¿Se ha acabado de verdad? 10 señales reveladoras de que es hora de romper
Cómo saber si una relación ha terminado
Breaking up is hard. It’s easier to stay in a familiar situation, even if it’s not ideal, but there are some telltale signs that can’t be ignored, regardless of how many shared memories you have.
If you have tried to compromise and communicate but things are still stagnant, it’s time to consider a new path.
Here are the 10 telltale signs that it’s time to break up.
You Give But He Doesn’t
Dos personas en una relación deben actuar como un equipo. Ambos os esforzáis para que funcione y os dedicáis tiempo el uno al otro. Hay momentos en los que una persona necesita dar un poco más, pero esos momentos se equilibran.
Si te encuentras cocinando, limpiando, presionando para pasar tiempo juntos y pagándolo todo, las cosas se han torcido con tu pareja.
Many women fall into this trap. You give and give and give while your man withdraws, so you give more. You blame yourself for everything that’s wrong until things get so bad that they simply break down.
Try to avoid giving too much if it’s not reciprocal. Only put as much into him as he puts into you.
You’ve Grown Apart
It happens. Some people grow while other relationships stagnate. Maybe your boyfriend or husband is still sitting on the couch while you’re out exploring or maybe the two of you are pursuing different things because your hobbies don’t align.
Tuve una clienta que seguía siendo muy religiosa mientras su marido dejaba de ir a la iglesia. Esto era inaceptable para ella y no sabía qué hacer. Al final, decidió que tenía que dejarlo.
Te falta al respeto
Esto es importante para mí y debería serlo para ti. Cuando uno de los miembros de la pareja menosprecia constantemente al otro, hay que replantearse la relación.
Lo veo cuando salgo con otras parejas. Un miembro de la pareja regaña al otro delante de nosotros; se puede cortar el desprecio con un cuchillo.
This can spiral into emotional and even physical abuse if it’s not addressed immediately.
Se acabó el sexo
Sex is a very important component of a relationship. It’s not everything but it’s a key litmus test for how close a couple is. Sex less frequently than once a week can be a warning sign.
There are exceptions, of course. If you’re in your eighties and have been together for fifty years, sex might be out of the picture. Even still, I find elderly couples still holding hands and kissing when they are in love.
You’re Constantly Fighting
Constant arguing is never a good sign. Most couples don’t know how to argue. They never learned because they don’t teach that in life.
There should be very little fighting in a healthy relationship. People in love respect one another’s opinions and work toward a compromise. They each want to hear what the other has to say because they want their partner to be happy.
Comunicación is an art and good communicators have empathy for the other person’s feelings and circumstances. They put themselves in someone else’s shoes to get the result they want.
Cuando ambos miembros de la pareja se comunican de este modo, es posible llegar a un compromiso. El resultado es beneficioso para todos y la relación se fortalece, no se debilita.
You’re Just Plain Miserable
If you dread seeing your guy, something is wrong! Sometimes, you try to overanalyze exactly what’s wrong and blame yourself or your partner. This gets you nowhere.
Si esta es tu situación, confía en tu intuición y márchate, o al menos siéntate y habla de verdad con alguien de confianza. Es probable que esa persona ya se haya dado cuenta.
RELACIONADO: Textos de ruptura: Más de 50 mensajes de texto para terminar una relación
Life’s Curveballs
Hola, a veces el amor no es suficiente. I’ve seen break-ups over religious and cultural belief differences.
Maybe your boyfriend wants to move to a foreign country and you don’t. He hates his family and you need to be near yours. Maybe you want kids and he doesn’t.
That’s life. Accept it, pack up and leave.
Adicciones
Veo esto todo el tiempo. Los hombres y el porno. El sexo virtual se ha vuelto tan fácil que algunos hombres sustituyen las relaciones sanas con las mujeres por vídeos en su portátil.
If you see this, I say leave. The same thing applies to alcohol and drugs. If a man can’t care enough about his own health then how much can he care about you?
Your Goals Don’t Align
People’s goals change as they mature. My goal was money for years. Now I’m into helping others, charity and spiritual pursuits. My time is becoming extremely valuable.
If my wife was determined to live off the grid, for example, we would need to go our separate ways. That’s okay! It’s okay to recognize change, respect the other’s goals and leave on friendly terms.
Quién sabe si dentro de diez años querré vivir fuera de la red.
He’s Holding You Back
You’ve got dreams and goals. A great lover and best friend encourages you to chase them but this man wants you home with him, or worse, he doesn’t care.
What happens? You drop your dreams and ‘fit in’ to make him happy. Instead, find a guy who has similar ambitions and supports your dreams and goals!
Una mujer segura de sí misma no tiene problemas para encontrar a un chico que apoye su deseo de desplegar las alas y volar.
¿Se ha acabado de verdad? Conclusión
Too many couples stay together because they simply don’t want to be single again or for the sake of the children. Time is too precious to be with someone who falls into one or more of these categories above and the harm done to your children is done before you split, not after.
Only you can decide whether it’s time to end things or not. You must decide when you’ve taken as much as you can take or when things just don’t align properly.
