When should you consider taking your relationship to the next level? This is an important question that will inevitably come up after you’ve been with someone for a while and things are going really well. You might be thinking he could be the one, and your friends and family are dying to meet him. They keep bugging you to set up an introduction.
So, when should you take him home to meet your family or take him out to meet your trusted circle of friends? When are you really ready? The answer is…
It depends.
Sure, it’s a vague, but true. Every relationship is different, and everyone has a different comfort level. Trust your intuition first and foremost to understand when you are ready. You might be three weeks into this thing, and your heart feels as if you should be broadcasting this to the world. Three months might have already flown by, and something still seems off, so you’re taking your time and trying to figure out next steps.
We all come with a complicated past, too, and some are more complicated than others.
If you have had your heart broken before, you could be more reluctant to push this one forward. You may need a little more time. Or if you’ve ever been partnered with someone abusive, you may be reluctant to dive right in. There’s nothing wrong with this. In fact, if someone is pushing you into making a commitment and you feel uncomfortable with the speed at which things are progressing, this is a major red flag.
But, it’s also important to remember that we’ll never have all of the answers, and just because the last partnership went one way doesn’t mean this one will. Everyone is different and you shouldn’t compare an old connection with one that’s new – especially if the previous partnership didn’t end well. Worrying that this one will take the same path will only cause negative energy to fester. Like attracts like – emit positivity and you’ll get it back, emit negativity and…well, you understand.
While you may be bringing your same self to the table – you know you’re genuine and aren’t willing to be put on a façade – being with someone new will present with new exciting experiences as well as new challenges. There are likely to be some predictable patterns, but there will also be something unfamiliar thrown into the mix from time to time. So, if it took only a few days to bring your last beau home, it doesn’t mean this new relationship should follow suit.
Sure, it can be tough when loved ones have seen you go through a bad experience, and they are pushing to meet the new flame because they want to extend their approval – or not. While there is nothing wrong, of course, with valuing the input of those who know you best, you have to learn to trust yourself first. It’s endearing that your friends and family are being protective and are determined to make sure you aren’t hurt again, but this strategy also has a tendency to backfire.
So, make sure you are comfortable with the way things are going, and you feel comfortable sharing your new flame with the rest of the world before you set up an initial meeting. Only you will understand when it is the right time to take a deep breath and jump in.
Remember, it’s okay to not want to take a relationship to the next level, too.
Recognize your own emotional cues – thoughts, feelings, intended or unintended body language, and mannerisms that are all too familiar – and recognize when they are trying to tell you enough is enough. If there is something that was said or done that didn’t feel right, don’t second-guess your own judgment.
Sometimes you may not be able to put your finger on it, but something just feels off – if it doesn’t seem right, it’s not.
We don’t have to have all of the answers to have an answer to this question. If you feel it’s right to take your relationship to the next level, whatever that may be, go for it. If there is something nagging inside that says to hold off, do. If there’s something telling you to run, run and never look back. Trust yourself first, and everything else will fall into place.
