Cose di cui parlare con la propria ragazza per creare un legame emotivo migliore

If you’re in a relationship for a longer period of time, it might get just a bit more boring because it seems like you have already covered all the conversation topics at the beginning of the relationship and now you two spend more time being silent than actually talking. I know that through silence you can say thousands of things but that’s not what works in the long run.

In una relazione lunga e soddisfacente, entrambi i partner devono lavorare insieme per creare un ambiente che permetta a entrambi di evolvere in persone migliori e di amarsi di più. Per questo motivo, it’s very important to communicate .

La comunicazione risolve i problemi che potreste avere e, inoltre, le conversazioni lunghe e produttive finiscono per creare un legame emotivo migliore tra voi e il vostro partner.

It might be frustrating sometimes because your opinions might not be the same, but that doesn’t mean you two won’t get along once you dive deeper into the thought processes of each other. In fact, communication and honest conversations are the best signs you and your partner are being intimate with each other.

Because of the fact that a lot of men don’t actually know what to talk about, or you simply might need some inspiration, I’m going to give you some ideas for conversations and things to talk about with your girlfriend.

Complimentarsi a vicenda

This sounds a bit off the topic, but believe me, it’s not. Talk about something productive such as complimenting your partner for doing something good or telling her that she looks really pretty today.

It doesn’t have to be a long conversation but rather some way of showing her that you appreciate her and that you are aware of all the hard work she puts into the relationship.

Show her that you have noticed her new dress she wore today to impress you and show her that you notice her effort. Don’t just let her think that la stai dando per scontata.

Idee per la data

These may be date ideas, vacation ideas or ideas for the weekend. Any kind of planning that will give her something to look forward to. This way you can both voice your ideas, say what you’d like to do and actually turn that into action. It can help you build a better connection because you will be brainstorming about ideas for hours.

Also, something very important here is to visualize. Tell her to close her eyes and let her talk to you about what she wants the experience to look like. Let her talk and then you switch roles. There’s nothing more romantic than listening to your partner talking about your future.

Parlare di lei

Everyone likes to talk about themselves. That’s why the best solution at the end of the day is to talk about her. Ask her about her interests. Her favorite band?

Cosa ascoltava da bambina? Cosa pensa di un certo libro e perché? Dove vuole essere tra 10 anni?

Come vuole guadagnare soldi? Ha mai avuto un momento in cui era estremamente imbarazzata a causa di qualcosa?

These are all amazing questions you can ask a girl in order to make her feel good. She’ll believe that siete davvero molto interessati in what she’s telling you.

Le persone della vostra vita

The people in the life of both of you have a great impact on you. For that reason, it’s very important to talk about them. Ask her about her friends and how she met them, what do they mean to her and how can they make her a better person. Has she ever had a backstabbing friend? How did they solve their issues?

E che dire le sue relazioni precedenti ? Sono cose che forse non vorreste nemmeno sapere, ma che possono aiutarvi nella vostra relazione. Può aiutarvi a non commettere gli stessi errori che hanno commesso le persone che vi hanno preceduto, perdendola di conseguenza.

The thing with this topic is that you don’t really pressure her into talking about it, just ask the first question and if she’s interested in talking about it she’ll continue by herself. Don’t let it seem like you’re insecure and you want to know where the other guys screwed up.

Parlate della sua famiglia! La famiglia è importante per lei e perché? Che dire della sua infanzia? I suoi genitori erano orgogliosi di lei? Come hanno reagito quando ha detto loro il percorso professionale che voleva intraprendere?

Quando vi sentirete più a vostro agio nell'aprirvi l'un l'altro, potrete passare a domande di livello successivo, come ad esempio: i vostri genitori e voi avete avuto problemi durante la vostra crescita? Se sospettate qualcosa, potete chiederle gentilmente se ha subito abusi verbali o fisici.

Queste domande sono così importanti e potrete parlarne per giorni, perché ci sono sempre storie divertenti da raccontare sulla vostra famiglia, sui piccoli litigi e su quanto li amate. Questo vi rende entrambi vulnerabili e dà un senso di vicinanza.

