Sente-se inseguro em relação ao casamento? 7 prós e contras para descobrir

These days, marriage has become a real debate in which everyone has their own opinions on who is a “real candidate” for it and who should not get married due to some assumptions or prejudice. But, not in my case.

For some unknown reasons, I’ve always felt unsure about marriage and never was one hundred percent for or against it.

Costumávamos falar muito sobre o assunto e, por vezes, estávamos de acordo, mas outras vezes as nossas opiniões colidiam e um de nós era totalmente contra.

So, I’ve figured it out that the only way to find the right answer is to create a list of pros and cons that will help us decide.

And, believe me, it did help us. And if you’re having the same dilemmas as we did, I warmly recommend to read the following list of pros and cons of marriage to figure things out.

7 PRÓS E 7 CONTRAS DO CASAMENTO

OS CONS

You’re influenced by others’ expectations and rules

Getting married is not just saying: “Yes, I do” to the o amor da sua vida e depois viver felizes para sempre.

There are also some annoying legalities you need to deal with once you’re in marriage waters. You are no longer left to your own decisions.

Os seus planos e as suas poupanças influenciam diretamente os planos e as poupanças do seu parceiro, pelo que será sempre necessário ter em conta vastos factores e assinar numerosos documentos para apaziguar os aspectos legais.

When you’re single, you don’t have to think about things like this which are in most of the cases draining as hell.

O casamento parece ultrapassado

O casamento perdeu os seus encantos em geral. Antes era algo que todos os casais faziam sem pensar duas vezes por causa das pressões da sociedade, da segurança financeira ou das semelhanças. E hoje temos uma imagem diferente do casamento.

Somos livres de viver com o nosso namorado ou namorada sem sermos julgados por isso ou pressionados pelos outros a casar, o que é fantástico.

So, why would we rush things if we don’t have to yet? The decision to live together as a couple sounds pretty inviting. As a matter of fact, it’s the same thing as being married, only that you haven’t signed anything.

Os casamentos são um verdadeiro encargo financeiro

A preparação de um casamento pode ser uma verdadeira provação financeira. Aqueles que já passaram por isso podem confirmá-lo com toda a certeza. Para além do seu trabalho e de outras coisas que faz atualmente na vida, terá de reservar um espaço no seu orçamento para a preparação de um casamento.

And if you’ve always had pictures in your head of your perfect wedding day, you will have to do everything in your power to make it come true.

If your current finances can’t support your wishes, you will not be content and your wedding would turn into a disappointment.

A taxa de divórcio aumentou significativamente

And it is still increasing. There’s this epidemic of divorced couples, single moms and single dads and I’m sure you already know a few of them in your circle of friends and family.

While it doesn’t have to mean that you’ll end up being divorced, there is still some percentage proving that you might.

If your guts are telling you that you’re not ready yet or if your partner might not be the best marriage material, it is better to wait until you have better insight and perspective on how thinally are.

A fobia de compromisso é uma verdadeira luta

Choosing one person for the rest of your life sounds a little bit scary, right? It is like going to a chocolate factory where you’re “forced” to choose only one type of chocolate that you’ll be eating till the rest of your life.

Are you capable of doing that? Are you capable of discarding all of the other flavors to devote all of yourself to the one you’ve chosen? If not, you know what you ought to do because commitment phobia is not something you should dar por garantido.

O casamento pode mudar a forma como as coisas são

Sometimes marriage can influence your happiness and change the good you’ve had before while you were unmarried.

For example, married people have this tendency to relax a little bit too much than they should because now they’re married, and it’s the end of the story.

So, sometimes they forget to fight for their partners and work on themselves because they think that they should be accepted as they are because they’ve signed the sacred “contract” of loving each other at their good and bad (which comes as a perfect excuse).

Ver também: A lista definitiva de prós e contras de um relacionamento que funciona

As perguntas sobre ter filhos são intermináveis

So, let’s say that you’ve decided to get married, but you still don’t want children or you haven’t even thought about having them. Now, how will you explain this to all of these people who will constantly keep bombarding you with questions regarding your future offspring?

I’m sure you already have a few of them in mind who might fit the role of being “a pain in the ass” and who keep living other people’s lives and worrying about what they certainly shouldn’t.

OS PRÓS

1. As outras pessoas compreenderão melhor o seu estado de relacionamento

Your relationship status will no longer be the biggest enigma the world has seen or to be exact your grandma and grandpa who still can’t deal with how things function today.

You will no longer have to think of what to say before introducing yourself and your partner to others because now you will know exactly what to say proudly and out loud: “I’m her/his husband/wife”.

2. Recebe um seguro e subsídios fiscais

Pode não ser a coisa mais apropriada para pensar nesta situação, mas ser casado também tem os seus benefícios financeiros.

So, if you’ve always thought about making some changes in life but couldn’t afford it, when you get married these will be much easier for you to accomplish when your budget is improved.

3. Com os vossos novos rótulos de marido e mulher, adquirem novos papéis na vida

During our lives, we go through different roles from being a daughter/son, sister/brother, granddaughter/grandson and now you’re about to become someone’s wife or husband!

Hooray!! Doesn’t it sound exciting to proudly share your new labels with the rest of the world?

Doesn’t it sound exciting to share your love with the rest of the world? It surely does because it is one of the most beautiful roles one could have during his lifetime, so think about it.

4. Se tiveres a oportunidade de escolher casar com o amor da tua vida, aproveita-a

Antigamente, as pessoas eram massivamente forçadas a entrar num casamento arranjado e a seguir as regras tradicionais da sua família ou crenças (e isso ainda hoje acontece, mas em menor número). Hoje, somos quase sempre livres de escolher casar com os amores das nossas vidas, por isso, porque não aproveitar a oportunidade para o fazer?

Por que não deixar florescer o amor que continuamos a ter no nosso coração por outro ser humano?

Muitos daqueles que foram/são forçados a casar com alguém por outras razões que não o amor teriam matado se tivessem a oportunidade de o fazer de outra forma. Por isso, sejam sensatos e estejam gratos.

5. Planear um casamento é criativo e muito divertido

Planear um casamento é a desculpa perfeita para ser loucamente criativo e tentar fazer o impossível.

Desde balões, confettis a diferentes flores bonitas em milhares de cores e muito mais, pode escolher o aspeto do seu dia perfeito.

You have the opportunity to make it a real fairy tale (if that’s what you always wanted) and you have the opportunity to have lots of fun while doing it.

Especially if you’re a creative maniac, now is the perfect time to shine.

6. Dá-lhe a oportunidade de elogiar a sua relação

I believe that every relationship deserves to be crowned at some point because five years or more spent together definitely deserve a special celebration. All of these hardships you’ve survived together, all of these happy moments, kisses, tears deserve to be praised by a celebration called marriage.

It is a perfect opportunity to say to the world and to yourselves that you’ve gone through a lot, you’re still together, you still amam-se uns aos outros no matter what. It’s just beautiful.

7. Se no fundo do teu coração queres mesmo isso, porque não?

If you can’t think of any specific reason why not and you’re still having second thoughts about it, then ask yourself why not? If deep down in your heart you know you really want to do it, but you somehow keep making excuses not to do it, then just do it.

After all, you only live once, and if you’re sure that you’ve found the love of your life, someone who will be there for you in your bad and at your good, someone who will share joy and tears with you, then do not wait.

Enjoy the moment of saying: “Yes, I do” and becoming someone’s friend, lover, and life companion just as I did myself (and I didn’t regret it).