28 señales obvias de una novia infiel y las mejores maneras de manejarlo
Buscando señales de novia infiel? I’m sorry it has come to this, but if your partner is indeed a cheater, you deserve to know!
Lately, you’ve noticed her taking phone calls at weird hours, a sudden change in her busy schedule, unknown guys commenting on her social media posts, and her buying new clothes.
She’s been spending less time with you and more time with new friends. And now, you’re worried that there are even more warning signs that you’ve been oblivious to.
That’s where I come in. As a self-proclaimed relationship expert, I’m thoroughly familiar with all the subtle signs that some might miss.
I just need to warn you of a few things. Don’t let this control your life and don’t get too tangled up in her lies and deceit. I am going to help you figure out the next course of action.
However, you need to be smart about this. Things could turn sour really quickly if you don’t play it smart. Pay attention and follow my lead.
I’m going to present to you the telltale signs your girlfriend is cheating, help you cope with it, and list things to AVOID doing. So bear with me.
Banderas rojas que demuestran que tu novia te es infiel
Sigue haciendo cosas sin incluirte en sus planes
Hace poco, erais inseparables. Si alguna vez hubo un plan, los dos formabais parte de él y no hacía falta decirlo.
But in the past few weeks, or even months, she’s been making various plans with one notable difference; she’s stopped including you.
It’s either little road trips with friends, nights out with co-workers or a family night with her siblings. And even though you always used to be her plus one, lately, there’s no room for you.
If you’re being honest, it has started to really gnaw at you. What the hell is going on all of a sudden?
Ha empezado a borrar el historial de su navegador a diario
This is something she never used to care about. She’d Google the most random stuff and just leave it there knowing you’d probably tease her (which she secretly loved).
Pero ahora, en cuanto se levanta del portátil, sabes que el historial de búsquedas va a estar vacío.
Sure, people do this and it’s not that weird but for someone who never gave a damn about this a few weeks ago, it sure seems suspicious.
You don’t want to seem paranoid but you know her too well to think it was for no reason.
Se pasa la mayor parte del tiempo pegada al teléfono mandando mensajes a alguien.
Los mensajes de texto siempre han sido su forma preferida de comunicación, pero la cuestión es que tú has sido el receptor durante mucho tiempo.
But now, even when she’s with you, she is glued to her phone and kind of secretive about who she’s texting. If it was a friend, wouldn’t she just tell you because it’s honestly no big deal?
This is easily a good sign that she’s hiding something. When you’re constantly on your phone but unwilling to tell your partner who you’re texting, there’s definitely something fishy going on there.
Véase también: Cómo Disculparse Por Ser Infiel: 10 maneras de hacer que tu pareja te perdone
Evita hablar de vuestro futuro en común (¡señal de alarma importante!)
Antes teníais muchos planes y los dos estabais igual de ilusionados. Pero ahora, cada vez que mencionas alguno de esos planes, ella cambia de tema.
It’s like she feels uncomfortable discussing it but you can’t figure out why. Could she be having second thoughts?
De todas las señales de una novia infiel, evitar temas relacionados con vuestro futuro en común seguro que parece algo de lo que preocuparse.
Se ha aficionado a un nuevo hobby al que nunca te deja acompañarla
And frankly, you’re really suspicious. Why would she keep refusing to let you give her a ride, not to mention keep her company there?
¿De repente le gusta montar a caballo o lo está utilizando como tapadera para sus actividades infieles?
Rápidamente cambia de tema cuando surge una persona en particular.
There’s this guy you’ve always had your doubts about. Maybe this is an old friend who clearly has a thing for her or a co-worker she seems too cozy with.
For whatever reason, you’ve always felt a weird vibe around him and now, whenever you mention this guy’s name, she blushes.
No matter how hard she tries not to, it’s all over her face. She feels deeply uncomfortable discussing him, and what reason could she possibly have for that?
Rara vez tiene tiempo para salir pero sus excusas no son precisamente convincentes
It’s okay if you don’t always have time to hang out but at least give a good excuse, right? Well, not according to her.
