Cómo aceptar las cosas como son y 10 formas en que cambiará tu vida

Que te digan que aceptes las cosas como son puede resultar confuso. Después de todo, ¿por qué debería hacerlo? Depende totalmente de ti cómo reaccionas ante algo, ¿verdad?

But hear me out. As “unacceptable” as some things may appear to be, when you learn to practice acceptance in difficult situations, you are actually working toward your own well being.

¿De qué estoy hablando? Well, it’s quite simple really.

La vida tiende a funcionar de formas misteriosas, lo que puede hacer que a veces disfrutar del momento presente sea todo un reto.

Un día, eres la persona más feliz del mundo y, al siguiente, los pensamientos negativos te abruman y tu paz mental desaparece sin dejar rastro.

Precisamente por eso es crucial aprender a afrontar las situaciones negativas.

The power of acceptance allows you to recognize a particular situation for what it is and helps you truly understand someone else’s point of view.

Ocurrirán cosas malas y su situación actual puede verse comprometida en un abrir y cerrar de ojos.

Entonces, ¿cómo hacer frente a la situación sin perder la cordura?

Here’s your foolproof guide to preserving your inner peace in the face of the most negative situations.

Véase también: Relación Enmeshed: Definición, señales y consejos para superarla

El poder de la aceptación y 8 pasos para lograrlo

Acknowledge what you’re dealing with

El primer paso hacia la paz interior es aprender a reconocer a qué te enfrentas y su gravedad real.

Un gran número de personas que conozco se escandalizan constantemente por las situaciones en las que se encuentran.

They’ll be like: “Oh my God, how can this be happening?!” or “I don’t understand why this is happening to me!”

Y eso es el resultado de no estar dispuestos a enfrentarse a lo que tienen delante.

We all get so caught up in our heads that we foolishly believe something is manageable, when in fact, it’s the opposite.

Y entonces, cuando se presenta una situación desafortunada, nos pilla por sorpresa, boqueando incrédulos en lugar de estar preparados para los diferentes resultados posibles.

People have a tendency to create a bubble of self-delusion and distance themselves from reality by believing that something “simply needs to work out”.

Pero rara vez funciona así. La vida tiene otros planes y esa burbuja estalla antes de que tengas la oportunidad de disfrutar de la ilusión.

Aquí es donde tienes que dar un paso adelante y ver las cosas como realmente son.

You cannot allow yourself to be presented with facts and foolishly negate them because they don’t fit your preferred idea.

If you are given a red purse and you keep claiming it’s blue, it’s not going to change color – no matter how deeply you want it to.

De nada sirve que algo nos sorprenda y nos coja desprevenidos si nos negamos a reconocerlo tal y como es.

You’re in this situation whether you like it or not.

You have two options. Recognize its importance and gravity or keep pretending it isn’t so.

Puedes pasarte dos años y medio engañándote a ti mismo o puedes enfrentarte a la música.

Intenta canalizar tus emociones negativas para encontrar algo positivo al respecto.

Como dijo Buda: “The mind is everything. What you think, you become.”

So dig deep within yourself and try to figure out why you’re having such a hard time with non-acceptance.

¿Se aferra a una esperanza perdida y ha llegado el momento de aceptar la realidad y seguir adelante?

Empatiza contigo mismo durante todo el proceso

It’s perfectly okay if you don’t see the point in acceptance at first. It can be daunting and difficult to imagine.

So don’t be too hard on yourself if you find it challenging.

It’s not a crime to find it hard to make peace with something you’re not happy about.

Y tienes todo el derecho a sentirte como te sientas en esta situación concreta.

But by learning to accept things as they are, you are granting yourself the ability to open your mind to things you never believed you’d find okay.

You are going to go through an array of emotions and stages before you’re able to fully embrace them. But that’s okay.

It’s not a marathon. It’s a journey that’s going to be challenging to say the least.

Permítete respirar y dar un paso atrás de vez en cuando.

You are going to have an occasional freak-out (we all do) and you’re going to struggle at times, depending on the situation.

Don’t be too hard on yourself. Don’t beat yourself up and criticize yourself for not being okay with certain things.

