.
Quando amamos alguém, amamo-lo independentemente das circunstâncias.
You’re ready to accept this person at their worst, you love them despite their bad sides, you love their imperfections, and you’d support and stand by them against the entire world.
This kind of love can’t be destroyed by anything or anyone. It is eternal and everlasting.
However, these words can’t describe the love your boyfriend feels for you, can they? In fact, this guy’s love is actually conditional.
First of all, this man doesn’t love you when you’re not up to his standards. He doesn’t act like he loves you when you’re not perfect and he certainly doesn’t love your flaws.
He can’t stand you when you’re feeling down or going through some hardships. He is nowhere to be found when you’re nervous, depressed, or in any kind of pain.
Além disso, outro bandeira vermelha sinalizar um amor doentio são condições que ele lhe impõe sem rodeios. Ele quer que faça tudo à maneira dele, por isso manipula-a para que lhe dê ouvidos.
For example, if he doesn’t want you to go out with your friends tonight, he threatens to cancel the date plans you two have for tomorrow night if you disobey him and see your friends despite his wishes.
If you don’t stop wearing short skirts he explicitly forbids you to wear, he’ll stop being nice to your parents and siblings.
Most importantly: if you don’t do everything his way, he’ll stop loving you.
Bem, deixe-me dizer-lhe uma coisa: se o amor é real, não há absolutamente nada que a outra pessoa possa fazer para que as suas emoções desapareçam. Portanto, isso não passa de uma tentativa de o controlar.
10. Ele espera que sigas cegamente o seu exemplo
Segundo este homem, deve fazer o que ele diz e não tem o direito de fazer o seu decisões próprias.
He is the one who knows what’s best for you, the one who will show you the way, and the one who is doing everything for your own good.
Ele é o mais inteligente, o mais sábio e o mais competente. Ele é a pessoa que deves ouvir e cujo exemplo deves seguir.
In fact, most of the time, this man doesn’t act like your boyfriend or romantic partner. He doesn’t treat you as his namoradamas como sua filha, ele deve educá-la e criá-la.
Your boyfriend doesn’t want equality in your relationship. In fact, he expects you to always be one step behind him.
He wants you to see him as your savior and the light at the end of the tunnel. Not only that, he also convinces you that you couldn’t make it without him in life and that you need him to function properly.
He can’t accept that there are times when you disagree with him, that you have some opinions and attitudes that differ from his, and that you don’t follow him blindly through life.
He doesn’t want you to have your own judgment-making skills, which have nothing to do with him. He doesn’t allow you to make your decisões próprias e quer tornar-se o seu líder e a única orientação de que necessita.
11. Queixa-se de ser emocionalmente negligenciado
Quando há amor verdadeiro envolvido, tem um desejo incontrolável de gastar todo o seu tempo livre com eles.
Por muito afeto e atenção que esta pessoa lhe dê, quer sempre mais e sente que nunca se fartará desta pessoa especial.
However, as soon as this infatuation passes, you realize that under these terms, you’re headed towards a relação tóxica.
You continue loving your romantic partner, but you become aware that the two of you are separate individuals and that him not giving you undivided attention for a moment doesn’t necessarily have to mean that he stopped loving you.
Nevertheless, no matter how much effort you put into your boyfriend, he constantly complains about the lack of emotions and attention he’s been getting from you.
He tells you that he feels emotionally neglected and alone every time you get engaged in a single activity that doesn’t include him.
At first, he represents himself as this lonely, deserted, poor man whom you don’t love enough. However, after a while, you’ll realize that this is actually a part of that isolation process we already talked about.
Este homem é um mestre manipulador, don’t forget that. Besides, he is your long term boyfriend, so it is natural that he knows the core of your being.
Therefore, he counts on you feeling guilty for making him feel the way he tells you he does. He’s counting on you cutting off more and more people so you can give him all the attention you need.
He is deliberately destroying all of your get-togethers, hobbies, and interests that don’t include him.
He knows that the next time, for example, someone asks you out, you’ll say “no” because it’s the only way to prevent the consequences of him complaining.
And before you know it, you’ll lose all of your contacts and be stuck with only him.
12. Ele chateia-o com as suas finanças
Quando é casado or living together with your boyfriend, it’s natural that you share expenses. You split the rent and bills, and agree on other bills.