She has stopped caring about being convincing. She just blurts something out half-heartedly or says she’s too busy and that’s it.
You can see her apathy from miles away, but you keep convincing yourself that it’s all in your head (knowing very well that it’s a lie).
De repente siempre quiere saber dónde estás y todos tus movimientos.
Obviamente hay muchas señales de una novia infiel, pero querer saber tu paradero exacto se mantiene en el top ten.
You’re not a paranoid person but it totally makes sense that she’d want to know this so as not to get caught with her new partner.
You can’t even believe that you’re even saying it, but what’s the point in deluding yourself anymore?
Le echa la culpa de todos los problemas a su trabajo
Whatever fight you have or whatever complaint you have about her, it’s all work. It’s either the reason for her strange behavior or it’s what’s been keeping her on edge.
However, that’s just too convenient. We could all easily be blaming stuff on our hectic schedules but at some point, that just becomes absurd.
She clearly doesn’t even know what the hell she’s doing and she’s desperately grasping at straws, hoping you’d go for the BS. But you know better than that.
She frequently has to leave abruptly, citing a ‘friend emergency’
It’s kind of like those scenes in the movies when an on-call doctor gets paged for an ER emergency. Only she’s not a doctor and there is obviously no emergency.
Sólo una amiga siguiéndole la corriente a su mentira, ayudándola a librarse de pasar tiempo contigo.
Once, you may have even believed her but does she honestly expect you to believe that her bestie keeps having meltdowns every other day? Yeah, I didn’t think so.
Ver también: 15 Cosas que deberías poner en la lista de necesidades de tu relación de pareja
Ha empezado a vestirse de forma diferente completamente de la nada.
Not that she didn’t care about how she looked before, but now, it’s a whole new her. She’s been buying clothes that she normally doesn’t wear and splurging more than usual.
The worst thing is, she doesn’t even think that you notice these things, but how could you not? You know her better than anyone.
And naturally, you’d be the first to notice all these sure signs of something being off about her.
¿Cuánto tiempo va a seguir así y en qué momento debes hacer algo al respecto?
Cada cosa que haces ha empezado a molestarla
Este es uno de los signos más dolorosos de una novia infiel. Cada cosa que haces ha empezado a molestarla de verdad.
La forma en que masticas, cómo te sientas, tu cercanía y tus rarezas que ella solía encontrar adorables.
Now, she’s always snapping at you about the littlest things.
And you have to be honest with yourself. These things don’t just happen for no reason. Something has to be causing them.
She doesn’t want to introduce you to her new friends
She has this new crew that she’s always going on about, but so far, not even a mention of meeting them. What gives?
Could it be because she has another guy and she plans on getting rid of you? Or maybe, she just hasn’t gotten round to it yet?
It would be awesome if it was the latter, but something tells you that it’s the former.
Siempre está distraída y rara vez ofrece contacto visual.
Your previously extremely attentive girlfriend has become so distracted. You’ll ask her something, and she’ll just blurt out yes, even though it wasn’t a yes or no question.
She rarely offers eye contact and she never really seems to know where her head is at. It feels like she’s juggling a little too much and it’s really starting to affect her behavior.
You’ve found new sultry lingerie that she’s never worn for you
Al principio, te hizo mucha ilusión. Encontraste la lencería y creíste que la guardaba para una ocasión especial, así que esperaste pacientemente.
But weeks have gone by, and she still hasn’t worn them for you. I mean, what’s the point of buying lingerie that you won’t wear?
Unless she is wearing it… only not for you. You’re not really sure whether you should be heartbroken or mad or confront her about it.
She doesn’t care about being physical with you anymore
Le encantaba un buen revolcón bajo las sábanas. Estabais muy compenetrados y rara vez pasabais más de unos días sin hacerlo.
But now, she’s never in the mood. It’s like those clichés in movies. She’s either got a headache, she has to get up early or she has extra work to catch up on.
¿Dónde están sus necesidades? ¿Las satisface en otra parte? ¿Quieres saberlo?