La vida se complica y todos nos quedamos atascados, pero eso nunca debe impedirte perseguir tus sueños.

Here’s what I do whenever I’m in a difficult situation that is preventing me from being as happy as I know I deserve to be.

I visualize myself on a sunny, warm island. The sun is shining, birds are chirping, and I’m lounging on the beach, sipping my Martini.

There’s a mild breeze and an overwhelming sense of calm.

And nothing can go wrong here. I’m in paradise, completely at peace with myself and my surroundings.

Y esto es lo que me ayuda a mantenerme centrado en la tarea que tengo entre manos en los momentos difíciles.

Sé que un día esta será mi realidad. Quizá no hoy, ni siquiera el año que viene.

Pero un día voy a estar sorbiendo ese Martini, libre de todas las preocupaciones, sabiendo que todo está bien.

And do you know what? It will be. Whatever you’re going through, visualize your happy place, and concentrate on what awaits you.

I promesa it’ll help you cope.

Don’t take things personally (you’re no a victim of life’s cruel circumstances)

Let’s be honest here. We’ve all (at one point or another) had this annoying feeling like we’re constantly being targeted by life.

Bad things keep piling on and it’s as if someone has it in for you. But I’m sorry to let you know you’re just dealing with some bad luck. That’s all.

El año pasado fue probablemente uno de los peores de mi vida.

Tuve un problema tras otro, desde la pérdida de un ser querido hasta problemas laborales, pasando por tener que mudarme tres veces. Era un asco.

But I didn’t let it get to me. I knew that life had dealt me a lousy hand and I had no choice but to accept it and learn to cope.

Did I like it? Absolutely not. But did I think that the world had conspired against me? Again – no.

So whatever you’re going through and whoever is causing you disarray, just know that most of the time it truly isn’t personal.

When people treat you poorly in any capacity, it’s merely a reflection of how they’re feeling inside.

Recuérdalo. La vida real puede ser un asco a veces.

Pero el único camino hacia la superación personal pasa por reconocer que tienes que aceptar las cosas como son.

Not because it’s good for you and not because you tienen que me gusta.

But because if you don’t, you’ll constantly be looking over your shoulder. This too shall pass.

Life doesn’t have it in for you and you haven’t been put on this earth to suffer eternally.

You’re just experiencing a particularly lousy period that is preventing you from seeing the light at the end of the tunnel.

But there is a light, scout’s honor! Just hold on a little while longer and start practicing the power of acceptance.

Véase también: Mi Ex Ya Está Saliendo Con Otra Persona Y Me Duele - Esta Es La Razón

Just because you accept it doesn’t mean you have to like it

Okay, here’s what most people get wrong about this. Accepting things as they are doesn’t mean you have to like it in any way, shape, or form.

Don’t let anyone delude you into thinking that just because you’re trying to be okay with something, you’re suddenly a fan of it.

Acceptance doesn’t have anything to do with your preferences. You are merely accepting a situation exactly the way it is.

You’re not trying to change it because you know it’s futile.

And that’s a sign of maturity and progression.

Sure, in an ideal world, everything would be exactly to your liking and you wouldn’t have to struggle with accepting negative situations.

But we don’t live in an ideal world. Things don’t always go to plan, and sometimes, you’ll have to compromise.

Y la mejor manera de disfrutar del momento presente es hacer las paces con las cosas que no puedes cambiar.

¿Cuántas veces te has negado a ti mismo la felicidad por estar dándole vueltas a algo que desearías que fuera diferente?

¿Y de qué te ha servido?

Creo que ya sé la respuesta. Así que a partir de ahora, en lugar de obsesionarte, empieza a aceptar.

You don’t have to like it in the least. But you do have to accept it for your own well being. The only way forward is through.

Así que ahorra a tu mente pensamientos innecesarios, acepta las cosas como son y vive la vida que amas.

Some things are simply beyond your control and that’s okay.

Ver la aceptación como una forma de autocontrol

The way things currently are doesn’t have to be ideal. And I bet that it isn’t.

Does this mean that you shouldn’t accept it even though you cannot affect it? Quite the contrary.

