um homem e uma mulher sorridentes sentam-se e bebem café

Deve beijar-se no primeiro encontro? 10 sins e nãos explicados

You’re getting ready for the primeiro encontro Quando se encontra com um novo rapaz ou rapariga, dezenas de perguntas passam-lhe pela cabeça. De que é que vão falar? Será que vais gostar dele?

Será que como tu? E se houver silêncio constrangedor? What if they don’t show up? What should you do to make a good first impression?

Sounds familiar, I know. Well, the truth is that we’ve all been there.

E, para além de tudo isto, há a questão final: Deve beija-se no primeiro encontro? The fact is that some people do, some don’t.

But is it obligatory to smooch when you first meet someone? What if you don’t like them enough? Or is it better to wait and see se haverá um segundo encontro?

Well, luckily for your love life, your troubles have come to an end. I’m here to give you some dating tips to help you resolve this dilemma.

Not only that – some daters will also share their experience with you – to help you get a broader perspective on things.

5 razões para beijar no primeiro encontro

um homem beija uma mulher com um chapéu

For starters, here are some reasons why people kiss on first dates. You don’t know – maybe one of these pros is exactly what you need to head in the right direction.

1. Pensar demasiado é sobrevalorizado

Is it okay to kiss on the first date? What if this is the last time you see each other? What if they get the impression that you’re crazy for them?

E se eles perderem o interesse depois de os beijar? E se eles só te virem como um engate, mas tu quiseres algo mais?

Yes, you could be racking your brain with all of these questions. But what’s the point?

Will overthinking help you with the outcome? It most certainly won’t. In fact, it’s more likely to destroy your relationship before it even starts.

That’s exactly why it’s much better to do your best and turn off your brain and follow your gut. I’m not saying that you should make reckless decisions, but hey, did one kiss ever really harm anyone?

I don’t think so. Just go with the flow and see where the night takes you!

2. Há muita química

Por vezes, a pessoa fica cativada pela outra desde o início. Seria um exagero chamar-lhe amor à primeira vista, but it’s definitely chemistry at first sight.

Há muito tempo que se prolonga contacto visual, “accidental” physical contact, and all the other non-verbal signs that you’re both into each other. Don’t pretend like the tension between you two isn’t real.

Não há muito raciocínio por detrás disto. Sente-se a química e só se quer beijar.

So, why wouldn’t you do exactly that? Wait until your date is over or just start kissing right there. What’s the worst that could happen?

3. You’re testing the waters

Have you ever been in a situation where you’re not sure se gosta ou não do seu par? Maybe you’ve met them on an aplicação de encontros online, e as coisas são de alguma forma diferentes agora que as vemos pessoalmente.

Or maybe you just have mixed feelings about them. Don’t worry, that’s perfectly normal, and it happens to everyone.

In that case, the first smooch is exactly what you need. It will help you test the waters and realize whether there’s enough chemistry for you to even consider a second one.

4. Não há melhor sinal não-verbal

If you’re not much into talking and hate dizer a alguém o quanto gosta dessa pessoabeijá-los é a melhor maneira de mostrar os seus sentimentos.

You don’t need to come up with a um monte de elogios, and you don’t have to worry about finding the right words – your lips will do all the talking for you.

Trust me – sometimes, it’s easier (and more effective) to express yourself with linguagem corporal sinais do que verbalmente.

5. Apetece-lhe

At the end of the day, do you really need a reason for kissing? You just feel like it, and that’s reason enough.

Of course, what matters here is mutual consent. It’s crucial to prestar atenção to the other person’s non-verbal signals before making a move.

Será um simples beijar de lábios, ou partilharão um apaixonado beijo francês? E quanto ao vosso colocação das mãos? Will it be just a kiss, or will it end up in making out? It’s only up to you two!

Ver também: Como confirmar um encontro: 9 dicas e exemplos de textos

5 razões para não beijar no primeiro encontro

um homem e uma mulher abraçam-se

Now that we’ve covered the fors, it’s time to pay attention to the reasons kissing on the first date is not the best idea in the world.

1. You don’t feel ready

It’s okay not to feel ready to kiss someone on the first date or just not to be in the mood for it. Your personal boundaries are important, and please, don’t allow anyone to cross them.

Don’t do anything just because you feel forced to do it. You’re still allowed to like the other person without having the need to kiss them – that’s your right.

Finally, keep in mind that you don’t need to justify your actions to anyone. If they make the first move, step back or politely tell them that you want to wait – without any guilt trips included.

2. You don’t want to send the wrong message

You have a feeling that this guy or girl you’ve started seeing will be special. And you don’t want to ruin things by rushing anything.

Quer que o levem a sério e prefere esperar pela sua primeiro beijo para ser especial e romântico.

That’s also a valid reason not to kiss on the primeiro encontro.

3. Um abraço é mais do que suficiente

Por vezes, um simples abraço can be more intimate than an actual kiss. Or you just feel like that’s too intimate for your first encounter.

In that case, be the one to lean in for a hug when you’re saying goodbye before you give them a chance to try and kiss you. Of course, there are diferentes tipos de abraços – you should hold them a bit tighter and a bit longer, so they get the message.

You’ll show them that you like them and that you’re comfortable with being physically close to them. At the same time, you’ll send a message that you want to wait a bit longer for the first kiss to happen.

4. You’re afraid of rejection

Making the first move takes a lot of courage, and don’t let anyone tell you differently. If you want to kiss the other person, but you’re not sure if they want the same, I would always advise you to go for it.

At least, you’ll know you tried and went after what you wanted.

