6 razones sinceras por las que no quiero enamorarme

Cuando la gente me pregunta por qué I’ve been single for so long and when I tell them that I don’t want to fall in love, they are usually shocked. In fact, many think that I’m lying to cover up the fact that I can’t find a partner.

Well, guess what? I’m being completely honest. The truth is that I don’t want to fall in love and here is why.

1. I’ve been hurt in the past

I won’t lie to you; I’ve been herido en el pasado and that’s why I don’t want to fall in love again.

Mis desamores dejaron secuelas inborrables en mi salud emocional y mental. Me han roto el corazón más veces de las que puedo contar.

So, you might as well say that I’m scared of falling in love again.

Lo último que quiero ahora mismo es darle a otro hombre la oportunidad de jugar conmigo y darme otro disgusto.

I’m not ready to put myself out there. I’m not willing to take a chance or to risk getting crushed all over again.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that everyone will be the same as my exes.

However, I’m too much of a coward to give anyone an opportunity to come into my life just so he can end up destroying it.

Maybe along the way I’ve become incapable of loving. Maybe all those toxic men destroyed my faith in love.

Algunos dirán que el amor verdadero merece todos los riesgos.

However, if we’re being honest, there is a much bigger chance of running into someone who will break your heart than into someone who will fix it.

The truth is that I don’t want to fall in love again when my wounds are still wide open and pretty fresh.

2. Llevo mucha carga emocional

Another reason why I don’t want to fall in love is the carga emocional que llevo conmigo.

Me guste o no, esta carga emocional arruinaría todos mis nuevos romances.

In fact, they wouldn’t even have a chance to end up healthy. They’d be based on lies and deceptions.

It’s not that I still have romantic feelings for someone from my past, I’m just haunted by the demons of my previous relationships. My emotional baggage is weighing me down.

It’s a burden that is always present on my chest.

Esa no es la forma en que quiero entrar en mi próxima relación. Verás, quiero estar completamente curada antes de dejar entrar a alguien nuevo.

Después de todo, sería completamente injusto arrastrar a otro hombre a mis propios problemas y traumas.

I don’t know whether I could give myself to him fully while I’m still broken.

I don’t want to lead him on or use him as my rebound, as that way, I would be the same as those men who hurt me in the past.

Besides, I don’t need a man to heal me and to help me fix my broken heart. Instead, I want to do it by myself.

Hasta que eso ocurra, evitaré enamorarme.

3. Quiero centrarme en mí mismo

Call me selfish but I don’t want to fall in love because I want to focus on myself. I think that this is the period in my life which should be reserved for self-improvement.

I don’t want to waste my precious time and energy on chasing some guy, having relationship dramas or suffering after a break-up.

En cambio, quiero invertir todas mis capacidades en convertirme en un mejor persona y la mejor versión posible de mí mismo.

Este es el periodo en el que quiero concentrarme por completo en mi educación y mi autocuidado. Quiero trabajar en mí misma, encontrar nuevas aficiones, leer y descubrir cosas nuevas sobre mi personalidad.

El periodo en el que quiero viajar, explorar nuevos lugares y culturas y en el que quiero aprender.

Este es el periodo en el que quiero poner mi vida en orden.

Este es el periodo en el que quiero convertirme en una mujer autosuficiente e independiente que tenga todo lo que necesita.

Into an emotionally and financially stable woman who doesn’t wait for a man to provide for her.

Basically, I want to be content with the person I’m becoming and I want to give it my maximum.

4. Disfruto de mi soltería

To be honest, I don’t feel the need for an emotional partner because I have an awesome time by myself. I’m not lonely and I don’t feel alone in this world.

I couldn’t care less about social norms. I don’t care whether people are talking behind my back, commenting that it’s time for me to finally settle down.

Going to events without a plus-one doesn’t bother me. Spending Valentine’s Day by myself doesn’t concern me.

After all, just because I am not in love, it doesn’t mean that I don’t have anyone to talk to or to share my life with.

Tengo a mis amigos, a mi familia y, lo que es más importante, me tengo a mí misma.

In fact, I’m happy with my peace. Even though I’m not claiming that romantic relationships are all about fights, the truth is that I’m better off without unnecessary arguments.

Also, I love that I don’t have to compromise with anyone.

I love the fact that I can do whatever I feel like, without having a partner I should consult or agree with. With the fact that I don’t answer to anyone but myself.

Yes, in this case, I’m the only one who carries all the responsibility for my life.

However, it’s easier that way; I’m the only one making the decisions and the only suffering for my wrong choices.

5. I’m not into modern dating

Maybe I wouldn’t be running from love this much if I had been lucky enough to be born in a different era. In an era when people were honest and trustworthy.

Si hubiera nacido en los viejos tiempos, cuando sabías a qué atenerte desde el primer día, cuando podías confiar en un hombre cuando te decía que te quería. En una época en la que existían caballeros que hacían sentir especial a cada chica.

The truth is that another crucial reason why I don’t want a relationship is the citas modernas practices that I don’t fancy.

Verás, las relaciones esporádicas, los ligues ocasionales y los rollos de una noche no son lo mío.

I can’t separate my body from my heart and mind so I know it is impossible for me to stay emotionally detached from a man I spend time with.

Don’t get me wrong, this doesn’t mean that I judge those who like these things but it’s just not something I feel comfortable doing.

I’m an old-fashioned type of gal. I need a man who will court me and who will wait for me to be ready for the next step of our relationship.

Besides, I’m not someone who gets along well with mixed signals or hot and cold games and I can’t cope with ghosting or unlabelled relationships.

6. I don’t want to lower my standards

People tend to tell me that I’m demasiado exigente cuando se trata de hombres. Bueno, la verdad es que sé exactamente qué y a quién quiero.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not looking for a perfect man. After all, I know that I have my share of flaws and I’m perfectly aware of them.

Sin embargo, si me enamoro, quiero que sea de alguien que cumpla mis normas, que me niego a rebajar.

I’ve worked hard to build myself into the person that I am today and I’m not ready to settle for less than I deserve.

Besides, I want a real, mature man, I don’t want a project.

I don’t want a boy I’ll have to raise or guide through life, a toxic guy who won’t see my worth or will be intimidated by it or someone who is not ambitious enough to become a better person and to make something out of his life.

Therefore, I don’t want to fall in love with you if you’re not a grown man who knows how to treat a lady right.

De hecho, preferiría quedarse soltero forever than to be with a guy who is not what I’m looking for.

Guess what? I’m not the only one who refuses to fall in love.

De hecho, hay tanta gente que se siente exactamente como yo, que incluso hay canciones que hablan de mi lucha.

Actually, while I was writing this article, I couldn’t help but listen to the Don’t Wanna Fall In Love lyrics from a single by the great singer Jane Child from Canada, released in the late 1980s, together with a music video accompanying it.

Recientemente, otro gran cantante, KYLE, de Estados Unidos, hizo un remix de esta increíble canción, que está producida por M-Phazes.

Es más o menos así:
It’s just I don’t want to fall in love. (Nope.) Love cuts just like a knife. (That’s right.) You make the knife feel good. (So good, so good.) I’ll fight you till the end.