Al tipo que me golpeó hasta la muerte emocional

Estimado “Savior”,

Who would have thought I will be thanking you after all you have done to me? Isn’t life full of surprises? One moment you are dying inside and the other one you are finally free—you are the happiest person alive.

Well, my dear, thank you for giving me the gift of freedom. Thank you for giving me the gift of life. Thank you for making me realize I’m much more than I thought.

Gracias por golpearme hasta la muerte emocional. Sólo entonces podría haber nacido de nuevo. Sólo entonces, cuando no tenía nada más que perder, pude darme cuenta de lo que me estaba perdiendo.

Thank you for making me see that I need a man by my side—not you, not a dirty little cockroach, but un hombre de verdad.

Thank you for making me realize I can’t sink much lower from where I am now. I’ve hit rock bottom. That fall beat some sense back to me. That hit in the head was the best thing that has ever happened to me.

Por primera vez, aquel torrente de sangre no fue en vano. Por primera vez, caer inconsciente fue un hermoso sueño y no una pesadilla.

Todas las veces anteriores, cuando me hacías caer inconsciente, soñaba contigo. Nunca quise despertar porque sabía que despertaría a tu lado. Porque sabía que mi pesadilla nunca terminaría.

Esta vez era diferente. Esta vez quería despertar y luchar. Y lo hice.

I fought with everything I’ve got. I thought that I didn’t have it in me anymore.

Durante un breve periodo de tiempo, me lo quitaste—along with my pride, self-respect, self-worth and independence.

I thought I was nothing without you. I was scared of living my life without you. I thought you were the one who’s going to help me.

Nunca pensé que eras tú quien me sujetaba.

Every second I spent with you was like trying to swim in a deep and vast cold ocean with no help on the horizon. I swam and I swam, but something was pulling me down—it was you.

Ya no. Aquella horrible noche fue la noche en que por fin me zafé de tus garras. De repente, vi la orilla y pude nadar hasta tierra firme.

It all began with a simple question that night. A question that turned into an explosion. You were yelling—that was nothing new. I got used to your sharp notes when you screamed at me. It was like I was listening to the most beautiful notes anyone ever wrote.

Then, it got rough. You’ve pulled me down onto the floor like I was a piece of nothing. You dragged me by my hair with your fists full of it. Your cold heartless hands were wrapped around my neck.

I was begging for you to kill me. No, you didn’t. You kept me hanging on a thin line between death and life. Just to make me suffer.

Lo último que recuerdo fue un golpe frío y seco en la cabeza. Y eso fue todo. Pensé que por fin había muerto. Pero en lugar de eso, tuve un sueño.

The most beautiful dream. The dream that finally set me free. The dream that said: “Get it together!”

Gracias por eso. Gracias por llevarlo un poco más lejos de lo que querías.

Ese pequeño paso extra que diste significó mucho para mí.

Me liberó.

Atentamente,

Su ex amante