18 segni che tua moglie vuole lasciarti e come salvare il tuo matrimonio

The moment you start looking for warning signs that your wife wants to leave you, it’s high time to take serious action.

Il vostro matrimonio potrebbe essere ancora salvabile, ma prima dovete guardare la cosa dal suo punto di vista e riflettere su perché le cose hanno iniziato a precipitare.

Married couples go through so much together so it’s perfectly normal to hit a few bumps.

Dopo aver trascorso molto tempo costantemente insieme, ci volontà un po' di attrito.

L'unica domanda che ci si pone è: si possono sistemare le cose dopo tanti anni di matrimonio o i problemi sono ormai troppo radicati?

Scopri i cattivi segnali che indicano che tua moglie è intenzionata a divorziare da te, le indicazioni che ti indicano che sei pronto per questo passo e i consigli per salvare il tuo matrimonio!

Vedi anche: Vi sentite poco amati? Ecco i possibili motivi e come cambiare la situazione

18 segnali rivelatori del fatto che vostra moglie vuole il divorzio

She’s become emotionally detached

Your emotional connection has been severed. You’ve been feeling it for some time now but you’ve been hesitant to face it head-on.

You can’t remember the last time she said Ti amo. E tutti i progetti futuri che aspettavate con ansia sembrano essere messi in stand-by.

She doesn’t seem interested in sharing any emotional connection with you and there’s an almost palpable wall between you.

Avete ignorato per troppo tempo le bandiere rosse di una rottura del matrimonio? Sua moglie si sta allontanando da lei un giorno alla volta?

She doesn’t care about your whereabouts any longer

She used to want to know where you were and when you’d be coming home, which you always saw as a sure sign of her love and devotion.

But lately, she’s been completely uninterested in your whereabouts. It’s as if she loves her alone time too much.

If you stay at home, she gives you no attention and when you leave, she doesn’t care.

And it’s been seriously affecting your mental health. As if searching for signs that your wife wants to leave you isn’t bad enough.

Ma il trattamento silenzioso potrebbe davvero essere il chiodo finale.

Avete un passato di ripetizione degli stessi problemi

You’re not happy to admit it, but you tend to be a bit of a narcissist at times. Your wife pointed it out a few times, but you find it hard to change your ways.

And every time you have an opportunity to show her that you’re willing to work on a healthy relationship, you blow it.

There’s a lack of communication but you don’t really care. She’s been talking about seeing a marriage counselor but you’re not into that either.

It’s like you love your wife but only to a certain extent. If you’re asked to put her first and yourself second, it’s an issue for you.

You can’t remember the last time you spent quality time together

You know that this definitely isn’t a good sign but you can’t seem to be able to change it.

Ogni volta che proponete di fare qualcosa insieme, lei disdice all'ultimo minuto. Ogni volta che cercate di fare una mossa, lei si tira indietro.

Lately, it’s all about the kids, work and finances.

You can’t remember why she married you in the first place and after noticing so many common signs of a marriage breakdown, is there hope?

You don’t want to be a skeptic but how can you work on something when she doesn’t want to?

Correlato: 11 segnali di allarme che indicano che il vostro ex sta mettendo vostro figlio contro di voi

È costantemente risentita e critica nei vostri confronti.

Maybe she’s a stay-at-home mom who yearns for some changes and she’s been taking it out on you.

Tutte le relazioni a lungo termine attraversano momenti difficili e, dopo essere rimasta a casa a occuparsi della casa e delle bollette e a fare continuamente commissioni, forse si risente segretamente del fatto che tu te ne vada.

Dopo tutto, voi avete una pausa da loro, ma lei cosa ha? Dovete essere in grado di vedere le cose dalla sua prospettiva.

I can assure you that her constant criticism isn’t unfounded. Ask her openly about it and truly listen to what she has to say.

Ha iniziato a nascondere il suo telefono e il suo computer portatile intorno a voi.

Lately, your wife has been extremely secretive. Every time you go near her, she clutches her gadgets as if she’s keeping state secrets on there.

Could she be hiding something? I can’t say for sure but it’s definitely a red flag. All there’s left to do is address it and hope for the best.

You’ve noticed some of her personal belongings are missing

The accessories that she recently ordered from Amazon didn’t arrive at your home address (strano). Le sue cose, come vasi, cornici e gioielli, non sono più dove le teneva di solito.