Se pone a la defensiva cada vez que le haces una pregunta.
Las chicas que engañan aprenden a ponerse tan a la defensiva que hasta la pregunta más sencilla les parece un ataque. Presta atención a esto.
Let’s say you ask her what she was thinking of doing after work. An innocent question, right? To her (if she’s cheating), it feels like an interrogation into her whereabouts and she’s not having it.
That’s how you know that something’s going on. A girl with nothing to hide would simply say: No mucho, quiero tomar un café después? Pero una novia infiel tiene su sistema de defensa.
See also: 10 Things To Do If You’re Feeling Disrespected In A Relationship
Quiere posponer vuestra esperada escapada romántica
You’ve been looking forward to this for months! FINALLY, a whole week of just you and her spending quality time together away from the world but suddenly, she can’t go and she doesn’t even seem broken up about it.
Sabes que si ella realmente wanted to go, she’d make it work but she wants to postpone it, despite it taking you months to get it all arranged. Why would she do that unless there was someone else?
Sus mejores amigas actúan de forma extraña contigo
You can tell a lot about this situation by simply observing her best friends. They likely know everything, so if they’re being weird, cold, or distant around you, something’s up.
Sobre todo si os lleváis bien. Sólo quieren mantener las distancias, porque sabiendo lo que saben, les resulta raro estar cerca de ti.
Ha empezado a pasar mucho tiempo en el gimnasio
She never used to care about going to the gym but now, it’s her sanctuary. You’ve been together so long (you may even have survived a long-distance relationship) that you don’t care about her looking perfect.
Sabe que la quieres sea cual sea el aspecto de su cuerpo, así que ¿por qué se empeña tanto en lucir su mejor aspecto después de tanto tiempo sin importarle?
Sure, girls like to look good and feel healthy, but it seems like there’s a reason behind this transformation that she’s just not sharing.
She keeps saying, “I,” instead of, “We”
Every single, “We,” has now magically turned into, “I”… and it’s probably the most heartbreaking thing to hear.
Ya no te lleva a visitar a su familia.
Siempre la acompañabas a visitar a sus padres. Siempre era una escapada encantadora y tú tenías la mejor
tiempo. Realmente te preocupas por sus seres queridos, pero eso también se ha detenido.
She goes to visit them by herself so as not to ‘”inconvenience you’ but” she knows all too well that it’s no bother at all.
Now, you feel like a burden and that everyone knows what’s up but you.
Probablemente vaya allí y discuta la situación, haciéndote sentir aún peor de lo que ya te sientes.
23. Todos sus aparatos están bloqueados
You’re not sure if she ever locked her phone and gadgets before but she sure is doing it now. It’s like deleting her browser history isn’t enough.
She is making sure to not get caught and she’s covering all fronts.
When she’s upset, she doesn’t turn to you to console her (like she always used to do)
When she’s upset or sad, you were her shoulder to cry on. You always know what to say and you always manage to make her laugh.
That was one of your favorite things about your relationship but ever since you got the impression that she is a cheater, you’ve stopped being her go-to person.
O ya no tiene días malos (muy poco probable) o hay alguien nuevo que la sostiene en sus peores momentos.
Tu instinto te dice que ella quiere romper...
You know your gut has never failed you before. Whenever you get a feeling about something, it turns out to be right. And no matter how much you want to ignore it, you can’t.
You have to believe that your gut feeling knows what’s up. It’s heartbreaking to think your girl is fooling around, but you have to be real.
Isn’t it better to face the music and give yourself a chance for something real? The sooner you do it, the sooner the pain will stop.
Lucha por luchar
Ella está constantemente buscando peleas. Esto es lo que las parejas infieles hacen con el fin de hacer usted romper con ellos. Inteligente, ¿eh? De esa manera, consiguen la salida fácil.
However, my advice is, don’t fall for it. Don’t give her the satisfaction of ending it for her. If she really wants to break up, she might as well do it the right way.
You deserve to hear the whole truth; after all, you’re the one hurting here. The least she can do is be honest and apologize for things.
