Every dating era, including today’s, has some unwritten rules. These are the guidelines most of us follow just because “that’s how things work”.
Nevertheless, have you ever wondered if these rules are actually making your dating life even harder? Here are 5 dating myths you have to bust if you want a happy love life.
1. The right girl can “fix” any man
How many times have you witnessed a situation where a troubled man will supposedly be fixed and cured by the right woman?
It doesn’t matter if we’re talking about a serial cheater, a player, a commitment-phobe, or about an emotionally unavailable man.
In all scenarios, everyone expects him to change once he meets a good woman who will open his heart to love.
A woman who will inspire him to be different and who will help him become the best possible version of himself.
Well, I say that’s a load of rubbish. Women are not rehabilitation centers for damaged men.
It’s not your job to repair them or to save them from themselves. Even if you’re a part of a couple, you’re both still responsible for your own choices and actions.
2. The first impression is everything
I won’t lie to you: the vibe you get when you meet someone new for the first time can help you form an opinion about them in many cases.
However, it doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t give men a chance to fix the first impression they made.
Don’t give up on a guy just because your first date was awkward or because he failed to knock you off your feet. He might have been nervous or maybe he just needs some more time to relax.
I know that this myth has been embedded in you together with the idealization of love at first sight.
However, trust me when I tell you that you can fall in love with someone you didn’t feel butterflies with when you first laid your eyes on him.
3. Love is always enough
Wherever you turn, you’re surrounded by romantic comedies and novels which glorify romance. In these stories, love is all that matters.
It was like that in the fairytales you read as a child, in all those chicks flicks you watched as a teenage girl, and even in some classic books and movies that are widely popular among all ages.
Love is this force that can beat everything and everyone but can’t be beaten. It has the strength to overcome all possible obstacles and if it’s real, it will last a lifetime.
Basically, you’ve been taught that love is enough for two people to work out. Well, guess what: it’s not.
It doesn’t mean that you and your ex didn’t love each other enough just because your relationship failed.
It doesn’t mean that you’ll succeed with some other guy just because you share some deep emotions.
Yes, love is crucial. However, if it’s not accompanied by trust, respect, compatibility, and many other things, love cannot be enough.
4. The guy always has to make the first move
According to some old fashioned dating rules, it’s the man who courts the woman.
He is the one who should chase you, who should send the first text, who should initiate communication, who should ask you out on a first date, and make all the other important moves in your relationship.
Well, let me tell you that this is nothing but a myth you need to forget about if you want a happy love life. After all, this rule has absolutely nothing to do with logic and common sense.
What if you like a guy who simply doesn’t notice you? Does it mean that you should sit around, patiently waiting for him to magically become a mind reader and to approach you just like that?
Of course, you could always do that. However, if you do, you’ll miss out on a lot of opportunities.
Besides, we’re all about equality. So, let’s be equal when it comes to this as well.
5. It doesn’t matter what your friends and family think
Choosing your forever person should be your decision only.
After all, this is the person you’ll be spending the rest of your life with and you’re the only one who has a say when it comes to this huge decision.
Therefore, almost everyone will tell you to just listen to yourself when it comes to this choice.
People will advise you to disregard everything your family and friends have to say and to go after you want.
Well, at the risk of sounding old fashioned, I have to disagree with this. In fact, it is also one of the dating myths you should bust as soon as possible.
Don’t get me wrong: I’m not telling you to blindly listen to your loved ones, to live your life under their terms, trying to please them.
Nevertheless, I’m asking you to take their opinion into consideration, if nothing else. Never forget that these are the people who love you and only want what’s best for you.
Besides, they’re not in love with this man, so they don’t idealize him. They don’t have their rose-tinted glasses on so they can be more realistic and see some things you probably don’t.