Things have been missing and even though she thinks you haven’t noticed it, you totally have.

You’re dreading what this could mean. You cannot bring yourself to utter the words… but is she making plans for a divorce process?

Could she be moving her stuff away to her new place? There’s only one way to find out.

Rifiuta il contatto fisico

You haven’t done the deed in way too long. Every time you suggest it, she always has an excuse ready.

Either she has a bad headache or she’s just too tired or there are so many things on her mind that she can’t even think about it now.

Ma tutto ciò che si sente è no. For a while, you gave her the benefit of the doubt but now, you’re starting to suspect something’s really wrong.

Vedi anche: Inappropriate Friendships When Married: Are They Really ‘Just Friends’?

You suspect that she’s having an emotional affair

Out of all the signs that your wife wants to leave you, if this one’s true, it’s one that could cause irrevocable damage.

Le relazioni sentimentali sono le peggiori. Confidare a un altro uomo i suoi problemi più intimi significa che non vi vede più come il suo più intimo confidente.

You’ve lost that connection you once shared and now you’re a mere stranger in your own home going through an recupero della relazione. Ma si può tornare a com'era prima?

Vedi anche: Moglie lesbica: 10 segni rivelatori di una convivenza con una lesbica clandestina

She doesn’t validate your opinions anymore

Your wife doesn’t care about what you have to say; not about your kids, not regarding her work and not regarding anything she used to rely on you for.

You could tell her that you think she looks smashing and she’d be indifferent. She’s stopped taking your opinions into consideration.

She spends all of her time with her girlfriends…

She’s always had a trusted circle of her close friends and you’ve always encouraged her to spend time with them.

You love that she has them to have her back and be there for her, especially when you can’t. But now, she’s been spending the majority of her time with them.

There’s no longer a healthy balance of quality time with her family. Her friends take the top spot and you’re left with crumbs of her attention.

 … and if she’s not with them, she’s at work (more than she has to be)

It’s as if she’s purposely choosing to not spend time with you.

È questo uno dei segni più evidenti che tua moglie vuole lasciarti? Potrebbe sicuramente esserlo.

If she keeps making decisions that keep her away from you, it’s time to reevaluate your marriage.

It’s not a good sign that her friends and work keep taking all of her attention. Ask yourself this: Quale potrebbe essere la causa?

Recentemente ha vissuto un grande cambiamento

• Did she lose her job?

La perdita del lavoro potrebbe averla fatta riflettere a lungo sulle sue priorità. Un cambiamento come questo lascia il segno e induce le persone a rivalutare la propria vita.

• Have you recently welcomed a baby?

Having a child is never a saving grace for a marriage. If you’re not rock-solid, don’t expect a baby to help you forge a stronger connection.

It’s only going to create a wedge if things have been on shaky ground.

• Have you moved despite her not wanting to?

Costringere sua moglie a trasferirsi da qualche parte nonostante le sue proteste può essere il punto di svolta che ha reso più facile la sua decisione di divorziare.

Potrebbero esserci altri problemi di fondo, ma questo è stato il suo punto di rottura.

• Has she reached new success at work?

Upon experiencing newfound success at work, people’s egos get inflated.

If now she’s making more money, she could be reevaluating if she still needs you to support her. It’s childish but very common.

Vedi anche: Accettare le persone per quello che sono invece di cercare di cambiarle

Più ti avvicini, più lei ti allontana

Questo è un altro dei grandi segnali che indicano che vostra moglie vuole lasciarvi.

Tutte le vostre avances vengono respinte e più cercate di avvicinarvi a lei, più lei si disinteressa.

It’s as if your wife feels disgusted by your touch and it hurts you on so many levels. You are constantly torn between completely giving up and trying even harder.

You’ve been finding strange documents around your home

Sta cercando un nuovo posto dove vivere? Potrebbe frequentare un agente immobiliare e cercare di trovare un nuovo posto alle vostre spalle?

Observe the documents when you’re home alone and Google them if you manage to take a peak. That’ll tell you all you need to know.

She’s been showing an uncharacteristically vast interest in your kids

Spouses who are getting ready to leave make sure to do anything in their power that’ll help them in the custody battle.

This is why your wife has been showing a keen interest in your kids’ extracurricular activities and being very lenient with them.