You see… we all should fight for what we want and believe in. After all, isn’t that what life is all about?

¿Encontrar aquello que enciende tu alma y perseverar hasta conseguirlo?

But sometimes, you’ll hit a bump or two. Sometimes, it’ll be manageable, and other times, the obstacles will be insurmountable.

Y en esos momentos, tú decides cómo se desarrollará todo.

¿Seguirá persiguiendo algo que le está resultando esquivo (por no decir otra cosa) o tirará la toalla?

In my experience, it’s always best to know when it’s time to cut your losses and move on. You can’t win them all.

And when you learn to be truly at peace with that, you’re going to achieve a level of self-control that not many possess.

Eso te ayudará a ir por la vida con más paz y tranquilidad.

Situations won’t always be desirable, but when you cannot affect the outcome, it’s best to just accept things as they are and move on to something better.

And yes, it’s possible to find the peace within by acknowledging that some things just cannot be changed. Así se hace:

• By distancing yourself from the situation once you realize it’s out of your hands. A healthy separation will help you heal.

• Understanding that you shouldn’t punish yourself for something you had zero control over.

• By allowing things to unfold the way you know they should regardless of your personal preferences.

• Letting go of your toxic habit to react instinctively. It’s always preferable to count to 10 before making any judgments.

• By finally knowing not to expect anything positive out of a negative experience. Some things aren’t meant to go your way.

• Choosing to remain calm amidst it all. You are the one who decides how you let it affect you. Choose wisely.

• By not agreeing with it but at the same time not being against it. Simply let it be the way that it is.

De este modo, estás aprendiendo el poder del autocontrol que te ayudará a vivir en paz.

La clave está en no dejar que tus emociones negativas controlen tu vida.

La aceptación puede deparar sorpresas inesperadas pero positivas

¿Has pensado alguna vez qué podría ocurrir si decides dejar de luchar contra algo que no puedes afectar?

Sé que puede parecer una tontería, pero hay muchas bendiciones ocultas incluso en las situaciones más difíciles.

And when you stop fighting it and start accepting it, you’ll see what I mean.

Puede que aprenda un par de cosas sobre cómo funciona algo en particular o, mejor aún, que mejore sus propias habilidades, lo que le permitirá reaccionar adecuadamente.

I’m sure you’ve heard the inspiring saying: “Every cloud has a silver lining”. ¡Y realmente lo hace!

Here’s my personal example that I feel fits perfectly here. A few years ago, I broke up with my then-fiance.

Needless to say – era malo.

At the time, it was truly a devastating period that I couldn’t imagine yielding any positivity.

And for a while, it didn’t. I was lonely, sad, depressed, and hopeless.

Acababa de perder al amor de mi vida, a la única persona junto a la que esperaba envejecer de todo corazón.

What was I supposed to do now? How was I ever going to meet someone who’d understand me so deeply?

Pero como en las películas, conocí a alguien cuando menos lo esperaba.

Todavía estaba conmocionada por la ruptura, completamente incapacitada para estar con alguien en ese momento.

Pero por cosas de la vida, me persiguió hasta que acepté tener una cita, y vaya si me alegro de haberlo hecho.

Este tipo era todo lo que nunca pensé que necesitaba y más.

Me ayudó a salir de mi pozo sin fondo, esperando pacientemente a que llegara a un punto en el que pudiera corresponder a sus sentimientos.

Y así como así, una de las peores experiencias de mi vida me trajo a la mejor persona I’ve ever known.

Things will seem dark for a while. Then one day, you’ll start seeing a glimmer of light.

Te darás cuenta de que lo que haya pasado tenía que pasar para traerte algo mejor.

Puede que no siempre sea así.

But doesn’t the mere fact that it is an actual possibility make the current situation at least a bit more manageable?

Véase también: Cómo dejar de buscar la validación de los demás para empezar a prosperar

Flaws and weaknesses are a part of everyone’s nature

Here’s a scenario. You’re walking down the street, minding your own business, and you see a dog with its owner approaching you.

You think to yourself: “Oh what a sweet doggo, I have to pet it!” which you do with a smile on your face the minute they pass you by.

