6 cosas que debes saber antes de elegir al chico adecuado

Hoy en día es difícil mantener una relación de calidad. Cada día se ven matrimonios y relaciones que se desmoronan.

Casi no se puede navegar por Internet sin ver a alguna pareja de famosos poniendo punto final a su relación.

And I bet it has happened to you a number of times. You thought you’d finally met a guy who will make love easy, who is going to be there for you for the rest of your lives, but your bubble burst soon and you broke up.

Entonces perdiste la esperanza, decided you’re going to stay single...pero entonces llegó otro a tu vida y volvió a pasar lo mismo.

Ibas en círculos y lo único que conseguiste es que te dejaran.

So, that makes you wonder. Wouldn’t be great if there was some kind of manual to a long-lasting and a happy relationship, directions that would exactly show you is he worth the bother or not?

Yeah…but you know that there is no such thing.

Instead, give it all you’ve got, have faith that every next guy might be the one because in the end, you actually never know.

But I know this is easier said than done and that’s why I bring you a few things you definitely need to know in order to choose the right guy.

Tienes que saber que tiene un pasado

You have to understand that he has baggage from the past. You aren’t the first girl he met and you can’t exactly know what emotional state he is in.

Maybe he has been hurt, maybe he doesn’t trust women that much or maybe he is just emocionalmente inseguro.

Creo que la mejor manera de ver su comportamiento futuro es echar un vistazo a su pasado. La gente puede cambiar, pero no tanto.

Su interior y sus sentimientos, percepciones y principios más profundos seguirán siendo prácticamente los mismos.

If you don’t like what you see, if you don’t like his past behavior, it’s better to move on. Don’t fool yourself into thinking that you can change him.

If he doesn’t want to do that himself, you can’t either.

Chemistry isn’t the key

Sé que cuando conoces a alguien y la química es de otro mundo, te sientes atraído por esa persona al instante.

What you have to have in mind is that chemistry isn’t the key to a successful relationship. Chemistry can only help at the beginning.

Puede acercar a dos personas, pero a medida que pasa el tiempo, la química se desvanece.

If you are left with nothing at that stage of the relationship, it will probably fall apart and you’ll have to start from the beginning.

Nunca pongas excusas a las cosas malas que ocurren en tu relación sólo porque la química es magnética.

Tienes que ser capaz de ser tú misma a su alrededor.

I know this sounds cheesy, but it’s also very true. You don’t want to spend the rest of your life pretending you are something that you’re not.

Al final te consumirá lentamente y te destruirá.

Cuando conozcas al chico que crees que puede ser el elegido, sé tú misma desde el principio y si le gusta, estupendo.

If he doesn’t, screw him—you don’t need that kind of man in your life.

Being yourself around the person you love and not being judged for it is the best feeling in the world. You’ll be so happy because you will be both in love and true to yourself.

Tienes que estar seguro de que tiene las cualidades que necesitas

Asegúrese de que coincide con usted en las cosas que son importantes para usted, como la religión, la familia, la economía, etc.

Don’t focus just on the first thing you see—like for example the fact he has a sense of humor and he makes you laugh. Don’t let that blind you.

Sure, you’re fine with him at the beginning because he has that characteristic you love so much, but what if that certain thing is making you miss other things, big things, which he lacks?

If this happens to you, you are going to have huge problems later in a relationship when he doesn’t have the qualities you want.

Tienes que ponerte a ti primero

This is not selfish. It’s perfectly logical—especially if you have been hurt before.

Tienes que pensar en tus objetivos y aspiraciones y, una vez que sepas cuáles son, tienes que averiguar si tiene agallas para apoyar tus sueños.

¿Tiene lo que hay que tener para ayudarte cuando necesites su ayuda?

Nunca te sometas a una sola persona porque puedes encontrarte llegando al final de tu vida sin lograr nada porque fuiste su apoyo emocional por completo.

Find a balance, but don’t ignore things you want to do. If he really is the right one for you, he will support you in whatever you do and he’s going to make you a better person than you already are—and you are going to do the same for him.

Tiene que haber confianza y respeto

The most important thing of them all. All of these things don’t make any sense if there is no mutual respect and trust.

Te puede gustar todo lo que quieras, pero si le ocultas cosas o él te las oculta a ti, algo va mal. Tienes que respetar su espacio personal como él tiene que respetar el tuyo.

Men value respect above everything else. For them, respect is the equivalent of how love, trust and appreciation are in women’s lives.

A man needs to feel needed and respected for what he does. If he is not, he will probably think that you don’t care enough about him and he slowly desenamorarse.

Lo mismo te ocurre a ti cuando se trata de confianza y aprecio. Tienes que tenerlo, de lo contrario, te sentirás indeseado e ignorado.

Echa un buen vistazo a las cosas que necesitas saber antes de elegir al chico adecuado y ahórrate el dolor de elegir al equivocado.

El corazón es el que elige, pero intenta implicar también tu parte racional en la toma de decisiones.

Try to find the balance between the two and you’re going to be just fine.