6 melhores maneiras de se desligar de um ente querido disfuncional

Uma relação é basicamente um teste para ver se vale a pena ficar com essa pessoa durante muito tempo.

Chances are that, right now, it’s not half as challenging as it could potentially become if you’re still together a few years down the line.

À medida que a vossa relação progride, há questões importantes a discutir, decisões importantes a tomar que vos dizem respeito a ambos e muitos sacrifícios e compromissos no horizonte.

So before all that happens, it really shouldn’t be that hard. A sua relação nunca deve ser a principal causa da sua instabilidade emocional ou o que o deixa agitado e ansioso.

Deve ser um refúgio seguro, umas férias do mundo e um lugar onde se vai e que é só nosso.

Um lugar para descontrair, respirar de novo e desfrutar da presença de um ser humano que estimamos e respeitamos.

And when that isn’t the case, and when that very person is the cause of your distress and unhappiness, it’s time to reassess if this is really worth it. If this person is making it difficult now, how much worse will it get in a few years?

I say – don’t take your chances. Life isn’t a picnic. There are so many factors that determine whether you’ll make it or not, so don’t let the dysfunction of this person be one of them.

You’re supposed to be a team. You’re supposed to feel safe and protected around this person, all the while knowing he’s got your back and vice versa.

Sure, things will not always be as peachy as they are now, but at least you’ve got each other!

Se o seu parceiro is causing you anxiety, distress and/or making you unhappy, it’s time to detach yourself from this situation and find yourself somebody who’s going to bring you peace of mind.

Aqui estão algumas formas infalíveis de se desligar da pessoa que ama disfuncional e tornar a sua vida novamente agradável!

Commit to breaking it off and don’t let his persuasion make you stay

Decide that it’s time to call it quits, and don’t go back on your promise to yourself. Once you’ve made this decision, stick by it and find the best way to break it off.

Don’t catch him off guard; rather make plans to meet up (preferably in a café or somewhere with people around) and tell him in advance there’s something serious you need to discuss.

Don’t let his charms persuade you to stay.

Make your case, and stick by what you said. Don’t let him downplay your issues and unhappiness; tell him you can no longer remain with him.

Give him time to process it and don’t rush things. When there’s nothing left to say, get up and leave, wishing him well.

Não prolongar o processo (ser claro e rápido)

When you’ve decided that you’re going to do this, don’t keep making excuses and postponing it. You’re doing yourself a huge disservice.

Make a clean break. The sooner you’re able to sit down and talk, the better. If you stay with him any longer than you want to, you’re only going to resent him more.

Faça-o por si, mas também pelo bem dele. Ele também merece conhecer o seu a relação acabou .

Encontre apoio na sua família e amigos

There’s nothing like a solid support system when you’re going through something like this. Inform them of what’s going on and call them anytime you’re feeling bad or unhappy.

Let them keep your spirits up while you’re going through this breakup and don’t shy away from venting to them.

It’s important to create a safety net for yourself, because you know you’ll eventually need it.

They can cheer you up when you’re feeling down, and keep you company when loneliness kicks in.

With their support, it’s going to be easier and less painful.

Don’t stay friends with your ex

Por muito amigável que seja a vossa separação, não prometam ficar amigos.

Precisa de manter uma distância segura durante algum tempo para se curar verdadeiramente desta situação. Ver a cara dele com regularidade vai tornar isso impossível.

Perhaps with time, you’re going to be able to be pleasant with each other and be okay with seeing him without feeling bad, but definitely not yet. Give it time and keep your distance.

Para o vosso próprio bem.

You don’t need a man na tua vida com quem acabaste de romper devido aos problemas dele.

O que precisa é de um círculo saudável e estável de amigos íntimos e familiares. Só o tempo dirá se poderão vir a ser amigos no futuro.

You don’t need to be his savior (let him figure his shit out)

The last thing you need is to save him from himself. That is no longer your job. You may wish him well and hope he gets better, but you definitely shouldn’t play a role in it.

He needs to figure his shit out himself. Until he realizes how he can be better for both himself and his potential partner, you shouldn’t feel the need to help him figure it out.

He’s a mature grown up and he needs to learn how to act like it. It’s his responsibility and nobody else’s.