I’ve been wrong about men my entire life. I’m not afraid to admit it. It’s not easy to grow up and live in a world that’s full of stereotypes.
I couldn’t know any better because that’s what I was taught in school, what I saw in movies, and read on the internet. Luckily, I managed to break through my prejudices and leave all the stereotypes behind me.
Although the guys I dated weren’t a perfect match for me, they taught me a thing or two about men in general. Who knew there are so many things about men we got completely wrong?
“Real men don’t cry”
Starting strong with the famous quote known to everyone! Come on, we live in the 21st century for God’s sake! I thought we’d be over with this by now.
Society portrays men as beings just walking around without a single worry in their heads. From the time we are kids, we watch movies where men are shown to be tough as a rock and emotionless.
That’s obviously not the case and we shouldn’t treat it as a condition to be considered manly. Even cartoon characters like Millhouse in the Simpsons are always ridiculed for being romantic and emotional.
We sometimes forget that men are also humans and thus have emotions, positive and negative, that need to be expressed without being mocked.
“Asking for help is a sign of weakness”
While I was living with my parents, my dad was in charge of repairing everything in our house and backyard. Mind you, he’s not a construction worker, electrician, or anything similar. Man is in finances!
However, that didn’t stop him from trying to do it all alone. He would spend hours repairing something, looking at YouTube tutorials, and annoying himself just so he wouldn’t ask for help.
This problem is rooted deeply in our belief that a man should be capable of doing everything on his own. In the same way, people expect all women to know how to cook, clean, and take care of kids, and they are shamed when asking for help.
Even if your first thought was that you knew men sometimes need help with physical stuff, you’re still biased. Who says they don’t need help with the mental workload as well?
“Mental health issues affect only women”
This stereotype is exactly why men don’t seek help when they need it. They are left alone to deal with their problems and don’t talk about them. They are made to feel less of a man if they speak up and admit that it’s all too much for them.
It’s unbelievable how much we evolve as people but still get stuck in some stupid misconceptions that should have been left in the past a long time ago. A shocking data revealed that men represent 78% of the total suicide rates in the U.S.!
Even though this is an awful fact, is it really surprising? This should be a wake-up call to finally break the stigma once and for all. Masculinity is not determined by the ability to mask our feelings. Period.
“Showing feelings takes away your masculinity”
I once went to a basketball game with my friend to cheer on her little brother. At the end of the game, the opposing team managed to score the winning shot and won the game.
He sat on the court all disappointed and sad while tears started running down his face. This is when his coach approached him and started yelling:
“What are you doing?! Toughen up, be a man!”
Who told men they needed to be macho all the time? They are humans, not damn vaults resistant to absolutely everything!
Showing feelings is the manliest thing a man can do! They’re exposing the deepest parts of themselves they usually hide. That’s brave and something only strong people can do!
And yes, men are our protectors, providers, and our safe place but they also need someone to hear them out and appreciate them.
If they’re only burying things deep in themselves, they’ll become a ticking bomb waiting to explode. Swiping things under the carpet doesn’t make them disappear. It just makes a huge bump and an opportunity to trip and fall.