Como deixar de sentir saudades de alguém: 10 passos fáceis para a liberdade

Todos nós sabemos que a pior dor de todas é uma desgosto. Bem, sentir falta de alguém é como partir o coração todos os dias, uma e outra vez. 

No matter what that person you’re missing means to you and no matter what the reason was for your separation, a dor está lá e dói sempre o mesmo.

Essa dor do teu dor de cabeça makes you think that there is no right answer to ‘how to stop missing someone you love’. 

Fortunately, that’s only the pain speaking. There are some proven methods on how you can deal with the pain of missing someone in a forma saudável. 

Pinar para alguém que o deixou partir ou que lhe foi retirado afecta seu saúde mental.

Ficamos sobrecarregados com tantos sentimentos negativos e pensamentos sombrios e depois começa a afetar todos os outros aspectos da sua vida.

Quanto tempo é necessário para deixar de sentir saudades de alguém?

Honestamente falando, esta é uma questão ninguém pode dar-te a resposta certa para. Coloquei-a aqui apenas porque sabia que seria a primeira coisa que iriam perguntar. 

I know that time has become so important in our lives today. We all rush through life like we’re running out of time. 

Queremos ultrapassar rapidamente uma separação, queremos encontrar o amor da nossa vida imediatamente, queremos ter tudo de imediato. 

That’s not how the world functions. You have to fight and try hard to get what you want. You have to learn how to stop missing someone or deixar ir de alguém que nos deixou. 

O mais importante é dar tempo a si próprio, para organizar os seus pensamentos, para compreender os seus sentimentos, para se curar, para deixar passar, para seguir em frente.  

We’re all different and we all function differently. Everyone grieves differently. Everyone heals differently.

Quanto tempo é necessário para deixar de sentir saudades ente querido difere de pessoa para pessoa. Não existe um calendário efetivo para o efeito. 

One person doesn’t need much time; when they decide they’re done with missing a person, that’s it. Another person will need some more time and that’s perfectly okay. 

You’re allowed to take as much time as you need. First, you have to heal your coração partido, then you’ll find a way to stop missing the person who isn’t there anymore. 

É necessário efetuar o check-in with yourself daily. Avoiding talking about it or even worse, denying it, won’t help you. 

Sooner or later, you’ll have to deal with it. Believe me, the longer you put it off, the harder it will be for you to deal with. 

Tens de processar os teus sentimentos e isso leva tempo. Pode aconselhar-se com outras pessoas mas, no final, deve fazer o que achar que o vai ajudar a aliviar a dor. 

Ver também: Se sentires falta de alguém, essa pessoa pode sentir? Sim, e aqui está o porquê

Como deixar de sentir saudades do seu ex?

Independentemente de quem iniciou a separação ou da razão da mesma, se amava verdadeiramente o seu parceiro, vai sentir a sua falta. 

Passou uma parte da sua vida com essa pessoa uma pessoa and it’s perfectly normal that you miss them or the relationship you had. 

Por vezes, esse sentimento domina-nos completamente e impede-nos de pensar claramente sobre o que aconteceu ou sobre o que podemos fazer. 

This is how you’ll shift your focus back to yourself and stop missing that uma pessoa who didn’t even deserve you in the first place.  

1. Escreve tudo o que sentes

Iniciar um diário e usar esse diário como seu psicólogo particular. Despeje seus sentimentos em um pedaço de papel escrevendo tudo o que sente. 

Trust me, it worked for me, it’ll work for you too. Most people don’t feel comfortable sharing some of their deepest emotions with another human being; that’s why this method is going to work for you for sure. 

Make a list. I called mine ‘The pros and cons of dating him’. You can call yours whatever you want, then write down all the good and bad sides of your relationship with him. 

You have to be brutally honest, that’s very important, then weigh up those pros and cons and I’m sure everything will become more clear to you.

You’ll see that you were actually stuck in a relação tóxica. You’ll come to the conclusion that your ex actually never even deserved you. 

Anotar todos os boas recordações que se lembrem de ter partilhado com os vossos ex-namoradoAcrescente a isso todas as coisas más que aconteceram na vossa relação e volte a fazer as contas.

