10 cose essenziali da fare prima della vostra prossima relazione

Iniziare una nuova relazione dopo un colpo di fulmine è un po' difficile. Bisogna dedicare molto tempo e sforzi per risorgere dalle ceneri e andare avanti.

Forse avete subito abusi o manipolazioni in una relazione passata che vi hanno portato ad avere problemi di fiducia, ma credete che incontrare qualcuno di nuovo e iniziare una nuova relazione possa aiutarvi a guarire.

Because of the reason that starting a new relationship when you’re not ready for it can only break you even more, there are a few things that you should consider before you decide that you want a serious relationship again.

1. Guarire

I know that it’s easier said than done but no matter how much time it takes you, you have to heal!

By starting a new relationship when you’re this broken, you can only break your own heart or the heart of your new partner. It doesn’t bring anything good to anyone.

Inoltre, you can’t expect your partner to help you heal. That’s your job! You are the only one to whom you should go for advice on healing to become happy with yourself.

2. Concedetevi del tempo

Don’t rush it! Give yourself all the time that’s needed in order to be sure that you are finally over your ex. There’s no need to rush into the next relationship because it simply won’t bring you anything good.

You won’t be prepared for the commitment and all the things that come together with a new relationship. So why jump into it?

Give yourself time to do all the things you weren’t able to do while you were in your previous relationship.

3. Diventare chi avete sempre voluto essere

You probably have a picture of the perfect woman in your mind. That woman isn’t someone the media presents you as but your own unique version of someone you want to become.

Perciò, dateci dentro! Diventate la donna cazzuta che avete sempre voluto essere.

Seguite la vostra passione, trovate un lavoro fantastico, continuate gli studi, indossate tutti i vestiti folli che volete. Vi assicuro che ci sarà qualcuno che si innamorerà di voi proprio come voi amate voi stessi.

4. Diventare indipendenti

Imparare a catturare un ragno da soli. Imparare a cambiare una gomma. Pagare da soli tutti i pasti.

Prendere decisioni importanti nella vostra vita. Fate tutte queste cose per dimostrare a voi stessi che you don’t actually need a man ma che ne volete uno.

Becoming independent means that you are ready to live your life with or without a man—because you will be able to take care of yourself.

5. Appuntamento con se stessi

I know that you can’t find someone who will know exactly what you want in a relationship but you can come close to it by knowing it yourself.

Cosa serve per farvi sentire felici, amati e apprezzati? Potete saperlo solo uscendo con voi stessi.

Portatevi fuori a cena e cercate i vostri ristoranti preferiti. Compratevi dei fiori e del cioccolato.

Conoscete veramente voi stessi, i vostri desideri e le vostre esigenze, in modo da poter dire cosa volete in una relazione la prossima volta che qualcuno ve lo chiede.

6. Trascorrere del tempo con gli amici

Now is the right time to catch up with all of your friends you didn’t have the time for before. Go on road trips together, have a shoulder to lean on and a support group.

Ridere! Uscire e ubriacarsi con loro.

If you look hard enough, you’ll see that you aren’t alone in this world. Your friends will show you that there is life after heartbreak and that they are there for you whenever you truly need them.

7. Fare un elenco delle cose sbagliate

One day, when you have enough time, just sit down and write a list of all the things you think that you did wrong in the relationship. Don’t be harsh on yourself but instead be rather realistic.

By doing this you will know which aspects of your behavior in relationships you have to work on. If you always care too much and you end up spoiling your partner then I think that it’s finally time to find a way to not do it again.

8. Chiedetevi perché volete avere una relazione.

Do you think that you’re just trying to convince yourself? Ti senti solo?

Do you think that it’s easier to be in a relationship? Or maybe you don’t have a reason for it at all?

If you can’t convince yourself with the answers of why you want to be in a relationship again, if it’s not reason enough, then don’t. You’ll be happier that you didn’t start a relationship before you were actually ready.

9. Incontri occasionali

Just see how you will react to casual dating. Don’t let them into your home, don’t have sex, just dinner.

Dating is OK, because you’re not rushing into a new relationship but rather you’re having some fun with people you find to be interesting. There is a difference.

10. Perdonare

Don’t rush into the next relationship still carrying the weight of the previous one. There’s no need for you to hold grudges.

Rather let go and forgive. I know that it’s hard, I know that if he deserved to be forgiven you would still be together. But forgive.

Il vostro petto si sentirà più leggero. Perdonate tutti gli errori commessi nella vostra relazione e continuate la vostra vita senza alcun peso da portare. Ve lo meritate.