Come convincere la tua cotta a ricambiarti: 15 passi per il successo

You wouldn’t say that you’re totalmente innamorato with this person, but you’re definitely into them and you would like to give it a shot.

La domanda è come, when you don’t have a clue about their feelings?

Come si fa a convincere la propria cotta a piacersi senza sembrare disperati e bisognosi?

Dovreste usare i social media per farlo? O dovreste avvicinarvi a loro di persona?

Dovete essere diretti o va bene inviare solo suggerimenti?

If these are some of the questions going through your head and if you’re wondering how to get your crush to like you in no time at all, then read on for all the answers you need.

15 Ways To Get Your Crush’s Attention

1. Prendetevi cura del vostro aspetto

Quando una persona vi piace già, il suo aspetto fisico viene per ultimo.

You’re way more interested in what type of person they are and in the way they treat you.

However, before you meet someone for the first time, their looks are the first thing you’re drawn to.

La tua cotta non fa eccezione: deve trovare te fisicamente attraente before they’ll give you a real chance.

• Your looks

If you’re wondering how to get your crush to notice you, the first thing you should take special care of is your looks.

I’m not saying that you have to look like a top model with a perfect face and body, but if nothing else, you have to be pleasant to this person’s eye.

Of course, you shouldn’t go under any aesthetic procedures or plastic surgeries to become someone you’re not.

Instead, hit the gym to tone your body a little, and if you’re a girl, wear makeup that suits you, while if you’re a guy, try growing a beard.

• Dress to impress

Il passo successivo è pensare al modo in cui ci si veste.

When I tell you to dress to impress, it doesn’t mean that you should wear super classy outfits-just dress for the occasion.

If you’re not good at matching your clothes, stick to the basics and you shouldn’t make a mistake.

If you’re a girl, emphasize your attributes but do it as subtly as possible.

After all, you don’t want your crush to think that boobs are the only thing you have to offer.

• Personal hygiene

Listen carefully to this one because I can’t underline it enough: always practice good personal hygiene.

Profumate in modo irresistibile, fate una doccia regolare, cambiatevi i vestiti e assicuratevi di avere un alito fresco.

Trust me-you could look like you’ve just stepped out from the cover of a magazine, but if your personal hygiene is questionable, it will all be in vain.

2. Lavorare sulla propria autostima

I’m sure you know a bunch of good looking people with amazing personalities who have absolutely no luck with the opposite sex. Why do you think that is?

Osservandoli, hanno letteralmente tutto ciò che si cerca in un partner. 

However, if you look closely and pay more attention, you’ll see that they’re missing a certain X factor.

Well, that factor you can’t seem to define is called self-esteem. Lucky for you, confidence can be worked on.

You see, here is the trick: you can’t expect your crush to think of you as worthy of their attention if you don’t see your own value.

You can’t expect them to see your qualities if you’re unaware of them in the first place, and you certainly can’t expect them to see you as a catch if you don’t think that way about yourself.

The truth is that you can’t become confident overnight. But you can pretend to be.

Quindi, per cominciare, fingete la vostra autostima. Dimenticatevi della vostra insicurezze e cancellare la possibilità di fallire.

Quando vedete la vostra cotta, comportatevi come se foste i padroni della stanza.

Even if you’re dying on the inside, pretend that you’re certain of yourself-trust me, there is no bigger turn on than this.

3. Complimentarsi con loro

The best way to initiate some kind of contact with the person you’re into is to compliment them.

Everyone likes to be praised and if you’re the one who can make your crush feel good about themselves, they’ll definitely develop interest in you.

However, instead of only focusing on this person’s looks, stand out by complementing their personality and accomplishments.

This especially applies if you’re a man, trying to get a woman to like you.

Dovete essere consapevoli che decine di ragazzi si avvicinano a questa ragazza in continuazione e probabilmente non fanno altro che dirle quanto sia bella e attraente.

Pertanto, il modo per essere speciali è prestare maggiore attenzione a cose diverse dagli attributi fisici di lei.

Trust me-she’ll cherish it more than anything.

4. Lavorare sul senso dell'umorismo

Come si fa a far sì che la propria cotta ricambi il favore?

Well, one of the most efficient ways to work your way into someone’s heart (and into their pants) is without doubt a good sense of humor.

This is a social skill you can work on if you don’t have natural talent.

Il vostro spunto di conversazione potrebbe essere una buona battuta, che farà ridere la vostra cotta e alleggerirà l'atmosfera.

Tuttavia, fate attenzione al tipo di barzellette che raccontate.

When you’re trying to make a good first impression, avoid dark humor because not everyone is into it.

Inoltre, evitate le battute sconce: oltre a essere inopportune e scortesi, potrebbero far pensare all'altra persona che avete in mente solo una cosa.

If you’re prone to sarcasm, make sure you don’t cross the line and become cynical.

