¿Estás entre la angustia y la curación? 7 maneras de superar el limbo emocional

When you find yourself lingering somewhere between heartbreak and healing, you have reached emotional limbo. It’s not a bad place to be. It’s a step in your healing process, a sort of threshold you have to cross to get to your destination.

El limbo emocional significa que estás en el camino hacia tu nueva vida, pero tu pasado todavía te atenaza. Cada vez que das un paso adelante, das uno atrás y eso te mantiene en la misma posición. No estás ni aquí ni allí. No estás en el mismo lugar que cuando se te rompió el corazón por primera vez, pero aún no te has curado.

If you think that it’s time to cross that threshold and continue a new life where you are healed but you just can’t find the right way to do it, we are here to help. There are 7 phases you have to surpass to get yourself out of emotional limbo.

Date tiempo para llorar la relación pasada

We don’t want to grieve. We don’t want sadness over our break-up overwhelming us, so we get stuck in this place of numbness where we just exist. We don’t want to deal with our feelings so we lock them up. We keep telling ourselves that we are OK, even when we are far from it.

That’s why the first step on your way to recovery is to let your feelings out. To cry when you feel like crying. Allow yourself to grieve because it’s purifying and it’s the first step to healing in the right way.

Más adelante te permitirás ser abierto y vulnerable porque sabrás que tu dolor fue lo que te formó y te hizo más fuerte.

Sea amable consigo mismo

Sometimes we are too hard on ourselves. We blame ourselves for the things we haven’t done. We keep on rewinding the past in our mind to see if there is something that we could have done differently to have a different outcome. What we have to understand here is that not everything is in our hands. That regardless of all the love that we feel, some people weren’t right for us. It wasn’t meant to be.

That’s why you have to remember to go easy on yourself. You have to realize that everything that happened was beyond your control and it had to play itself out that way. Also, don’t push yourself too hard—healing doesn’t come overnight, it’s a process and it takes time.

Haz pequeñas cosas por ti cada día

Grief can be all-consuming, that’s why a lot of people going through it will forget all about the importance of good food and rest. Remember to eat properly. Find a way to reduce the stress and relax. Try to get a good night’s sleep, as it will do you wonders. Don’t forget that your body and your spirit are intertwined. Nurture both.

Don’t keep things bottled up inside

It’s important to talk about things that bother you. Find a friend, a group of friends or a counselor to talk to. The worst thing you can do is not talk about it, no matter if it’s the same old story over and over again. When you say things out loud, it’s like you decrease your burden bit by bit. You feel lighter.

Al dejar que tus pensamientos cobren vida, también puedes ver por qué todo lo que ocurrió fue, en última instancia, para mejor. Quizá no hubieras llegado a esa conclusión si te hubieras quedado callado y hubieras seguido alimentando tu pena en lugar de liberarla. Así que, por supuesto, habla, hasta que no tengas nada más que decir sobre el tema.

Cada pequeño paso adelante cuenta

When you are in emotional limbo, you feel stuck. You feel like you are not going anywhere, when in reality that’s not true. You are making small steps forward and they can get so small that you don’t even see them.

Aprende a apreciar todo lo que haces por ti.

Tienes que saber que hay gente que se preocupa por ti y que no estás solo en tu lucha.

That there are people who have been through something similar and their life stories might serve both as comfort and as inspiration for what you still can achieve. You are in control of your life and you can get through anything—you just have to believe it yourself.

Haz que ser feliz sea lo primero en tu lista de prioridades

Haz cosas que te hagan bien, que te hagan feliz y que te hagan sentir mejor. Tómate un fin de semana de spa. Haz un maratón de cine con palomitas y dulces. Haz senderismo.

Ve a nadar. Introduce algo nuevo en tu vida. Apúntate a un curso de cocina. Haz parapente. Aprende a bailar samba.

Pruebe ese nuevo sitio mexicano que acaba de abrir. Las opciones abundan y la elección es suya; lo importante es que haga algo por sí mismo.

Hora de saltar

Once you’ve already been through all the previous steps, you will start to feel like limbo isn’t the right place for you anymore.

Still, the fear of the unknown and saying your final goodbye to the past can be tricky, that’s why you have to push yourself out of your comfort zone.

Incluso cuando no te sientas 100% preparado para seguir adelante, lánzate y espera lo mejor.

Scars from your past might sting a little from time to time but don’t let that trick you into thinking that you are not healed.

Ya has logrado tanto y tienes tanta fuerza que tu pasado no es más que un recuerdo doloroso y tienes una nueva vida por delante. Sabrás que la mejor sonrisa es la que no tienes que agradecer a nadie más que a ti mismo.