One of every woman’s worst nightmares is to have a selfish lover. And it’s like that for a reason. If he is self-absorbed in bed, imagine what he’s like in all the other aspects of a relationship.
Even though sex is not the most important part of a relationship, there is no woman on this planet who would sign up for a lifetime of lousy sex with a partner who is not doing anything to change that.
If he is wrapped up in his own pleasure and needs, maybe it’s time to rethink the whole relationship. But first, take a look at the signs and determine if he really is selfish in bed:
1. He skips to the main event right away
You sometimes wonder if he knows what foreplay is and why it is so important to women. With a selfish partner, foreplay is short-lived or non-existent. He probably doesn’t need it and he doesn’t care that you do.
Foreplay is there for a reason; it increases the level of arousal and it’s one of the preconditions for making a woman orgasm. If he cared about satisfying you, he would know that.
2. He never goes down on you
Which is OK if you are not going down on him either. We all have our likes and dislikes in bed. And oral sex doesn’t have to play an important role for everybody.
But if he expects oral sex from you and hardly ever returns the favor, you are with a selfish lover who is concentrated on his pleasure only.
3. He doesn’t care whether you came or not
What’s important is that he did. All the time, he finishes too fast; you were just getting warmed up but he already crossed the finish line.
Now a generous lover would go down on you, continue with petting or at least be ashamed he failed to please you but a selfish one will not. He will probably be asleep before even bothering to ask whether you had a good time or not.
4. He doesn’t think twice before giving you pointers
He will say what you should do differently or what you should do more of. However, he doesn’t like when you do the same. He doesn’t like to be told what to do or how to do it.
Good communication is key to a successful relationship, in and out of the bedroom. Odds are he lacks communication skills with both.
5. He doesn’t care if you’re not in the mood
He wants it when he wants it and he will be persistent as a bull until he gets it. He will find a solution to every problem. If you have a headache, he will say something like it will get better after sex.
If you are on your period, he will say something like he doesn’t have to suffer for it and that he should at least be satisfied orally. A selfish lover will never care about how you feel or what you are in the mood for.
6. He thinks that you are overreacting
No matter how gently you put it, his ego is bound to get bruised. He doesn’t like to hear that his performance was faulty. He will listen to you but do absolutely nothing to change things.
In the best case scenario, he will try for a while but aft