I’m sure there were a lot of great moments in your relationship but I’m also sure that there were some terrible and awful periods that can make you forget the good ones. 

Your journal will also serve as a great reminder for you after you definitely let go of your ex. It’ll remind you how strong and brave you were and how you manage to let go of a person who meant so much to you. 

2. Escreva-lhes uma última mensagem

You’re allowed to send them one last message but hey, it really must be THE LAST ONE. That’ll be your much-needed closure. 

Write everything you feel now and how you felt when you ended your relationship. If it’s too much for a text message, then write them a letter. 

Be honest. Admit to them how you still miss them but emphasize how this message isn’t your attempt to get them back.

Tell them how you’re trying to move on and stop missing them and how this is the one last step you have to take in order to do that. 

Tell them how angry you are because they left you and you can’t make your heart stop loving or missing them. 

Recordar-lhes o ano passado e como tudo era diferente antes. Recorde-lhes o quanto se divertiram juntos e o quanto se amaram em tempos. 

Don’t be too pathetic. Maybe you’re afraid that you’ll never be able to move on but they don’t have to know that. 

3. Bloqueie-os nas suas redes sociais

Não há necessidade de os espiar no seu redes sociais as it’ll only make things worse. When you see the photos they post on their redes sociais, it’ll only make you miss them more. 

If they post about a song you like or a movie you watched together, you’ll think that they posted it for you and it’ll get your hopes up that they want to be with you again.

You’ll only be more disappointed once you realize that’s not the case. You’ll start thinking about how it’s for some other woman, how they’ve already found someone new. 

Na verdade, a razão mais importante para bloquear o seu ex no seu redes sociais é porque só assim estará a salvo de enviar mensagens de texto em estado de embriaguez. 

This reminds me, you should also delete their number from your phone. I hope you don’t know it by heart though because otherwise all of this is pointless. 

4. Apagar todas as fotografias do seu ex-namorado

You don’t need anything that can remind you of him. Their photos and all the photos where you two are together can delay your process of healing. 

Don’t waste your time lying in bed and crying over their photos all day long as that’ll also make you miss them more. 

Tens de seguir em frente, porque o teu ex já o fez de certeza. Tens de deixar o teu ex onde ele pertence; tens de o deixar no passado. 

5. Passar tempo com os seus amigos para se distrair de pensar neles

Maybe you neglected your friends while you were in a relationship but don’t worry; it happens. If they are your true friends, they’ll understand and forgive you. 

Ligue-lhes e convide-os ou convide-os para sair consigo. Saia mais vezes com elas. Eles estavam consigo antes do seu ex e estão consigo agora. O que é que isso lhe diz? 

True friends will be with you forever. They’ll remain by your side no matter what happens. Your friendship means more to them than any other relationship in their life. 

Essas pessoas são as que gostam verdadeiramente de si e só querem o melhor para si. Passar o tempo com as pessoas que nos amam verdadeiramente é a melhor terapia de sempre, juro. 

You can fake a smile as much as you want but they know that deep down, you’re suffering.

Eles sabem que o teu sorriso é apenas uma fachada because you won’t allow other people to see that you’re hurt and that you still miss the guy who left you. 

They’ll do everything they can to make you happy again, to see an honest smile on your face. They’ll tentar distraí-lo and keep you busy so you won’t have time to think about your ex. 

Os teus amigos são verdadeiramente os teus endorfinas. They can make you feel good no matter how difficult your situation actually is. ​​​​​ 

6. Estar aberto a experimentar coisas novas

Experimente coisas novas, planeie algumas aventuras para si, saia da sua zona de conforto. Agora que tem tanto tempo livre, use-o para fazer algo que sempre quis fazer. 

Esta é uma óptima oportunidade para aprender algo como uma nova língua ou algumas artes e ofícios. 

Experimente um novo passatempo. Começar a jogar futebol ou outro desporto de que goste. Jogue jogos de computador. Experimentar novas receitas. 

Traveling is also great therapy for lonely souls or those who suffer in love. It distracts you from thinking about it but it’s also a good opportunity to meet new people or who knows, maybe even novo amor. 

7. Evitar coisas que possam despoletar memórias antigas

Avoid all the things that you two loved to do together as it’ll only remind you of your relationship and make you feel even worse. 