Nothing can change what she did, but it’s going to help you heal after hearing her it from the horse’s mouth.
Véase también: El ciclo de relaciones push-pull y cómo superar esta dinámica
She doesn’t laugh at your corny jokes anymore
You know you’re no Dave Chappelle, but you do have your own special comedic charm. And your girlfriend was your biggest fan before.
So what if your comedic timing wasn’t the best? That’s what made you so funny. At least that’s what she always thought, hasta hace poco.
Now, you can’t get a glimpse of a smile from her, not even when you genuinely try to make her laugh; she barely forces herself to react.
And if you can’t laugh together anymore, what do you really have?
Esto fue lo tuyo and now, you’re afraid that there’s someone else making her laugh.
Se ha vuelto fría, distante y desinteresada en su relación.
Ultimately, her entire demeanor has become cold and distant. She’s no longer invested. She simply goes with the flow.
It’s like she’s there but her passion and adoration are long gone. The thing that made your relationship so special has withered.
She is now someone you merely spend time with but things have changed significantly. Now, it seems like she’d rather be en cualquier lugar sino aquí.
¿Qué hacer en el futuro?
Permítete sentir lo que sea que estés sintiendo en este momento
First and foremost, feel your feelings. Don’t pretend to be above it all. If you feel like crying, cry. If you feel like shouting, shout.
But whatever you do, don’t keep your feelings bottled up. Believe me, eventually, you’re going to explode and the worst thing for you is pretending that you’re okay.
Learning that your significant other is a cheater is a big blow. A few months back, you were planning on moving in together, and now, you’re figuring out why you’re no longer enough.
Date tiempo para sentirlo todo antes de decidirte a atacarla. El tiempo está de tu parte.
Abstente de tomar decisiones importantes cuando te encuentres en una situación tan vulnerable.
One of the worst things people in pain can do is make life-changing decisions. Think about it. Right now, you’re at an all-time low.
You’re clearly not in the right frame of mind to be making cualquier decisiones y todo lo que hagas mientras sufres se volverá en tu contra. Así que ve con calma.
No matter how much you want to break up, throw her stuff out the window or talk shit about her, don’t. I promise you’ll regret it.
Wait it out until you’re sure that you can live with that decision and be okay with it in the long run.
Don’t even think about blaming yourself
It’s not your fault. If you were struggling or having any issues, the only right thing to do was talk about it. Cheating is never the way.
So if she tries to blame you for being the cheating partner, nip it in the bud. You are both adults and you should’ve had the tough conversation if she wanted to break up.
Pero desde que decidió ir por el camino del engaño, toda la culpa es suya.
Nobody forced her to sleep with someone else so don’t you dare blame yourself for her lousy actions.
Considera todas tus opciones antes de enfrentarte a ella
¿Quieres romper? ¿Quieres hablarlo? ¿Necesitas tiempo para resolverlo todo?? Asegúrate de saberlo antes de enfrentarte a ella.
Lo mejor es que entiendas a dónde quieres llegar antes de que ella tenga la oportunidad de llenarte la cabeza de tonterías.
Prepare yourself mentally before the conversation, so you find it easier to stay true to what you really need. Don’t let her sway you.
Rodéate de buenos amigos que te ayuden a darle sentido a esto
¿Sabes cuál es la mejor medicina para un corazón roto? Un buen círculo de amigos íntimos.
After all, they are the ones who’ll be there when your partner leaves. They are the ones who’ll pick up the pieces and make you breakfast when you don’t want to get up in the morning.
Those people will be the ones helping you find a way out of this mess. Remember, they want only the best for you. So be sure to listen to their advice. They know what they’re talking about.
Véase también: Una relación disfuncional: Qué es y cómo reconocer las señales
Habla con tu novia infiel y mira lo que tiene que decir
Once you’ve done some soul-searching, talked to your best friends, and got your bearings, you may proceed to talk to your partner.
First, let her know how this whole thing has made you feel. Do not let her lead the conversation. She is the one in the wrong and she should be happy that you’re willing to have a calm discussion.