But instead of the cuddle that you expected in return, the dog bites your fingers (just barely), barks, and crawls back between its owner’s legs.

Ahora bien, está claro que el perro no quería ser acariciado (como es su derecho).

But in this situation, you don’t go off on the sweet furry creature, because you get it.

You understand that you probably should’ve asked if it was okay de antemano.

So you say that you’re sorry and give the dog a reassuring look, feeling really badly about assuming it would be okay with unsolicited attention.

See where I’m going with this? People are oddly similar to dogs in this particular sense.

You know that it’s in a dog’s nature to react (by barking or biting) if it feels threatened in any way.

Pero sólo te causa angustia o te molesta si te niegas a aceptarlo como una parte normal (y bastante esperable) de su comportamiento.

En este escenario, puedes aceptar plenamente las cosas como son.

Aplique esto a su relación con los seres humanos en su vida cotidiana y observe cómo las cosas empiezan a mejorar de repente.

Let’s face it. Accepting that people are all flawed is much easier than constantly being flabbergasted by their actions.

Puedes conseguirlo fácilmente simplemente observando a los que te rodean para averiguar su naturaleza.

Once you do, it’ll become increasingly easier to accept them as they are and stop wasting time on being annoyed and mad.

Y lo mismo ocurre con las circunstancias.

Depending on the particular situation you’re in, you learn to embrace things that you cannot control quite quickly.

You know what can be expected, therefore, you don’t allow yourself to lose sleep over it. Why?

Because you’ve trained yourself to see it coming, which makes life that much easier.

Whenever you’re in doubt remember that this too shall pass.

“Pain is your friend; it is your ally. Pain reminds you to finish the job and get the hell home. Pain tells you when you have been seriously wounded. And you know what the best thing about pain is? It tells you you’re not dead yet!” – G.I Jane

Piense en ello. Has sobrevivido a todos los sinsabores, a todos los obstáculos insuperables y a todos los retos que te ha puesto la vida.

Every single time you thought that you couldn’t pick yourself up, you did.

Cada vez que estabas seguro de que la vida nunca volvería a ser igual, te demostrabas a ti mismo que estabas equivocado.

Cada vez que alguien te rompía el corazón y sentías que el mundo se había parado, eras capaz de seguir adelante. ¿Qué te dice eso?

You’re a survivor. You go through hard times and you don’t let them chip away at your hope.

You hold your head high and manage to crack a smile even when it’s the last thing you feel like doing.

Sabes que la procrastinación no conduce a nada bueno. Sabes que compadecerte de ti mismo es contraproducente para tu bienestar.

And every single time you feel like life has defeated you, you prove it wrong. Doesn’t that make you feel strong and badass?

All the pain you feel is temporary. However lost you feel right now, it’s going to be okay within weeks.

It might be hard to accept it now, but your whole life you’ve been proving this to be a fact.

And now, for your own peace of mind, pick yourself up, remind yourself that there isn’t a challenge you cannot overcome and move forward.

One day, you’ll be laughing about this. Scout’s honor.

Véase también: 8 señales de que te gusta agradar a la gente y cómo dejar de serlo

10 maneras en que tu vida empezará a cambiar a mejor

En la vida hay muchas cosas que escapan a tu control.

La gente se va, ocurren cosas desafortunadas todo el tiempo y te encuentras con obstáculos que a veces parecen mayores de lo que puedes manejar.

Pero cuando aprendes a aceptar las cosas como son con la ayuda de los pasos antes mencionados, este is how it’ll change your life.

Empezarás a creer más en ti mismo

If we’re being honest, the only person in your way is none other than you. You choose how you let things affect you.

So when you train your mind to accept things and embrace the uncomfortable facts, you’ll start having more faith in yourself.

You’ll see that you are capable of taking on problems of all magnitudes and live your life peacefully, regardless of them.

Y todo esto hará que disfrutar del momento presente sea mucho más fácil.

Entrenarás tu mente para reaccionar ante las cosas desde una perspectiva racional

We are all guilty of reacting passionately instead of rationally sometimes. That’s just in our nature.

