Como sair da zona de amizade: 16 métodos que realmente funcionam

I’m pretty sure that you already know the drill.

You hang out, you feel like there’s this special vibe between you two, and you want to move things to the next level, but unfortunately she sees you only as her good friend (if not best friend).

Sooner than you know, you find yourself stuck in the realm called “apenas amigos” and you have no idea how to get out of there.

The more you’re making effort, paying attention to the little things, and trying to flirt with her, the more she’s friend-zoning you.
(Como podem ver, decidi referir-me ao facto de os homens serem vítimas da friend zone porque estes casos são mais frequentes no sexo masculino).

And yes, there are different types of friend zones (and it’s not that we need more variations of them)!

Pode estar preso na zona de amizade emocional ou na zona de amizade sexual.

You know that you’re stuck in an emotional friend zone when you have this amazing bond and share everything with each other, and she feels blessed to have you, but still all she wants from you is to be her close friend.

On the contrary, you know that you’re in the sexual friend zone when you’re being intimate with a girl and that’s pretty much all you do.

Gosta do contacto físico e  o poder de tensão sexual, but romantic interest from her side simply doesn’t exist.
A friend zone sexual tem a ver com o facto de quereres mais do que apenas sexo.

It’s when you want a romantic relationship with romantic feelings that are reciprocal. It’s when you want to be something more than just a fuck buddy or friend with benefits.

Assim, enquanto você quer uma relação real, cheia de sentimentos verdadeiros ou uma relação sexual, tudo o que ela quer é um grande amigo que esteja lá para ela sempre que precisar dele.

But, did you know that women (well, most women) don’t just randomly decide that they will toss you into the friend zone just because you’re a nice guy or they’re in need of a guy friend?

A woman’s (subconscious) decision to put you into the friend zone stems from your words, actions, body language, and even the amount of texting.

Some things that you do (like going out of your way to please her) can be a huge turn off for a woman and that’s when she decides to never see you as anything else than just friends.

Your every move is equally important as your first move and that’s why you should never get too desperate when it comes to letting her know that you’re interested.

Por ficar demasiado desesperado, refiro-me a transformar-se num tipo que faria tudo e mais alguma coisa para que uma rapariga reparasse nele e o visse como um potencial parceiro, quer se trate de uma relação romântica ou sexual.

Porque, por vezes, menos é mais!

If you want to learn how to get out of the friend zone, you need to learn how to attract women like a boss (and I’m not only talking about dating advice on the first date).

Por isso, aqui está a lista de métodos que o ajudarão a sair da friend zone e que o impedirão de lá voltar!

COMO SAIR DA FRIEND ZONE: 16 MÉTODOS QUE REALMENTE FUNCIONAM
1. Accept the fact that you’re being friend-zoned

A lot of times I’ve seen guys behaving like the problem is in the girl and not them.

They aren’t even aware that they’re being friend-zoned in the first place, so they continue hoping that one day this girl they’re so crazy about will wake up and realize what a great man they are and that she was so stupidly blind all this time to realize that.

Deep down in your heart, I know you know that this isn’t true. And you know what they say?

O primeiro passo para lidar com o problema é aceitá-lo!

So, what you need to do is accept the fact that you’re indeed being friend-zoned and nothing will change unless you decide to change the game!

Accept the fact that for some reason(s) she’s seeing you as her friend only, and all your flirty gestures, spending time with only her, or constantly maintaining intense eye contact will simply be in vain. So stop repeating the same drill.

Wake up and realize that the only time something will change is when you accept the fact that you’re being friend-zoned and start doing something about it!

Ver também: 8 sinais alarmantes de que a sua relação está a caminhar para A zona de amizade

2. Deixar de se fazer de vítima e de sentir pena de si próprio

You know what’s even worse than being in the friend zone? It’s when you’re in the friend zone and once you realize it, you start playing the victim or start feeling sorry for yourself.

This includes making her feel bad about friend-zoning you, reminding her of all of your good qualities, reminding her of how ungrateful she is for everything you’ve done for her, and the like.

Nada disto vai alterar a situação. Posso garantir-vos isso. E sabem porquê?

Because women don’t like weak men who perceive rejection as if it’s the end of the world.

They don’t like men who go to extremes only to accentuate how miserable they are just because a woman isn’t into them – just because she’s not into you.

They like men who know what they want, what they’re doing, and how to get what they want. They want men who know como arranjar uma namorada. Por isso, sê esse homem!

Ver também: 16 Sinais óbvios de que o seu amigo homem sente algo por si

3. Parar de ficar obcecado por ela

If you want to learn how to get out of the friend zone, the number one thing you need to do is stop obsessing over her or overanalyzing why she doesn’t considero-te material de namorado! Isto inclui pensar, fantasiar e sonhar acordado com ela numa base diária. 