Ask her whatever you want to know and don’t let her leave out any details. You deserve to know how much of a fool she has made out of you.
Only after the conversation should you start making a final decision regarding your relationship. Find out all the facts and do what’s best for usted.
Acude a tu médico y hazte pruebas de ITS
Este es un paso desafortunado, pero realmente necesita hacerse la prueba. No importa lo que diga (era sólo un tipo y ella jura que llevaba protección), nunca se puede jugar con la salud.
Go do what you need to do and be sure that you haven’t contracted any diseases.
Trust me, it’ll give you a peace of mind knowing at least one honest thing came out of her mouth about her cheating escapades.
Nunca permitas que esto cambie tu percepción de ti mismo
Esto no se refleja en ti de ninguna manera. La forma en que los demás deciden comportarse es cosa suya, de nadie más. Repítetelo a ti mismo.
It doesn’t mean that you’re not enough. Her cheating on you doesn’t make you any less of a man. And it definitely doesn’t mean that some other girl won’t cherish you.
La única persona a la que esto perjudica es a tu novia y, te diga lo que te diga, recuérdalo siempre.
Deja a tu pareja si no se disculpa
If your cheater of a girlfriend doesn’t seem extremely apologetic and with really good reasoning (not that there is any), just leave.
Volver con un infiel rara vez es la decisión correcta.
Hay casos concretos en los que podrías considerarlo (fue sólo una vez, estaba más que borracha y es destripado about what she did) but if it happened on a regular basis and she is only sorry because she got caught, I’m sorry but what are you still doing with her?
I know that love can really mess with your head but don’t let it blind you to the point of letting her treat you unfairly twice.
Deja de permitir que nadie te trate mal (ya sea ella o una nueva pareja)
After deciding what your next move is, turn over a new leaf and let this be the start of something better. If you’ve decided to stay with her, I hope that you thought it through.
No matter what, from now on, don’t let anyone treat you badly. No more shady stuff, lousy excuses or secretive behavior.
It’s all cards on the table or you’re out.
Once, it was a mistake but the second time, it is a choice. Complete transparency is the only way to go from here, and it’s no negociable.
10 cosas que debes EVITAR después de que tu pareja te engañe
Don’t publicly trash-talk your cheating partner
Even though these signs of a cheating girlfriend can be overwhelming, you should under no circumstances stoop to her level. You’re better than that.
Entiende que hablar mal de ella en público o en las redes sociales sólo te hará quedar como el malo de la película y le ayudará a ganarse su simpatía.
My mom always told me to keep all issues between our four walls and when you feel like shouting it from the rooftops the most, that’s precisely when you should remain quiet.
Within a few weeks, once this initial fury and frustration withers, you’ll be extremely thankful you were able to keep it private.
Don’t allow yourself to fall into a downward spiral
Okay, so right now, after having confirmed that your girlfriend has betrayed you and trying to figure out where to place your anger, you’re probably at your wit’s end.
That’s totally expected. How else could a person feel upon finding out that their life partner is fooling around? But here’s the thing…
Permítete sentirlo todo, pero en cuanto empieces a notar que las cosas se están descontrolando, llama a tu mejor amigo. Ve a visitar a tus padres. Pasea a tu perro (si tienes).
These things will help you regain your perspective and prevent you from being a victim of your own emotions. Find your safe haven and don’t let yourself fall too deep.
If you have children, don’t get them involved in your mess
Your kids (provided you have any) are innocent in all of this. Don’t make them feel your mutual anger and don’t make them pick sides.
Children are sacred and they should never sense a father’s wrath toward their mother or vice versa. When it comes to them, be sure to never yell or scream at each other when they’re near.
One day, they’ll remember it all and have really ugly memories of their parents being at each other’s throats.
Don’t taint their memories. Keep it civil and let them know that they are not to blame for anything. Let them feel your love now more than ever.
Don’t negate what happened and just hope things will magically be okay
La negación es tu enemigo. Lo que ocurrió entre vosotros dos fue muy real y no tiene sentido negarlo. Todas esas horas tardías y el comportamiento extraño eran por una razón.