However, even in that case scenario, you should have some money for yourself. After all, you shouldn’t be in a situation where you ask your husband for pocket money, like you are a little child.
Isto é especialmente verdade se tiver a sua própria fonte de rendimento.
Nevertheless, even if you’re a stay-at-home wife or mum, you’re doing your part of the job by taking care of the household, so you deserve to have some money as well.
However, you’re in neither of these situations. We’re talking about your partner here.
It means that you two probably don’t live together or share a wallet. You earn your own money and he does the same.
You don’t go around asking him to feed you or to buy you things. You don’t expect him to financially support you.
Nevertheless, despite all of this, your boyfriend nags about your finances. He is upset when you spend money on something he wouldn’t, when you don’t save enough, or when you buy something he thinks you don’t need.
It’s one thing if you’re financially irresponsible and he is just giving you advice. After all, he is supposed to share his life with you and he doesn’t want to do it with a woman who doesn’t know how to handle money.
However, these are not your boyfriend’s motives. The truth is this guy can’t stand the fact that you’re financially independent and self-sufficient, and don’t need his help when it comes to money.
Besides, he would be delighted if you stopped working. No, he is not telling you to quit your job once you’re married because he wants to take care of you and spare you the hard work.
Ele está a fazer isso porque é outra forma de o controlar. Afinal de contas, se não tiveres dinheiro, tens menos possibilidades de te queixar.
Não tem para onde ir se quiser romper with him. You can’t move an inch without him knowing it. And just like that, he has full control over all aspects of your life.
13. Ele culpa as mudanças
Como já foi referido, uma das sinais de alerta precoce de um namorado controlador é o facto de ele brincar com a nossa consciência.
Este homem conhece-a demasiado bem. Ele sabe como brincar com a tua saúde mentalo que, por si só, é sinal suficiente de uma relação pouco saudável e não amor verdadeiro.
According to him, he’s never to blame for anything bad in your relationship. Even when he makes a mistake and admits it, somehow he manages to turn the tables.
Assim, acabas por ser tu que o provocaste para te tratar mal, ou ele só te estava a retribuir por algo que fizeste há muito tempo.
Basically, whenever something goes wrong or downhill, it’s always your fault. There’s no scenario in which this homem controlador assume a sua quota-parte de responsabilidade e é amnistiado da culpa.
At the end of the day, no matter what happens, you’re always the one who apologizes, begs for his forgiveness, and can’t sleep peacefully because of her mistakes.
14. Ele persegue-te
We already concluded that your boyfriend is insanely jealous. However, things don’t end there. The fact is, this homem controlador também de certa forma vos persegue.
It all started with your social media profiles. For as long as you can remember, he’s been so obsessed with your activity there and wondering who you’ve been mensagens de texto ou com quem conversar.
He always questions your likes, the details of your direct messages, your followers and friends on social media. Whenever you post something, he wonders if it’s actually a subliminal message to some other man.
Ele verifica constantemente o seu estado online e se lê as suas mensagens de texto or not. If you don’t reply to him in seconds, chaos ensues.
He uses different techniques to try and get to the bottom of all of your online activity. You’ve caught him bisbilhotagem no telemóvel e no computador portátil, à procura de mensagens de texto e o histórico de pesquisa mais do que uma vez.
O seu namorado seria a pessoa mais feliz do mundo se partilhasse todas as suas palavras-passe com ele.
Nevertheless, that’s not something you want to agree upon, which he finds extremely suspicious and sees as a bandeira vermelha que deve estar a esconder alguma coisa.
However, his stalking practices don’t end with social media only. In fact, he follows you around in real life as well.
It’s not just that he knows your habits by heart. He also demands that you text him every time you change location and regularly inform him of your whereabouts.
No, he’s not doing it because he worries about your well-being. He’s not doing it because he is attentive or scared for your safety.
He does it so he can use that information against you – so he can stalk you with more ease.
Whenever you go out without him, he “accidentally” shows up at the place he knows you’re at. When you go shopping with your girlfriends, he just so happened to be “passing through” that mall you’re in.
When you’re on your lunch break, he makes sure you don’t spend it with your male coworkers.
