8 cosas para las que debes estar preparada cuando salgas con un chico mayor
El amor es un verdadero milagro. Nunca puedes saber a quién vas a conocer mañana o quién va a capturar tu corazón y hacerte sonreír con la sensación de mariposas en el estómago.
Love can be uplifting, disappointing, unrequited or real. But, one thing is for sure. You can never choose the person with whom you’re going to fall in love with. It might be someone of your years, younger than you or rather, older than you.
And there’s absolutely nothing wrong with dating an older guy because every difference between the two of you has its charms. And it also has its ups and downs as well as any other relationship.
Si te sientes cómoda saliendo con un chico mayor, deberías seguir tu intuición y hacer lo que te haga feliz.
Recuerdo a una chica que era realmente en un tipo mayor and that was really surprising because all this time she had been saying that she’ll never be with someone who is much older than her.
Pero, de alguna manera mágica sucedió que ella se enamoró with that guy, and at first, she didn’t want to admit it to herself because it would mean that she’s contradicting everything she’s been claiming all this time.
So, she forced herself to ignore him from time to time, and she was constantly sending him mixed signals. And the guy, of course, couldn’t follow her anymore, and he decided to give up on her.
Sadly, till this day, this girl is still grieving for the lost chance and perhaps the love of her life just because she was too stubborn to reject the prejudice of being with an older guy. If you’re having similar doubts regarding an older guy you really like, learn from this girl’s mistake.
Don’t let yourself lose the opportunity to be happy just because you’ve imagined that you should be with someone who is younger.
Catherine Zeta-Jones and Demi Moore are perfect examples of this. They could have had partners ten times younger if they had wanted to, but they don’t give a fuck what others will think of them. And that is how you should behave, too. You should never force yourself to quit on something that makes you happy.
Así que, cuando decidas que quieres salir con un chico mayor, debes saber que será una experiencia única en sí misma, y también debes prestar atención a las siguientes 8 cosas para las que debes estar preparada.
8 cosas para las que debes estar preparada cuando salgas con un chico mayor
1. Sus hijos
Lo primero para lo que tienes que estar preparada es para sus hijos (si los tiene), y lo más probable es que la mayoría de ellos hayan tenido hijos antes de que llegaras tú. Por eso, a veces sus prioridades pueden cambiar drásticamente.
He might shower you with love and affection, but he will always have in his mind that his children need the same amount of affection he’s giving to you. Sometimes his children will steal him from you when you need him most, and there’s nothing you can do about it. You can either be comfortable with it or you can be out of it, but there’s no gray area here.
Another issue that is also important is your potential children. Have you thought about having children with him? Do you think that he would want to have more children? Is he capable of becoming a father again? You need to understand that your vision of your potential motherhood will be greatly influenced by your older partner. And if you’re perfectly satisfied with his perspective on this, there’s no need to worry.
2. Su perspectiva vital
An older guy has obviously more life experience than you in most aspects. And that is why they already have a settled, firm life perspective which is almost impossible to be altered. What if you don’t accept that perspective?
If you’re considering dating an older guy, you should never enter into a relationship, thinking that you’re going para cambiarlo. That is not true. And if you want to change him immediately, it means you’re not that into him because if you were, you wouldn’t want to change him in the first place.
Cambiar significa sustituir su perspectiva vital por la tuya, y hacer esto es algo peligroso. Podría enfadarse y decepcionarse contigo aunque tus intenciones sean totalmente buenas. Aprende siempre todo lo posible sobre un chico mayor antes de entablar cualquier tipo de relación con él porque esto te ahorrará nervios y tiempo.
Once you know what you’re entering, it will be easier to adapt and maintain your relationship. You need to let his life perspective be your compass that will teach you a lot about life facts you haven’t learned yet.
3. Sus preferencias
If you decide to date an older guy, you need to be aware of the fact that your preferences may collide with his. He might be into some old Netflix series, while you’re into some new and modern ones.
It is of utmost importance to be flexible in a situation like this because your older guy will not be that comfortable with giving up things he’s been practicing long before you entered his life.
When it comes to going to the movies, it will be almost impossible to pick something both of you like except when the two of you have similar tastes regarding movie genres. And sometimes you will have to accept that your guy has gone somewhere without you just because he knows you’re not into something he prefers.
