Cuando se te pasa por la cabeza tu ex novio, cosa que últimamente ocurre con demasiada frecuencia, sientes nostalgia. Le echas de menos y estás segura de que es con él con quien quieres estar, a pesar de todo lo que ha pasado entre vosotros dos.

Well, it’s time to start doubting your own feelings when it comes to this guy. Because there is a huge possibility that you only think you miss him and that you’ve only convinced yourself you still have feelings for him.

There is a huge possibility that you actually don’t quiere recuperar a su ex en tu vida, y aquí tienes 6 cosas que te ayudarán a entenderlo por ti mismo.

1. You don’t love him—you just got used to him

La verdad es que este chico es tu zona de confort de la que te da miedo salir aunque eso es exactamente lo que deberías hacer. Te has acostumbrado a él y esta relación representa algo familiar para ti, a pesar de toda su negatividad.

Piensas que quieres a ese chico, pero en realidad no es más que un viejo hábito que te cuesta cambiar. Mientras que usted piensa que usted está anhelando para su ex, en realidad está anhelando para esta sensación de familiaridad que él le ha estado dando.

Deep down, you don’t want to get back on the dating market, and you don’t feel like letting someone new into your life. So the best possibility for you would be to come back to this guy. After all, you know that to expect from him, and you know how things would turn out this time.

Trust me on—going back to someone just because you got used to them and the sense of belonging they gave you is one of the worst things you can ever do to yourself.

2. Es el mismo hombre que era

Cuando piensas en volver con tu novio, en el fondo esperas que esta vez las cosas sean diferentes. Esperas que él cambie.

But the truth is that he won’t. You need to understand that this guy is the same man he was and that the of you will have all the same differences and problems if you get back together.

Nothing has miraculously changed in your personalities and between the two of you just because you’ve taken some time apart.

Yes, it is likely that you will have a honeymoon phase when you get back together, but things will soon go back as they were. After all, you broke up for a reason, didn’t you?

3. You don’t miss him—you only miss having a boyfriend

If you’ve been in a long term relationship, you’ve gotten used to having a romantic partner. And this is what you actually miss. You miss this sense of belonging and partnership which you had while you were in a relationship.

This means that you are actually scared of your single life. What you don’t know is that this can be the time of your life if you just learn to embrace it and focus on taking the best of it.

This can be a time in which you focus on yourself instead of on your partner. A time in which you understand that you actually don’t need a man to be happy and that you are a complete person on your own.

4. Sólo te centras en los buenos recuerdos

Cuando miramos algo en retrospectiva, tendemos a centrarnos en los buenos momentos y a dejar de lado los malos recuerdos, porque son los que queremos olvidar.

Y esto es exactamente lo que haces cuando se trata de tu ex. Te olvidas de todas las lágrimas que lloraste por él, y sólo recuerdas cómo era capaz de hacerte sonreír. Olvidaste todas las veces que discutisteis, y sólo recuerdas los momentos felices.

You focus on the beautiful memories that the two of you had together and on this guy’s qualities while you completely disregard his flaws.

Ver tu última relación a través de unas gafas de sol de color de rosa hace que parezca tentadora. La ves mejor de lo que fue en realidad y es natural que quieras recuperar esa versión idealizada.

5. Tienes miedo de sentirte solo

It is natural to feel a little bit lonely and empty after you end a relationship. But that doesn’t mean that you miss or love your ex.

It just means that this feeling is unfamiliar to you, and it scares you. But what you don’t know is that being single and alone isn’t as same as being lonely.

Remember—you are more than enough for yourself. Besides, I’m sure there are other people in your life who you deeply care about besides your ex and these are exactly the people you should focus on to help you fill this void.

6. Su ego está herido

There are times when you don’t want to have someone back in your life because you really think they deserve to be there. Sometimes, you feel heartbroken but actually the only thing which is hurt is your ego.

Y no hay nada malo en sentirse así.

It’s quite simple—you want to prove to yourself that you can always have this person, who was once yours, back. You want to prove to yourself that you still have an impact on this guy and that you are still important in his life.