El mayor error que cometí fue darlo todo por ti

¡Lo admito! Me enamoré como una loca, sin pensar en el mañana. Te lo di todo sin pedirte que me correspondieras. Fui una tonta a la que utilizaste para tus sucios planes. Eras tan buen actor. Nunca había visto a alguien actuar así, con tantas emociones y el poder de hacer que la gente crea en lo que tú quieres. Y tú hiciste lo mismo conmigo, la chica inocente que sólo quería experimentar algo de amor. Sólo quería a alguien que me cuidara, que me besara y me abrazara porque quería y no para conseguir lo que quería.

¡Lo admito! I made a terrible mistake. I totally lost myself over a toxic man like you. And the moment I gave my all to you, I made a mistake that almost killed me. Living with you, surrounded with your toxic love cost me my nerves, my health and my energy. You were like a vampire sucking all the positive energy from me. You were feeding your poor soul on me, not letting me leave you. During every attempt to leave you, you would tell me that you will change, that you are going through a crisis and that you love me. You knew a great way to deceive a girl who loved you. You knew what to say to make me feel good. You knew when to touch me so I could shiver from pleasure. You knew everything about me because I was like an open book to you. I told you even my darkest secrets while I didn’t have a clue about you. I told you all about my life while you kept your mouth shut. You didn’t want to reveal anything about yourself because there was nothing nice to tell.

¡Lo admito! I stayed longer than I should have, just because of your perfect lies. And that is something I can’t forgive myself for. You told me you are going to change but you kept on with tus mentiras y me engañabas. Siempre que tenías ocasión, me engañabas mientras me decías que yo era la única mujer de tu vida y que estarías perdido sin mí. Contigo nunca me sentí lo suficientemente guapa, digna o inteligente. Siempre eras tú el que llevaba la voz cantante, el que daba sugerencias, el que decidía. Y yo era como una persona al margen, esperando a que terminaras para decirte una vez más que estoy de acuerdo contigo. Nunca nada se ajustaba a mis reglas y, mientras vivía contigo, perdí la confianza en mí misma sobre las cosas que antes se me daban bien.

¡Lo admito! A relationship with you was my biggest mistake and I will never forgive myself for staying with you for such a long time. I was a fool for letting you treat me like that. I gave you my all while you couldn’t even try to fight for what we had. You were such a coward for making me stay with you all this time without any intention to give me the love I needed. And you didn’t let me go find someone who would cherish me just the way I am. You wanted to have someone you could cure your frustration with. And that was the woman who loved you with all her heart. Even if you saw that you were hurting me, you didn’t stop even for a second. You didn’t feel any remorse for what you were doing to me and I was too weak to even react to that injustice.

¡Lo admito! I gave my love to the man who didn’t deserve it. I gave my all to someone who took my heart and walked all over it. I fell for a man who couldn’t love just one person, to be faithful to only one person. I was crazy in love with a man who couldn’t even fight for me when I wanted him to do that. And in the end, I totally lost myself over a man like that. I completely lost myself over a man who meant the world to me but who closed his eyes to all the love coming from me. And now, after all this time alone, I can finally understand that you were just a lesson I had to learn. You were just someone who showed me what I DON’T deserve.

Y debo admitir que Aprendí esta lección de una manera dura. Aún siento el sabor de ese amor tóxico y sigo luchando por volver a ser la antigua yo. Pero nunca perdí la esperanza de días mejores. Y sé que llegarán tiempos mejores. Quizá no mañana ni dentro de un mes, pero llegará. Un día, mi corazón sanará por completo y estará listo para un amor de verdad. Un día, volveré a ser la misma de antes. Y nunca dejaré que ningún hombre me trate como tú lo hiciste.

One day, I will feel the love I craved so much with a man who won’t try to change me. He will just accept me completely and thank you for letting me go.