I know that it’s natural for a human being to start obsessing over someone they’re really into, but it’s not healthy in the long run!

Because this obsessive behavior will lead you to making her your only priority, which is the main reason for many mistakes you’ve probably made so far.

Por isso, em vez de estar constantemente a pensar nela, tem de se concentrar em si próprio!

You need to focus on your life and do things that you enjoy. You need to do it in order to distract your mind from falling into the “eternal friend zone” trap.

The more you enjoy your own life and pay attention to other things apart from only her, the happier you’ll be. And she’ll

also see you as a man who is passionate about life and who knows what he’s doing!

4. Pára de lhe telefonar e de lhe enviar mensagens em excesso

If you send her one text and she doesn’t respond immediately, don’t send another and then another until she finally decides to reply.

And don’t call your mutual friends to ask them about what’s going on in her life and demand reasons why she hasn’t texted or called you yet.

A regra de ouro que nunca se deve esquecer é: Pára de lhe telefonar e de lhe enviar mensagens em excesso!

One or even a few texts per day are okay, but typing her every minute about every single thing that’s happening in your life is absurd.

Also, stop liking and commenting on her every picture on social media like you’re keeping all the tabs of her every profile open only to be the first one to hit the like button.

If you keep doing this, she will keep putting you into the friend zone because she’ll not be attracted to a man who is, let’s say, desperate or obsessed over her.

5. Tornar-se um desafio

Tal como os homens, as mulheres também gostam de homens que sejam desafiantes.

Quero dizer, ninguém gosta de estar com alguém que o coloca constantemente num pedestal e que se esforça constantemente por conquistar a sua atenção, resolver todos os seus problemas e fazer basicamente tudo por ele.

Por isso, em vez de ser esse tipo, precisa de se tornar um homem que é um desafio. E como é que se torna um?

Well, challenging men don’t give their women everything at once. They make an effort, but to a certain extent, and they give their women everything bit by bit.

They don’t suffocate a woman with affection. They give her space to sense the challenge and feel like she’s the one winning him over with her qualities and personality.

Women want to feel special and that’s why they need to know that you’re not just some random guy around the block.

They need to know that you’re a challenge, that you’re a man worthy of being in their life!

Ver também: 13 maneiras simples de excitar uma mulher e deixá-la com vontade

6. Ser misterioso

Um dos aspectos mais importantes a que deve prestar especial atenção é a manutenção do mistério.

Why? Because mystery is your best friend. There isn’t a single woman in the world – or to be more precise, a single human being on earth who doesn’t like the charms of mystery.

We’re all drawn to things we don’t know much about, and therefore, we want to learn more about that certain person or thing.

Se queres sair da friend zone, terás de implementar isto o mais rapidamente possível na tua vida amorosa. Como?

By not telling her everything that’s on your mind, not revealing every single detail about your life, or giving her the information of your whereabouts every single second. Mystery creates desire.

When she sees that you have your own life and Lord knows how many exciting things are happening at the moment, and you’re giving her details bit by bit about everything, she’ll want more.

She’ll want to be with a guy who leaves her wanting more! So be that guy.

7. Dar-lhe a oportunidade de sentir a sua falta

Many people think that if they spend as much time as possible with someone they’re crazy about, they will win their sympathies (or jump into their pants). But, believe it or not, the truth is otherwise!

The more time you spend with her, the more she’ll lose interest in you as a romantic interest and the more you’ll be at risk of her putting you into that cruel friend zone.

And you don’t want that, right? So, what you need to do is give her the opportunity to miss you!

And you’ll do that by not spending all of your free time with her, and by giving her some space and time to think about you and miss you.

You’ll do that by not being there for her 24/7 (unless something’s really important), because they say that people fall in love with another person’s absence and not presence.

8. Deixar de mostrar sinais de ciúmes

I understand the fact that when you really like someone, it’s almost impossible to not show any sign of jealousy when something bothers you about them.

But, it’s exactly what you shouldn’t do, no matter what, if you don’t want to stay forever stuck in the friend zone.

When she’s talking with or about other men, or when you hear people gossiping about her and some peculiar matters, don’t show any sign of jealousy. You really don’t want to be that man.

You don’t want her to see that you can easily get jealous, because this is not an attractive trait to have and it’ll tell her that you’re obsessing over her.

Remember what we said about mystery? You need to let her know that you’re not jealous, whether you’re leading her to believe you’re not that interested in her, or just that you’re a confident man and you have no jealousy issues.

This will make her think hard about the real reason why you’re not jealous like other men usually are. (And perhaps she will try even harder to get close to you so that she finally sees what’s really going on.)

9. Estar calmo e relaxado

Whatever happens, do not act on impulse. Instead, stay calm and relaxed because that will tell her that you’re strong inside, which is a trait of every confident man.

