Querido Ex: Já não sou a rapariga que conheceste

Tu mudaste-me, e eu adoro o meu novo eu.

I no longer naively trust you, because now I know your word means shit. I no longer secretly hope that you might show up at my doorstep, having realized what an asshole you were for leaving me, because I know you’re not coming and I know you’re not sorry.

Even if you did knock on my door again, I probably wouldn’t answer. I no longer take chances on a man who took exactly two seconds to decide to dump me and nunca olhar para trás.

Never again will I foolishly blame myself for your mistakes and wrongdoings because now I know it’s most definitely not me. It’s you. It was always you.

See… now I know that I am indeed suficientemente bom. Agora sei que o que tenho para oferecer é substancial, digno e genuíno, e aqueles que me fazem sentir inadequado por isso têm problemas e podem ir-se lixar. (ler: você mesmo).

There are so many lessons I’ve come to embrace with your departure. First one – I am so much stronger than both of us ever imagined. I am capable of enduring this heartbreak and thriving again. I am smarter with my decisions when it comes to men, and I am oh so much wiser.

As mudanças que sinto em mim desde que me deixaste tornaram-me mais aberta ao amor, a novas possibilidades e à forma como me vejo a mim própria.

Obrigada, meu querido e doce ex. Obrigada por me teres ensinado exatamente o que nunca mais devo receber na minha vida.

Thank you for making me see through all the crap I am never going to tolerate again, and for teaching me how to stand up for myself. I was always such a sucker for love… but not anymore. You made sure of it.

Now, I’ve finally embraced my life for what it is. I have entered the dating pool again, and finally, I no longer compare anyone to you. I no longer wish to see your face across from me at the dinner table, and I no longer crave your voice that is feeding me just what I need to hear.

I don’t push guys away from me anymore because I know I deserve to find somebody who will show me love, kindness and honesty.

You thought you did a real number on me, didn’t you? I hope it kills you to see me prospering and seeking any opportunity I come across to be happy without you. Because that’s exactly what I’m doing. And I love every second of it.

I’m not going to sit here and say I never think about you anymore. I do, and I’m not ashamed to admit it. But the good thing is, with every single day, I feel you vanishing from my mind, little by little, and that is what I find solace in. Slowly, but surely… I am erasing you from my memory. Like you never existed.

Porque, deixem-me dizer-vos. Já não sou a rapariga que conheceram. Nem por sombras. Já não sou a rapariga que se coloca em último lugar e ama o seu homem mais do que a si própria. Não, senhor. Agora, as prioridades mudaram, e eu coloco-me em primeiro lugar.

E gosto da rapariga em que me estou a tornar. Gosto da minha nova força, do meu novo poder interior e da minha nova e melhorada perspetiva de vida.

I love how I didn’t let you destroy me for love. I am proud at how brave and strong I’ve stayed, and even though there were some dark times… I am finally rising above them. I am a whole new woman who doesn’t take crap from a weak boy, not anymore.

Your inability to love me the way you should’ve loved me has changed me into the kind of woman who has finally learned to love herself, flaws and all.

E todos estes anos passados contigo não foram mais do que uma dura lição e, sem ela, não teria sido capaz de ser a mulher que sou hoje.

Por isso, da próxima vez que me vires, fica a saber you didn’t break me. Instead, you’ve turned me into a new woman who loves the shit out of  herself, her life, and knows exactly what’s worth fighting for and what isn’t worth her attention.

A minha vida, a minha história. E, a partir de agora, sou a única responsável por a escrever!