Evite locais que tenham significado para ambos.

Sure, you have some pleasant memories associated with certain places where you two went but reminding yourself of those moments won’t make you miss them any less; on the contrary, you’ll only miss them more. 

Evitem ver os vossos filmes preferidos ou ouvir as músicas de que ambos gostam. Evite todas as coisas que possam despoletar memórias da sua relação passada. 

8. Evitar os vossos amigos comuns durante algum tempo

Don’t get me wrong; I’m not saying that you should break friendships with your common friends just because you broke up with him. 

No entanto, seria melhor evitá-los durante algum tempo, porque eles vão falar dele à sua frente.

They probably still hang out with him and they’ll know if he has moved on with his life already and it’s better for you to not find out that information. 

They’ll remind you of some times from your relationship, some boas recordações, and that’s the last thing you need right now. 

If you can’t avoid them, then don’t talk about him in their company. Just like they would talk to you about him, they would also talk to him about you.

Don’t allow them to see how miserable you feel. Whatever you do and however you feel, you must not tell them that you still miss him and can’t do anything about it.

Don’t allow yourself to look pathetic because they will probably tell him that. 

Maybe he still has feelings for you or he doesn’t want to see you suffer and he could ask you to get back together.

Trust me, you don’t want to do that as you’ll regret it sooner or later. He isn’t in love with you anymore, he would do it only out of pity. 

Se os vossos amigos comuns são os únicos amigos que têm, então saiam e conheçam outros. Na verdade, esta pode ser uma óptima oportunidade para conhecer novas pessoas e fazer novas amizades. 

Esses novos amigos can be very helpful in these kinds of situations. They won’t ask questions about your past and you’ll feel more relaxed and comfortable hanging out with them. 

9. Aprender a arte de deixar ir

The first thing you need to do is let him go for real. After you firmly decide that it’s time to finally do that, you’ll immediately começar a sentir menos a falta dele. 

Stop holding on to the past. He left you, he went from your life and that’s it. You have to accept it and move on. 

I’ve been there. I know how much it hurts and believe me, it’s going to hurt for a while but your only option is to come to terms with the break-up and move on. 

You’ll need time, that’s for sure. You need time to figure out how you exactly feel. You need to be alone for a while. 

Tem de organizar os seus pensamentos e sentimentos e refletir sobre a sua relação e a separação. Será que esse homem merece mesmo que sintam tanto a sua falta? 

10. Don’t forget to take care of yourself

Okay, you’re allowed to spend the first day after the break-up in your pajamas, lying in your bed, surrounded by ice cream and chocolate. 

You’re hurt and you’re missing your ente querido. You have every right to cry so cry your heart out; it’ll make you feel better. 

Don’t bottle up your emotions. Share them with your best friend or the family member you trust the most. Don’t shut yourself off as it affects your emotional bem-estar e saúde mental. 

Passado algum tempo, é preciso dizer a si próprio that it’s enough. Já choraste o suficiente e agora tens de sair dessa situação e prestar atenção a ti próprio. 

It’s time to think about yourself. It’s time to make self-care your priority so take care of yourself. Autocuidado é o primeiro passo para amor-próprio e a auto-aceitação. 

Primeiro, tem de relaxar e a melhor maneira de o fazer é tomar um banho longo e relaxante. Prepare um banho de espuma com alguns óleos essenciais calmantes.

Put on some relaxing music, light some candles and don’t forget to pour yourself a glass of your favorite wine. This kind of bath will lift up your mood for sure. 

Mime-se. Vá às compras e compre roupas novas. Experimente novas máscaras faciais. Mude o seu penteado ou experimente um novo corte ou cor de cabelo. Faça uma maquilhagem completa. 

Então sai. Faz com que ele se arrependa de te ter deixado. Mostra-lhe que foi a pior decisão da vida dele. Faz com que ele sinta a tua falta.  

You’ll be noticed for sure. Not only by him but by other men. Soon, your Facebook and Instagram will be full of friend requests and messages. Who knows, maybe that’s how you’ll meet someone new. 

Dê a si próprio a oportunidade de conhecer alguém novo. Don’t be afraid to date again. A novo amor could help you forget your ex and that’s how you’ll stop missing him for sure.  