She’s ‘buying’ their love and attention so as to ensure they want to remain with her in case they get to have a say in the process.

Combatte per il gusto di combattere

You could literally be sitting on a couch reading a book and she’ll approach you and bite your head off for not doing something else.

It’s like she vuole di litigare. Continua a trovare motivi per litigare, per rendere le cose più facili a se stessa.

There’s no point in trying to make sense of this.

If your wife is adamant to leave, there’s not much you can do to cambiare idea se non quella di mantenere il sangue freddo e cercare di capire il suo comportamento.

Your gut is telling you that something’s seriously off

And finally, you know that you can always trust your gut. No matter the situation or the circumstances, so far, it’s always been right.

And that’s what frightens you. You don’t desiderare per essere giusti.

You desperately want to wake up next to your wife, having realized that this was all a dream… But it’s all too real.

Your marriage is in shambles and you want to find a way to win your wife back but you’re out of moves.

Dovreste finalmente cedere? Potrebbe essere arrivato il momento di porre fine al vostro matrimonio?

Vedi anche: Rompere lo stereotipo: L'essenza dell'essere uno spirito libero

Come si può salvare il proprio matrimonio?

La comunicazione è fondamentale, quindi è necessario avere un rapporto sincero con il cuore.

I know you’ve probably heard this a million times but it honestly cannot be stressed enough. Communication can make or break you.

At first, it feels as if you can read each other’s minds. You don’t even have to speak and it feels like such a special connection. Telepathy in love, right?

Tuttavia, con il tempo, questa telepatia diventa un fastidio. L'aspetto che inizialmente vi ha attratto nel vostro partner diventa lentamente l'elemento che porta scompiglio nel vostro matrimonio.

Sapete perché questo accade? Perché entrambi vi sentite troppo a vostro agio nel vostro silenzio e questo inizia a pesare sul vostro matrimonio.

Yes, it’s nice that you know how your wife feels without her having to say it but what’s even nicer is approaching her and asking her how she is nevertheless, sitting down next to her and actually listening to her.

Potreste rimanere sorpresi da ciò che sentite.

So enough with the mind-reading and assuming. Voice your love, opinions and worries. Have heart-to-hearts and don’t ever take your connection for granted.

Lavorare sulla risoluzione dei conflitti e chiarire le questioni più urgenti.

Scommetto che ci sono problemi di fondo che non vengono affrontati.

By now, you’ve established a lack of communication as one of the signs your wife wants to leave you. Let’s turn the tables.

Voglio che siate voi i primi a chiarire le preoccupazioni che sospettate di infastidire vostra moglie. Mostratele la vostra disponibilità ad affrontare le cose difficili.

She needs to know that you won’t keep running away from the pressing issues.

Nessun matrimonio è privo di difetti, quindi indossate i pantaloni da uomo e mettetevi al lavoro.

Things won’t magically heal overnight; that only happens in movies. But what volontà happen is you’ll get one step closer to reconciliation.

You’ll start to gain your wife’s trust back and it’ll be a great first step toward a better tomorrow.

Continuate così, restate inflessibili nel vostro intento di riconquistarla e le cose potrebbero risolversi.

Make sure she knows you’re always available when she’s feeling low

Women need to know they have their partner to rely on at all times. Let’s be honest here; women truly do have it harder.

Who’s more likely to be a stay-at-home parent, you or your wife?

And who’s most probably doing the majority of the household chores? I think we all know the answer to that.

And there are countless little things that I’m not even going to mention here. You know what they are so the least you can do is be her support whenever she needs you.

Recognize when she’s feeling low and be there for as long as she needs you. Even if there’s a big game on.

Even if you’ve made plans with your buddies. Your wife’s needs should trump your little gatherings that can totally be rescheduled.

Do you have any idea how much it’ll mean to her seeing that you chose to stay with her instead of going out with the guys?

These things don’t go unnoticed. And the thing is, you should never do it because you feel obliged to, you should do it because you want to!

Vedi anche: Modi potenti per aumentare l'amore per se stessi e smettere di sentirsi indesiderati

Combattete per il vostro matrimonio e fate di lei la vostra priorità

From personal experience, I can honestly tell you that the one thing that really bugs me is when I don’t feel like a priority.

Yes, you’ve made a commitment and yes, you are loyal to her but do you put her before everyone else?

That’s the real question.

