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Signs You Need To Bench Him

Signs You Need To Bench Him

Like so many others who were under his spell, you were too busy planning your future with your so-called Prince Charming that you ignored all those curveballs he pitched your way. It’s not until the relationship ends abruptly and you’re sitting on your living room floor consuming more than 500 calories worth of ice cream that you realize that while you were ready to win the World Series with your man, he wasn’t ready to give you his jersey yet, because he was still in the batting cage with his past.

We all choose to believe what we want. Sometimes we wear blinders which prevent us from seeing the truth. However, if your so-called ‘Mr. Right’ is even throwing any of these subtle indicators your way, you may want to protect your heart and find yourself another game!

1. You are the complete opposite of his ex

My ex used to praise me for being so ‘different’. I had fire in my soul, hair as golden as the sun and I was completely outspoken when it came to giving advice, granted or not. He would always inform me that it was so great to have someone able to push him into being a better man. That same push, along with dishonesty, were the reasons why our relationship ended.

However, I was devastated when I found out my ex, who I had lived with, was already onto the next gal within a month… When I found out, my immediate instinct was to stalk her on social media. Armed with my great FBI skills, I was able to find out she was completely opposite from me. I was shocked: brunette, country girl, and never worked out a day in her life. She was the yin and I was the yang.

Needless to say, when a man tells you ‘you are so refreshing’, note that the only thing refreshing should be a glass of Chardonnay, not you!

2. Ready to walk down the aisle like yesterday

Rushing into another relationship after a serious one is probably sign number two that you’re the rebound. If he’s willing to be so #extra, promising you a great life ahead, a house, cars, kids, etc. so soon, you may want to take a step back from that altar and look at the bigger picture. Some men find pleasure in competing with their ex to see who can jump into the next relationship faster. Sorry sister, you might want to place those bouquets on hold.

3. Not ready to ditch the digits

So, he tells you he’s ready for the next step in your relationship, yet he’s not ready to give up the numbers in his phone or even lunch dates with his past. If you find yourself more often than not getting frustrated as to why he won’t ditch the past, maybe it’s a clear indicator he’s not ready to ditch her himself yet.

4. Being super-thirsty on social media

If he’s wanting #relationshipgoals all over social media, you make want to think twice about what his motives really are. So, he seems totally into you, with endless amounts of kissing photos and the late-night #outonthetownwithbabe. You find yourself consumed in endless poses just to get the perfect picture. So when the selfie pics stop, you may want to take your camera elsewhere.

5. Keep running into the ex

So you find yourself running into the ex more than you’d like? You see her at the gym, at his favorite coffee shop and, oddly enough, at the bar every Friday night. How dare she, right?! Wrong! This is a clear indicator he’s most likely using you as a ploy to make the ex jealous.

6. Talking badly about the ex

When you feel like you know more about the ex than you do your man, you may want to don those so-called glass slippers called sneakers and run the hell away from this relationship. Clearly, someone has underlying issues that need to be fixed within himself. Save yourself the endless amounts of long therapy sessions and clear your ears out from all the hatred he throws your way about his ex.

7. Parents are not ready to meet you

So he’s promised you to meet his parents soon but momma and poppa bear just aren’t ready to meet you? Before you blame the ex, you may want to take a step back and think as to why they don’t want to meet you. Mom and Dad both know what’s best for baby boy, so if his parents are not willing to meet you, I’d heed the warning.

So, if you find yourself dealing with the ex more often than you’d like, maybe it’s time to consider lighting a new candle for someone else, because the only one who can protect your heart is you.

  1. Chandelle says:

    You, my dear, exude a natural talent for writing. When you put the heart and real emotion in your writing like you do, you will never lack an audience. Keep it up, my dear! <3

  2. Elizabeth says:

    So true! I feel like I should get in my PJs, grab some wine and start venting.

  3. Angelica says:

    Great job! Like your being able to weave humour into a serious topic.

  4. Tallon says:

    Great article!

  5. Kasey says:

    Kicking ass and taking names! You’re awesome chica!

  6. Britt says:

    Love the metaphors

  7. Nan says:

    Yesssss! So proud of you for coming out on top! Love how you turned all of this tragedy into triumph. You’re going to help so many people from your experiences. Love this!

  8. Cbass says:

    This is really good and insightful. Great advice and a really fresh outlook on relationships.

  9. Kierstyn says:

    Love this! So good!

  10. David says:

    Awesome stuff! Understanding how guys are (because I am one), I see this in a lot of my friends relationships. They refuse to acknowledge these signs and end up wasting time. Listen up ladies!

  11. Laiza says:

    Awesome great advice. Thank you.

  12. Hayley says:

    Such a great article Anna and can’t wait to keep reading more from you! You have such an authentic way of expressing yourself through your words! You’re articles are such a gift and I am loving continuing to read them. Thank you for such good words sister!

  13. Maggie says:

    Excellent article! I loved how it had both a playful tone and really important message! I’m looking forward to more from this writer!

  14. Jessica Stevenson says:

    Great advice!!! I wish I would have read this in college when I was dating!

  15. Ashley says:

    I love this!

  16. Cara says:

    Good points throughout!

  17. Danielle Frei says:

    The best part: “never worked out a day in her life”. LOVE IT. Great article & sooooo on point. Can’t wait to read more!!

  18. gabbi says:

    absolutely love!! great advice and i definitely want to hear more abt the ‘Yes’s’ and ‘No’s’ of relationships 🙂

  19. EMILY says: