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I Thought You Cared For Me But Obviously I Was Wrong

I Thought You Cared For Me But Obviously I Was Wrong

When I first met you, I expected much of what would happen in our relationship. But I don’t want you to tell me that I’d been developing those expectations on my own and without any backup. The truth is that you were acting like the most perfect guy from day one. The truth is that you’d been telling me everything I needed to hear until you got in my pants and under my skin.

And that was when you showed your true colors. That was when you showed how wrong I was about you. That was when I realized how great of an actor you had actually been all along and when you showed me I was wrong for believing that you honestly cared about me the way I cared about you. That was when I realized that everything I thought of you was a big, fat lie.

I thought you were ready to compromise,but it turned out you were just another selfish asshole. I thought you were someone who was ready to meet my needs and to meet me halfway, someone who understood how mature relationships worked. But in the end, you showed me that you were only a self-centered egomaniac who did only the things that suited him. You showed me that you were only looking out for your own interests, instead of doing everything for the sake of our relationship, the way I did. You showed me that my well-being was never important to you and that you never took into consideration my emotions and how your actions affected me or our relationship.

I thought you were going to treat me as your priority but it turned out I was just one of your options. From the moment we met, you tried very hard to convince me that I was becoming the most important person to you in the world and that nothing and nobody could be more important than me. But after a while, I started noticing that I was falling down your priority list. All of a sudden, everything and everybody became more important than me. All of a sudden, our plans would be rescheduled and you were always too busy to hear me out or to see me. At the same time, you acted like you always had to be my first choice and you expected me to always put you first.  

I thought you were going to put some effort into our relationship but it turned out you expected me to move the stars for you while you weren’t ready to lift your little finger for me. I thought our relationship meant as much to you as it meant to me. But after a while, I saw I was the only one initiating our dates, the one calling and texting you first and the only one pulling all the strings. After some time, I started feeling as if I was forcing you to be with me and that was something I never wanted.

I thought you were someone I could rely on but it turned out that you were only around me while you needed me. You knew you could always count on my support and for me that was the natural order of things since we had been a couple. But with time, you started using my kindness and you started taking advantage of the fact that I was always there for you. You kept calling me only when you were in trouble or when you needed something, because you knew I was the only one who would never turn her back on you. But the second everything in your life was fixed and the second you were back on track, you would forget all about me, as if I never existed. At the same time, you were never there for me when I needed you. My problems and issues were seen as irrelevant and as things I could handle on my own.

But most of all, I thought you were someone who would finally treat me the way I deserved to be treated and someone who would love me the way I loved you. But it turned out that all of our relationship was just a huge deception and that you never felt honest love for me. And that is something I could never forgive you forfor lying and deceiving me into thinking we were something bigger.