A causa tua, non credo più nel lieto fine

I used to be this innocent little girl who always believed in love. I believed in people and I believed in the power of good. And most of all, I believed in the power of love. Although everyone around me kept telling me I was foolish and naive and that I was living in a dream, I didn’t allow anyone to shatter my own reality. People kept calling me a hopeless, old-fashioned romantic but that didn’t bother me much. I knew I would find my soulmate, someone who I would spend the rest of my life with.

When I say I believed in love, I am not trying to tell you that I thought love was perfect. I didn’t think my Prince Charming would come to my rescue and I knew love wasn’t always a bed of roses. But what I did believe in was that love could conquer everyone and everything that was in its way. I believed that everything was possible and achievable if love between two people was strong and honest enough.

I hoped there would come a man who wouldn’t wouldn’t be perfect but who would be perfettamente imperfetto for me. A man who would love me despite all my flaws and who would make all of life’s difficulties look easy. A man who would love me unconditionally and who would appreciate and respect me accordingly. A guy who wouldn’t be an immature boy but a real gentleman at all times. A man who would be my happily ever after and who would give me my happy ending that I knew I deserved.

E credevo davvero che quest'uomo avrebbe incrociato la mia strada. Potreste dire che avevo aspettative irrealistiche e che vivevo in una favola, ma non ho mai voluto far parte di questo moderno concetto di appuntamento. Sono sempre stata una ragazza da tutto o niente e mi sono rifiutata di accontentarmi di poco.

Finché non ho incontrato te.

When you came into my life, you shattered all my beliefs into pieces. You represented everything I didn’t like in people and everything opposite to me. You were a man who didn’t believe in love and you made that very clear from the start. You were a man who thought he could rely on himself only and a man who didn’t get attached easily. But silly me didn’t believe any of this. I thought you needed to be loved for real and that it would make you realize that love really was the most important thing in the world. I knew I was a loving and caring girl and I thought I could prove you wrong. I was determined to show you what you were missing out on because you kept yourself protected from love.

I’ll never know what you saw in me or what attracted me to you. I guess we both thought we could change each other’s views or that we could meet each other halfway.

Ma purtroppo non è mai successo. Prima che me ne rendessi conto, tutti i miei standard e le mie forti relazioni che rompono le scatole erano ormai lontani. Sei riuscito a cambiare l'essenza di chi ero e di tutto ciò in cui credevo.

Non ci siamo mai incontrati a metà strada, ma tu mi hai cambiato. I suffered a lot with you, because you never loved me the way I wanted to be loved. But I don’t blame you for that. I respect the fact that you were honest from the start and the fact that you never promised me much. But that didn’t prevent me from expecting much.

I don’t even blame you for walking away from me. Eri una persona che non ha mai saputo stare ed è una cosa di cui sono sempre stata consapevole, per quanto abbia cercato di combatterla.

Ma il fatto è che hai cambiato l'essenza di ciò che ero. Mi hai reso proprio come te. Mi hai trasformato in una donna negativa e piena di amarezza.

Grazie a te, Ho perso fiducia nelle persone che mi circondano e soprattutto negli uomini. Da quando te ne sei andato, ho capito che potevo fidarmi completamente solo di me stesso. Ho capito che la maggior parte delle persone sono egoiste, non importa quanto tu dia loro.

Grazie a te, I don’t believe in love or in fairy tales anymore. Ora, so che a volte l'amore non è sufficiente. Ora, so che non c'è nulla che si possa fare per farsi amare da qualcuno.

E soprattutto, I don’t believe in happy endings anymore. I don’t think we are all destined to have them. And I don’t believe that mine awaits me.