In fact, that’s “coincidentally” the exact time in which he can take some time off from work, so he’d be more than happy to keep you company.
Of course, whenever you confront your boyfriend about this behavior, he tries to convince you that you’re imagining things. It’s just mere coincidence and you’re blowing it all out of proportion.
Pode não o querer admitir, mas este tipo de comportamento é doentio e potencialmente perigoso. Este tipo está a sair do mato e a agir como um sociopata.
15. Pensa que tem sempre razão
A homem controlador doesn’t only want to control your actions, body, and life. The worst part is that he will do his best to control your emotions, thoughts, heart, and mind as well.
Therefore, according to him, you always have to agree with everything he says or does. He is always right and you’re always wrong – end of discussion.
He is trying to brainwash you into thinking that he is the most intelligent person in this world. No matter what, he always knows what he’s doing and your function in life is to nod your head to everything he says.
Basically, this man doesn’t let you have an opinion of your own. You have to think with his brain, adopt his attitudes, and follow his moral values.
16. Ele não te dá privacidade
When you’re in a relationship, you and your boyfriend become one. You’re united and if you plan something serious, you go through life hand in hand as melhores amigos, confidentes e parceiros no crime.
However, that doesn’t mean you lose your right to privacy the moment you become someone’s girlfriend or still don’t have your vida própria.
You can spend your entire life beside this man, yet you’re still two separate individuals and no romantic relationship can erase that.
The problem with your partner is that he doesn’t give you any privacy or tempo livre – and that is one of the sinais de um BF controlador. Ele quer saber todos os pormenores da sua vida, incluindo o seu passado.
De facto, fica zangado quando lhe esconde segredos que não estão relacionados consigo, mas com outras pessoas. Ele espera que fale com ele sobre tudo o que se passa consigo. melhores amigos e membros da família dizer-vos.
You can’t do anything without having to inform him first. You have no right to personal time and space.
He doesn’t get that sometimes you have the need to be alone with yourself, that you don’t have the urge to spend every second of your life with him, and that it doesn’t mean your need for personal time and space is a bandeira vermelha that you don’t love him anymore.
You’re monitored 24/7 and all that’s left is for this man to physically enter your brain and inhabit your thoughts as well – something he would definitely do if he had the chance to.
17. Ele quer mudar tudo em ti
Quando um o homem ama-te mesmo, he accepts you with all of your imperfections. Don’t get me wrong: I’m not saying that this man will enjoy your mood swings, nervousness, and other unflattering parts of your personality.
However, he will love them because they make you, you. You wouldn’t be the same if it weren’t for these parts too.
Most importantly, when a man really loves you, he won’t try to change you. He will be your inspiration to be a melhor pessoa, No entanto, ele nunca modificará a essência da sua personalidade.
Um homem amoroso nunca tentará moldá-la de acordo com os seus padrões. Nunca tentará quebrar o teu espírito ou matar a pessoa que eras antes de o conheceres.
He doesn’t see you as a project but as a human being made of flesh and blood. He is not in love with your potential and the woman he could make out of you, but with exactly who you are.
Por outro lado, o seu namorado está a fazer tudo o que pode para a mudar, e isso é um alerta precoce de um relação pouco saudável.
He obviously can’t come to terms with the fact that there are some parts of your personality he has no impact on and, most importantly, can’t control.
18. Ele é abusivo
Controlo das relações são também frequentemente relações abusivas. However, when people hear the words “parceiro abusivo,” they automatically think about abuso físico: socos, bofetadas, golpes e violência doméstica em geral.
No entanto, existem muitas outras formas de abuso para além do abuso físico, incluindo o abuso psicológico e abuso emocional.
What I’m trying to tell you is that your boyfriend doesn’t have to physically hurt you in order to be classified as an parceiro abusivo, apesar de uma das mais sinais comuns de um namorado controlador é também violência.
You see, when a weak guy like him doesn’t get what he wants, he resorts to abusive practices. He can’t accept that he hasn’t managed to control you fully, so he loses his nerve and flips out completely.
A man like this doesn’t have the necessary strength to argue with you in a mature way. He doesn’t have the capacity to fight against his own urges.
O seu parceiro de controlo não é um ser humano racional. Ele é um manipulador and an animal who will become dangerous in the future – if that hasn’t happened already.
