Gracias Por Dejarme Atrás Cuando Más Te Necesitaba

I don’t think I ever believed that I’ll be gracias por breaking me y por ser la lección más dura que he aprendido.

But, here I am. Thank you for doing exactly that because I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you.

I’d probably still believe in every word you say. I’d probably still be stuck waiting for you and hoping that you’ll choose me in the end.

I’d still be waiting for your approval, for your comfort and support. Thanks heavens, I’m not anymore. And thank you for teaching me that.

Gracias por no estar ahí cuando necesitaba que me abrazaras. Porque aprendí a sostenerme.

Cuando los huracanes de la vida intentó separarme...no estabas cerca para sujetarme.

I was torn apart between trusting you and hating you. I was torn apart between moving on and hoping you’ll change.

Torn apart between growing up the hard way and still naïvely believing in happy endings.

Y acabé hecha pedazos, sin nadie a mi lado que pudiera ayudarme a recogerlos. Sin nadie a mi lado que sostuviera los pedazos que recuperé mientras buscaba los aún perdidos.

I did it on my own and for that reason, there’s no way I’ll ever let anyone take them away from me. I still believe in happy endings—it’s just that you’re no longer part of them.

Gracias por no estar ahí cuando necesitaba tu apoyo. Cuando necesitaba que me sostuvieras la espalda, te agarrabas los trastos reclamando mi atención.

Cuando necesitaba que me empujaras hacia adelante, que me demostraras que creías en mí cuando yo ya no creía en mí misma, estabas perdido en tu propio universo.

Cuando necesitaba que sacaras lo mejor de mí, buscabas lo peor.

I faced my first failures alone because you couldn’t bear to be surrounded with so much negativity and sadness.

I drowned in it until I learned how to swim. And now that I’m a bloody shark, I have you to thank for that.

Gracias por dejarme caer cuando te necesitaba para consolarme.

While tears were rolling down my face, you weren’t the one to kiss them away—you were the one who caused them.

When the sound of my breaking heart deafened me, you weren’t the one holding me—you were wielding the hammer.

Gracias por ser lo peor que me ha pasado porque después de ello he descubierto cómo ser la mejor versión de mí.

Gracias por no creer nunca en mí. Me llevó a mis límites. Cuando te fuiste, me sentí miserable.

When you left, I believed everything you said was true—that I wasn’t good enough, smart enough and lo suficientemente fuerte.

I believed that if the one who loved me couldn’t see the best in me, how could anyone else see it?

But the truth is, you never really loved me. You couldn’t see the best in me because you couldn’t see it in yourself.

You couldn’t love me, because you never learned how to love yourself in the first place.

Gracias por hacerme dudar de mí mismo, porque no tuve más remedio que intensificar mi juego. Y maldita sea, qué bien lo hice.

Gracias por no quererme nunca cuando lo necesitaba. Because, finally I understand that love is not about needing someone. It’s about wanting them to be there.

I don’t need you anymore because I have myself. I don’t need your support, your strength, because I have mine.

I’m stronger than I ever was and I love myself in a way I never thought I’d be able to. And funnily enough, I have you to thank for that.

Usted me desnudó de todo lo que era. Me has quitado la sonrisa.

Me quitaste la luz de mis ojos, mi fuerza, mi pasión. No era nada, una cáscara vacía que iba por la vida día a día.

Me llevó meses, años, reconstruirme.

To fill up that shell with so much love, so much passion and so much fucking badassery that there’s no way anyone can take it from me anymore.

I’m no longer afraid of life, because I’m living it to the fullest. I’m no longer afraid of love because I conquered it.

I’m not afraid to let anyone in, to let down my walls, because I know better now.

I’m not afraid to love someone because I love myself more.