Quer que ela veja que sabe como controlar as suas emoções, um indicador de qualquer homem emocionalmente maduro.

E, acreditem, as mulheres querem estar com homens emocionalmente maduros!

Women can’t help but fall for men who know how to stay calm even in the middle of the hurricane. It tells them that such men are capable, flexible, and always know how to make the best of a situation.

10. Deixar de se esforçar para fazer coisas por ela

Quando ela lhe diz que precisa que alguém lhe compre o verniz das unhas o mais depressa possível para combinar com o vestido, corre imediatamente para a loja e faz isso por ela?

Quando ela diz que precisa de alguém para pintar a casa, transforma-se imediatamente no melhor pintor da cidade?

If yes, then you’ve been doing it all wrong and that’s probably the reason why you ended up being in the friend zone in the first place.

E agora, para sair desta situação, tens de deixar de fazer tudo por ela, por muito que queiras e a desejes.

This doesn’t mean that you should never help her with anything.

It just means that you should go about it moderately, like a gentleman who also has his own life and obligations, and who can’t jump on her every word whenever she wants it.

11. Stop acting like you’re her friend

Uma das maiores razões pelas quais as mulheres tendem a fazer amizade com os homens da friendzone é porque esses homens estão realmente a agir dessa forma para com elas.

They think if they get closer to them, do everything for them (including helping her pick a dress or buy a perfume), they’ll immediately be more interested in something more serious or at least consider them as their future partner in bed or in a relationship.

By acting like you’re her friend, you’re literally telling her that she should see you that way because you’re that kind of guy – an overly friendly kind of guy.

Well, don’t be overly friendly because such guys don’t get laid, Such guys don’t end up being in a relationship.

Em vez disso, seja o homem que é confiante em si mesmo com uma dose de mistério e paixão. Seja o oposto.

12. Stop being a “Yes man”

Whenever she’s talking to you about something that happened recently in her life, do you just politely nod without giving her any feedback or even insight into your opinion regarding the matter?

Whenever she’s proposing a new activity or a new place that you two should visit, do you just say: Yes, we should totally do that!

If that’s the case, then stop being a “yes man” – it’s not bringing you anything good.

Women are attracted to men who aren’t afraid to contradict them when they disagree on something.

As mulheres sentem-se atraídas por homens que sabem quando dizer "não" e se mantêm fiéis a isso.

Men who have their own opinion instead of blindly following other people’s agendas and obeying the rules as if they’re merely a servant.

So, stop being a “yes man” and find the courage to politely say what you really think and be who you really are!

13. Ter cuidado ao revelar os seus sentimentos

If you tell a woman that you’re really crazy about her and you simply can’t help but think about her and her only, she’s going to either run away from you or just put you aside onto the friend zone pile.

Por isso, tenha cuidado ao revelar os seus sentimentos.

You don’t want to scare her off with the amount of your affection for her. You don’t want to overwhelm her with your declarations of love too soon.

Se queres que ela saiba o que sentes, tens de o fazer de forma mais subtil.

Em vez de lhe dizer exatamente o que sente por ela, tente elogiando-a or doing something else that’ll show her you might be interested in her.

But, most importantly, make sure it doesn’t confirm it! When it comes to women, uncertainty is your friend!

14. Trabalhar sobre si próprio

A man who takes care of his body and mind is a man who knows how to take care of himself. That’s why it’s important to constantly work on your self-improvement.

Ir ao ginásio, comer alimentos saudáveis e atingir determinados objectivos na vida.

Working on yourself will tell her that you’re an ambitious man who knows what he wants and how to get it too. (And, trust me, there’s nothing sexier than that!)

15. Elevar os seus padrões

Defina o que realmente quer fazer na vida e mantenha-se fiel a isso. Defina os seus objectivos e sonhos.

Define what is that you really want from a girl, a potential relationship, and the like. And once you define it, don’t settle for anything less.

This will turn you into a powerful man who’s assured in what he’s doing.

Um homem com quem todas as mulheres querem estar! E vai tirar-te definitivamente da friend zone!

16. Aproveitar a vida!

While you’re implementing all the above-mentioned signs into your life, don’t forget to enjoy the process!

Don’t forget to enjoy life because this will help you maintain a positive attitude toward all of life’s challenges and tests.

And it’ll tell her that you sure as hell know how to have fun and that your world is an exciting place to be.

Once she sees that, she will want to be a part of that world. Your world. She’ll want to be with a man who is exciting, confident, mysterious, and relaxed.

She’ll want to be with a man who is neither overly friendly nor overly distant. A man who knows how to atrair uma mulher.

She’ll want to be with you!

Ver também: As 15 melhores dicas sobre como seduzir a rapariga que quiser