7 maneiras pelas quais as garotas quebradas por narcisistas amam de forma diferente

Aposto que pensavas que estavas na a história de amor mais romântica da sua vida quando o conheceste.

Ele roçou em ti e fizeste um clique ou ele beijou-te e o teu mundo virou de pernas para o ar num instante.

Ficaste sob o seu controlo. Eras dele.

But that love story didn’t last for long and it most certainly didn’t have a happy ending.

It took him a long time to lose the mask he put on for his one-man show to impress you, or maybe it’s better to say for his hunt where he captured you in his cruel trap.

He was so addictive. You even knew he wasn’t good for you, but you couldn’t stop. You needed a fix of him and you kept coming back.

Ele era tão consumista e convincente. As suas mentiras eram tão boas que se aproximavam da fantasia.

His story of his ‘crazy’ ex-girlfriend was so real that you believed every part of it until you later found out that she was only a victim the same as you were.

Ele consumiu-te lentamente. Ele preparou lentamente a cena da maneira que lhe convinha. Ele precisava que as coisas fossem à sua maneira antes de atacar.

Fingiu interesse em si e, apesar do seu egocentrismo, fingiu que fez de si o centro do seu mundo.

Ele queria que sentisses que significavas o mundo para ele, por isso começaste a confiar nele.

Quando se confiava nele, o resto era um jogo fácil. Ele tinha-te nas suas mãos. Tu eras impotente.

Isolou-a dos seus amigos e da sua família porque a convenceu de que ele era a única coisa que precisava e queria na sua vida.

Quando finalmente conseguiu fazer-te sentir sozinho neste mundo, atacou.

The mask was off and suddenly this nightmare of yours became real. A little part of your hell became your reality and you couldn’t escape it.

You couldn’t just wake up. It was real – it was happening.

These things became your everyday life. You couldn’t escape it. He assured you that you were the crazy one.

Ele distorceu a sua memória, a sua identidade e apagou a sua autoestima. Eras uma rapariga vazia que ele alimentou com a sua versão distorcida do que estava certo. E tu acreditaste nele.

But everything has an expiration date, and so does this nightmare. So many lies got to you in one place in a short period of time and they left a huge impact – they made a huge BOOM!

Foste abandonado e deixado sozinho, but finally free. You are now the girl who still knows how to love but you love differently…

Não fazes ideia do que é o verdadeiro amor

Talvez tenhas tido um vislumbre de como deveria ter sido no início. Ele fez a coisa certa no início, mas era tudo uma mentira.

It wasn’t because he loved you, it was because he wanted to lure you, to imprison you and destroy you. You never felt real love with him.

Now that you have met the right man, you don’t know how to act around him. You doubt him and this unknown love you’re receiving.

Pensa que tudo é uma grande charada, uma mentira que lhe vai sair cara mais tarde. O amor dele confunde-a e leva tempo a relaxar e a abrir-se para aceitar algo que merecias desde o início.

Tem problemas de confiança

You didn’t have a voice of your own in your previous relationship. You were just an outline and he held the brush to fill you in with the colors he chose.

You hated those colors, but you couldn’t erase them until you took control, until you took the brush and repainted yourself.

Temia-se que se fosse obrigado a reviver tudo desde o início.

Não havia confiança. A vossa última relação foi construída sobre mentiras.

It will take time for you to trust someone again, but your new man knows that. That’s why he gives you all the space you need.

That’s why he doesn’t want to be hurt by the things you do out of fear. He knows you need time to heal and he will be there for you. He will wait for you because he loves you.

You want to destroy everything that’s good

You subconsciously destroy your chance of happiness. You try to sabotage the only real relationship you’ve ever had.

Tentas afugentar o único homem que alguma vez te amou verdadeiramente.

The fact he seems perfect scares you because the narcissistic bastard was also perfect, even too perfect, and you ended up in the lowest pit of your life’s journey.

You try to ruin your relationship now because you can’t accept the fact that something good is happening to you.

You were poisoned for too long and you are unable to accept that there’s a clean and healthy life waiting for you.

Pedes desculpa por tudo

Estava habituado a carregar todo o peso da sua relação. Estava habituado a ser sempre o culpado.

You actually thought everything was your fault. You were in dead-end situations, where you didn’t know how to react properly, so you reached for an apology every time.

Essa era a única coisa que sabia que seria a única coisa que ele aceitaria.

The man who truly loves you doesn’t let you apologize all the time. The man who’s trying to show you real love is ready to confess when he is wrong. He is ready to say, “I’m sorry.”

You’re distant

Demorará algum tempo até que se deixe ir e confie em alguém. Mantém a distância porque ainda está a sofrer e não tem a certeza se este homem é o certo.

You’ve been beaten and you still ache. You don’t want to ache any more.

Your heart is telling you it’s okay and that you should allow him to get near you, but your mind keeps running away.

Don’t worry. That period won’t last forever. He won’t let it last.

He will fight with everything he’s got to prove himself and to gain your trust. He will tie you gently with his love and you won’t be able to escape. He won’t let you.

You are waiting for a ‘boom’

There won’t be any. You are insecure because things are running smoothly.

He is the most wonderful man you’ve ever met and he keeps showering you with all the love and attention you deserve.

Nunca pára. Estás apenas à espera que as mentiras cheguem até ti. Estás à espera de um tsunami de mentiras maléficas e manipuladoras, mas não há nenhum tsunami à tua frente.

Tudo o que se vê é um céu limpo e um mar calmo.

You keep your guard up because you are careful and scared. You’ve built a wall around you, which he will tear down with his love to find you to cherish and nourish back to health.

Este é o capítulo do meu new book “On getting over a narcissist “ disponível na Amazon aqui .

Precisa de se sentir seguro

Precisas de uma promessa de que tudo vai correr bem.

You need him to make you believe that and it’s hard because you have difficulties believing and you know it’s not easy for him either.

Precisas de um lugar seguro onde sejas amado e onde possas finalmente amar de volta.

Precisas dele porque tens todo este amor para dar. Precisam dele para afastar o medo e, com a vossa ajuda, abrir um novo capítulo da vossa vida e das vossas vidas em conjunto.

He knows you love differently, that’s why he loves you even more. You might have been broken when he met you, but you won’t be for much longer.