Come uscire dalla zona amicizia: 16 metodi che funzionano davvero

I’m pretty sure that you already know the drill.

You hang out, you feel like there’s this special vibe between you two, and you want to move things to the next level, but unfortunately she sees you only as her good friend (if not best friend).

Sooner than you know, you find yourself stuck in the realm called “solo amici” and you have no idea how to get out of there.

The more you’re making effort, paying attention to the little things, and trying to flirt with her, the more she’s friend-zoning you.
(Come potete vedere, ho deciso di riferirmi ai maschi che sono vittime della friendzone perché questi casi sono più frequenti nei maschi).

And yes, there are different types of friend zones (and it’s not that we need more variations of them)!

Si può essere bloccati nella zona dell'amicizia emotiva o in quella sessuale.

You know that you’re stuck in an emotional friend zone when you have this amazing bond and share everything with each other, and she feels blessed to have you, but still all she wants from you is to be her close friend.

On the contrary, you know that you’re in the sexual friend zone when you’re being intimate with a girl and that’s pretty much all you do.

Vi piace il contatto fisico e  il potere di tensione sessuale, but romantic interest from her side simply doesn’t exist.
La zona di amicizia sessuale riguarda il desiderio di qualcosa di più del semplice sesso.

It’s when you want a romantic relationship with romantic feelings that are reciprocal. It’s when you want to be something more than just a fuck buddy or friend with benefits.

Quindi, mentre voi volete una relazione vera e propria piena di sentimenti o una relazione sessuale, tutto ciò che lei vuole è un grande amico che sia presente per lei ogni volta che ne ha bisogno.

But, did you know that women (well, most women) don’t just randomly decide that they will toss you into the friend zone just because you’re a nice guy or they’re in need of a guy friend?

A woman’s (subconscious) decision to put you into the friend zone stems from your words, actions, body language, and even the amount of texting.

Some things that you do (like going out of your way to please her) can be a huge turn off for a woman and that’s when she decides to never see you as anything else than just friends.

Your every move is equally important as your first move and that’s why you should never get too desperate when it comes to letting her know that you’re interested.

Per disperazione intendo la trasformazione in un ragazzo che farebbe di tutto e di più perché una ragazza lo notasse e lo vedesse come un potenziale partner, che si tratti di una relazione romantica o sessuale.

Perché a volte meno è meglio!

If you want to learn how to get out of the friend zone, you need to learn how to attract women like a boss (and I’m not only talking about dating advice on the first date).

Ecco quindi un elenco di metodi che vi aiuteranno a uscire dalla zona amicizia e vi impediranno di tornarci!

COME USCIRE DALLA ZONA AMICIZIA: 16 METODI CHE FUNZIONANO DAVVERO
1. Accept the fact that you’re being friend-zoned

A lot of times I’ve seen guys behaving like the problem is in the girl and not them.

They aren’t even aware that they’re being friend-zoned in the first place, so they continue hoping that one day this girl they’re so crazy about will wake up and realize what a great man they are and that she was so stupidly blind all this time to realize that.

Deep down in your heart, I know you know that this isn’t true. And you know what they say?

Il primo passo per affrontare il problema è accettarlo!

So, what you need to do is accept the fact that you’re indeed being friend-zoned and nothing will change unless you decide to change the game!

Accept the fact that for some reason(s) she’s seeing you as her friend only, and all your flirty gestures, spending time with only her, or constantly maintaining intense eye contact will simply be in vain. So stop repeating the same drill.

Wake up and realize that the only time something will change is when you accept the fact that you’re being friend-zoned and start doing something about it!

Vedi anche: 8 segni allarmanti che la vostra relazione si sta dirigendo verso la La zona dell'amicizia

2. Smettere di fare la vittima e di autocommiserarsi

You know what’s even worse than being in the friend zone? It’s when you’re in the friend zone and once you realize it, you start playing the victim or start feeling sorry for yourself.

This includes making her feel bad about friend-zoning you, reminding her of all of your good qualities, reminding her of how ungrateful she is for everything you’ve done for her, and the like.

Niente di tutto questo cambierà la situazione. Ve lo posso garantire. E sapete perché?

Because women don’t like weak men who perceive rejection as if it’s the end of the world.

They don’t like men who go to extremes only to accentuate how miserable they are just because a woman isn’t into them – just because she’s not into you.

They like men who know what they want, what they’re doing, and how to get what they want. They want men who know come ottenere una ragazza. Quindi, siate quell'uomo!

Vedi anche: 16 segni evidenti che il tuo amico maschio prova qualcosa per te

3. Smettere di essere ossessionati da lei

If you want to learn how to get out of the friend zone, the number one thing you need to do is stop obsessing over her or overanalyzing why she doesn’t ti considero materiale da fidanzato! Questo include pensare, fantasticare e sognare ad occhi aperti su di lei ogni giorno. 

