¿Todavía le quiero? 5 señales claras de que es hora de dejarlo ir

¿Todavía lo amo ¿o sólo me quedo con él por razones prácticas y de conveniencia?

Es una pregunta que me he hecho bastantes veces en la vida y ni una sola vez me resultó fácil afrontar los hechos.

Breakups are just the worst, and I have to say, there have been times where I deluded myself into thinking it was a smart idea to stay in a doomed relationship just so I wouldn’t have to go through all that inevitable heartbreak.

I mean, who in this world wouldn’t do everything in their power to try and salvage a relationship that you feel has potential to go the distance?

Nothing is perfect, no relationship is without its glitches and faults, so why wouldn’t you work on saving it instead of just abandono a la primera señal de problemas y decidir que ya no le quieres?

Por desgracia para mí, siempre resultaba que mi instinto estaba en lo cierto.

De algún modo, siempre me indicaba que debía dejarlo, pero mi testarudo trasero lo ignoraba, esperando que de algún modo estuviera equivocado.

Si ahora mismo estás pasando por este dilema imposible y te preguntas constantemente, “¿Todavía le quiero? ¿o sólo estoy prolongando lo inevitable?” just listen to what your gut feeling is telling you.

Tu corazón siempre va a querer quedarse y hacer ejercicio tus problemas.

Al fin y al cabo, hay tanto amor, tanta historia y tantos buenos momentos entre vosotros que sería una tontería dejarlo estar. Pero hay momentos en los que simplemente lo sabes. En el fondo, tienes la respuesta.

You’ve just buried it so deep, hoping it wouldn’t resurface and you could keep living your fantasy, avoiding the harsh reality that has come upon you.

Nadie puede culparte. Todos queremos ser felices para siempre y todos haríamos lo que fuera necesario para encontrarlo y conservarlo.

But sometimes what you don’t realize is that what you are actually doing is sacrificing your happiness and your joy.

Te estás negando tu derecho a ser verdaderamente feliz al permanecer en una relación en la que no te sientes realizado.

Don’t settle for mediocre love. Don’t settle for broken communication and half the effort on his part.

Don’t stay where you don’t feel like your authentic self and where your spirit is crushed.  Te debes a ti mismo encontrar a esa persona que te da vértigo por dentro.

And if your current partner is not doing that, you’re with the wrong person, and that’s okay!

You are still a good person if where you currently are isn’t where you want to stay forever. You are the only one who knows what sparks joy in you.

If your gut is telling you that you’re not where you’re meant to be, listen to it! It’s almost always right.

If you’re wondering whether you still love him or if you should finally suéltalo, here are 5 signs that point out it’s time for you to move on to better things:

Vuestras peleas se han vuelto demasiado frecuentes e intensas

Todas las parejas se pelean. Arguments are a normal occurrence in healthy long-term relationship because they are a way to get your partner to see things from your point of view and to get them to understand where you’re coming from.

It is not a way to make the other partner feel bad about themselves or kick them while they’re down. You’re going to fight. That’s a fact.

But what matters is that you do it with some ground rules that ensure that you’re actually trying to make things better without worsening the situation or diminishing your partner’s feelings.

En primer lugar, asegúrate de que la dirección de tu discusión es hacia una solución conjunta con el mínimo daño para tu relación.

Sin golpes bajos. Nada de sacar a relucir viejos argumentos (resueltos) sólo para demostrar tu punto de vista.

Focus on the problem at hand and nothing else. Secondly, try to see things from your partner’s perspective.

Try to understand what he’s trying to tell you and always keep in mind that he is not trying to herirte.

Simplemente intenta que veas las cosas de otra manera. Las discusiones no son excusa para ser abusivo de ninguna manera.

They are not an excuse to make your partner feel like shit and violate their trust. If this is what your relationship has come to, it’s time to take a break.

Hay cero esfuerzo de su parte para hacer que funcione

You can love him all you want, but when you’re the only one actively putting in effort and working on your relationship while he’s just sliding along, it’s time to rethink this whole thing.