Vostra moglie è la vostra compagna in tutte le cose della vita.

She’s the one who sees you on your good days, loves you on your bad days and sticks around for the unbearable ones.

She’s the one holding your hand when you get bad news. She’s the one bending over backward to make you happy.

E come la ripaghi? Siate onesti con voi stessi. La mettete al primo posto?

Do you prioritize her over everyone else? She deserves it even when she’s being hormonal and unreasonable.

She deserves it even when she’s yelling at you for the hundredth time to put your plate in the sink.

No matter how hard some days are, she’s always the first one you need to run things by.

If she doesn’t feel prioritized, she will constantly wonder if she’s doing something wrong. No, she’s not. You are. How about changing it?

Trovare il modo di riconnettersi e ricostruire la fiducia nel vostro matrimonio

When you’re at a crossroads, the thing you need to ask yourself is what you can do to change things for the better. How can you make your wife see that your marriage is worth it?

For starters, start with the small stuff. My guess is, you’ve slowly lost that sparkle and the romance is out the door.

The bond you shared is withering and you need to remind your wife that it’s still there.

Affinché la situazione migliori, dovete sforzarvi di mostrare a vostra moglie un po' di amore.

Do something you know she’ll appreciate it (after all, you know her best) and go out of your way to make her happy.

It doesn’t have to be a gift or anything material. Do the grocery shopping for her.

Sorprendetela con una casa pulita quando torna dalla palestra. Fate il bagno ai bambini e metteteli a letto.

This will show her that she can count on you again. It’ll make her see that she can trust you to have her back.

E questo potrebbe farla sentire apprezzata e amata.

It doesn’t take a lot to win back her love. Simply be a loving, caring partner she knows she can depend on.

Fissate un appuntamento settimanale e fatelo diventare davvero importante

Now we’ve got to the good stuff. The honeymoon phase is awesome and everything but after it fades, there has to be a sense of love and commitment or you’ll fall apart.

Don’t stop making time for each other just because you’re no longer the young kids in love from ten years ago.

Al contrario, le serate di coppia sono un must!

Dedicate every Friday evening (or any day that works for you) to romantic dates. And you can’t flake!

Il punto è che si trova il tempo anche quando le giornate sono frenetiche.

Newsflash—there will sempre be something in your way but if you really want it, you’re going to make sure that it happens.

And there’s only one rule—no shop talk! Nel vostro caso, non parlate dei figli o dei loro hobby, delle faccende domestiche o delle bollette.

Si tratta solo di due persone innamorate che si sforzano di far funzionare le cose.

This is your one day a week where everything else doesn’t matter. Make it count!

Apprezzate le piccole cose che fa per voi e per la vostra famiglia.

She doesn’t have to be a stay-at-home mom for you to appreciate all of her amazing efforts so start letting her know that you don’t take everything she does for granted.

Dal fare la spesa, all'assicurarsi che i bambini siano al loro posto, all'organizzare feste di compleanno, alle riunioni dell'associazione genitori e a tutte le altre piccole cose che vi vengono in mente.

Iniziate a ringraziare. Cominciate a dimostrare la vostra gratitudine per un coniuge così devoto.

She doesn’t have to be all hands on deck all the time. But she is nevertheless.

Some appreciation really goes a long way because she can easily decide that she doesn’t care anymore.

Può lasciare a voi tutte le decisioni, i ritiri e gli acquisti.

Potrebbe andare in un centro benessere con le sue ragazze e non essere disponibile per l'intero fine settimana.

Potrebbe uscire e fare festa tutta la notte, per poi rimanere a letto il giorno dopo. Ma il fatto è che non lo farà mai.

And now that you’re slowly starting to be aware of the love, devotion and sacrifice she shows every day, I hope you’ll start being molto più apprezzabile.

Consulenza matrimoniale

It’s crazy to me how marriage counseling is seen as this negative thing. People act as if it means that you’re somehow failing but it’s the opposite!

Rivolgersi a un professionista significa prendersi il tempo necessario per fare davvero tutto ciò che è in vostro potere per far funzionare il vostro matrimonio.

It means you’re far from giving up. When there are signs your wife wants to leave you, this is the thing that could change her mind.

Most men are embarrassed by this notion but if you really love your wife and want her to see that, you’ll go to marriage counseling.

