7 Coisas más que vão acontecer se seguires em frente demasiado depressa

Curar e seguir em frente com sucesso depois de uma relação disfuncional é o sonho! Mas, na realidade, é uma tarefa difícil.

Toda a gente tem os seus próprios mecanismos de sobrevivência e lidar com o peso de uma separação pode ser feito de várias formas.

Mas uma coisa que não é de todo encorajada depois de terminar uma relação de longa duração é seguir em frente demasiado depressa!

You may think you’re doing yourself a favor by doing everything you can to do esquece-o and completely preoccupying yourself with different things, but you’re really not.

You can’t just erase a huge part of your life. You can’t just pretend that all never happened.

You CAN decide to ignore how you’re feeling and deny that you’re shattered and heartbroken, but eventually it’ll catch up with you.

E vai apanhar-nos de surpresa. E depois, será muito mais difícil recuperar e seguir em frente.

If you don’t believe me, here is exactly how moving on too quickly can and will negatively affect you:

1. Ao não fazer as coisas como deve ser, acaba por reprimir emoções que acabam por o apanhar

If you don’t let yourself process what happened and feel your feelings, it might happen on the worst day imaginable.

You’ll be drinking alone in your kitchen, listening to his favourite song, and it will just overcome you.

Tudo o que estava a tentar enterrar profundamente e a afastar-se de repente vem à superfície e apanha-o desprevenido. 

You won’t know how to deal with all of the emotions, and the fact that you’re drinking will only worsen and heighten the despair you’re feeling.

E é por isso que é preciso lidar com as emoções a seu tempo, até que um dia tudo comece a melhorar.

2. Ter um homem de ressaca só adia o seu sofrimento

Quando se decide ir para a cama com alguém demasiado cedo depois de romper com your man, you don’t get to heal.

You don’t get to deal with your issues. What you DO get is a postponed heartbreak that hits you twice as hard.

You’ll think you’re doing okay and that you’re forgetting all about him.

But what you’re actually doing is sleeping with a random stranger who is going to walk out in the morning and leave you to your own devices. And what then?

What happens when you’re alone with your feelings? You break down in tears and suffer in silence. Don’t do this to yourself. You know better.

3. Seguir em frente demasiado cedo faz-nos baixar os nossos padrões (e perder coisas fantásticas)

By the end of it, you’ll just want somebody there. Somebody to comfort you and tell you it’s going to be okay.

A body to warm yours at night, and just somebody to listen to you. And it won’t really matter if this guy is actually a good guy or somebody with impure intentions.

You’ll just care to not be alone. And that is how you end up in a toxic relationship. You lower your standards for all the wrong reasons and end up in the arms of o homem errado. 

It doesn’t mean it will definitely happen, but it can for sure. And is it really worth it? You might miss out on amazing things and a great man due to your impatience.

4. You can’t get your ex out of your head, no matter how hard you try

If you don’t heal properly, you’ll never be able to get your ex out of your head.

You will see him in every guy you sleep with and in every corner on the street. He’ll be a constant presence in your mind and it’ll drive you nuts.

Se não se curar lenta e pacientemente, não se dá a oportunidade de seguir em frente.

How can you forget about someone if you don’t give yourself the chance to admit how broken you really are? You need to do what it takes to get over it in a way that helps you grow.

5. You’ll compare every guy you date to your ex-boyfriend

Whoever you end up with, they just won’t be able to compare to your ex.

They won’t be able to fill in your ex’s shoes and it will leave you devastated. You won’t want to compare, but you won’t be able to help yourself.

Ele foi tudo o que conheceste durante tanto tempo e tornou-se uma medida para o que precisavas. E agora, com cada novo rapaz, ninguém parece saber como lidar contigo. 

E isso fará com que tem saudades dele like crazy. You will want him again, but you’ll know he’s no good for you, and that will make you suffer more than you actually need to.

6. You’ll give false hope to the next guy and it won’t be fair to him

You don’t want to hurt anybody, I know that, but that is exactly what you will end up doing.

By moving on too quickly, you’ll end up leading the next guy on and make him think he has an actual chance.

And we both know you’re in no place to make that kind of a decision so soon.

O que precisas é de algum tempo sozinho para te recompores e perceberes o que precisas neste momento. E sabe que saltar de uma relação para outra demasiado depressa é exatamente o oposto disso.

7. Vai fazer com que queiras voltar para o teu ex

When you move on prematurely, you see what the world has to offer and it’s just not as good as you had it with your man.

Nothing seems worth the trouble and you just can’t bring yourself to really open up that way to anyone.

Your ex is the only one who made it all worth it (until he no longer did). And now, you don’t see yourself with anyone else, which will make you go back to something that is clearly not good for you anymore. 

You deny yourself a true chance at happiness by not letting yourself go through the healing process. That’s just not right.

You deserve more, and hopefully, you’ll see it too. Time heals all wounds, but you’ve got to let it do its thing first.