When you realize that he doesn’t even ask how you are anymore nor does he try to do the little things that would go a long way, now that is a sign of a broken relationship.

You can still love him, but when he can’t be bothered to equally participate in the partnership you’re both in, he’s not worth your time.

No esforzarse y ni siquiera preocuparse por hacerlo es una clara señal de falta de respeto.

You can make all the excuses you want for him, but when a man loves you, he’s not just going to sit there while you’re busting your ass trying to fix things.

Un hombre que te quiere no va a dejar que seas la única invertida en vuestra relación porque sabe lo doloroso que es sentirse sola cuando más bien deberías sentirte respaldada por tu hombre.

And quite frankly, if he isn’t trying, he probably doesn’t even care enough about you anyway.

Take that as your biggest sign to leave, and don’t ever think about settling for this treatment again.

In this situation, even if you do still love him, he’s just not the guy for you. Recognize that, respect yourself enough, and let him go.

You don’t say “I love you” anymore

Naturally, you don’t need to say those three words all the time in order for them to be true.

After a while, you both just feel it so intensely, that there’s no need to throw it around as much.

Pero no hay necesidad de insistir. El amor está ahí y los dos lo sabéis.

But when you notice that you can’t remember the last time you heard him say “Te quiero” or vice versa, now that’s a sign that you should start worrying about your relationship and joint future.

If you don’t feel the need to say it to him anymore, start wondering why that is.

Normalmente, cuando dejas de sentir lo que solías sentir, poco a poco dejas de decirlo sin darte cuenta.

And if this is the case on both parts, that could be a sign that you’re both falling out of love.

Try saying it to him and pay attention to how it makes you feel.  If you have to force it and it doesn’t really feel natural, you may no longer feel it.

Cuando tienes que presionarte para expresar tu amor a tu pareja, lo más probable es que el amor ya no exista.

Cuanto antes lo admitas, mejor te sentirás cuando te desprendas de lo que ya no te hace crecer.

La relación se ha convertido más en una rutina

There is nothing better than finding that one person you want to spend every waking moment with and experience everything life has to offer by each other’s side.

Waking up together and facing life’s challenges just seems better when you’re together.

Granted, there are going to be days that won’t feel like such a rush of emotions where you can’t wait to see them, but even on those days you’ll know that it’s all normal and you still love him just as much as you did before.

However, when your relationship feels like it’s en la rutina and there is no more excitement to see each other, talk about all the things that have happened to you that day, and you don’t even feel the need to change it, you might have a problem.

When things become boring, there is nothing that makes you happy about going home to him, and you don’t even feel like that’s a problem, your relationship may have just become nothing but a daily routine.

You might even avoid intimacy to the point where snuggling together doesn’t even sound appealing anymore.

Sólo tienes relaciones sexuales ciertos días, e incluso entonces, tienes que obligarte a hacerlo.

It’s not that he’s pressuring you, more like it’s become a robotic routine that you feel you should do at times, even though the need is no longer there.

Love is not supposed to feel like a routine, so if you feel this has become your reality, it’s time to end it ASAP.

When you think about your future, he’s simply not in it

Ésta es la señal más clara de todas. Es natural imaginar lo que te depara el futuro, y cuando eso ocurre, si tu pareja simplemente no está ahí, entonces probablemente tengas una buena razón para marcharte.

If you’ve been in a relationship for a while, it is perfectly normal to think about your joint future and how you plan to level up in your relationship.

But if you don’t feel like he belongs in your life for the long haul, you probably shouldn’t even be asking yourself if you still love him. You clearly don’t!

El hombre al que amas y con el que quieres estar mucho tiempo es alguien que estaría en primera línea de tus planes de futuro.

Pero si tienes que obligarte a colocarlo en tus pensamientos sobre el futuro, probablemente las cosas vayan mejor si romper con él.

It doesn’t mean there is something wrong with him, it simply means that your relationship has run its course and it’s time to move on to better things!

Don’t feel bad. Anything that’s not making you happy or fulfilled doesn’t belong in your life.

Better things will come along and when you find the one who’s supposed to be in your life for good, you’ll just know because you’ll never have to wonder about him.