5. Condividere un segreto

What’s a better way to get someone to trust you and ultimately to fall for you than sharing a personal secret with them?

Se volete che la vostra cotta si apra con voi, dovete mostrate loro prima le vostre vulnerabilità.

Naturalmente, dovete assicurarvi di presentarvi nella migliore luce possibile.

However, don’t rule out the possibility of exposing some of your flaws and imperfections either.

This way, when your crush sees that you’re not perfect, they’ll become more relaxed in your presence and they won’t be afraid to reveal their true personality.

Also, you’ll show them that they’re important to you and that you trust them, which is a big deal for everyone.

This kind of experience can serve as a chance to bond with the person you’re interested in on a much deeper level.

6. Mostrare interesse per la loro vita

When you’re trying to figure out how to get your crush to like you, the next step is to show an interest in their life and to present yourself as a good listener and a good friend.

No, you shouldn’t be too nosy, nor should you openly stalk them to get some information-the point is to show them that you care enough.

Don’t go straight to sensitive subjects. Instead, start by engaging in small talk and asking them about their daily routines, hobbies, career, migliori amici e altre cose innocue.

Once you see that you’re both becoming more relaxed, proceed with some deeper topics.

Ponete loro domande personali e mostrate interesse per le loro paure, le loro ambizioni e i loro sogni più sfrenati.

Fidatevi di me: sarà una bella soddisfazione avere qualcuno con cui parlare di queste cose.

When it comes to love topics, at the beginning it will be enough to find out whether they’re emotionally available (I’m guessing you already know that they’re single-otherwise you wouldn’t keep hitting on them).

If you start talking about your previous relationships, don’t dig too much through the past and let them give you the amount of information they feel comfortable giving.

7. Trovare interessi comuni

Molti vi diranno che gli opposti si attraggono.

Don’t get me wrong-I’m not going to argue with this notion: they do attract but they rarely last.

Bear in mind that familiarity is the key to getting under someone’s skin.

È scientificamente provato che le persone hanno maggiori probabilità di innamorarsi di qualcuno che ha interessi simili ai loro.

Therefore, it’s your job to find the common interests you have with your crush.

Indagate un po' su di loro, scoprite cosa piace a questa ragazza o ragazzo e trovate qualche somiglianza tra voi due.

Naturally, you won’t admit that you’ve been stalking them and you’ll present everything you know as a huge coincidence.

For example, if you happen to find out that they’re into a certain band or a type of music, casually mention how you enjoy listening to them or even ask them to tag along to a concert.

Trust me-once they hear something like this, they’ll think it’s a sign of faith.

It’s more than obvious that you’re their soulmate and a match made in heaven.

Of course, this doesn’t mean that you should pretend to be someone you’re not just to impress your crush.

Don’t change your basic interests to please them because the truth will be revealed sooner or later.

8. Utilizzare i segnali del linguaggio del corpo

Nella maggior parte dei casi, la comunicazione non verbale parla più forte delle parole vere e proprie.

So, if you’re trying to figure out how to get your crush to like you back, without you having to admit your feelings, using segni del linguaggio del corpo a vostro vantaggio è proprio quello che fa per voi.

Oltre a utilizzare questi segnali non verbali per dimostrare il vostro interesse, potete osservare gli stessi segnali anche nella vostra cotta.

If they’re sending you similar signals, they’re definitely into you and if they don’t,you probably need to try a little bit harder.

• Stay near them

Innanzitutto, sfruttate ogni occasione possibile per stare il più vicino possibile alla vostra cotta.

No, you won’t turn into a stalker who is constantly at their shoulder but if you two are in the same crowd, make sure you always sit next to each other, if you talk to them, whisper in their ear and if you stand near them, make sure your feet are pointed toward theirs.

A prima vista, queste mosse potrebbero sembrare del tutto sciocche e prive di senso, ma credetemi: hanno uno scopo più profondo.

If you use them, your crush will become accustomed to your presence and you’ll have a better chance of making an actual first move on them.

• Make eye contact

Hear me out: in these types of situations, eye contact is everything and it’s your job to initiate and maintain it.

Gli occhi sono le finestre dell'anima: possono aiutarvi a rivelare i vostri veri sentimenti e sono un ottimo modo per flirtare.

Iniziate con uno sguardo alla vostra cotta e vedete come reagisce.

Il passo successivo è fissarli (ma non in modo inquietante) e non distogliere lo sguardo nemmeno quando lo fanno.

If your crush notices that you’re trying to make eye contact and returns the look-there is no doubt that they like you back.

However, if they look away, it doesn’t necessarily mean all of your chances are gone: maybe they’re too shy for deep prolonged contatto visivo or they’re teasing you on purpose.

- Tocco fisico accidentale

Quando si tratta di questi segnali del linguaggio del corpo, il passo finale è rappresentato dai tocchi fisici accidentali.

This is the moment where you should be extra careful because you don’t want to appear creepy and you have to respect the other person’s personal space and boundaries, as much as you have the need to touch them.

To begin with, it should be enough to try holding their hand while you’re talking.

Potete mettere la mano sulla loro spalla o anche sul loro ginocchio, se ne avete l'opportunità.

Inoltre, quando vi salutate, baciateli sempre sulla guancia e teneteli in braccio un po' più a lungo del solito.

What matters here is for you to carefully observe your crush’s feedback.

If you see that they’re not comfortable with what you’re doing-step back immediately.

9. Non entrare nella zona degli amici

Uno dei problemi più grandi che si possono incontrare quando si cerca di convincere la propria cotta a piacergli è l'accidentalità. finire nella zona amicizia.

In order for you to get the person you’re interested in to like you, you have no option but to hang out with them, but that can easily lead to you becoming good friends, which is something you clearly don’t want.

That’s why you have to find a way to make your intentions clear.

Don’t be too pushy but show them that you’re actually hitting on them all the time and that you aren’t interested in becoming their best friend but rather their potential partner.

Per esempio, evitate di essere la loro spalla su cui piangere quando si tratta di altre persone.

Don’t let them talk to you about their dates and don’t give them advice on how to go back to their ex-because this is what friends do.

Be friendly, but use every chance you get to tease them. Most importantly-don’t forget to flirt!

10. Show them that they can count on you…

Forse la qualità migliore per rendere il vostro fidanzato o la vostra fidanzata materiale è l'affidabilità.

Everyone likes having a partner they can count on and who has their back, so you need to show your crush you’re the person for the job.

Prendetevi cura di loro e siate la prima persona che chiamano quando hanno bisogno di un consiglio o di un parere su qualcosa.

Show them that you’re there for them, be consistent and make them understand that you’re not leaving their side, no matter what happens.

11. …but don’t be too available

However, don’t let your crush take advantage of you, which is exactly the effect you’ll have if you become too available.

Show them that you’re there but that you have a life of your own as well.

Don’t be the one calling and texting all the time, as if you have no one else to talk to.

Don’t give them the impression that you’re ready to put your life on hold until they have the decency to choose you.

In sostanza, fate attenzione a non diventare il loro cucciolo e la persona che chiamano solo quando hanno bisogno di un favore.

12. Fare qualcosa per impressionarli

Se volete distinguervi dalla massa, il modo per farlo è di fare colpo sulla tua cotta.

However, when it comes to this step, you have to be aware that not all people are impressed by the same things, so you have to find something that fascinates this person you’re into.

Cosa potrebbe far innamorare la vostra cotta? Che tipo di persona è e cosa la farà cadere in piedi?

È il modo in cui risolvete un determinato problema che hanno? È il modo in cui si ottengono i biglietti per il loro spettacolo preferito?

Oppure, è il ricordo di piccole cose su di loro che hanno accennato casualmente qualche tempo fa?

It’s your job to find out and to use it to your advantage.

13. Trascorrere del tempo con loro

As I already mentioned, familiarity is usually the key to someone’s heart.

That’s why you have to become a part of your crush’s life if you want to get them to like you back.

Don’t be boring but make sure you have regular contact and communication.

Iniziate le conversazioni e lasciate che si abituino alla vostra presenza.

Tuttavia, dopo un po' di tempo, smettete di chiamare e mandare messaggi e provate ad allontanarvi un po'.

Make them miss you and feel your absence, so they’ll get scared of losing you and understand that they want you by their side.

Yes, this may seem like you’re playing mind games but sometimes, you simply have to do it if you want to achieve your goals.

Don’t manipulate them-just make a perfect balance and from time to time, let them chase you.

14. Trasmettere una vibrazione positiva

Just like the rest of us, you also have moments when you don’t feel like your best self.

There are times when you’re negative, nervous, and insecure and that is perfectly normal-after all, you’re just a human being.

However, while you’re hitting on someone, these are not the sides of your personality you should display very often.

Let’s face it-nobody likes to be around naggy, bitter people who’ll kill their mood.

That’s why you have to try hard to be fun whenever you’re around your crush.

Invia un messaggio positivo vibrazione, come up with interesting activities, be optimistic, smile as much as you can, and don’t forget to laugh at their jokes.

Be the person who will brighten up their day-that’s something your crush will appreciate.

15. Chiedere loro di uscire al primo appuntamento

Infine, se non funziona nient'altro, smettete di chiedervi come farvi ricambiare dalla vostra cotta e semplicemente chiedere loro di uscire.

Tuttavia, chiarite che si tratta di un primo appuntamento piuttosto che di un incontro amichevole e che avete la speranza di diventare il loro potenziale partner.

Bear in mind that a lot of people don’t get the hints and that your crush might be one of them.

Siate abbastanza coraggiosi da fare una vera prima mossa: cosa avete da perdere?