I segreti

You both have secrets. Ask her about the biggest secret she is keeping from the world. Just remember that you can’t really push it. If she wants to tell you, she’ll talk about it. But ask her about her secrets and why she’s keeping them a secret.

Chiedetele delle cose che i suoi genitori non hanno mai scoperto e di alcune scene imbarazzanti che rimarranno per sempre segrete.

Of course, you have to take part in this and talk about your secrets as well and also promise that you will continue on keeping her secrets just that – a secret. This way trust is formed and you are finally able to dive deeper into her soul and see what’s hiding there.

Visione della vita e della religione

Everyone has their own philosophy of life and religion and they are based on things we have experienced. Because of that, it’s important to know what your partner’s view of life is in order for you to understand them better and for you two to see if you’re compatible or not.

But let’s put that aside for a while. Ask her about what she wants to do with her life and what’s her view on life in general. Does she live every day like it’s her last or does she plan out every part of every day? Why does she live her life like that and what are her next steps to living life in a better way?

E che dire della religione? Qual è la sua visione di Dio ? Crede nell'aldilà? Nella sua famiglia c'era qualcuno di veramente religioso?

From whom did she learn what she knows about religion? This really is a topic on which you can talk about for hours on end and never get tired of it because it’s interesting. But again, you have to respect the opinions of each other to the point where you won’t get mad at your partner for thinking or feeling a certain way about this topic.

Paure

Un ottimo argomento di cui parlare, vero? Parlare di paure è di solito uno dei modi migliori per entrare in intimità e conoscere meglio il proprio partner.

La vostra ragazza deve avere quelle piccole paure insignificanti come i ragni e i temporali, ma allo stesso tempo chiedetele delle paure più grandi. Ha paura della morte e perché? Ha paura di non sapere le cose ? Ha paura di essere vulnerabile e di essere ferita?

Queste domande sono davvero efficaci e possono essere mantenute per tutta la notte se siete abbastanza coerenti con le vostre domande senza essere invadenti. Siate comprensivi nei confronti delle sue paure e, se anche voi avete la stessa paura, scambiatevi le vostre opinioni in merito.

Afterwards, put your own opinion into the conversation and tell her about your fears and what scares you in life the most. It’ll be more interesting than you might expect.

Il giorno

So che sembra un argomento noioso, ma raccontare all'altro come è andata la giornata e di quella cosa divertente che qualcuno vi ha detto al lavoro è davvero un ottimo spunto di conversazione. Potete raccontarvi tutti quei momenti divertenti che vorreste che il vostro partner fosse lì a vivere con voi.

If she had an argument with someone, let her tell you the whole story and don’t interrupt her. Let her tell you all the arguments she made in the fight and what was the end result. If you have space to ask questions, do so!

She’ll love that you’re interested and it can lead to deeper conversations. In one day, she can go through many emotions and discussing all of them and finding solutions for problems will keep you busy for a while.

Passioni

Every person has their own passions in life and what they want to do because it makes their blood flow faster. The way people look when they’re talking about things they love really is wonderful!

Per lo stesso motivo, parlare delle vostre passioni e chiederle delle sue ha un certo impatto. Dipingeva quando era piccola? Perché ha smesso? Le piace ballare? Che cosa la appassiona a tal punto che lascerebbe il suo lavoro in questo momento se potesse guadagnarsi da vivere facendolo?

You might have things in common that you can discuss further and give each other advice on these things. You make her feel special, you let her talk and then you just add your own opinion. Believe it or not, that’s how simple conversations are, especially a conversation about your passions.

Felicità

What makes her happy? This sounds very simple but it’s also very productive for your relationship. You can talk about what makes the other one happy and this way, you will know what to do in order to make her happy.

Potrebbero esserci piccole cose come la raccolta di fiori o cose importanti come la salute delle persone che la circondano. Questo potrebbe essere il modo perfetto per innamorarsi with her all over again because you will see that she is human, too, and that you don’t have to do some grand gestures in order to make her the happiest person alive.

