Whenever you enter a new relationship, deep down, some parts of you secretly hope that it will be forever. That it will survive despite all the challenges and obstacles.
You wish for it to be a fairytale in which you and your loved one will live happily ever after.
Whenever you start loving someone new, deep down, some parts of you hope that this time will be different. That you two will be better than all the other couples and that you will succeed, in the face of all odds.
At least this is the way I always think. You can call me a hopeless romantic, but I don’t see the point in letting someone in your life when you already have an exit strategy.
I don’t see any point in starting something new if you’re planning its end. In beginning a love story that you know has an expiration date right from the start.
However, things don’t always turn out the way we want them to. Sadly, many stories don’t have happy endings and many loves are not meant to last, despite all of our hopes and desires.
That is exactly what happened with us – we were obviously never destined to end up together. As much as we loved each other, we couldn’t fight against everything fate had prepared for us.
Don’t get me wrong, this doesn’t mean I blame the higher powers for our failure. I don’t blame either of us, either.
The truth is that I’ve accepted our end. I’ve come to terms with the fact that I lost you for good and that you’re not coming back.
Nevertheless, this doesn’t mean that I consider time spent with you wasted. It doesn’t mean that I regret giving you my entire self, nor does it mean that I wouldn’t have done it all over again, if I had the chance.
Most importantly, it doesn’t mean that we didn’t have a purpose in each other’s lives. It doesn’t mean we didn’t matter or our love wasn’t true.
You know, it took me ages to understand all of this. At first, when I lost you, I cursed my destiny for sending you on my path just so you could be taken away from me.
I wondered what the point of everything was – why God sent me a man I loved so much, if He knew he wasn’t my forever person.
Why did I have to experience a love so overwhelming and all-consuming, if I would end up suffering for it? What was the point in all of this pain that I was going through?
Then, after a lot of thought, it dawned on me that sometimes we can’t understand everything. I realized there are some reasons that are beyond our comprehension.
I discovered that our story served as a valuable lesson. A lesson that cost me endless sleepless nights and tears, but a lesson I’ll never forget.
I figured out that you were there to teach me how to love with my entire being. You were there to teach me how to deal with loss, how to remain strong despite all the hardships, and how to rise above the pain.
There to teach me that I am a self-sufficient woman who can survive everything life throws at her. To show me all of my inner power I never knew I had.
You were there to school me that I can’t always have whatever and whoever I want. That sometimes, life is a bitch who kicks us in the gut when we least expect it.
To teach me how to appreciate people while they’re still in my life. How to cope with sadness and nostalgia.
Most importantly, you were there to teach me that some people are not meant to stay. That some loves aren’t meant to last, as much as we want it to be.
So, maybe you don’t want to hear this, but after finally understanding all of this, I don’t regret losing you anymore. And you know why?
Because I know that everything I’ve been through was for my own good. Because I know that bigger and better things await me.
Because I know that we’ll both manage to be happy in the future without each other. Because I am convinced that we’ll both meet the people who are meant to be ours until the end of time.
And when that does happen, we’ll realize why things never worked between us.
