17 reglas de los amigos con derecho a roce

Creo que todos hemos visto la comedia romántica "Amigos con derecho a roce", en la que Justin Timberlake y Mila Kunis hacen que este tipo de relación parezca muy fluida.

Pero se olvidaron de las reglas de "amigos con derecho a roce" cuando se enamoraron.

Hay dos escenarios posibles con un amigos con derecho a roce relación.

This is the first one, where both partners fall in love and realize they can’t continue with this type of relationship and decide to make their relationship official.

Tel suyo es el que tiene un final feliz.

El segundo escenario, con un final no tan feliz, es cuando uno de los miembros de la pareja empieza a atrapar sentimientos for their FWB and that makes them end their relationship before it’s too late.

This doesn’t mean that a FWB relationship can’t work. It really can but it’s almost always short-lived. You can’t be in such a relationship forever.

You can’t be with someone for pure physical pleasure for too long. After some time, one of you will fall in love with the other person or will want a more relación seria.

You’ll want someone with whom you’ll be able to talk about your day, someone to confide in and someone you’ll be able to date without any ground rules or anything like that.

It’s so much easier for guys to follow the friends with benefits rules. They’re used to no-strings-attached hookups.

Women are a lot different. We fall in love much faster than guys and that’s why it’s much more difficult for us to maintain a relationship without any romantic feelings being involved.

17 reglas necesarias para los amigos con derecho a roce

Estas son algunas reglas importantes si quieres tener una relación satisfactoria con tu compañero de diversión y no enamorarse con ellos después de algún tiempo y estropearlo todo.

Debes estar 100% preparado para este tipo de relación

Antes de entrar en esta relación, ambos tenéis que leer y estar dispuestos a seguir todas estas reglas y tenéis que entender su verdadero significado.

If you fall in love easily or catch feelings too quickly, this relationship definitely isn’t for you.

However, if you want to have fun without any commitment or if you’re looking for some random conexiónEntra en tu perfil de Tinder y que empiece la búsqueda.

Elige bien a tu pareja FWB

You must find a person who’s also willing to accept all of these rules. Before you get involved in anything, you must define your relationship and be sure that you both want the same thing.

I wouldn’t recommend for you to be involved in this type of relationship with your co-worker or best friend; actually, it would be better to choose someone you’ve just met.

If you start a FWB relationship with someone you know, it’ll just complicate the relationship between you once the affair ends.

The ‘friends’ part is really important

Don’t just pay attention to the ‘benefits’ part. You should also have a friendly relationship even before getting physically intimate.

You don’t have to be mejores amigos who’ll share all of your secrets and keep in touch 24/7 but it’s nice to get to know them a little bit more.

You’ll then both feel more sure that it’ll positively affect your intimacy.

Tener expectativas muy claras

Así que lo primero que tienes que hacer es definir tu relación.

There shouldn’t be any unrealistic expectativas and you shouldn’t expect for the relationship to become official after some time, even if you do develop some feelings for your fun buddy.

The only expectation you should have is that there shouldn’t be any expectations or obligations. It’s a relationship without any commitment and that’s the way you should keep it.

Es IMPRESCINDIBLE establecer límites

Como en cualquier otra relación, establecer unos límites claros es crucial para que esta relación funcione.

Unos límites definidos te ayudarán a saber que ambos estáis en la misma sintonía emocional.

Both partners must be clear about what they want from the relationship and both of you have to respect each other’s boundaries.

Compruebe regularmente

You don’t have to be in contact all day long but you should check in regularly, at least every other day.

Texting your fun buddy only when you want to meet up with them is a little bit disrespectful and even if it’s not a real relationship, you should show them respect and appreciation.

You aren’t dating, therefore dates are off-limits

Going out for a coffee or to the cinema or preparing them dinner at your place is something you should definitely avoid because that’s a sure way you’ll catch some feelings.

This isn’t a real relationship and you aren’t dating, that’s why you shouldn’t go on dates. The only date you should have is the one in the bedroom.

Abrazarse es un no-no

Como al fin y al cabo se trata de una relación romántica, muchas parejas FWB piensan que deben abrazarse durante los preliminares o después de intimar.

Actually, it’s better to avoid mimos porque produce oxitocina (la hormona del amor o de los mimos) y tus emociones se interpondrán y arruinarán el acuerdo que tengas.

