“Don’t be confused between what people say you are and who you know you are.” – Oprah Winfrey
This quote opened my eyes and made me realize the fact that it’s not my fault if he doesn’t care. That is when I slowly started to let go.
In the beginning, he probably seemed like every other guy you liked – someone who will meet the real you, your needs and ideas as they are, recognize your essence.
But, more often than not, that is not the case.For most people, not being confused about who they are, especially at this point in time, can be very challenging.
That alone is a huge obstacle. How can we expect someone to accept us as we are when we don’t know who we are ourselves?
Recognizing and meeting the needs of someone you deeply care about and love can easily lead to mindless pleasing based on our own need for approval.
When that happens, that means you’ve lost your own approval and things become clear.
He does not see your effort; he does not see he’s using you; he does not see you’re not yourself… he simply does not care.
When that happens, you need to know one thing: You cannot make him care.If it doesn’t happen naturally, it simply won’t happen.
That is the moment I already mentioned – a moment to let go.
Even though it can be painful and devastating, you should never doubt yourself, because it was never your fault.
Some things are just not meant to last, and once they end, that has nothing to do with you.Try thinking this way: There is only so much time in this life.
Self-doubt is something that will happen on its own, in many aspects of your life, and love should not be one of them.
Especially not because of one blind-street relationship and a guy who simply wasn’t something you needed at the time.
Your life mission is to be yourself and reach your full potential. Losing yourself means numbing and losing your purpose and happiness.
Without purpose and happiness, meeting your potential is quite impossible.You shouldn’t be quiet about what makes you an authentic human being.
You should always speak your truth and follow your heart.
This will surely make you vulnerable, but it will save you from pushing yourself to be someone you’re not and living the life that’s expected of you.
In other words, you’ll be vulnerable but you’ll be at peace with yourself.
Luckily, when you are sincere about your life, people often recognize that, so it’s true that when you care for yourself, others will follow.
People tend to overthink everything and get triggered over the most irrelevant things.
Maybe instead of asking Why doesn’t he care for me? try asking Why don’t I care for myself enough to take some action and make my life happier?
There is a quote by Jung that says that “the privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.
” That’s why I think that in search of love, you should first care about yourself and know yourself.
Recognize your own wants and needs. Recognize the reason why someone’s indifference is bothering you so much.What do we have to prove?
Why are we not content with what we are? Does our dependence on the approval of others tell us more about us than it tells about them?
Only when we master ourselves and learn to care for ourselves can we care about others and give them the love they need.
Love yourself. Be kind to yourself. Recognize feelings that arise in you. Build self-empathy.
Self-care is not only about pampering and eating the right food, but it is also about forgiving yourself for the things you cannot control. It is about letting go of shame.
Shame is a soul-eating feeling. Maybe it’s even the reason why you care about someone not caring. You’re ashamed of not being enough.
But you are enough – always – and the shortest way to find that out is by caring for yourself.