I know that it’s natural for a human being to start obsessing over someone they’re really into, but it’s not healthy in the long run!

Because this obsessive behavior will lead you to making her your only priority, which is the main reason for many mistakes you’ve probably made so far.

Quindi, invece di pensare costantemente a lei, devi concentrarti su te stesso!

You need to focus on your life and do things that you enjoy. You need to do it in order to distract your mind from falling into the “eternal friend zone” trap.

The more you enjoy your own life and pay attention to other things apart from only her, the happier you’ll be. And she’ll

also see you as a man who is passionate about life and who knows what he’s doing!

4. Smettere di chiamarla e mandarle messaggi

If you send her one text and she doesn’t respond immediately, don’t send another and then another until she finally decides to reply.

And don’t call your mutual friends to ask them about what’s going on in her life and demand reasons why she hasn’t texted or called you yet.

La regola d'oro da non dimenticare mai è: Smettila di chiamarla e di mandarle messaggi!

One or even a few texts per day are okay, but typing her every minute about every single thing that’s happening in your life is absurd.

Also, stop liking and commenting on her every picture on social media like you’re keeping all the tabs of her every profile open only to be the first one to hit the like button.

If you keep doing this, she will keep putting you into the friend zone because she’ll not be attracted to a man who is, let’s say, desperate or obsessed over her.

5. Diventare stimolante

Proprio come gli uomini, anche le donne amano i ragazzi impegnativi.

Voglio dire, a nessuno piace stare con qualcuno che lo mette costantemente su un piedistallo e si fa in quattro per attirare la sua attenzione, risolvere ogni suo problema e fare praticamente tutto per lui.

Quindi, invece di essere quel tipo di uomo, dovete diventare un uomo che rappresenta una sfida. E come si fa a diventarlo?

Well, challenging men don’t give their women everything at once. They make an effort, but to a certain extent, and they give their women everything bit by bit.

They don’t suffocate a woman with affection. They give her space to sense the challenge and feel like she’s the one winning him over with her qualities and personality.

Women want to feel special and that’s why they need to know that you’re not just some random guy around the block.

They need to know that you’re a challenge, that you’re a man worthy of being in their life!

Vedi anche: 13 semplici modi per eccitare una donna e metterla in vena di emozioni

6. Essere misteriosi

Una delle cose più importanti a cui prestare particolare attenzione è la manutenzione del mistero.

Why? Because mystery is your best friend. There isn’t a single woman in the world – or to be more precise, a single human being on earth who doesn’t like the charms of mystery.

We’re all drawn to things we don’t know much about, and therefore, we want to learn more about that certain person or thing.

Se volete uscire dalla zona amicizia, dovrete implementare questo principio il prima possibile nella vostra vita sentimentale. Come?

By not telling her everything that’s on your mind, not revealing every single detail about your life, or giving her the information of your whereabouts every single second. Mystery creates desire.

When she sees that you have your own life and Lord knows how many exciting things are happening at the moment, and you’re giving her details bit by bit about everything, she’ll want more.

She’ll want to be with a guy who leaves her wanting more! So be that guy.

7. Datele l'opportunità di sentire la vostra mancanza

Many people think that if they spend as much time as possible with someone they’re crazy about, they will win their sympathies (or jump into their pants). But, believe it or not, the truth is otherwise!

The more time you spend with her, the more she’ll lose interest in you as a romantic interest and the more you’ll be at risk of her putting you into that cruel friend zone.

And you don’t want that, right? So, what you need to do is give her the opportunity to miss you!

And you’ll do that by not spending all of your free time with her, and by giving her some space and time to think about you and miss you.

You’ll do that by not being there for her 24/7 (unless something’s really important), because they say that people fall in love with another person’s absence and not presence.

8. Smettere di mostrare segni di gelosia

I understand the fact that when you really like someone, it’s almost impossible to not show any sign of jealousy when something bothers you about them.

But, it’s exactly what you shouldn’t do, no matter what, if you don’t want to stay forever stuck in the friend zone.

When she’s talking with or about other men, or when you hear people gossiping about her and some peculiar matters, don’t show any sign of jealousy. You really don’t want to be that man.

You don’t want her to see that you can easily get jealous, because this is not an attractive trait to have and it’ll tell her that you’re obsessing over her.

Remember what we said about mystery? You need to let her know that you’re not jealous, whether you’re leading her to believe you’re not that interested in her, or just that you’re a confident man and you have no jealousy issues.

This will make her think hard about the real reason why you’re not jealous like other men usually are. (And perhaps she will try even harder to get close to you so that she finally sees what’s really going on.)