According to renowned psychologist Dr. Paul Coleman, PsyD, “Someone who must ‘work late’ all of a sudden at times that go beyond a reasonable explanation may be cheating.”
So don’t do yourself a disservice and deny the obvious. Things are kind of messed up right now but they will pick up eventually. Just be honest with yourself.
Don’t overplay the victim card
This might sound rather harsh but it’s for your own good.
If you acquire a victim mentality, it’s going to be hard to snap out of it so instead, pick yourself up, brush it all off and keep your head high. Your girlfriend is the one who did something bad, not you.
Don’t let her make you feel overly victimized, as she’s not worthy of such a substantial effect on you. You know that you’ll get over this.
It won’t happen overnight, but one morning, you’ll wake up and realize that you’re finally starting to be okay. And that is going to feel priceless.
Don’t let anyone but you decide your next course of action
Nobody but you gets to tell you how you’re going to move forward. Whether you break up, decide to forgive her, or take some time to think it through, it’s all up to you.
This is your relationship and your life. Don’t let anyone affect your decision because you’re the one who’s going to have to live with it.
Ver también: Reconocer y romper el patrón perseguidor y distanciador en una relación
Don’t refuse to see a therapist right off the bat
Seeing a clinical psychologist or anyone with a Ph.D. in mental health might prove to be the best decision you’ve ever made for yourself. They can help you resolve your issues in the healthiest ways.
Cualquier problema que puedas tener, créeme, están equipados para manejarlo. Vi a uno hace unos años y me ayudó a recuperarme.
There is no shame in deciding to help yourself and whoever makes you feel that way doesn’t have your best interests at heart.
Don’t forget about the importance of taking care of yourself
While you’re hurting, don’t forget that you deserve some tender love and care. You deserve to feel loved and appreciated so don’t deny yourself an opportunity to do something that can help your well-being.
Surround yourself with close friends and don’t do anything that drags you down.
Es tu momento de brillar. Deja que esta experiencia te convierta en la persona que quieres ser.
I’m fairly certain that you are craving some much-deserved love and warmth.
Don’t rush things, not everyone heals the same way
No todo el mundo reaccionará de la misma manera ante estas señales de una novia infiel. Algunos perderán la cabeza, otros se quedarán paralizados y otros tardarán meses en asimilarlo.
But guess what? There’s no time limit on how long it takes to get over heartbreak. However long it takes, that’s how it should be.
Take your time and don’t worry about what anyone might think. You deserve to feel like yourself again, no matter when that is.
Todas las personas son muy diferentes y sería muy inusual que todo el mundo sanara de la misma manera y al mismo ritmo.
Don’t be too hard on yourself, your partner’s actions don’t define you
Lastly, take it easy on yourself. Don’t be too harsh on yourself because there truly wasn’t anything you could’ve done differently.
Those who want to cheat will do so regardless of how attentive or caring you are. Please understand that her behavior doesn’t define you in any way.
She made a conscious decision to play with your heart and that’s entirely on her. Don’t take part in her blame because it doesn’t belong to you.
Lo único que puedes hacer es seguir siendo tú mismo y tratar a los demás con amabilidad y respeto. Creo firmemente que el karma se encargará del resto.
En conclusión
If you’ve realized that these signs of a cheating girlfriend hit too close to home, it’s time for a really difficult decision.
Your next steps depend on your partner’s (lack of) apology, her reasoning and your gut feeling. Is this person worth a second chance or has she crossed the line?
Espero sinceramente que mi exhaustiva investigación sobre el tema haya facilitado un poco esta desgarradora decisión. Recuerde que nadie lo consigue menos tú.
Reevaluate your situation and see where your heart is, but don’t let yourself fall for the same tricks again. Let this experience be your guiding light from now on.
Lo último que quieres es que te vuelvan a engañar. Te mereces una relación duradera y comprometida con alguien que te respete demasiado como para andar con tonterías.
Así que pregúntese lo siguiente: After everything you’ve been through, can your girlfriend really give you that?
