Cómo reconocer (y tratar) a un hombre emocionalmente indisponible

Haces un gran esfuerzo, tienes mucha paciencia y te esfuerzas por sacar lo mejor de tu noviazgo o de tu relación.

But, no matter what you do or say, you end up feeling like you’re dating or being in a relationship with a wall.

Have you ever felt like this? If yes, then chances are you’re dealing with an emotionally unavailable man.

Ahora, la pregunta es: ¿Cómo ha llegado a ser tan difícil emocionalmente estar con un hombre? I’m not saying that every single man on earth is emotionally “damaged”, but the vast majority of them is, and that’s the real enigma.

Por lo general, la razón principal por la que los hombres se convierten en criaturas emocionalmente inaccesibles se debe a relaciones tóxicas pasadas en las que resultaron heridos de un modo u otro.

Wait… does that mean that we women are guilty of making them so? I don’t think so.

También hay muchos otros factores que influyen en que los hombres se vuelvan emocionalmente indisponibles y algunos de ellos son las malas experiencias de la infancia, el miedo a ser herido debido a diferentes traumas, y similares.

What I’m trying to say is that we cannot blame them for being this way, but we can try to understand them, and together, find a way to deal with them and make the best of our relationships.

¿SABÍAS QUE algunas personas se sienten atraídas de forma natural por individuos emocionalmente indisponibles?

In case you didn’t know, it is possible to be naturally drawn to people who are emotionally unavailable. I would certainly know that because I’m one of those people (well, I used to be).

The reason why someone would be attracted to such people stems from their childhood. Let’s say that you never received a healthy amount of affection from your parents or you didn’t receive any at all.

This “lack of love” can manifest in your romantic relationships later on in life, meaning that you will mainly be attracted to those who are emotionally unavailable. ¿Por qué?

Because such people are hard to win. It is really difficult to get them to open up to you and establish a meaningful relationship with them just like it was hard for you to “win” and receive love from your parents.

Do you see where I’m going with this? So, the main reason why you would be attracted to emotionally unavailable people is that you see them as your parents and you think you have to fight hard to win their love.

You might also think that you’re not worthy of being loved.

El trasfondo de sentirse atraído por personas emocionalmente desafiantes es realmente complejo, y el primer paso para afrontarlo es reconocerlo.

El arte de reconocer a un hombre emocionalmente no disponible:

Reconocer los patrones de los hombres emocionalmente no disponibles es realmente un arte en sí mismo. Me imagino lo frustrante que puede haber sido o seguir siendo para ti tratar con un hombre así.

Lo que quiero que sepas es que it’s not your fault. There’s a reason why that man is not ready to commit, open up to you, and talk about his feelings, and that reason is not you.

Now that you know that, we can continue to reveal such a man’s nature. The most important thing is knowing how to recognize them.

Los hombres emocionalmente no disponibles tienen estas 8 características en común:

• He always has perfect excuses for any issue

• He has poor communication skills or is not capable of maintaining good communication

• He is unwilling to compromise

• He is sending mixed signals

• He is seeking attention (but not giving anything in return)

• He has a fear of labeling things

• He has had heartbreaking past experiences

- No se esfuerza para conocerte

También hay muchas otras señales a las que debes prestar atención, pero las anteriores son las más comunes y las más importantes.

¿Cómo lidiar con un hombre emocionalmente inaccesible (y mantener la cordura)?

Como ya se ha dicho, tratar con un hombre así puede ser realmente frustrante y agotador, así que asegúrate de armarte de paciencia (y de mucha consejos sobre relaciones).

Uno de los más importantes formas de tratar con hombres emocionalmente no disponibles es darles un poco de espacio, que suele ser la tarea más difícil en estas situaciones.

If you keep pushing them to open up to you, I can assure you that you’ll make things even worse. You need to let them heal on their own without forcing the whole process.

Aquí tiene más consejos esenciales para mujeres que se han enamorado de hombres emocionalmente inaccesibles:

• Make sure you’re ready to deal with such a man

Are you ready to give your love to someone who doesn’t know how to return it (at least for the time being)?

¿Eres lo suficientemente paciente y fuerte como para no perderte al tratar con un hombre así?

Estas son las preguntas que debes hacerte antes de decidirte a tratar con un hombre emocionalmente inaccesible.

• Listen to him carefully

You need to let him know that you’re ready to listen to him. Once he sees that, he will feel more and more comfortable around you.

Sentirse cómodo es la palabra clave.

If he doesn’t feel relaxed in your company and if he doesn’t trust you, he will not be able to make progress regarding his emotions and commitment.

• Keep your well-being a priority

When dealing with emotionally unavailable men, it’s really easy to start neglecting your own needs and desires. Don’t forget to keep your well-being and your happiness a priority.

• Don’t apologize for having feelings and wishes

Puede que tengas la tentación de disculparte por estar emocionalmente disponible, lo cual suena realmente absurdo, pero ocurre.

When and if that happens, remember that you shouldn’t apologize for having feelings and wishes. You have every right to express yourself regardless of whether the person you’re with acknowledges it or not.

• DON’T push him to open up to you

¿Crees que presionarle le ayudará a comprometerse antes contigo? Piénsalo otra vez.

This will only let him know that you’re not willing to wait for him to become ready for such an important decision.

By giving him some space and time, you’re telling him that you understand what he’s going through and you’re willing to wait for him to sort things out and heal. (By this, I don’t mean wait for an eternity.)

Making an emotionally unavailable man fall in love with you won’t be easy, but it’s doable!

Cómo enamorar a un hombre emocionalmente inaccesible. ¿Cómo hacer que se comprometa contigo?

No, you don’t need to read thousands of books on emotionally unavailable men in order to learn how to make him fall in love with you.

Todo lo que tienes que hacer es ser su amigo.

Tienes que crear un entorno seguro para que pueda expresar sus sentimientos y ser quien realmente es a tu lado. Recuerda que este proceso requiere pasos de bebé.

Open up to him, but don’t overwhelm him with your feelings. Help him, but also remember to have your own life and nourish other connections. Don’t forget to look for señales de que un hombre cauteloso se está enamorando de ti.

Por último, pero no por ello menos importante: Sea paciente y crea que las cosas acabarán por encajar.