In that situation, you need to stay calm and not take it to heart because he’s subtly trying to tell you that he understands and respects that the two of you have different tastes in different things. You need to be ready to compromise and respect his preferences just as he’ll respect yours.
4. Su salud
We all know that the older you are, the higher the risks that you’re going to get health problems. Your guy might be in perfect condition at the time you met him, but this doesn’t mean that things will not eventually change.
As your guy gets older, he will need to take special care of himself in order to prevent potential health problems. But, there are some inevitable health issues that strike people at a certain age, and there’s nothing you can do about it except accept it.
His health will influence your well being as well, and you need to be ready for the sleepless nights that are awaiting you and to be there for him when he needs you. Sometimes his health will prevent you from enjoying things you thought he’ll be capable of enjoying.
But, if you’re really into him and you’re ready to face any kind of an obstacle regarding his potential health problems, you’ll be just fine. You just need to be prepared for what is about to come in order to stay collected and avoid panicking or even worse, regretting dating him in the first place.
5. Su deseo sexual
You need to be aware of the fact that your older guy might have a lower sex drive. Sometimes this can be a real issue if you’re a woman of action (if you know what I mean). But, there are also some benefits regarding his sexuality, and that is experience.
En chicos jóvenes have higher sex drives, your older guy will have more experience which automatically makes him great in bed. He will know how to satisfy your every need, and you will not have to tell him what he’s supposed to do in order for you to reach a climax.
As you can see, there are always some pros and cons, and if you can accept them, you’ll be more than happy in the upcoming days spent with him. Also, you need to understand that you can’t blame him if he simply doesn’t want to have sex as often as you prefer because it’s something he can’t really influence.
Aunque su deseo sexual también puede cambiar con el tiempo, lo único que debes hacer es mantenerte paciente y disfrutar todo lo que puedas de la mano de un hombre mayor experimentado que te muestre la esencia del sexo.
6. Sus hábitos
Another thing that you should pay attention to is his habits. We all have our unique habits that we’ve acquired during the years, and once you acquire something for life, it is hard to get rid of it.
Es probable que tu chico mayor tenga algunas costumbres raras, como guardar ciertas cosas de una determinada manera o comer algo de una determinada forma, etc. Debes entender que sus hábitos forman parte de su rutina y que cambiarlos será casi imposible.
Compromiso requieren mucho esfuerzo, and if the two of you succeed in it, there will still be this feeling of dissatisfaction because all of a sudden, both of you need to change your routines and give up on something you’ve been doing this whole time.
La mejor solución es aceptarle tal y como es y esperar lo mismo de él, porque si sigues insistiendo en que cambie, no harás más que empeorar las cosas, y sus hábitos seguirán siendo los mismos.
7. Sus compromisos financieros
Sus compromisos financieros también serán distintos de los tuyos, porque cuanto mayor eres, más en serio te tomas tus ingresos. A veces, tus expectativas se verán confrontadas por su diferente mentalidad respecto a los compromisos financieros.
Mientras tú esperas que se vaya de viaje a algún sitio, él puede estar pensando en dar ese dinero a sus hijos o a alguna otra cosa que sea más prioritaria para él. No lo hará a propósito, pero su mentalidad le dirá que es lo correcto.
Por ejemplo, no puedes esperar que gaste su dinero en algo lujoso cuando su deseo es destinar el dinero a una pensión y salvaguardar su futuro. Sus compromisos financieros variarán de un día para otro, y tienes que estar dispuesto a transigir.
8. Su voluntad de disfrutar de cosas nuevas
Salir con un chico mayor suele significar decir adiós a esos viajes espontáneos que solíais disfrutar antes. Tienes que saber que tu chico probablemente ya ha experimentado casi todo lo que hay que experimentar, y sus ganas de disfrutar de cosas nuevas irán disminuyendo poco a poco con el tiempo.
You cannot expect that he will be all joyful about some new hobby or sport that you’ve just discovered. While it may seem interesting to you, his interest will most probably not follow yours.
The age difference is the main culprit of this, but it doesn’t have to be so if you’re more of a vintage type of a person. His job, his children and all of the other things that are parts of his life will take a lot of his time, and his will to enjoy new things and be casual will be changed significantly.
He will no longer find himself suitable to go partying all night because his attention will be directed to something else most of the time. But, if you’re okay with that type of lifestyle, I’m sure you’ll be having the time of your life with your older guy.
