Las 8 cosas más comunes que dice si te está manipulando
1. “It isn’t a big deal.”
Nunca ve a qué viene tanto alboroto, por qué estás enfadada o cómo te han perjudicado sus actos. Lo único que le interesa es liberarse de la culpa de haberte tratado mal.
La verdad es que nadie puede decirte cómo debes sentirte en determinados momentos. Si te ha hecho daño, debería ponerse en tu lugar y pensar cómo se sentiría si las cosas fueran al revés.
2. “You are being too emotional.”
Your relationship should make you feel comfortable enough to express your emotions; however, he fails to realize that he made you upset or sad. He doesn’t want to see or hear you cry.
Busca un culpable y siente placer al ver tus emociones exageradas, en lugar de enfrentarse al hecho de que él es la razón de que te sientas así.
It’s easier than reassuring you that everything is OK, or – God forbid – apologize for something he has done.
3. “You must have heard it wrong, I never said that.”
He will basically make you question your sanity. He will deny his own words up to the point where you perhaps start to think “Maybe I actually heard it wrong.”
No, there’s nothing wrong with your hearing or your memory, you are simply emocionalmente agotado and are letting things slide because you can’t ponder over them forever.
Esta es su forma de mantener el control sobre ti y tergiversar la realidad. ¡Sólo empeora con el tiempo!
4. “Why can’t you trust me for once?”
If he is the sole cause and responsible for your trust issues, if he lied, cheated or betrayed you in any way, why is he so surprised that you don’t trust him?
Broken trust is not something that can be mended overnight. To be honest, it’s difficult to ever repair it.
But he is not working on gaining your trust. It’s easier to shift the focus on you and your lack of trust, instead of putting in actual effort to prove and show you that he has changed.
5. “It seems like I can’t do anything right.”
Hacerse la víctima es una de las tácticas de manipulación más utilizadas por las personas tóxicas. Saben que eres empático y que tarde o temprano empezarás a sentir lástima por ellos.
Te oirás a ti mismo disculpándote, incluso cuando sabes que tienes razón, porque te ha hecho sentir que no estás siendo razonable y le haces sentir mal.
Te hará sentir que eres una mala persona en esas situaciones, mientras que él es inocente en todo esto.
6. “You did the same exact thing.”
When he does something he knows he never should – texting his ex, saying that he had been some place when he hadn’t or lie, he will remember that offense is the best defense.
Jugará un juego de culpar. Recordará y amplificará cada error tuyo del pasado.
Equiparará que tu ex te desee un feliz cumpleaños con que él le mande mensajes a su ex durante meses, o tu mentira piadosa con alguna de sus notorias mentiras.
7. “I didn’t lie, I just didn’t tell you. It must have slipped off my mind.”
Withholding the truth, especially when it’s something important is as good as telling lies.
He will defend himself by telling you that he told you all about a particular thing, when you asked and for him, it wasn’t so important and the matter slipped from his mind and so on.
The bottom line is if he hasn’t told you something that directly affects your relationship, he is to blame. He will attempt to manipulate you into thinking he isn’t.
8. “I’m going to bed.”
He has no problem falling asleep during the middle of an argument. You might be upset, crying or asking him questions – but he doesn’t care!
He knows very well that you won’t be able to fall asleep and twill probably think about all that has happened during the entire night.
You will be unable to function properly in the morning while he will be well-rested. He knows you won’t be able to spend more energy to continue an argument and that things will, in all probability, be left unresolved permanently.
El chico adecuado te tranquilizaría y encontraría una solución a tu problema, en lugar de pasarse al otro bando y mostrar sólo lo poco que le importas.