But how much easier would your life be if you found a way to react in a way that doesn’t relieve you of your peace of mind?

Siguiendo los pasos anteriores, esto puede hacerse realidad. Este es tu billete para una vida sin estrés (con excepciones ocasionales) y una navegación bastante tranquila.

Give it a shot and see how good things can be for a change. Not being fazed by things is the dream, and it’s well within your reach.

You’ll finally replace that fake smile with a genuine one

Sometimes it feels like we have to force ourselves to be happy every day, doesn’t it?

For work, for our parents, for our friends going through their own thing…

Pero se vuelve realmente agotador. En algún momento, sólo quieres ser realmente feliz. Y ésta es tu manera de conseguirlo. Acepta las cosas que no puedes cambiar.

Haz las paces con las circunstancias que escapan a tu control y vive la vida que quieres vivir.

Once you do, you’ll notice that fake smile disappearing and a real one forming.

Véase también: La regla del no contacto: El poder del silencio tras una ruptura

Seguir adelante dejará de parecer una tarea imposible

And isn’t that kind of the entire goal here? Moving on unaffected?

You’ve probably fooled yourself that you were okay more than once. But this mantra will help you actually sea bien y seguir adelante.

You’ll realize that you should’ve done this a long time ago…

But you’ll be okay with the fact that you didn’t! You will understand that this is your moment and the timing couldn’t have been better.

Now you’re much stronger and more resilient, therefore, you’re able to accept it all and let it go just like that.

You’ll start oozing confidence

And people will notice it too. You’ll be much more confident in yourself and it will show.

There will be a new sense of pride within you that won’t go unnoticed.

That’s what usually happens once people get to this point.

Unimportant things stop mattering, the big things don’t seem so big anymore, and the notion to enjoy the little things is no longer lost on you.

You’ll start being more goal-oriented

Su nueva perspectiva le será de gran ayuda.

Tu motivación irá a la par. Tus objetivos parecerán por fin más cercanos y tu actitud prosperará.

You’ll understand that life is full of unexpected twists and turns, but that doesn’t mean you should lose your cool.

The power of acceptance will lead you through life and you’ll be motivated to do things you used to fear. The sky will be your limit.

You’ll be as close to healthy living as ever

The occasional drink you used to have after a draining day won’t seem so alluring anymore.

La comida rápida que era tu consuelo será sustituida por una dieta más sana.

You’ll start making small (but important) changes to your life that’ll jump-start a path to healthy living.

Be it cigarettes, alcohol, unhealthy food….you won’t find it so hard saying no anymore.

Tu nueva perspectiva de la vida cambiará por completo tu vida.

Véase también: Por eso debes confiar en el calendario de tu vida

You’ll find yourself sleeping better

Se sabe que el estrés afecta a nuestra vida y a nuestra capacidad para dormir por la noche.

And if you used to have trouble sleeping, don’t be surprised if it all starts changing.

Sleepless nights will be replaced with a night of full rest. And do you know why? Because you won’t go to bed anxiety-ridden.

There won’t be a million issues rummaging through your mind.

You’ll know what deserves your attention and when to accept things as they are. And life will be peachy again.

Y estarás mucho mejor preparado para ayudar a un ser querido que lo necesite.

¿Y hay algo mejor que saber que has podido ayudar a alguien a quien quieres?

La gente a tu alrededor pasa por sus propias cosas, pero tu ansiedad a menudo te impide darte cuenta de verdad.

So once you’ve got all your ducks in a row, your eyes will be more open to this.

The way you’ve managed to change su life will help you make a change in someone else’s.

And once you do, it’ll be ten times more gratifying than anything before.

Cambiar tu propia vida es suficientemente importante.

But once this encourages others to make necessary adjustments in their own lives, it’s on a whole other level.

Siempre hay una forma de darle la vuelta a las cosas. Solo hay que estar dispuesto a abrir la mente y verlo.

“If you’re feeling low, don’t despair. The sun has a sinking spell every night, but it comes back up every morning. The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain.” – Dolly Parton

Véase también: Reto de 30 días de amor propio: conviértete en la mejor versión de ti mismo