9. Essere calmi e rilassati

Whatever happens, do not act on impulse. Instead, stay calm and relaxed because that will tell her that you’re strong inside, which is a trait of every confident man.

Volete che veda che sapete controllare le vostre emozioni, un indicatore di ogni uomo emotivamente maturo.

E, credetemi, le donne vogliono stare con uomini emotivamente maturi!

Women can’t help but fall for men who know how to stay calm even in the middle of the hurricane. It tells them that such men are capable, flexible, and always know how to make the best of a situation.

10. Smettere di fare di tutto per lei

Quando vi dice che ha bisogno di qualcuno che le compri lo smalto il prima possibile per abbinarlo al suo vestito, correte subito al negozio e lo fate per lei?

Quando lei dice che ha bisogno di qualcuno che dipinga la sua casa, vi trasformate immediatamente nel miglior imbianchino della città?

If yes, then you’ve been doing it all wrong and that’s probably the reason why you ended up being in the friend zone in the first place.

E ora, per uscirne, devi smetterla di darti da fare per lei, per quanto tu lo voglia e la desideri.

This doesn’t mean that you should never help her with anything.

It just means that you should go about it moderately, like a gentleman who also has his own life and obligations, and who can’t jump on her every word whenever she wants it.

11. Stop acting like you’re her friend

Uno dei motivi principali per cui le donne tendono a fare amicizia con gli uomini è che questi ultimi si comportano effettivamente così nei loro confronti.

They think if they get closer to them, do everything for them (including helping her pick a dress or buy a perfume), they’ll immediately be more interested in something more serious or at least consider them as their future partner in bed or in a relationship.

By acting like you’re her friend, you’re literally telling her that she should see you that way because you’re that kind of guy – an overly friendly kind of guy.

Well, don’t be overly friendly because such guys don’t get laid, Such guys don’t end up being in a relationship.

Siate invece l'uomo sicuro di sé con una dose di mistero e passione. Siate l'opposto.

12. Stop being a “Yes man”

Whenever she’s talking to you about something that happened recently in her life, do you just politely nod without giving her any feedback or even insight into your opinion regarding the matter?

Whenever she’s proposing a new activity or a new place that you two should visit, do you just say: Yes, we should totally do that!

If that’s the case, then stop being a “yes man” – it’s not bringing you anything good.

Women are attracted to men who aren’t afraid to contradict them when they disagree on something.

Le donne sono attratte dagli uomini che sanno quando dire no e mantenerlo.

Men who have their own opinion instead of blindly following other people’s agendas and obeying the rules as if they’re merely a servant.

So, stop being a “yes man” and find the courage to politely say what you really think and be who you really are!

13. Fare attenzione a rivelare i propri sentimenti

If you tell a woman that you’re really crazy about her and you simply can’t help but think about her and her only, she’s going to either run away from you or just put you aside onto the friend zone pile.

Quindi, fate attenzione a rivelare i vostri sentimenti.

You don’t want to scare her off with the amount of your affection for her. You don’t want to overwhelm her with your declarations of love too soon.

Se vuoi farle sapere come ti senti, devi farlo in modo più sottile.

Invece di dirle esattamente cosa provate per lei, provate a complimentarsi con lei or doing something else that’ll show her you might be interested in her.

But, most importantly, make sure it doesn’t confirm it! When it comes to women, uncertainty is your friend!

14. Lavorare su se stessi

A man who takes care of his body and mind is a man who knows how to take care of himself. That’s why it’s important to constantly work on your self-improvement.

Andare in palestra, mangiare sano e raggiungere determinati obiettivi nella vita.

Working on yourself will tell her that you’re an ambitious man who knows what he wants and how to get it too. (And, trust me, there’s nothing sexier than that!)

15. Elevare i propri standard

Definite ciò che volete veramente fare nella vita e attenetevi ad esso. Definite i vostri obiettivi e i vostri sogni.

Define what is that you really want from a girl, a potential relationship, and the like. And once you define it, don’t settle for anything less.

This will turn you into a powerful man who’s assured in what he’s doing.

Un uomo con cui ogni donna vorrebbe stare! E vi farà sicuramente uscire dalla zona amicizia!

16. Godetevi la vita!

While you’re implementing all the above-mentioned signs into your life, don’t forget to enjoy the process!

Don’t forget to enjoy life because this will help you maintain a positive attitude toward all of life’s challenges and tests.

And it’ll tell her that you sure as hell know how to have fun and that your world is an exciting place to be.

Once she sees that, she will want to be a part of that world. Your world. She’ll want to be with a man who is exciting, confident, mysterious, and relaxed.

She’ll want to be with a man who is neither overly friendly nor overly distant. A man who knows how to attrarre una donna.

She’ll want to be with you!

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