7 Maneras en que las niñas rotas por narcisistas aman de manera diferente

Apuesto a que pensabas que estabas en el la historia de amor más romántica de tu vida cuando lo conociste.

Te rozó y congeniaste o te besó y tu mundo dio un vuelco en un santiamén.

Caíste bajo su control. Eras suyo.

But that love story didn’t last for long and it most certainly didn’t have a happy ending.

It took him a long time to lose the mask he put on for his one-man show to impress you, or maybe it’s better to say for his hunt where he captured you in his cruel trap.

He was so addictive. You even knew he wasn’t good for you, but you couldn’t stop. You needed a fix of him and you kept coming back.

Era tan absorbente y convincente. Sus mentiras eran tan buenas que rozaban la fantasía.

His story of his ‘crazy’ ex-girlfriend was so real that you believed every part of it until you later found out that she was only a victim the same as you were.

Te consumió lentamente. Lentamente preparó la escena como le convenía. Necesitaba que las cosas fueran a su manera antes de atacar.

Fingió interés por ti y, a pesar de su egocentrismo, fingió que te había convertido en el centro de su mundo.

Quería que sintieras que significabas el mundo para él, así que empezaste a confiar en él.

Una vez que confiabas en él, el resto era un juego fácil. Te tenía en sus garras. Eras impotente.

Te aisló de tus amigos y de tu familia porque te convenció de que él era lo único que necesitabas y querías en tu vida.

Cuando por fin consiguió que te sintieras solo en este mundo, atacó.

The mask was off and suddenly this nightmare of yours became real. A little part of your hell became your reality and you couldn’t escape it.

You couldn’t just wake up. It was real – it was happening.

These things became your everyday life. You couldn’t escape it. He assured you that you were the crazy one.

Torció tu memoria, tu identidad y borró tu autoestima. Eras una chica vacía a la que él había alimentado con su retorcida versión de lo que era correcto. Y tú le creíste.

But everything has an expiration date, and so does this nightmare. So many lies got to you in one place in a short period of time and they left a huge impact – they made a huge BOOM!

Te quedaste roto y solo, but finally free. You are now the girl who still knows how to love but you love differently…

No tienes ni idea de lo que es el verdadero amor

Tal vez tuvo una visión de lo que debería haber sido al principio. Hizo lo correcto al principio, pero todo era mentira.

It wasn’t because he loved you, it was because he wanted to lure you, to imprison you and destroy you. You never felt real love with him.

Now that you have met the right man, you don’t know how to act around him. You doubt him and this unknown love you’re receiving.

Crees que todo es una gran farsa, una mentira que te costará más tarde. Su amor te confunde y tardas en relajarte y abrirte a aceptar algo que te merecías desde el principio.

Tiene problemas de confianza

You didn’t have a voice of your own in your previous relationship. You were just an outline and he held the brush to fill you in with the colors he chose.

You hated those colors, but you couldn’t erase them until you took control, until you took the brush and repainted yourself.

Seguías temiendo que te obligaran a revivirlo todo desde el principio.

No había confianza. Tu última relación se basó en mentiras.

It will take time for you to trust someone again, but your new man knows that. That’s why he gives you all the space you need.

That’s why he doesn’t want to be hurt by the things you do out of fear. He knows you need time to heal and he will be there for you. He will wait for you because he loves you.

You want to destroy everything that’s good

You subconsciously destroy your chance of happiness. You try to sabotage the only real relationship you’ve ever had.

Intentas ahuyentar al único hombre que te ha amado de verdad.

The fact he seems perfect scares you because the narcissistic bastard was also perfect, even too perfect, and you ended up in the lowest pit of your life’s journey.

You try to ruin your relationship now because you can’t accept the fact that something good is happening to you.

You were poisoned for too long and you are unable to accept that there’s a clean and healthy life waiting for you.

Te disculpas por todo

Estabas acostumbrado a llevar todo el peso de la relación. Estabas acostumbrado a ser el culpable todo el tiempo.

You actually thought everything was your fault. You were in dead-end situations, where you didn’t know how to react properly, so you reached for an apology every time.

Era lo único que sabías que aceptaría.

The man who truly loves you doesn’t let you apologize all the time. The man who’s trying to show you real love is ready to confess when he is wrong. He is ready to say, “I’m sorry.”

You’re distant

Te llevará tiempo dejarte llevar y confiar en alguien. Mantendrás las distancias porque aún estás dolida y no estás segura de que ese chico sea el adecuado.

You’ve been beaten and you still ache. You don’t want to ache any more.

Your heart is telling you it’s okay and that you should allow him to get near you, but your mind keeps running away.

Don’t worry. That period won’t last forever. He won’t let it last.

He will fight with everything he’s got to prove himself and to gain your trust. He will tie you gently with his love and you won’t be able to escape. He won’t let you.

You are waiting for a ‘boom’

There won’t be any. You are insecure because things are running smoothly.

He is the most wonderful man you’ve ever met and he keeps showering you with all the love and attention you deserve.

Nunca se detiene. Sólo estás esperando que las mentiras reboten hacia ti. Estás esperando un tsunami de mentiras malvadas y manipuladoras, pero no hay ningún tsunami frente a ti.

Todo lo que ves es un cielo despejado y un mar en calma.

You keep your guard up because you are careful and scared. You’ve built a wall around you, which he will tear down with his love to find you to cherish and nourish back to health.

Este es el capítulo de mi new book “On getting over a narcissist “ disponible en Amazon aquí .

Necesitas sentirte seguro

Necesitas una promesa de que todo va a ir bien.

You need him to make you believe that and it’s hard because you have difficulties believing and you know it’s not easy for him either.

Necesitas un lugar seguro donde te quieran y donde finalmente puedas corresponder al amor.

Le necesitas porque tienes todo ese amor que dar. Le necesitas para espantar el miedo y, con tu ayuda, abrir un nuevo capítulo de tu vida y de vuestra vida en común.

He knows you love differently, that’s why he loves you even more. You might have been broken when he met you, but you won’t be for much longer.