¿Es mi novio? 15 señales legítimas de que por fin sois novios

You’ve met through a dating app (possibly Tinder) or texting and things have really been going well!

You spend time together, do little things for each other, and you’ve taken things to the next level quite fast.

Y ahora, ¡estar con otra persona a estas alturas parece una locura!

So far, there are no red flags, and even though he’s a new guy in your life, you feel incredibly comfortable in his company.

And all your best friends are giving you a hard time because lately you’ve been ditching them for your new relationship (although you’re not sure if you should be calling it that quite yet…)

Usually, you’re not one for online dating, but with this guy, it isn’t a big deal as he’s genuinely the same guy his Tinder profile said he was.

There are good signs about him everywhere you look, but you’re just so hesitant to call him your boyfriend, even though he legit feels like one.

¿Cómo averiguarlo de una vez por todas sin tener que preguntárselo directamente?

Véase también: Una cariñosa carta abierta a mi novio a distancia

Definir la relación

The beginnings of a relationship are always the most exciting, fun, and unpredictable, while at the same time so daunting and scary, as you never know if you’re on the same page.

¿Cómo sabes cuándo puedes llamar novio/a a alguien?

¿Cómo pasar de ser buenos amigos a una relación comprometida con una transición clara y sin problemas?

What has to happen for a person you’ve known since high school (or just met recently met through social media) to become your boyfriend?

Well, there are a few things that have to happen in order to be able to call the person you’ve been seeing your boyfriend, even if it’s still a very nueva relación.

En primer lugar, deberíais pasar mucho tiempo juntos y enviaros mensajes de texto o llamaros con regularidad.

There has to be some sort of a connection and eagerness to see each other, otherwise it’s doomed from the get-go.

I know this firsthand. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve asked myself that pesky question.

¿Es mi novio? ¿Por fin somos oficiales?

More often than not, I’d be rushing into things without really having a good grasp of what a relationship actually is.

So now, I can say I’ve got a fair amount of experience with that gray area to know when things are taking a turn for the better and when you’re just living in fantasy land.

I’m going to share with you a lot of useful bits from my colorful personal experience, along with some solid relationship advice I got in the process.

¿Es mi novio?

es una de las cosas más desconcertantes que puede preguntarse una chica, y todo el mundo merece saber la verdad, por muy bonita o difícil que sea de tragar.

A relación sana renuncia a la Y si... porque, con el hombre adecuado, siempre sabes a qué atenerte.

And since sometimes, discerning his signals and figuring out where it’s going can be challenging due to a sudden rush of all kinds of emotions, I’ll help you discover the status of your relationship.

You’ll never have to wonder if he’s your boyfriend again because these signs will tell you once and for all.

Buena suerte.

Véase también: ¿Sexo con amigos? Los 10 mayores secretos que nadie te contará

Realmente hace un esfuerzo por verte

It’s the little things like this that make it truly count.

See, if a man wants to see you, he’ll move mountains if need be.

And if he doesn’t, he’ll just keep making excuses.

La gente saca tiempo para quien quiere sacar tiempo!

¿Su hombre planea citas nocturnas?

¿Saca tiempo de su apretada agenda para pasar tiempo contigo sin hacerte sentir culpable?

Todos esos son signos de un gran novio en ciernes.

Te hace sentir querido y apreciado, y disfrutas cada segundo que pasas en su compañía.

It’s easy to let the girl organize everything and just show up (if that).

Pero un chico que hace planes, se atiene a lo que dice y nunca pone excusas es un chico al que puedes considerar un novio de verdad y de fiar.

Te llama regularmente

Los mensajes de texto son del año pasado. Es broma.

Los mensajes de texto están muy bien, pero cuando un chico va en serio contigo, en algún momento las llamadas telefónicas se convertirán en algo habitual.

It goes without saying that you’re probably texting all the time, but as the relationship progresses, you should start calling each other a bit more often.

So if your guy doesn’t mind picking up the phone and having an actual conversation (aside from texting of course) every now and then, you’re probably on the track to a healthy relationship!

I’ll be the first to admit that phone calls aren’t my favorite thing in the world, but with an actual boyfriend, they’re a necessity.

Almuerzan juntos

Tener noches de cita es TAN importante para tu relación.

Tenéis que pasar tiempo juntos para construir y reforzar esa conexión.

Pero las fechas de los días son igual de importantes (si no más).

Quedar para almorzar significa querer verse a primera hora del día y eso significa algo.

Salir por la noche siempre incluye bebidas, posiblemente otras personas, y mucha música y emoción.

Pero el brunch significa una comida agradable y significativa entre dos personas en la que puedes mantener una conversación real mientras estás completamente sobrio y recién levantado.

I don’t know about you, but I don’t have brunch with casual hook-ups.

Así que si tu hombre te saca a pasear durante las primeras horas del día, sus intenciones están bastante claras (¡quiere ser tu novio!).

