Por qué me cuesta tanto dejarlo

Dejar a alguien siempre conlleva una montaña rusa de emociones. Llevaba mucho tiempo en una relación y me había dado cuenta de que era hora de pasar página, pero dar ese último paso fue una experiencia dolorosa.

I was asking myself: “¿Cómo puedo dejar a alguien a quien amo? How can I escape from all those emotions that are constantly following me? Is there a secret formula to get over a breakup?”

A lot of people would like to know an answer to this question but in the end, there isn’t any clever solution. For me, the only solution was to listen to my heart. I wasn’t satisfied in the relationship and I decided it was better to move on. The worst thing I could do to myself was stay in a toxic relationship. I wouldn’t love my partner and he wouldn’t love me.

So, what’s the point? Is it so hard to say goodbye and try to find your own way?

I was asking myself the same question a year ago. When things weren’t the same anymore. When dejó de preocuparse por mí. Y entonces me di cuenta de que, aunque sea difícil volver a empezar, al final valdrá la pena. Probablemente todos hayáis tenido alguna experiencia agridulce en vuestra vida y tomar una decisión acertada en el momento oportuno podría salvaros de las lágrimas.

Véase también: 9 cosas que deberías hacer tras una ruptura para levantarte y seguir adelante

Probablemente estarás destrozado y tu mundo se desmoronará como el mío. Pasarás días enteros en tu habitación pensando en todos esos momentos divertidos que vivisteis. Pensarás que te está llamando cada vez que oigas sonar tu teléfono. Y sinceramente, ¡eso apesta! Es curioso cómo nos volvemos adictos a ciertas personas en nuestra vida. Sé que yo lo hice.

Pasar todos los días con ellos no es sólo algo que hacemos, se convierte en nuestro estilo de vida, y querida, es muy difícil deshacerse de los viejos hábitos. Pero bueno, si lo miras desde el otro ángulo verás que es mejor hacer algo tarde que nunca.

Personas pasar mucho tiempo en malas relaciones and it is not because they want to—it is because they don’t have guts to say the game is over. For them, it is easier to go with the flow. Why be with someone you feel like a piece of shit with? There are millions of other opportunities for you and yet you are stuck in the middle and can’t get out.

Well, do something about it. Be energetic about your life. Do things that make you happy. If you know how to please yourself, you will know how to please others as well. Only a fulfilled person is a happy person. Please don’t forget that.

Era malo cuando era soltera pero entonces me vino a la mente que a veces es mejor estar solo que mal acompañado. I knew my heart will tell me who the right person is for me. Maybe I was waiting a little bit longer but I wasn’t worried that I won’t get what I want. I had to wait because I deserved better!

So, if you ever feel that you are not YOU anymore, try to talk with your partner. Go over the problems you have. Talk and listen! Don’t be selfish and don’t think about your feelings only. Try to figure out who is guilty in this relationship.

Who lost interest? Why isn’t there your old spark that was moving things forward? While talking, you will figure out whether the two of you want the same things.

Si la respuesta es afirmativa, estupendo, y si es negativa, no es el fin del mundo. ¡Nunca llores sobre la leche derramada!
The bottom line is that you don’t need to change yourself because of your partner. Make a change in your life when you feel the right moment for that. And never let anyone convince you of the opposite! That’s what I did.

I was honest to myself and to my partner and accepted the fact that we weren’t meant to have our story in this time and place. Just remember that destiny will never close one door until another one gets opened!
(It’s not so bitchy after all!)