OMG, she’s so hot, smart, and beautiful. She would never notice me even if my picture were stuck on her forehead (wait, that doesn’t even make sense, but okay.) Maybe I should just say a simple hello…
Hmm, maybe playing hard to get is not a bad idea after all. But what if she doesn’t like playing games? Maybe women like simple men. There’s no way I’ll ever make a move on this girl if I continue complicating things.
Raise your hand if you’ve ever been in this situation. (And I thought so.) I bet millions of men experience such overthinking on a daily basis (especially those who are shy by nature).
Before I write anything else, I have a question for you: What do you think about a girl making the first move?
Even though I’m a girl myself, I have no problems making the first move if I really like the guy and notice that he’s a little bit reserved or shy. I mean, we live in the 21st century when gender stereotyping shouldn’t even exist!
So, if you’re a guy lucky enough to run into a girl like me who doesn’t have a problem with making the first move, then congratulations! But, if you’re not, learning how to make a move on a girl the right way is the only way!
How can you tell if she wants you to make a move?
Before you decide to approach a girl and impress her with your skills, it’s advisable that you first learn if she wants you to make a move at all.
Girls are complex beings. Sometimes, they can send you tons of mixed signals and leave you totally confused in the best-case scenario.
We certainly don’t want that to happen. So, what do you need to do to find out if that one girl actually wants you to approach her?
You need to pay attention to these subtle signs that she wants you to make a move:
- She’s approachable, warm, and open to you.
- There are plenty of subtle touches.
- She maintains deep eye contact.
If she feels relaxed and has that ‘happy vibe’ when in your company, this is a great sign. If she’s a little bit flirty with her words and overall behavior, know that she’s totally interested in you.
A girl who doesn’t want you to make a move will act like it.
She will ignore your texts (most of the time) or invest minimal effort when texting back. She will certainly not be interested in getting to know you better, so she will not ask you questions.
These are the things that you need to pay attention to, so make sure to take note. Observe her body language, texting patterns, and all those little things that can say a lot about her intentions, and you’ll be just fine.
Making a move on a girl is not quantum physics, but you need to learn the basics!
I have this weird feeling that the media likes to make certain topics look complex only to confuse the readers.
They even go one step further and invent new terms that don’t even exist, only to make you feel incapable and dependent on their virtual help.
This article is not about that. It’s not about representing ‘making the first move’ as something complicated or “unreachable” to regular guys out there.
From my female point of view, I can tell you one thing: Making a move on a girl is ACTUALLY very simple.
And if it is not simple, then she’s not worthy of you approaching her. Yup, I just said that, and I’m really proud of that new hypothesis of mine.
The truth is, you can successfully approach any woman out there, be it in real life or virtually, and all you need is one thing, and that is CONFIDENCE (and an internet connection, of course, if you choose the latter).
Now, what does it mean to be confident? No, it doesn’t mean having a perfect body, trendy hairstyle, and a six-figure salary. You can be confident even if you’re broke, have a dad bod, and no hair at all.
These are only external factors that can help but are not crucial when it comes to attracting women. So, the thing you need to focus on is:
What do women find attractive about you?
What is that one thing (or things) that women might find attractive about you? What are your hobbies (if you have any), interests, personality traits?
What are the things that you can offer to her that would add value to her life? (and I don’t mean only financially).
Like every human being on the planet, your set of skills and personality traits are unique. There isn’t another you out there. So, what you need to do is CONVINCE that one girl you like that you are exactly what she needs in her life.
When it comes to making the first move, think of it as advertising. You are both the advertiser and the product you want to sell. Basically, you are selling yourself (no matter how weird it sounds).
So, how does one sell themselves without being too obvious, rude, or pushy?
First of all, you need to keep in mind that the main thing a woman wants in a man is him being DIFFERENT from the rest. Do you think you can be that or show her that? I bet you can!
If you want to make a great first impression and win over that girl, do the following:
Intrigue her
If you’re planning on approaching her in the virtual world, then you need to make sure that your profile looks intriguing enough for her to decide to text you back.
To save you the trouble, I’ll tell you what kind of profiles DON’T look interesting at all:
- Having a profile picture of your car. (Yes, we understand that you’re a car lover, but you don’t have to display it everywhere.)
- Having repetitive pictures of yourself. (If drinking with your buddies is the only thing you ever do, how interesting are you actually?)
- Overdoing it with gym pictures. (Yes, it’s good to know that you take good care of your physical appearance, but what about your personality?)
If I don’t stop myself right here, I’m afraid I never will. So, what you need to pay attention to, both virtually and in the real world is: Don’t be boring or predictable.
Intrigue her by being a true gentleman or by showing off interests in various things and not only drinking beer with your friends. In other words:
DON’T be generic
Don’t be one of those guys who sends something like this every single time: Hey, how are you? What are you up to? These sentences scream BORING (especially if you’re overusing them).
Let’s say that you’re approaching a girl on the street. What would you say to her? How are you?
Well, that’s not a bad idea for starters, but you would have much bigger chances of impressing her if you said something like: Where did you buy that bracelet?
It doesn’t matter if you’re really interested in her bracelet or not. What matters is that you’ve noticed it!
You can pretend that you’re thinking about buying the same bracelet for your mother, sister, or best friend for their birthday, and that’s the reason why you’re asking her in the first place.
Remember what we said about advertising? In this way, you are selling yourself indirectly. You are capturing her attention, showing her how thoughtful you are, and you are impressing her.
After the bracelet thing, you can ask her if she wants to go for a drink or something similar. She will never know that this was actually your main goal. Indirect approaches are usually the best ways to ask a girl out.
Try to be mysterious
Don’t tell her everything about yourself too soon. Leave her guessing. Don’t be an open book. Instead, focus on listening to her more because, let’s be honest, women LOVE to talk a lot (except me).
You can certainly not go wrong by letting her talk, but don’t be passive either. Ask her some sub-questions, make her laugh.
Make her feel good!
Let her know that you want to get to know her better. Don’t be one of those low-effort guys waiting for a girl to do everything. Take the initiative, roll up your sleeves, and win her!
“Life is a game board. Time is your opponent. If you procrastinate, you will lose the game. You must make a move to be victorious.” – Napoleon Hill
So, what are you waiting for? Now that you know the basics of making a move like a boss don’t wait any longer.
Be different. Be confident. Be victorious!