La vostra relazione

Un argomento che fa paura. Spesso le persone si sentono vulnerabili a parlare della loro relazione con il partner da una prospettiva diversa. Che ne dite di mettervi d'accordo per sedervi ogni mese e fare una panoramica della vostra relazione?

What can you do better? How can you improve certain aspects in which you’re lacking? What does the other side need that they’re not getting and so on?

The improvement of your relationship should be your top priority. I guess that that’s also the reason why you searched this topic and why you want to improve your communication. Communicate your differences, your wants and needs, your boundaries in relationships.

In questo modo sarà molto più facile per entrambi lavorare insieme e scoprire se siete davvero compatibili o meno .

Matrimonio e figli

Well, why are you wasting time with someone who doesn’t want to get married because they are afraid to commit? Or she wants to commit but you’re the one who’s afraid? How can you know this without asking?

You don’t have to talk about this early on in the relationship, but it is really important to talk about it at some point, so you know if you have a future together and if you have the same view on monogamous relationships and how would you want your marriage to work.

Anche i figli sono un argomento di conversazione proprio per il vostro futuro insieme. Dovete sapere se volete la stessa cosa. Quanti figli volete?

If she wants kids but you, on the other hand, get frustrated every time you’re around kids and you simply don’t want a commitment like that, you have to let her know. It won’t help to try and convince her against her beliefs.

Il sesso

Le conversazioni sconce sono un must nelle relazioni. Il sesso è una parte importante delle vostre relazioni e per questo motivo si può parlare di sesso in due modi:

Il primo modo è quello di parlare di come migliorare la vostra vita sessuale alla perfezione e di cosa avete bisogno che il vostro partner faccia di più (o di meno) per farvi provare più piacere.

Ask her if she’s satisfied and if she wants to try out new things that can help you get a better connection in bed.

The second way is you two talking dirty to each other. You know what I mean—tell her while breathing deeply what you’d like to do to her and what turns you on about her and your sex. Talk about the way you love to touch her curves and the way her moans make you feel like a real man. This gives you both security and reassurance that what you’re doing is pleasurable to the other.

Le notizie

It’s always an interesting topic to talk about the news. There is always something happening in the world that you can research or hear on the news.

What are her opinions on the newest conspiracy theories? There are so many things around us that can be talked about. There is bad news that you can ask her opinion about but there is also lots of good news out there giving you the chance to talk about how you don’t appreciate the little things life gives you. Numerous possibilities. Just find a story that’s interesting to the both of you.

In viaggio

Quali Paesi volete visitare? Perché? Quale nuovo piatto volete provare? Parlare di viaggi è una delle conversazioni più interessanti che possiate fare.

Start a conversation on this topic and you’ll end up discussing different cultures all around the world and you will also be making plans for the future where you two will travel the whole world together.

Even talking about things you’d like to pack with you for certain trips could be interesting. It can get funny and awkward, but you’ll get a better insight into your partner and she into you.

If she is willing to live out of a backpack for months of traveling, you know that she’s open minded for new things and so on. It’s just so easy to get to know a person better when you’re talking about traveling.

Gossip

Gossiping isn’t that bad at all. It’s a great conversation starter and it can go on forever because there is always something to say about someone else.

This doesn’t have to mean that gossip should be bad, but rather that you talk about the behaviors of your friends around you and other couples. You can always learn from them or at least get a solid laugh. Ask her about her work and colleagues – she’ll have a lot to say, believe me.

Lavoro

Work-related things don’t always mean gossip. It can be a conversation about a new project she’s working on and maybe you can give her some advice on how to better handle the team she’s working with. You can also ask her for her opinion on some problems you’re facing at work.

I know that it’s not emotional talk and it’s not something that you would consider to be romantic, but it lets you both know that you are able to look outside the box and that you are willing to help each other in every aspect of your lives.

In questo modo potrete capire se un giorno potreste lavorare insieme. Magari anche avviare qualcosa per conto vostro? Chi lo sa?

Sentimenti interiori

OK, here comes the serious stuff. Talking about your inner emotions, especially with your partner is frightening. It’s making you vulnerable and the whole new level of intimacy is creeping you out. I get it! I get it all. But it’s not a reason why you should avoid this conversation.