Véase también: 8 señales sencillas del amor verdadero de una mujer

You don’t spend all your time in the bedroom

Sex is a vital aspect of any relationship and whoever says that it doesn’t play a big role is lying.

You need to be sexually compatible, otherwise, there’s no chance you’ll make it work.

There’s always room for improvement, but if your needs aren’t met and it feels weird and wrong, you’re not with the right dude.

So now that we’ve cleared that up, make sure you click on ALL levels and never settle for mediocre sex.

When you find a guy who gives you what you need and satisfies your desires in the bedroom, that’s the real deal.

Pero el sexo no es TODO en torno a lo que gira vuestra relación.

Hay que pasar tiempo de calidad también fuera del dormitorio.

Pasar tiempo al sol, quizás disfrutando juntos de un hobby, o simplemente viendo la televisión y sintiéndose felices y en paz.

When time spent outside the bedroom is as good as the time spent IN it, then you know you’re officially a couple!

You’ve met each other’s family and friends

First thing that’s important to note is the vast difference between women and men when it comes to chatting about their new boyfriend/girlfriend.

It’s highly unlikely that a man will go on about you to his family and friends as much as you will because men don’t have that need to talk about everything with their best friends like girls do.

So you shouldn’t be worried if you haven’t met todos of his buddies and still don’t know his entire family.

You’ll get there.

Siempre que conozcas al menos a uno o dos amigos íntimos y quizá a su hermana o a cualquier otro familiar directo.

Guys don’t put that much thought into these things, so don’t worry about it too much.

You probably obsess over it way more than he does and he plans on bringing you home at some point, but there’s no rush on his part because, as I’ve said, guys just don’t care about it too much.

He doesn’t mind PDA

This doesn’t mean that every guy has to be into PDA (because they’re not) but if your man is into this, then you’ve got a keeper!

A man who can hold your hand and kiss your cheek as you’re strolling down the street is a man who’s happy to show the world his love toward you.

When a guy can hug you, hold you, and give you a huge smooch anywhere public, without caring who’ll see and what they’ll think, now that’s a guy who’s quite clearly head over heels for you.

Not all guys will do that (and it doesn’t have to mean anything) but if yours does, he’s one proud boyfriend who you should stay close to!

Puedes hablar literalmente de cualquier cosa con él

Una de las cosas que más me gustan de la gente es poder hablar libremente con alguien sin contenerse.

I’ve had a boyfriend that was my lover, my life partner, and my best friend all in one.

Hablar con él era un sueño y podía tener conversaciones con él sobre literalmente cualquier cosa y no cansarme nunca de él.

He challenged me intellectually, didn’t fear defying me, and always told me the truth.

Talking to him was a breath of fresh air, as people like him don’t come by very often.

¿Cómo te sientes cerca de su ¿Chico?

¿Te llenan vuestras conversaciones y disfrutas charlando con él de las cosas más aleatorias?

¿Te cuenta sus secretos y compartes con él tus miedos más profundos?

La conversación es una parte vital de una relación, y si puedes hablar con él de cualquier cosa, en cualquier momento, entonces sabrás que sois una pareja legítima.

Véase también: 20 increíbles y bonitas ideas de citas nocturnas para todas las parejas

Habla de ti en tiempo futuro

Un chico sin intención de quedarse en tu vida nunca hará planes de futuro contigo.

He’ll never insinuate that there’s a future together because he knows there isn’t one.

But when a guy says ”we” instead of ”I” when making plans or talking about his dreams, that tells you everything you need to know.

Este tipo quiere que te quedes.

He sees you in his future plans and whenever he’s talking about where he sees himself, later on, he always pictures you there too.

Isn’t that all the reassurance you need? For me, there isn’t a sweeter thing in the world than a man planning a future around you and making sure you know it.

You’re comfortable being dressed down around him

Cuando empezasteis a salir, siempre ibas vestida de punta en blanco y bien maquillada.

You’d enjoy dressing up for him and you’d never let him see you in your natural state (puffy eyes, baggy clothes, and a messy bun).

But lately, you’ve stopped caring about all that.

Ahora, te sientes tan cómoda siendo completamente tú misma a su lado.

You used to dread being seen without makeup, but now you couldn’t care less.

Te hace sentir guapa en todo momento.

A few months ago it would’ve been a no-go on letting him see you in your oversized T-shirt and your home-edition leggings, but now that’s mostly how he sees you and you love it!

Don’t get me wrong, dressing up for your man is really nice from time to time, but being your messy self around him is so much more important because that’s simply you!

And if you feel loved in all of your versions, you’ve got yourself a real one.

Conoce a todos tus amigos y tus relaciones con ellos

Lleva la cuenta de todas tus chicas y de lo que hacen.

He knows them all by name and he’d be able to tell you the ones you’re closest to and which ones have been getting on your last nerve lately.