Como lidar com as saudades da pessoa amada numa relação à distância?

Estar num relação à distância is hard but if you love your partner, it’s totally worth it. Distance means nothing if you’re in love with that person. 

I won’t lie. There is nothing you can do to completely stop missing your outra pessoa significativa mas aqui estão algumas coisas que pode tentar para lidar com isso de uma forma mais forma saudável.  

1. Know that you won’t be in a long-distance relationship forever; it’ll change one day

Be positive as this is only a temporary situation. One day, you’ll be ready to make your relação oficial and you won’t be in a relação à distância mais.

You’ll be together every day. You’ll wake up next to your ente querido todas as manhãs e adormecer ao seu lado todas as noites. 

Everything will change, you just have to be patient and wait. Don’t put too much pressure on your partner or yourself because otherwise it’ll also affect your relationship. 

2. Perceber que manter um contacto constante é uma prioridade, mesmo durante as lutas

Mesmo quando estamos muito ocupados, temos de arranjar tempo para o nosso parceiro e vice-versa. Têm de estar em contacto permanente um com o outro.

I don’t mean that you have to talk or chat 24/7 but you have to be in contact every day. 

É preciso ter em conta que um relação à distância tem tudo a ver com trabalho árduo. Se queres mesmo fazer com que resulte, tens de lutar por isso.

Eu digo sempre: graças a Deus pela tecnologia! Manter-se em contacto permanente, especialmente através de videochamadas, ajudará a aliviar a dor da saudade. 

3. Planear o próximo encontro

I’m assuming you count the days when you’ll see your outra pessoa significativa novamente. Bem, podes fazer mais do que isso. 

Planear tudo sobre the next time you’ll see each other. Plan some fun activities for you both, pick the restaurant where you’ll eat, choose the movie you’ll see at the cinema. 

Use every moment of your SO’s visit and leave nothing to chance. It’ll keep you busy so you won’t think much about how you’re missing them way too much. 

4. Passar mais tempo com os teus amigos

Being in the house counting down the days when you’ll finally see your SO and waiting for them to call you or text you won’t do you any good. 

Tens de sair e passar algum tempo com os teus amigos. Tem de se distrair e estar com as pessoas de quem gosta é uma óptima maneira de o fazer. 

​​​​​​​They’ll find a way to cheer you up because that’s what friends are for. 

5. Encontrar um novo passatempo ou algo que o distraia

Tem de se manter ocupado e há muitas formas de o fazer. Encontre um novo passatempo; for example, something you think you’d like and always wanted to try. 

Exercise more or start going to the gym. If you don’t like the gym, you can do yoga or meditation, as they have calming and relaxing effects, so one of these will also be great to help you deal with missing your SO. 

Don’t think too much about when you’ll next see your partner. Do the housework, do some gardening or you can always redecorate your house or your garden or find some DIY projects on the Internet. 

Também pode fazer algo para o seu parceiro e surpreendê-lo com um presente feito à mão da próxima vez que o vir.

6. Pensem no vosso futuro juntos

As I already said, this is only a temporary situation and it’ll pass. You have to think about and focus on your future. 

Think about how you’ll start living together very soon. Think about the primeira vez you’ll be buying something for your own place. Those days will come sooner than you think, I promise. 

Think about how proud you’ll be for both of you fighting for your relationship and overcoming so many challenges and obstacles. 

Como aliviar a dor de uma separação definitiva?

A morte de um ente querido é uma experiência horrível, especialmente se perder o o amor da sua vida. Uma perda enorme deixa marcas no nosso coração para sempre. 

No one can give you advice on how to stop missing someone who was taken away from you because the fact is you’ll never stop missing that person. 

No entanto, pode aliviar a dor dando a si próprio tempo para o luto e fazendo algumas coisas que o distraiam de pensar na sua perda. 

It’s important not to just listen to other people’s advice. We are all different and we all cope with the grief of loss differently. We all need time to heal and you have the right to take as much time as you need. 

You can ease the pain and after some time, you’ll start missing them less but the truth is that you’ll never stop completely missing them.

The right answer to the question of ‘how to stop missing someone who died?’ doesn’t exist unfortunately.