Remember, you aren’t dating and cuddling will probably just confuse you both and complicate your relationship.

Estar abierto a probar cosas nuevas

While you’re having fun with this kind of relationship, this may also be a perfect time to try some new things you always wanted to do in the bedroom.

Pregúntale a tu compañero de diversión por sus fantasías o si le gustaría probar algo nuevo.

If they suggest something new without you even asking them, don’t be afraid to step out of your comfort zone and have a little bit more fun.

Intenta, pero INTENTA de verdad, no contagiarte de sentimientos

This won’t be difficult if you both do follow these rules. Keep in touch but don’t spend too much time together.

It’s okay to become friends with them and get to know a little bit more but you shouldn’t tell them everything about your life.

Mantén una relación ligera y juguetona e intenta no profundizar demasiado.

Respect the ‘no sleepover’ rule

Pasar una noche juntos podría complicar vuestra relación.

You’ll see how confused you’ll be the next morning, when you wake up by their side.

You won’t know whether you should stay and wait for them to wake up or just sneak out of their place. It’s unnecessary and definitely not good if you want to keep things casual.

You’re both allowed to date other people

With all FWB arrangements and rules, both sides have the right to date other people because their relationship isn’t exclusivo.

Being in a casual relationship like this doesn’t mean you’re taken.

You’re still single and in the dating game and whenever you meet someone new, someone you would like to date officially, you have the right to end the affair with your fun buddy.

Tal vez esto pueda parecer injusto, pero estas son las reglas.

Los celos están fuera de la mesa

No strings attached means that there shouldn’ be jealousy either.

You’re both allowed to date other people, meet new people and go out with whomever you want.

Si empiezas a sentir celoso because your partner finds someone new and starts dating them for real, it’s a good sign that you do have some romantic feelings for them.

If you keep being emotionally unattached, you won’t probably have any problems with the other side dating someone else.

It would be better if you didn’t meet each other’s family and friends

You’ll probably want to tell someone about your little affair and you should but only one of your best friends. Be aware that the fewer people who know about it, the better it is for you.

Piensa en ello. ¿Qué le dirías a tu familia sobre tu amigo? No es sólo tu amigo ni sólo tu amante.

Would you have the guts to tell them the truth, that he’s your fun buddy?

Meeting each other’s friends and family members would just unnecessarily complicate things.

Y además, te resultaría más difícil afrontar la ruptura una vez terminada la relación porque tu familia o amigos podrían preguntarte por ellos con frecuencia y puede que no sepas qué decirles.

Don’t create unnecessary drama

If something happens, like if you disagree about something or your partner starts dating someone, don’t immediately start creating unnecessary drama.

Most people like this kind of relationship exactly because they’re completely drama-free or at least they should be.

Tienes que saber por qué estás allí. Sólo por diversión, ¿no? No es divertido crear un drama innecesario.

Utilice siempre protección

You’re aware that this relationship is just temporal, right? You know you’re there for fun and excitement only, right?

Then stay safe and always use protection. It will keep you STD-free (as you’re in a non-monogamous relationship) and will also prevent the risk of pregnancy.

Don’t ruin all the fun and excitement there is just because you’re in a hurry or you simply forget to use protection.

Ese momento de irreflexión, podrías lamentarlo el resto de tu vida.

Seguir ciegamente todas estas reglas

Trust me, I know what I’m talking about. I have been there already and it didn’t end well because I thought we’d be able to function like that without any rules.

We still don’t talk, even though it was so long ago. And the worst thing is that person is my co-worker.

Tengo que verlos todos los días en mi lugar de trabajo y todavía queda algo de tensión entre nosotros.

That’s why I would honestly advise you to follow these ground rules that will help you get a better understanding of this kind of relationship and maintain it for as long as you want.

¿Funcionan los amigos con derecho a roce?

A FWB relationship is really trending nowadays and it’s becoming more and more popular every day because of many reasons.

It’s popular with people who aren’t ready for a relación comprometida y, de hecho, son los que más se involucran en este tipo de relaciones.

This option works best for them because they need that ‘no strings attached’ fun and they don’t really even want to think about getting into more serious relationships yet.

The other day, I read the question, “Can friends with benefits work in real life?” and it made me really laugh.

Como cualquier otra relación, las FWB también pueden funcionar si ambos miembros de la pareja se esfuerzan para que funcione.

Of course, it doesn’t require saso much effort as a more serious relationship; however, there are some very important rules that both sides must respect if they want to maintain their relationship.

¿Has oído hablar alguna vez del contrato de amigos con derecho a roce? Sí, eso también existe.

If you feel it’ll be better for you both to make your arrangement official, this is a great solution.

Puedes encontrar algunas plantillas de contrato en Internet y modificarlas de forma que os convenga a los dos.

Remember, if both sides are ready to stick to their part of the arrangement, you’ll be able to maintain your FWB relationship without getting attached for sure.

A veces, puede durar incluso más que algunas relaciones reales.

¿Cómo terminar una relación de amigos con derecho a roce?

Poner fin a una relación de amigos con derecho a roce casi siempre resulta muy difícil y doloroso para uno de los miembros de la pareja.

A veces, una de las partes olvida la regla más importante de las FWB y se enamora de la otra.

A veces, uno de los miembros de la pareja quiere algo diferente, algo más serio, y eso le hace poner fin a su actual aventura.

If you want to get out of your friends with benefits situation, here are some dos and don’ts that will help you to end it in the least painful way possible.

Debe hacerlo en persona

Don’t be a coward and stand behind the decisions you make.

Don’t start avoiding your FWB partner all of a sudden just because you don’t have the guts romper.

Don’t hide behind text messages or social media. If you make a decision to end your FWB relationship, you have to do it face-to-face.

Maybe you’re afraid of the other’s side reaction or how they’ll deal with the breakup but still, it really is the best choice to do it in person.

Also, you shouldn’t do it in public because your partner might be hurt and they might deal with it even worse if you do it this way.

They might be surprised by your decision and they won’t know how to react to it while there are other people around you.

Siéntate y ten una conversación sincera con tu pareja FWB

Sea cual sea el motivo por el que quieres poner fin a tu pequeña aventura, debes ser sincero con la otra parte y decírselo.

Aunque no tengas motivos o simplemente te hayas aburrido de ese tipo de relación, debes decírselo sinceramente.

Don’t leave the relationship open-ended or give them any false hope.

Even if you aren’t sure about your decision, you mustn’t lead them on until you’re completely sure or until you find someone else.

After all, you’ve spent a part of your life with that person and even though it wasn’t a committed relationship, you must be fair to them and end things in the right way.

Pero mantén la ruptura ligera

You’re both aware that you agreed on a casual relationship with no strings attached. That’s exactly how your breakup should be.

La otra parte puede haber empezado atrapando sentimientos for you and the breakup might be painful for them but you shouldn’t feel like it’s your fault.

Sabían desde el primer momento en qué se estaban metiendo y entraron en esa relación voluntariamente.

They made a mistake by not respecting your FWB rules so you shouldn’t feel bad if they don’t take the breakup well.

Don’t try to comfort them in the moment with some silly words like, “You’ll be fine,” “You’ll move on,” “You’ll meet someone new soon…” No, you are the last person they need in their support network right now.

Diles que te gustaría seguir siendo su amigo

Don’t push it but ask them how they feel about staying in contact and hanging out as friends sometimes.

If they haven’t fallen in love with you, they’ll probably take the breakup well and they’ll be able to stay friends with you.

Of course, because of your history, you won’t be able to be best friends immediately but who knows… Quizá con el tiempo os hagáis mejores amigos y os riáis de vuestra pequeña aventura en el pasado.

If they don’t take the breakup well, they probably won’t want to seguir siendo amigos contigo después.

They’ll know that it would be impossible to become friends with you without hurting their own feelings.

Also, when you mention how you would like to stay friends with them, don’t do it in a stupid way, like asking them, “Can we stay friends?” or just by stretching your hand out to shake hands with them and simply asking,

“Friends?”

Si lo haces de esa manera, debes esperar que te den una bofetada o, al menos, que te den la espalda y se vayan sin decirte una palabra.

Escucha lo que tienen que decir sobre la ruptura

After you tell them the news about the breakup, sit down, as it’s now your time to listen.

Sus opiniones no deben afectar ni cambiar tu decisión, pero debes mostrarles respeto y escuchar lo que tienen que decir.

If they feel like you did something wrong to them or how you didn’t respect your part of the FWB arrangement and you realize they’re right, you should apologize to them and ask for their forgiveness.

Si preguntan usted no llamar or check in with them for a while, you should agree to that and promise them that even though you would like to stay friends with them, you won’t do it until they’re ready to talk and hang out with you.

Okay, it wasn’t a serious and committed relación romántica pero aún así puede ser doloroso para tu amigo.

Maybe they got used to you or maybe they became attached to you even though they knew they shouldn’t. Sometimes, we can’t order our heart what to do or whom to love.

Don’t devalue them

You’re breaking up with them and it’s probably because you no longer like them or you no longer enjoy the thing you have.

Sin embargo, has pasado tiempo con esa persona y se merece tu respeto y aprecio.

Don’t make this FWB situation more difficult than it is already, especially if you see that they’re suffering because of your decision to split up.

Tienen que saber lo mucho que les aprecias como amigos y lo mucho que significaría para ti que siguierais siéndolo.

Diles que tú también aprecias el tiempo que estuvisteis juntos y todo lo que pasasteis.

Also, tell them how your relationship was really fun and that you’ll always cherish those good moments and memories but now the time has come for you to move on.

Mantén tu decisión pase lo que pase

Some people can’t afrontar el rechazo Bien. Your partner may be one of those people and even if they don’t have romantic feelings for you, they might get angry after you end your affair.

However, once again, that isn’t your fault so don’t let it affect your decision.

If they start crying or begging you not to break up, that shouldn’t change your mind about ending that little affair you had.

Tenías tu acuerdo de amigos con derecho a roce y ellos sabían que vuestra relación acabaría en algún momento.

Tienes tus razones para romper con ellos y debes atenerte a ellas, independientemente de cómo se tomen la noticia.

Cortar todo contacto después de la ruptura durante algún tiempo

It’s okay to ask them to stay friends after the breakup. However, you should give both them and you some time to process it all.

If they are emotionally attached to you, the breakup will hurt their feelings and it’ll be more difficult for them to process their emotions.

You should give them some time to grieve and to decide whether it’s really a good decision for you to stay friends or not.

Puede que haya cierta tensión entre vosotros tras la ruptura y probablemente sería lo mejor que ambos respetarais la norma de no contacto.

Después de algún tiempo, probablemente ambos seguiréis adelante y si los echas de menos como amigos, puedes ponerte en contacto con ellos y pedirles que queden para tomar un café o algo así.

Don’t immediately get back in the dating game

After you end your FWB relationship, don’t immediately activate your Tinder profile again and start looking for a new FWB partner.

Incluso si fuiste tú quien rompió con ellos, deberías darte un tiempo sólo para pensar en tu relación anterior y reconsiderar si realmente quieres una casual relación así de nuevo o si estás preparado para algo más serio.

Además, después de algún tiempo, puede que te des cuenta de que sentiste algo por tu ex-pareja y que rompiste con ella porque tenías miedo de lo que pasaría después.

Puede que te des cuenta de que la ruptura fue un gran error y quieras reconciliarte con ellos y llevar vuestra relación al siguiente nivel.

Give yourself some time to clear your thoughts and your feelings. Give yourself some time to see whether you’re going to miss that person.

Maybe you’ll regret the breakup and be able to save the relationship before it’s too late.

Véase también: Más que amigos con derecho a roce, pero no una relación

Disfruta de tu relación FWB mientras dure

Empezasteis este tipo de relación sólo porque queréis divertiros sin tener obligaciones reales el uno con el otro, ¿verdad?

Then don’t think too much about whether it’s going to work out or not and just enjoy it while it lasts.

However, don’t get into such a relationship if you don’t think you will be able to be with someone and spend time with them without your feelings getting involved.

Este tipo de relación puede parecer excitante y divertida, pero también puede llevarte a que te rompan el corazón.

Ambas partes deben seguir estas reglas de amigos con derecho a roce y sólo así podrán mantener su relación.

Ten siempre presente por qué estás allí. Si empiezas a sentir algo por tu pareja FWB, sal de esa relación e intenta seguir adelante lo antes posible.