If you are angry, try to articulate your feelings—what triggered your emotions and how she can help you feel better.

Also, if you see that she’s been going through some problems and that she feels sad, depressed or anxious, ask her all the questions that are needed for her to open up to you. What caused her feelings? How is she dealing with them?

Can you help her? Women really do want you to continue on asking them questions even after they’ve told you, “I’m fine”. She is not fine! Go and figure out what’s wrong!

Non andate con l'intenzione di migliorare la situazione, perché non esistono emozioni buone o cattive. Le emozioni sono solo un certo modo di reagire alle situazioni per far sì che il corpo torni a essere quello naturale. Just help her by being interested in her emotions. Take part in it and don’t let her feel like she’s alone in situations where she needs you desperately.

Conflitti

Not a pleasant topic to talk about, but at least it’s better than yelling at each other. If you have had a fight recently, try talking about it. It’s extremely important for your relationship to talk about your arguments, fights and conflicts. It lets you make an overview that can help you in your relationship.

When the fight is actually happening, there is usually not much space to talk things through to the core because you’re both very confused.

The adrenalin is causing you to have clouded thoughts and it doesn’t let you think rationally. So now, sit down and talk things through like adults. Find a way to solve arguments productively—in a way where both of you can be happy. There are so many things you can do better if you just talk about them.

Cucina

I am not even joking about this one. I am genuinely telling you to talk with your girlfriend about cooking. Even if you’re not a good cook yourself, talk about different spices, what brands are the best for certain dishes and so on. This is for the pleasure of the both of you.

Potete cucinare insieme come team building per rafforzare il vostro rapporto e trasformarlo in qualcosa di meraviglioso e speciale.

Cucinare è anche il modo migliore per migliorarsi e imparare ad ascoltare le critiche. E mentre fate tutto questo, vi riempirete la pancia con le cose fantastiche che avete cucinato insieme. Non ci sono aspetti negativi nel parlare di cibo e cucina.

Come non esaurire mai gli argomenti di cui parlare

Questo potrebbe essere ancora più importante delle cose che ho elencato sopra.

You see, people think that they don’t have anything to say at all or that what they’re talking about is going to bore the hell out of someone else.

Don’t think that way! You have been given the amazing opportunity to talk with someone you love and you enjoy talking with her. Do not be fooled that you don’t have something interesting to say or an interesting story to tell. Just give yourself space and all of your words will come out easily.

Ascoltate! La chiave di una buona comunicazione è l'ascolto attivo. Quando ascolterete, saprete esattamente in quale momento potrete chiedere una nuova domanda to continue the conversation and you will also know what to ask. Knowing what to ask is crucial because she might be upset with you because you’re repeating a question she already answered and that by itself is a conversation killer. You simply have to listen and hear what she’s telling you.

Remember what she’s telling you. This goes together with listening. By remembering what she told you before, it will be easier to find a way to continue the conversation. If she’s talking about something, you can connect it with something from the past that she was telling you about. By doing this, you will not only help the conversation but also make her think that she’s important enough to you that you remember what she was telling you.

Prendetevi cura di voi stessi. I know that I have listed so many things here that you can talk about with your girlfriend, but putting the focus on her the whole time isn’t an option. Remember that you have to be healthy and happy in order to have the urge to keep the conversation going. Don’t neglect your own needs in order to fulfill hers. How is this a conversation killer, you might be wondering? If you don’t feel good, than there is no conversation to begin with. Prendetevi cura di voi stessi, innanzitutto .

I heard in a movie once that ‘interested is interesting’ and I found that advice to be very helpful! Whenever I turn the conversation in a way that the person talking with me does all the talking and I just listen and keep on asking questions, the communication gets better all the time. When you’re interested in the story of someone, they notice it and they don’t want to stop talking with you.

So now you have some ideas for conversation topics and some tips for always having something to talk about. The next time you’re alone with your girlfriend and that awkward silence is all around you, don’t hesitate to try out one of these topics. They really will help you and your girlfriend have a much much deeper and more powerful emotional connection.