Te escucha de verdad cuando hablas de ellos y te ofrece su opinión.

So he knows that Laura is like a sister to you and that you’d do anything for her.

He knows all about Jenny’s latest hookup and the embarrassing story behind it (no judgment, though!)

He knows how quirky Samantha and Emma are, and he’s already used to their dry sense of humor.

He genuinely cares about knowing them because they mean a lot to you, ergo, they’re important to him too.

Es agradable poder hablar de ellos con él, sabiendo que realmente te entiende y que tiene consejos útiles cuando los necesitas.

Tiene un cepillo de dientes en tu casa

Un cepillo de dientes nunca es sólo eso.

It means this guy knows he’s going to spend time at your place a lot, and he came prepared!

Leaving things at each other’s place means that the relationship is moving in the right direction.

This is a big deal! If you have a drawer specifically for him and vice versa, you’re one step closer to moving in together.

The pace is right, the intentions are clear and your willingness to leave stuff over (knowing it’s more than okay) means you’ve become a legit boyfriend/girlfriend.

Dejarse cosas es, básicamente, inventarse una dulce excusa para ir a verlos todo lo posible (no es que necesites una excusa).

If your man plays video games at your place, laid back on your couch, and you can do your nails at his, you’ve entered the relationship zone.

Te llama con nombres dulces y cariñosos

When you’re in a committed relationship, it goes without saying that you develop cute pet names for each other and it simply becomes a habit to call each other those things.

It’s not uncommon to prefer calling him ”babe” instead of his actual names because you simply adore him too much.

Y, a su vez, te llama con nombres especiales que te derriten.

Véase también: 13 Poderosas Maneras De Cambiar Tu Vida Despertando Tu Divino Ser Femenino

Te respeta y te anima

A lot of men who aren’t serious in their intentions don’t really care about your ambitions and goals, and your journey to achieving them.

They just want one thing from you and they’re good to go.

Pero un hombre digno del título de novio es otra historia.

Este hombre se preocupa por lo que haces con tu vida.

He doesn’t let you give up on yourself and he pushes you to the ends of your abilities.

Quiere de verdad que tengas éxito porque tu felicidad es su felicidad.

Una relación sana significa dos personas que se quieren en lo bueno y en lo malo y que se levantan mutuamente.

If your man is the wind beneath your wings, you’ve got yourself a real boyfriend.

He doesn’t present you with ultimatums

Los tíos pueden ser muy raros y molestos con las chicas y sus carreras.

Not all guys are respectful of their girl’s ambitions and they often resort to ultimatums if they don’t get enough attention due to their girl’s busy schedule.

That’s a whole thing right there, but we’re going to focus on those small select few who understand that women have jobs and dreams too, and don’t hold it against them.

Un chico digno de llamarse tu novio nunca te hará elegir entre él y tu trabajo, ni entre ninguna otra cosa.

Tu novio conseguirá que puedas hacer más cosas a la vez y triunfar en todos los ámbitos.

He’ll understand that he’s not your sólo priority in life but he’s very high on your list.

If, and only if you’ve got a guy who truly gets this, you can call him your boyfriend.

He’s the reason for constant joy in your life

At the end of the day, we all just yearn for that special someone who’ll bring joy and peace to our lives.

Sin estrés, sin ansiedad y sin señales contradictorias que apunten a una ruptura.

Estar cerca de esta persona debería ser como una chispa que se enciende de nuevo cada vez que la ves.

Su presencia debería proporcionarle felicidad y alivio inmediatos.

If it doesn’t, it’s honestly not worth it.

Life’s too short to spend time on people who cause you stress more than they actually make you happy.

Don’t be afraid to admit to yourself that you simply crave joy and peace.

If this guy makes you feel all tingly on the inside and brings a smile to your face the minute you lock eyes, you’ve found yourself a keeper.

Véase también: Atelofobia: 5 señales importantes de que sufres miedo a la imperfección

Para terminar

After carefully going through all of the signs above, I hope you’ve been able to figure out the status of your relationship and if your man is indeed worthy of being called your boyfriend.

The first thing you should take away from this article is that it’s okay to put yourself first.

It’s okay to expect all those things because you deserve that, and more.

At some point in life, you realize that it’s so insane sacrificing your own happiness for the sake of someone who doesn’t give you half the effort that you give him.

If you’ve got a guy who checks most of these boxes, then you’ve snagged yourself a real, kind, respectful boyfriend.

Nunca te conformes con menos. Nunca te mientas a ti misma con la esperanza de que él cambie a mejor.

If he doesn’t hold your hand when you’re struggling and never lifts you up when you’re down, he’s not your man.

Be with someone who’ll make you a priority when everything is making it difficult to put you first.

Be with a man who’ll always make time for you without checking his schedule, because that’s the sign of a man who’s irrevocably in love with you.

And that’s the only type of man you should ever be with.