You’ve expected a boyfriend who will surprise you with romantic dinners with candles, romantic weekend getaways, serving you your favorite breakfast in bed or giving you ‘I love you’ poems.
And instead, you’ve got someone whose biggest romantic gesture is to hold your hand and share the last two spoons of ice cream with you.
It’s disappointing and at the same time frustrating, and you cannot blame him for being unromantic because romance is not something you’re born with.
It’s something you acquire through time, so don’t think it’s something unattainable.
If you give it some time, stay patient and follow these 6 tips on how to cope with the situation you’re in, I assure you that everything will fall into place.
Tell him what you expect from him
If your boyfriend is an unromantic soul, you need to understand that he has no idea what being romantic means.
So, you cannot expect him to know what he has to do or how he needs to behave in order to express his romantic side.
The best you can do is to tell him what your expectations are, and this will help him understand how things function in the romantic world.
This will open his eyes, and he will finally know what he ought to do if he wants to make you happy.
Don’t equate his unromantic side with his affection
Don’t ever let his unromantic side make you question his affection for you.
It’s necessary for you to understand that he cares about you and he loves you, but he has some problems with expressing this with romantic gestures.
The sooner you realize this, the easier it will be for you to cope with the problem.
Unromantic people simply see things differently than others because they don’t have a feeling for what’s romantic and what’s not.
And that is why you need to be his guide and stay patient as long as possible.
There’s nothing wrong with your relationship or your partner; it just needs some time and effort.
Don’t judge him or compare him with others (more romantic partners)
The worst thing you can do is to compare your boyfriend with other boyfriends or your exes who were more romantic than him.
It is really painful for him to hear that and just think how you would feel if he told you the same.
Comparing him with others will only prolong the situation and hurt his feelings.
And your goal is to open his eyes and lead him in the romantic direction, not hurt him in the process.
Show him how it’s done
When you’ve explained what you expect him to do, show him how it’s done.
Serve him his favorite breakfast in bed, plan a romantic dinner or think of something else that will show him what it should look like.
Once he sees your example(s), he will be able to connect the dots, and copy your actions (which is still progress in the right direction) or think of something else more innovative (will happen over time). Whatever he decides to do, be proud of his small baby steps.
Be ready to compromise
Also, be ready to do things that you’ve perhaps avoided doing in the past.
If your boyfriend is totally into gaming, try sitting next to him and asking him to explain how you play a certain game. Just enjoy the time spent together.
You can always create a romantic atmosphere regardless of the activities you’re engaged in.
And when he sees that you’re ready to compromise and go out of your way to be part of something he really enjoys doing, he will also be ready to do such things for you.
He will no longer make excuses that he doesn’t know how to prepare a romantic dinner or similar.
He will do everything in his power to make you happy because he knows that this means to you just as much his games mean to him.
Appreciate his efforts
Always remember to acknowledge his efforts because he will need your support and give him the green light that he’s doing something right.
Appreciating means telling him that you’re proud of his progress and everything he does for you.
It doesn’t need to be something big to let him know that he’s done it right.
Acknowledge every single thing he does that has something with being romantic, and he will do his best to continue doing so.
After all, all the greatest things need practice, and this isn’t an exception.
And if you keep being persistent in supporting your partner through his transformational journey, you will be surprised at what the two of you are capable of achieving together.