20 sinais de que se deve amar mais a si próprio

Amarmo-nos a nós próprios é, na verdade, mais difícil do que pensamos. Mas, embora o amor-próprio seja tão difícil de alcançar, é crucial para a sua saúde mental e física completa e para a qualidade da sua vida.

You may not know that you don’t love yourself enough because you keep it hidden deep inside but there are some signs which can help you see that you should love yourself more and here are 20 of them.

Coloca sempre os outros em primeiro lugar

Um dos primeiros sinais de que se deve amar mais a si próprio é o facto de colocar sempre os outros em primeiro lugar, aconteça o que acontecer. Este é um sinal óbvio de que pensa que os outros são mais dignos do seu tempo e atenção do que você.

Don’t get me wrong—it is great if you are the type of person who can take care of other people’s needs but it doesn’t mean you need to prioritize everyone else in your life.

Instead, you need to decide which people deserve your love and attention and which don’t.

E, mais importante, é necessário compreender a importância de nos amarmos a nós próprios em primeiro lugar.

Nunca és egoísta

For as long as you can remember, you have always been an empath. You were always that girl who would help everyone out and who would try to resolve everyone’s problems.

And over the years, you’ve learned that being selfish is one of the worst qualities a person can possess.

With time, it’s like you’ve come to the conclusion that you don’t have the right to be selfish.

But I am here to tell you that there is nothing wrong with being selfish in a relationship, whether with friends, family or a partner, from time to time. I am not telling you that your selfishness should have a negative impact on others around you—I am just advising you to prioritize yourself more.

Está rodeado de pessoas tóxicas

Another sign that you don’t love yourself enough is the fact that you are surrounded by toxic people. Most of your relationships, including romantic ones, are unhealthy.

E a pior parte é que tem plena consciência de que essas pessoas e relações não são boas para si. Tens consciência de que deves deixar estas pessoas tóxicas ir embora. But you don’t change anything about your life, do you?

And why is that? You obviously don’t love yourself enough and consequently you think that this is the best you deserve and that you are not entitled to have anything more or better.

É sempre o único a assumir a responsabilidade

É uma grande qualidade sua se for capaz de assumir a responsabilidade pelas suas palavras e actos. Isso significa que é uma pessoa madura que está pronta a lidar com todas as consequências dos seus actos.

But what you need to understand is that every relationship is a two-way street and that you can’t always be the one to blame.

And blaming yourself is exactly what you’ve been doing for as long as you can remember; when you were involved in a group project at school, you always blamed yourself when as coisas correram mal; when a friendship of yours would end, you would think everything was your fault. It’s the same with everything else in your life.

Só se critica a si próprio

You are not a critical person. Instead, you’ve always been someone who tried to justify everyone around you.

But somehow, you are the only person you can’t seem to find any excuse for.

Na sua opinião, todos, exceto você, merecem uma pausa e uma segunda oportunidade.

E quando pensamos nisso, parece que gostamos mais de todos os que nos rodeiam do que de nós próprios ama-te a ti próprio e não é de todo assim que as coisas devem ser.

É inseguro

Outro sinal de falta de amor-próprio são as inseguranças.

Let’s face it—we are all insecure from time to time and there is nothing unnatural about that. But you keep feeling like your insecurities are getting the best of you.

Sente constantemente que não serve para nada e que não é suficiente.

Every bad comment, even if it’s a joke, can affect you and can ruin your day. On the other hand, whenever you hear something nice about you, whenever someone gives you a compliment, you have a hard time accepting it or believing it.

If you wonder why it is like that, the answer is quite simple: you don’t love yourself enough and consequently your as inseguranças fazem-nos pensar que somos difíceis de amar para outras pessoas também.

Nunca se luta pelas coisas que se quer

When was the last time you were really passionate about something? The last time you knew what you wanted and you weren’t afraid to get it? When was the last time you were ready to do whatever it took just to reach a certain goal?

I bet you can’t even remember.

Quando pensamos nisso, na verdade nunca lutamos pelas coisas que desejamos e isso tem muito a ver com a nossa falta de amor-próprio.

You simply don’t think you deserve any of the things you want and you don’t love yourself enough to put an effort into something that you desire.

Sente que precisa de se integrar

Another sign that it’s about time to começa a amar-te a ti próprio mais é o facto de sentirem a necessidade constante de se integrarem.

It’s simple—you don’t feel good in your own skin and you can’t accept the real you. Therefore, you can’t expect others to do the same.

You try really hard to blend in with different social stereotypes, thinking that you’ll like yourself more if you become just like everyone else.

It is obvious that you don’t know that your uniqueness and your qualities which make you stand out from the crowd are exactly the things which make you different and the things you should love about yourself the most.

Nunca te mimas

Quando foi a última vez que comprou um presente para si próprio? A última vez que foi a um spa ou que dedicou um dia inteiro só para si? A última vez que arranjou tempo para ler um livro que queria ou para visitar um sítio que sempre quis ver?

You can’t remember, right?

Estas são todas as coisas que faríamos por uma pessoa de quem gostamos. Faz sempre tudo o que está ao seu alcance para mimar o seu namorado, um amigo ou um membro da família.