No entanto, if you’re insecure about doing it and have trouble reading their non-verbal signals, it may be better to wait for a better opportunity. Maybe next time you’ll feel more confident, or they’ll show you more signs that querem beijar-se de volta.

5. It’s too intimate

For many, kissing is not such a big deal. But for you, it’s an intimate act, and you don’t enjoy locking lips with guys or girls who are practically strangers.

In that case, the answer to the question of, “Should you kiss on the first date?” is definitely no. Espere até conhecer melhor a outra pessoa e se sentir confortável beijar.

Ver também: O que enviar a um rapaz depois de um primeiro encontro: 70 melhores exemplos de textos

Beija-se no primeiro encontro?

um homem e uma mulher abraçam-se num parque de diversões e beijam-se

To get the right picture, I’ve asked a couple of daters (both men and women) to talk to me about their habits and experience regarding first dates and first kisses. Here is what they’ve revealed:

O segundo encontro é um encanto

“Personally, Penso que o primeiro encontro é demasiado cedo. Maybe it’s just me, but I wouldn’t feel comfortable kissing a stranger.

Além disso, de acordo com a minha experiência, a maioria dos homens vai gostar mais de si se se fizer de difícil no início.

Mas raramente fico à espera do terceiro encontro because, let’s face it, a guy could get the impression I don’t like him until then.

That’s why I think that the beijo no segundo encontro is perfect. Not too soon, not too late!”

– Julia, 33

Porque não?

“Doesn’t everyone kiss on the first date? Well, at the end of the date, if nothing else :chuckles:

If you ask me: should you kiss on the first date? – I ask you: why shouldn’t you? That is, if you feel like it, of course. After all, what is there to lose?”

– Amy, 29

Tudo depende

“Well, I can’t really give you a concrete answer. You see, it’s one thing if I went out with a guy I met on an aplicação de encontros online and haven’t had the chance to talk too much before the date.

In that case, I probably won’t kiss him.

But if I’m going out on a date with a friend of a friend I’ve been texting for a while, then, yes, I wouldn’t mind kissing him.

Além disso, depende do tipo de data. É uma encontro para café? Ou estamos no cinema?

And let’s not forget about body language. If there is some serious eye contact, and if he sends me the vibe of a good kisser, I’d definitely step up my game and take things to the next level.”

– Nikkie, 22

O que é que há para esperar?

“Absolutely! Nada me excita mais do que uma boa Beijo francês no fim da noite. Sair com alguém no primeiro encontro significa that you’re, if nothing else, attracted to them enough to kiss them.

It’s my job to make the first move, but hey, if she isn’t down for a smooch, it’s no big deal. I’ll take it like a man and accept it as the end of the night without a problem.”

– Steve, 38

Testar as águas é a melhor maneira de o fazer

“Who doesn’t enjoy a good kiss, especially if it ends up with alguns amassos e namorar? Eu sei que sim.

Ao mesmo tempo, I also make sure to respect my date’s boundaries. I pay attention to her body language signs and do my best to determine whether she’s down for it as well.

A última coisa que quero é tornar a situação desconfortável. Trust me – there is nothing worse than leaning in for a kiss on the mouth and having a girl give you a beijo na bochecha.

But if that happens, what can you do? It certainly won’t discourage me. I get it: some girls are shy and have a strict policy of no kissing when they first meet on a date.”

– Mark, 27

Is it bad if you don’t kiss on the first date?

um homem e uma mulher beijam-se

Some people prefer taking things slow, and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. It doesn’t mean that they don’t like you if they don’t initiate the primeiro beijo no primeiro encontro.

Não se esqueça de que isto é apenas o início e que há muito tempo para desenvolverem uma ligação significativa que terminará com um beijo.

Um beijo no primeiro encontro é um bom sinal?

Um beijo (ou qualquer outra forma de contacto físico) num primeiro encontro não é apenas um bom sinal de que alguém gosta de si – it’s a great sign. If they want to kiss you right after meeting you, it’s a signal that the attraction they feel for you is so strong that they can’t wait to see you again.

It’s definitely a sign that they like you and want something more. Of course, it’s up to both of you to take the wheel and drive this romance in the right direction.

Em que data se deve beijar?

o homem fica ao lado da mulher e troca carinhos

If you’re sure that there is mutual attraction and físico-química, there is nothing wrong with kissing on the first date (keep in mind that most people wait for the end of the date). But if you need more time to decide whether this person is kissable, it’s perfectly okay to wait for the second date.

O terceiro encontro é provavelmente a altura em que deve saber se se vê a beijar a outra pessoa ou não. If there is still not enough chemistry between you two at this point, I’m afraid to break it to you, but you should stay friends.

O que não se deve fazer num primeiro encontro?

I’m begging you not to do anything you’re uncomfortable with. Don’t do something just to please the other person or just because you think it’s expected from you.

But besides this, there are some other things you should avoid the first time you go out with someone (or ever). So, don’t:

  • Chegar atrasado
  • Pousar o seu par para se sentir melhor
  • Mencionar demasiado o ex-namorado/namorada
  • Passar a noite no telemóvel
  • Parecer barato
  • Ser demasiado insistente

Para terminar:

um homem e uma mulher sentam-se na relva e beijam-se

Todos os especialistas em relações dir-lhe-ão praticamente o mesmo: there is no right or wrong answer to the question, “should you kiss on the first date?” This decision is all yours, so forget about some nonexistent dating rules that tell you what you’re allowed to do.

Sabes qual é a coisa mais importante aqui? Beijar no primeiro encontro é aceitável. Esperar para dar o primeiro beijo também é perfeitamente aceitável.

The only thing that matters is that you and your date are both happy with the decision you’ve made. Forget about the norms and regulations!

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