You’ll let a professional help you work out the issues and delve deep into your life.

Once you go, you’ll see what the fuss is all about. Admittedly, I was a bit hesitant before I went for the first time but let me tell you something…

From then on, I haven’t missed a session.

È diventata una grazia di salvezza per la mia relazione che l'ha aiutata in più di un modo.

So if you are at a crossroads, please, take this next step. I guarantee you that it’ll be the best thing you have ever done for your marriage.

Quando la vostra relazione vale, fate di tutto per salvarla.

Vedi anche: Sfida di 30 giorni per l'amore di sé: diventare la versione migliore di se stessi

5 segnali che indicano la necessità di procedere con il processo di divorzio

There’s physical, emotional or verbal violence in your marriage

Ci sono cose che non vanno mai trascurate e se uno dei due partner ha mostrato segni di violenza di qualsiasi tipo, l'unica via è l'uscita.

Se voi o il vostro partner siete ricorsi alla manipolazione emotiva, all'insulto estremo o, peggio ancora, alla violenza fisica, per il bene di tutte le persone coinvolte, ponete fine alla situazione.

Nessuno merita di subire un trattamento così orrendo.

In questo caso, il divorzio è la cosa migliore, oltre a mantenere una distanza di sicurezza l'uno dall'altro.

Your wife is adamant that she wants a divorce and there’s no changing her mind

Some people simply know what they want. She isn’t confused, perplexed or hesitant about her wishes, she has informed you of what she wants and you can’t change her mind.

In my advice, don’t even try. There is no point trying to salvare un matrimonio with an individual who’s already one foot out the door.

It might seem impossible now but one day, you’ll meet someone who’ll be one hundred percent sure about you and then, you’ll realize how toxic this marriage actually was.

Vedi anche: Tutto quello che c'è da sapere su una relazione transazionale

Lei si rifiuta di lavorare sui vostri problemi e voi continuate a sbattere contro un muro di mattoni.

Cercare di avere una conversazione con vostra moglie è inutile come parlare con un muro.

She just doesn’t want to address the circumstances, nor is she interested in hearing you out.

The weirdest thing is that she hasn’t specified that divorcing you is what she wants. All you’ve been able to figure out is her indifference.

And sometimes, that’s exactly what you need to know where you stand.

If she loved you or had any hope that your marriage could be saved, do you really think she’d be acting this way?

Non c'è rispetto reciproco tra voi due

Your wife used to be the one person you had the utmost respect for. Nobody could say anything to change your mind. But now, that’s long gone.

Vi dite le cose peggiori e avete zero rispetto per l'altro. La persona che prima stimavate così tanto è scesa molto in basso nella vostra mente.

The worst thing is, you don’t even know how it happened.

Vi siete appena svegliati e vi siete resi conto che le vostre prospettive sono cambiate in modo significativo e non la vedete più allo stesso modo.

You’ve both changed in completely different directions

Non condividete più gli stessi valori. La vita vi ha portato su strade molto diverse (e inaspettate), facendovi rivalutare il vostro matrimonio.

It’s not necessarily that you resent them or hold grudges; you’ve merely come to a realization that you’re no longer the same people you were when you first got married.

It’s extremely difficult to admit this but you both changed and grew apart in the process.

Fa schifo? Profondamente. Ma dovete essere onesti l'uno con l'altro? Al cento per cento.

Staying in a marriage that no longer means what it used to mean is unfair to both of you. People change. That’s just life for you.

If You Don’t Want Your Wife To Leave, You Need To Take Action

Now that you’ve gone through the signs that your wife wants to leave you (and all the ways in which you can stop it), what’s it going to be?

Avete intenzione di tenere il broncio in silenzio e lasciare che un avvocato divorzista entri nelle vostre vite o avete intenzione di fare qualcosa?

Yes, there are warning signs of a possible divorce but nothing’s set in stone yet!

Potete comunque fare in modo che vostra moglie si senta vista, ascoltata e amata come merita.

Marriage problems are anything but rare, so it’s all about pinpointing the issues and actively working on them.

Don’t let your best friend slip away if there’s something you can do about it.

Comunicate ora più che mai e dimostratele che siete convinti di ogni parola pronunciata nelle vostre promesse matrimoniali.

Why? Because, “True love stands by each other’s side on good days and stands closer on bad days.” (Sconosciuto)