4 formas en las que un narcisista invalida a sus víctimas

Cada persona es única y tiene su propio conjunto de cualidades y defectos. Sin embargo, todos los que sufren de trastorno narcisista de la personalidad tienen algunas cosas en común.

Each narcissist has one primary goal: To humiliate and put down his victim. After all, it’s the only way they can feel better about themselves.

Invalidating his victims pumps a narcissist’s ego. It gives him control and incredible satisfaction.

Así es exactamente como lo hacen:

Favorecedor

Todos los narcisistas se halagan a sí mismos, sin excepción. Al menos, esta es la forma en que quieren ser vistos a los ojos de los demás, especialmente a los que quieren invalidar.

Exageran cuando se trata de sus logros. Todo lo que consiguen es grande e importante.

When a narcissist talks about himself, he’ll always use superlative only. He’ll present himself as flawless and almost perfect.

At first, you’ll probably admire this man’s high level of self-confidence. You’ll be knocked off your feet by the faith he has in himself.

Sin embargo, esto no es más que una máscara. De hecho, él está haciendo todo esto sólo para demostrar a los dos que él es mejor que tú.

Sin que te des cuenta, este hombre en realidad está compitiendo contigo. Está comparando tus éxitos y te está diciendo sutilmente que está por encima de ti en todos los ámbitos de la vida. En otras palabras, he’s trying to destroy your self-esteem. 

When he does this, he doesn’t have to tell you directly that you’re no es suficiente. En cambio, su fanfarronería te menosprecia indirectamente.

Luz de gas

I’m sure you’ve heard about the term, “gaslighting”. It’s a common tactic almost all narcissists use in an attempt to brainwash their victims.

Básicamente, luz de gas isn’t typical lying. Instead, it’s more about twisting the truth. 

For example, after your fight with a narcissist is over, he’ll do his best to convince you that things didn’t go the way you remember them.

Even though you know very well what you said or heard, he’ll work at changing your memory and making you believe what he wants you to believe.

If you have never experienced something like this, you’ll probably think it’s utterly impossible. However, trust me, this works more often than you might think.

This way, your abuser places a tiny voice at the back of your mind. A voice that keeps on telling you that you’re the crazy one.

Obviously, you can’t be trusted; you misinterpret things and your brain is playing with you.

Esto es exactamente lo que este manipulador quiere que pienses. Quiere que confíes más en él que en ti mismo.

Consequently, you’ll start thinking poorly about yourself. You’ll have doubts about your judgment making skills and you’ll fall into this trap.

Soborno emocional

When someone does nice things for you, you assume that they do it because they’re kind, or you see it as proof of their love for you.

However, in the case of a narcissistic person, things are never what they seem. In fact, whenever a narcissist treats you well, it’s all a part of his emotional bribery.

Es la persona que te hará experimentar tanto lo peor como lo mejor del mundo. La persona que abusar emocionalmente y luego comprarte un regalo caro.

The person who will make you feel like you’re good for nothing and then surprise you with something you’ve always wanted.

No, this doesn’t mean that he loves you. It’s just this man’s way of playing tricks on you.

Quiere mantenerte a su lado, a pesar de todo el horrible trato que recibes de él. Y no sólo eso: También quiere que te sientas culpable por haber dudado alguna vez de sus intenciones y emociones.

Además, when a narcissistic person is emotionally bribing you, they want to make themselves needed. They’re making you emotionally dependent on them.

Also, they’re invalidating everything you’ve ever done for them. Every time a narcissist buys you a fancy present or does something nice for you, he wants you to see that he is better than you.

Te trata mejor de lo que tú nunca le trataste. Es el tipo de compañero en el que nunca podrás convertirte.

Refutar sus sentimientos

“You’re too weak. You’re overly emotional. You’re exaggerating. You’re a real drama queen. You get insulted easily.”

Si alguna vez se ha visto implicado en un manipulador narcisista, I’m sure that you’ve heard each one of these sentences. Basically, the problem is no longer his treatment of you – it’s your reaction to it.

En lugar de ver su error y hacer todo lo posible por corregirlo, el narcisista refuta tus sentimientos. Le da la vuelta a la tortilla y pone el foco en tu reacción ante su comportamiento dañino.

Instead of apologizing, he tells you to toughen up. Instead of admitting that he is the one who is wrong, he convinces you that you’re the problem!

Qué conveniente, ¿verdad?

Whatever happens and whatever tactic a narcissist tries to use on you – don’t ever forget that you’re worthy. Your feelings, thoughts, and memories have value and they’re real, no matter what he says.

I know it’s tough, but you have to learn how to recognize these techniques so you can turn on your defense mechanisms in time and run for your life.