But that is not something you are ready to do for yourself, is it? And that brings us to the conclusion that you don’t love yourself the way you should.

You don’t like the way you look

When you come to think of it, you haven’t been satisfied with the way you look for as long as you can remember.

Even when people around you give you compliments about your looks and when you see they find you attractive, you still don’t think of yourself as beautiful.

I know you are not perfect. After all, none of us is. But the problem is that you’ve never learned to love yourself, despite your flaws. You’ve never learned to love your imperfections and to accept them as part of who you are. You’ve never learned to focus on your beautiful sides and you’ve never learned to love yourself completely.

You don’t respect yourself

There is one thing you need to know: there is no love without respect. It’s the same with self-love and self-respect.

You can’t love yourself unless you respect yourself. And sometimes it’s even more difficult to learn to respect yourself than to love yourself.

And when you come to think of it, you understand that you’ve never actually truly respected yourself. You never appreciated any of the things you were doing or any of the accomplishments you achieved.

You’ve never respected your integrity and your personality and consequently you could never demand respect from others either.

You don’t take care of your health

One of the most obvious signs that you should start loving yourself more is the fact that you don’t take care enough about your health.

You simply don’t eat enough or you don’t eat healthily. You don’t visit the doctor as often as you should and you simply don’t take care of your health.

E esta não é a forma como tratarias alguém que amas, não é verdade? Então, porque continuas a tratar-te assim?

I know you probably don’t disregard your health on purpose but the fact is that you are doing it and that this behavior has to have a reason.

The only logical explanation is that you don’t love yourself enough. You can’t seem to find the time or the energy to dedicate to yourself and you wouldn’t do that if you loved yourself the way you should.

You don’t speak up for yourself

Whenever there is something bothering you, you don’t react. Instead, you just let things be, even if you are aware of the injustice done to you.

You never confront people and you don’t speak up for yourself, even when you know you are right.

The truth is that you don’t love yourself enough to even try and make a difference in your life and to fight for something.

You don’t think your opinions matter

Another reason you never speak up for yourself is the fact that you subconsciously think that your opinions won’t be heard.

Pensam que não são importantes e, por isso, as vossas opiniões e atitudes também não são importantes.

And you think this way because you don’t love yourself, even though you might not be aware of it.

You don’t know how to say, “No”

Another sign that you don’t love yourself enough is the fact that you don’t know how to say, “No”. You don’t know how to set boundaries. And not just that—you don’t respect your own boundaries and other people around you just follow your lead.

The truth is that you don’t respect your time and energy enough to say, “No” to some people. You will go out with someone even if you don’t feel like it or you will try to help them even when you know it will cost you a lot.

Duvida de si próprio

Quando pensamos nisso, estamos constantemente a duvidar de si próprio e todas as escolhas e decisões que tomas. Sempre que pomos as mãos em algo, perguntamo-nos se estamos a fazer a coisa certa.

Está constantemente a questionar cada pequena palavra que diz e cada pequena coisa que faz, pensando que poderia ter dito ou feito de forma diferente.

Embora duvidar das suas chamadas de vez em quando possa ser uma coisa boa, se o fizer em demasia, é um sinal de falta de amor-próprio.

Compara-se com os outros

Compara-se constantemente com todas as pessoas à sua volta, começando pelas celebridades e acabando nos seus amigos. E quando o faz, de alguma forma chega sempre à conclusão de que todas essas pessoas são melhores do que você.

Aos seus olhos, eles são mais bonitos, mais bem sucedidos ou mais inteligentes do que você. Em vez de se concentrar nas coisas em que é fantástico e em vez de trabalhar no seu auto-aperfeiçoamento, opta por lamentar o seu destino e continuar a comparar-se com todos os outros.

Concentra-se nas coisas negativas

When you think about your past, all you can think of is the wrong choices you’ve made and the things you could have done differently.

And we’ve all done some things we regret. But you are different because you act like you’ve never done anything right—you only focus on the negative things.

Está sempre a pensar como poderia ter mudado a sua vida se tivesse feito as coisas de forma diferente, porque é óbvio que não está satisfeito com ela.

But the truth is that you are the only one who is keeping yourself from being happy. The truth is that you’ll never be satisfied with yourself until you learn to love yourself.

Não está confiante

Another sign that you lack self-love is the fact that you are not confident in yourself. You simply think you are destined to fail and that you’ll never succeed in anything you set your mind to.

I am not saying you should be an egomaniac but the truth is that you don’t love yourself and therefore you don’t believe in yourself either.

Esta falta de auto-confiança está a afetar todos os aspectos da sua vida e está a impedi-lo de atingir o seu potencial máximo. E vai continuar a fazê-lo até encontrar uma forma de melhorar a sua auto-confiança.

You don’t enjoy your own company

When was the last time you enjoyed spending some time on your own? Every time you are alone, you have dark thoughts and you think about all of your flaws, imperfections and the things you’ve done wrong.

Pode pensar que estes pensamentos são naturais e são-no certamente se surgirem apenas de vez em quando. Mas se estas são as únicas coisas em que consegue pensar quando está sozinho, tem definitivamente um problema.